this is for girls with an american fiance

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

you're charming, really.

im glad to see that you're giving valid arguments rather than taking a personal stab at me. that shows class.

as an american woman, i wont allow myself to understand your explanation? i understand it perfectly fine. i understand that for the most part, you were not even stating your opinion…you were giving an explanation as to why the divorce rate is so high in America…you are stating that as if it is fact, and as if you have some authority on the matter.

i pointed out the parts of your comments that either don’t make logical sense or i posed questions asking you to elaborate…you failed to clarify, and you failed to answer my questions.

submissive (adj):

1. characterized by tendencies to yield to the will or authority of others

2. inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others

3. unresistingly or humbly obedient

Sounds like an ideal spouse. Might as well marry a blow up doll. Excuse me while I vomit.

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

one more thing kid brooklyn -- please define submissive for me if you think that a submissive woman is not a doormat or slave...im curious to know how you define the term to mean something positive.

Somebody who doesn't always have to be in charge, have the last word, or always be right.

That sounds more like compromise to me - something both women AND men should strive for in marriage, American or not

you are very much correct.

[Alex+R 0]

Ah the age old generalizing chauvinist vs. individual American female argument.

It's just so much easier to blame half a country for the fact that you couldn't get laid there than deal with the idea that American women might be (gasp!) differing people!

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

Ah the age old generalizing chauvinist vs. individual American female argument.

It's just so much easier to blame half a country for the fact that you couldn't get laid there than deal with the idea that American women might be (gasp!) differing people!

[Alex+R 0]

Ah the age old generalizing chauvinist vs. individual American female argument.

It's just so much easier to blame half a country for the fact that you couldn't get laid there than deal with the idea that American women might be (gasp!) differing people!

?

This happens on VJ like once every two months. Some jerks come here and start claiming American women are mean, too career-minded, fat, not interested in family, and bossy.

Then everyone with half a brain argues in opposition. Usually to no avail.

LisaD will be sorely missed for these conversations. Lisa! Come back!

[BabyBlueSusie 1]

Ah the age old generalizing chauvinist vs. individual American female argument.

It's just so much easier to blame half a country for the fact that you couldn't get laid there than deal with the idea that American women might be (gasp!) differing people!

?

This happens on VJ like once every two months. Some jerks come here and start claiming American women are mean, too career-minded, fat, not interested in family, and bossy.

Then everyone with half a brain argues in opposition. Usually to no avail.

LisaD will be sorely missed for these conversations. Lisa! Come back!

awww

i guess i must have overlooked such arguments in the past...i see it going nowhere fast though

[DeadPoolX 9]

While it's certainly nice to "get your way" sometimes, I'm sure it'd be equally nice for your partner to get "their way" too. Any relationship where one person or the other has complete control and is dominating the other has some issues in it. As rkl57 said earlier, both men and women should strive for compromise in marriage.

This means one weekend, he chooses the movie and the next weekend, she does. One night she picks the restaurant and the next night, he chooses where they eat. That sounds extremely simple (and at it's core, it is) but in practice, it can be very difficult since most people will automatically believe that they are right (who really wants to admit they're wrong?) and see that getting what they want as "fair."

One very important thing I've learned so far is that sometimes you get a lot further by relinquishing control than holding onto it. If your partner is angry and upset with you, how much fun are you going to have that evening? I can't imagine he or she would really feel like doing anything remotely entertaining or sexual if they're extremely annoyed at you. It's in your own best interest to "give a little" sometimes.

Besides, I wouldn't want a wife who was completely submissive. I'd like her to think for herself and be her own person. When I chose to marry my wife, it's because I love her and wanted to be with her; I didn't expect some servant to wait on me hand and foot. If I had wanted that, I would have hired a butler and a maid. That would've been a lot easier than going through immigration.

Edited February 29, 2008 by DeadPoolX

[Nessa 23]

Latina women are more submissive by nature, so they are a better match for the typical power-hungry American man.

generalizing much?

I don't know where you got that idea, maybe it's a spanish thing. I haven't met many women that are submissive. Maybe I always hung out with ''independent-hungry women'' who loved the fact they could work and support themselves. Yes, I've met some women that would love to have a man to pay for everything and never work a day in their lives, but that was very rare.

My worst nightmare when I came here was that my husband would have to support me for months until I could work. I still have trouble finding a job in my area, last week I accepted a job that I would never accept in case I knew I could easily find something better, but at this point, I don't know when I'll find something better, so I'll work at this brainless job that I know I'll absolutely hate just so I don't have to spend 1 more minute at home being supported by a man.

But hey, that's me. Maybe I'm different from all the other latina submissive women

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

I think most men who marry women Latina/Asia/FSU or wherever expecting they won't want to get their way/have an opinion/give input at least 50% of the time wind up disappointed.

[panamania79 2]

Ah the age old generalizing chauvinist vs. individual American female argument.

It's just so much easier to blame half a country for the fact that you couldn't get laid there than deal with the idea that American women might be (gasp!) differing people!

[B'sA 0]

Latina women are more submissive by nature, so they are a better match for the typical power-hungry American man.

generalizing much?

I don't know where you got that idea, maybe it's a spanish thing. I haven't met many women that are submissive. Maybe I always hung out with ''independent-hungry women'' who loved the fact they could work and support themselves. Yes, I've met some women that would love to have a man to pay for everything and never work a day in their lives, but that was very rare.

My worst nightmare when I came here was that my husband would have to support me for months until I could work. I still have trouble finding a job in my area, last week I accepted a job that I would never accept in case I knew I could easily find something better, but at this point, I don't know when I'll find something better, so I'll work at this brainless job that I know I'll absolutely hate just so I don't have to spend 1 more minute at home being supported by a man.

But hey, that's me. Maybe I'm different from all the other latina submissive women

As unfair as it sounds to american women, it turned out in a dispute about how foreign women suck ...

Well, to add my 3 cents- my american fiance hates the type of women that would gladly sit home and do NOTHING, the dependent type that would only expect to receive something rather than struggle for it.

That's like his worse nightmare and we have an equal relationship and it's nothing about what country i was born in and what country he was born in.

Plus,there's nothing fun in being manipulative and overcontroling...that means you can't get nothing else but a divorce in worse case, or a stupid mindless half who will never "afford" to have a "healthy" argument with you in best case.

I think this is pathetic.

[Alex+R 0]

Latina women are more submissive by nature, so they are a better match for the typical power-hungry American man.

generalizing much?

I don't know where you got that idea, maybe it's a spanish thing. I haven't met many women that are submissive. Maybe I always hung out with ''independent-hungry women'' who loved the fact they could work and support themselves. Yes, I've met some women that would love to have a man to pay for everything and never work a day in their lives, but that was very rare.

My worst nightmare when I came here was that my husband would have to support me for months until I could work. I still have trouble finding a job in my area, last week I accepted a job that I would never accept in case I knew I could easily find something better, but at this point, I don't know when I'll find something better, so I'll work at this brainless job that I know I'll absolutely hate just so I don't have to spend 1 more minute at home being supported by a man.

But hey, that's me. Maybe I'm different from all the other latina submissive women

What? I thought you accepted the job because it was Charles's will, and you submissively do what he thinks is best. Are you from South America or not?? You sound dangerously "American."

[panamania79 2]

Yes, I agree with what you said. I am an American man, and I have a foreign fiancee and we are doing the K-1 visa. I know she feels uncomfortable that people think of her as a gold digger, and that she's using me to come to the US, which couldn't be any further from the truth. Nobody has, or will in the future, disrespect her in front of me, because they know how I'll react, but I know they talk behind our backs.

American women don't like foreign women actually treating a man with respect and being good wives. They put tgem down for it. They don't want men to know what it's like to have an respectful wife. They want to be able to control men and be bitches and have all the power. Pay not attention to it, they're just angry and jealous that an American man would choose a foreigner over them.

I totally agree. The women in the U.S. are power hungry. A U.S. man matches up perfectly with a foreighn woman. They have been raised to compement each other.

[panamania79 2]

LOL. Gird your loins, you're about to get what you deserve if the right people happen to be online.

Good. I have plenty more to say about this.

Maybe the Latinas you know are submissive.

[panamania79 2]

you're charming, really.

im glad to see that you're giving valid arguments rather than taking a personal stab at me. that shows class.

as an american woman, i wont allow myself to understand your explanation? i understand it perfectly fine. i understand that for the most part, you were not even stating your opinion…you were giving an explanation as to why the divorce rate is so high in America…you are stating that as if it is fact, and as if you have some authority on the matter.

i pointed out the parts of your comments that either don’t make logical sense or i posed questions asking you to elaborate…you failed to clarify, and you failed to answer my questions.

submissive (adj):

1. characterized by tendencies to yield to the will or authority of others

2. inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others

3. unresistingly or humbly obedient

Sounds like an ideal spouse. Might as well marry a blow up doll. Excuse me while I vomit.

When the blow up doll fails,there are always those life-like,custom made dolls for $3000.00.