Memo from Mark Penn: Hillary's Path to the Nomination

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Memo from Mark Penn: Hillary's Path to the Nomination

Many of you may have lost hope in Hillary Clinton's ability to secure the nomination. Take heart. In what follows, I lay out her path to victory.

1. Hillary must find and employ a convincing argument that Wisconsin and Hawaii don't matter. This shouldn't be a problem. Hawaii is tiny, and not even a real state (its actually a volcano), and Wisconsin is in Canada.

2. Hillary must continue to emphasize a strict and exclusive dichotomy between words and ideas. History shows that words and ideas never covary. If you are good with words, it means you have no ideas. The only way to be sure that you have good ideas is if you are an entirely uninspiring speaker. This is just science.

3. Hillary should immediately launch a campaign ad accusing her opponent of actively seeking the presidency.

4. Hillary should endorse her opponent in an attempt to drive down his favorable ratings and improve John McCain's general election poll numbers against him.

5. Hillary must win Texas. However, if she doesn't, she must immediately begin to refer to it as "The Republic of Texas" and claim that it is in fact a sovereign state and thus should not count in the Democratic Primary.

6. Hillary must be nearly tied with her opponent in the pledged delegate count at the end of primary season. However, if she isn't, she must immediately feign confusion over byzantine delegate apportionment rules and challenge her opponent to additional debates.

/HUMOR

ETA: Mark Penn is her chief campaign strategist, not campaign manager. My mistake.

Edited February 19, 2008 by VJ Troll

[no name 1]

Real story:

http://blog.hillaryclinton.com/blog/main/2008/02/13/175100

[wishbone 0]

Whatever happen, let's see how her and other campaign goes on March in Pen, Ohio and Texas.

[Ban Hammer 13,355]

http://www.deletehillary.com/

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

http://www.deletehillary.com/

good idea

[Pinocchio Liberal 268]

I foresee a democrat detonation. Hillary and the Clinton machine will take the party down