Yardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 6)

[Jengles 0]

that, they find it VERY hard to believe, but once you've been through something like that, it kind of messes with your head. But you have to realize at some point that all MEN are not the same and I love and respect my daddy and brothers very much. So my HEART has been through it.

Good for you Lawny. It's important not to carry that into your next relationship for sure.

True brownin, it took me almost a year to build myself up again. I stayed in a loveless relationship thinking I could possible change it or was worried about my son not doing well without his dad. I never in a million years thought I would be a single mom, but I've been doing it since my son was born, even though his dad lived with us.

mi neither, but it's possible right and then i couldn't imagine it with two people because i was so used to doing everything by myself, but that is a next topic

[Jengles 0]

That was over the top, Tre. I think I would do the same thing you did in that situation.

I don't think it is disrespectful if done with class and not so in your face. Andre always tells me I flirt with both men and women at restaurants and by my comments and smile end up with a better table and better service.

haha, I flirt with women too! I guess thats why I say its really just playful and not sexual at all.

Ok that is good that we clarified. When I think of flirty I think of sexual and teasing and inappropriate if you are in a committed relationship. I get what you mean though...just wouldn't put the term flirty to it...more overly nice, super friendly etc.

Yeah, I think flirting has different levels, but I mean it in the sense of playfulness, not like a sexual scanvenger, haha. I think when it gets to the latter, there's a bit more than flirting expected to come out of the situation.

Exactly what I am saying. The intent behind it is what defines it for me.

Pardon mi...mi might too kuntri fi dis...How do you FLIRT with class in front of your SO? Please, enlighten me or elobratishhh fi mi.

My neighbor (and our landlord) came outside the other night when we were sitting out there. I said to him, "nice haircut. Makes you look so boyishly handsome." Flirty. Absolutely no intent behind it.

plus i think it all boils down to honesty and putting everything out in the open. If i talk to a guy friend, i'll just mention it in passing. just a one liner I spoke to such and such today. no need to get all into the conversation. but it's out there. I think secrets are what tear down relationships

[Shemmy 4]

GIRLS I WANNA SHOUT...I FEEL THE BEST I'VE FELT IN 1 1/2 MTH..OMG NEVA THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD COME..MI A PRAY IT STAY THOUGH...MI EAT ACKEE AND SALTFISH TODAY AND MI CRANBERRY JUICE SOMETHING I COULDN'T KEEP DOWN...I'M LOVING IT..MI A TEK MI TIME DOA MY GOSH ...THANK YOU ALL FOR EVERY WORD OF PRAYER AND GOOD THOUGHTS..MI LOVE OONUH

Great news, Kimmy.

My wish is that the rest of your pregnancy goes very quick and smoothly.

Kimmy I hope you continue to feel great!!

I am sick again in the 3rd trimester. I think I caught the flu. They sent me home from work. I am waiting for the results on a blood test. They should be in a few hours. There was a couple out breaks of fifths disease at my work. I am thinking I don't have it. I heard you could loss your baby if you get it before 20 weeks pregnant. So I thank the Lord that I am in the third trimester.

Hope you feel better soon.

[Shemmy 4]

Ditto post.

Edited March 5, 2008 by sjb1221

[Jengles 0]

all i did was go to lunch and you all chat up two more pages,

Look what you started .. and you mean you went to lunch

Yuh now I love mi belly, we need to have a class on how jengles should not sitdown to a meal that has 3 starches and no protein.

[brownnskinn 0]

That was over the top, Tre. I think I would do the same thing you did in that situation.

I don't think it is disrespectful if done with class and not so in your face. Andre always tells me I flirt with both men and women at restaurants and by my comments and smile end up with a better table and better service.

haha, I flirt with women too! I guess thats why I say its really just playful and not sexual at all.

Ok that is good that we clarified. When I think of flirty I think of sexual and teasing and inappropriate if you are in a committed relationship. I get what you mean though...just wouldn't put the term flirty to it...more overly nice, super friendly etc.

Yeah, I think flirting has different levels, but I mean it in the sense of playfulness, not like a sexual scanvenger, haha. I think when it gets to the latter, there's a bit more than flirting expected to come out of the situation.

Exactly what I am saying. The intent behind it is what defines it for me.

Pardon mi...mi might too kuntri fi dis...How do you FLIRT with class in front of your SO? Please, enlighten me or elobratishhh fi mi.

My neighbor (and our landlord) came outside the other night when we were sitting out there. I said to him, "nice haircut. Makes you look so boyishly handsome." Flirty. Absolutely no intent behind it.

plus i think it all boils down to honesty and putting everything out in the open. If i talk to a guy friend, i'll just mention it in passing. just a one liner I spoke to such and such today. no need to get all into the conversation. but it's out there. I think secrets are what tear down relationships

Agreed..I had a junior high school sweethart email me.A few weeks ago. I haven't actully seen him since high school when I left my home town. I talked with this man for hours...for two-three days this man called me just catching up., stuff like do you remember when I pushed you down on the kiddy walk kinda stuff) I felt kinda weard talkin to him for long, so I mentioned it to my hubby and he said, so he's your junior high school " friend" (actually we go back as far as elem. school) I said yes... he never mentioned it agian. Our conversation was harmless but I didn't feel right until I mentioned it to my hubby.

[Marlita 0]

Pardon mi...mi might too kuntri fi dis...How do you FLIRT with class in front of your SO? Please, enlighten me or elobratishhh fi mi.

DWL.... ...I don't know. I know how to flirt when he's not around always playful and never any intent...unless I need help with a tire, or some bags or some tile or something. Hubby get all kinds of stuff for free...I know he flirts his self up on some stuff.

woo hoo, dis a how mi flirt....mi seh mi pimp miself out fi di free tings dem. haha

[Jengles 0]

The thing I am trying to say is there is no going back. If a man cheats on me, he better be willing to move forward. I have never, nor will I ever take a cheater back. It is my one rule I have never, nor will I ever go back on.

So, no, the answer is that it is not hard to stick to a rule you make if you really believe in that rule.

In a marriage, or any relationship for that matter, there are always grey areas to compromise on. However, I believe cheating breaks ALL the rules. I never compromise on this issue.

Just to play devils advocate here....what if you found out your partner cheated say, a year ago? You just find out, would you leave him now, or forgive what he did a year ago? Also, what if this same situation had children involved, meaning you have a young child between the 2 of you?

Yes, one of us would have to go. There are not "what ifs" in this one for me. If he cheats....at any point during our relationship.....and I find out about it, it's over. I believe in this issue with everything I have. There is no gray area here. I make it very clear from the beginning of a serious relationship. If you want me, you can have only me. If you want others, then move along.

No other scenario would make a difference. I am not dependent on any man. I need my husband in many different ways but to say I am solely dependent on anyone but myself is absolutely ridiculous. I am a strong woman completely capable of taking care of myself. My husband does not complete me, nor vice versa. We compliment each other.

WOW! Well I don't think anyone questions your "independecy" JG. You make it quite clear that you can take care of yourself. However, I don't think that has anything to do with a partner that cheated a year ago.

Of course it does. If I set ground rules that say I am unbendable on this subject, why would any time period or dependents make a difference?

all i did was go to lunch and you all chat up two more pages,

uhhummm (clears throat) and who started it?

but dependents might make a difference right, if u couldn't support yourself and your kids??

[Marlita 0]

jeng, yuh meez ah crack mi up so!! Mi juss read de statement unda deh pikcha. haha....lawd dis how mi feel seh right NOW!! mek mi go tuh di batroom.

[Forever Young 1]

Gill you crack me up.

I want some cheesecake

STOP IT BROWNIE!!!!! Don't Chica...you have been doing SOOOOOOOOO well...guh brush your teeth! They say that takes the taste outta yuh mouth!

Plus how many more minutes is that on the treadmill??????

Bless,

Gill

[Jengles 0]

Pardon mi...mi might too kuntri fi dis...How do you FLIRT with class in front of your SO? Please, enlighten me or elobratishhh fi mi.

DWL.... ...I don't know. I know how to flirt when he's not around always playful and never any intent...unless I need help with a tire, or some bags or some tile or something. Hubby get all kinds of stuff for free...I know he flirts his self up on some stuff.

woo hoo, dis a how mi flirt....mi seh mi pimp miself out fi di free tings dem. haha

fi real , the man at the gas station like me, all he does is give me free soda, but mi want free gas, mi can buy a dollar soda *cha*

[clairern 0]

THEY CASHED MY CHECKS!!!!! :dance: :dance:

FINALLY dammit!!

YEAH!!! :dance:

[Jengles 0]

jeng, yuh meez ah crack mi up so!! Mi juss read de statement unda deh pikcha. haha....lawd dis how mi feel seh right NOW!! mek mi go tuh di batroom.

that's how i felt last night, plus the kids throw their toys all over the floor *cha*

[Forever Young 1]

that, they find it VERY hard to believe, but once you've been through something like that, it kind of messes with your head. But you have to realize at some point that all MEN are not the same and I love and respect my daddy and brothers very much. So my HEART has been through it.

Good for you Lawny. It's important not to carry that into your next relationship for sure.

Ditto I was carrying ALOT of my insecurities about my ex-husband into my relationship wid Ken...until Ken said one day..."Gillian, yuh a guh mek yuh hex-husband broke us hup...yuh knoa dat!" I never even thought about it like that before! Then I finally had to let go and let G-d! And realize Ken is NOT Dorian(my ex)- (Thank G-d)...and Dorian was NO KEN! I just had a DEEP DOWN FEAR and never wanted to be PLAYED out like that again. But it's true what they say...you live and learn!

Thus far, I haven't regreted(sp?) it! It is hard though to move on and forgive him and even more importantly yourself! But I had to close that door, so my Ken window would open

Bless,

Gill

[Marlita 0]

Pardon mi...mi might too kuntri fi dis...How do you FLIRT with class in front of your SO? Please, enlighten me or elobratishhh fi mi.

DWL.... ...I don't know. I know how to flirt when he's not around always playful and never any intent...unless I need help with a tire, or some bags or some tile or something. Hubby get all kinds of stuff for free...I know he flirts his self up on some stuff.

woo hoo, dis a how mi flirt....mi seh mi pimp miself out fi di free tings dem. haha

fi real , the man at the gas station like me, all he does is give me free soda, but mi want free gas, mi can buy a dollar soda *cha*

haha, this remind me of when I was little, like 7 and miy older sis11 use to pimp me out to the local corner market store clerk tuh get free pickles and cookies.....she say, "go smile at the man nah' haha, yeah we started young.