Internet Love

[Perseverance 1]

I appreciate your opinion. However, please respect that I have the right to refer to other post when expressing myself. For future reference, please refer to the Terms of Service.

I have not violated TOS... you do have the right, I never said that you did not, I see no point in resurrecting dead issues, that is my opinion as you say I have a right to it. Or am I not allowed to voice my opinion?

[ForeverAmen 0]

I appreciate your opinion. However, please respect that I have the right to refer to other post when expressing myself. For future reference, please refer to the Terms of Service.

I have not violated TOS... you do have the right, I never said that you did not, I see no point in resurrecting dead issues, that is my opinion as you say I have a right to it. Or am I not allowed to voice my opinion?

Your specific comment was "that is a dead issue lets leave it that way". I have the right to address what ever matter I choose to. If you think it's a dead issue, then fine. But to tell me that it's dead and to leave it that way is not acceptable.

[Ta Ta 1]

Unbelievable !

[Ta Ta 1]

If nothing else, this thread has revealed some heavy duty realities and exposed people for what they really are behind their smug masks.

It will be remembered by all I am sure.

Peace out and love to all ...... wishing you a good live and all the best Idocare !

God bless !

[Perseverance 1]

Your specific comment was "that is a dead issue lets leave it that way". I have the right to address what ever matter I choose to. If you think it's a dead issue, then fine. But to tell me that it's dead and to leave it that way is not acceptable

Again that was not meant as an order, I see somehow you have interpreted it that way. Interesting how an underlying meaning was read into my post when there was none.

I am going to get off this crazy train, the whole thread has become a redicuous bash fest.

[ForeverAmen 0]

The one or two people who support Idocares prejudice rantings and African bashing unfortunately are misguided.

Neither do they have a clue about her behavior during her marriage. My pm was full this morning. Old VJer's have stepped forward also to enlighten

some here about her particular issues.

So you see it is not all as it seems. There is so much you don't know Boaz. Research a bit before you jump on a bandwagon, it will curl your toes !

I would really like Idocare to stop focusing on slandering a Nationality and for us to come together as a supportive group. That was my goal here.

But I will be the bigger person and step down from this back and forth circus. Just know that anytime you insult me or my SO, I will be right here

to let you know what I think of you. My high school days have been long over and I have more important things to do than respond to

venomous rantings.

How can one reason with mental illness ? One can't.

Follow your own advice and research before YOU jump on a bandwagon.

Omoba you may not believe this, but MANY, MANY, MANY people are in need of knowing what Idocare is sharing. I've said before, and I'll say it again - I agree that often times her comments may be off topic. This is wrong. But for her to start a topic, and others try to silence her is wrong.

Now ..... I don't like that you've told me to 'research a bit before you jump on a bandwagon. Well according to the TOS statement of "Make comments in a Post either direct or implied toward another member that are purposely designed to upset, antagonize, make fun of, belittle, or otherwise instigate an argument that takes away from the personal enjoyment of the Service by other users. Therefore, I have reported you. Sorry, I will not allow you to bully me as well.

Edited February 18, 2008 by Boaz

[Ta Ta 1]

Touche !

[ForeverAmen 0]

Your specific comment was "that is a dead issue lets leave it that way". I have the right to address what ever matter I choose to. If you think it's a dead issue, then fine. But to tell me that it's dead and to leave it that way is not acceptable

Again that was not meant as an order, I see somehow you have interpreted it that way. Interesting how an underlying meaning was read into my post when there was none.

I am going to get off this crazy train, the whole thread has become a redicuous bash fest.

Interesting how an underlying meaning was read into my post when there was none. - I know how you feel.

I am going to get off this crazy train, the whole thread has become a redicuous bash fest. - Thank you.

Seriously (IMO) it all boils down to respecting individuals right to an opinion. Nothing is wrong with disagreeing. But when we disagree to the point of implying that others need to stop expressing their opinion (especially when it's not off topic), and insulting others by saying to not get on a band wagon because they feel like it's only 1 or 2 people that have a different opinion is ridiculous!!

[ForeverAmen 0]

Touche !

Hmmm ..... now you know how so many others feel. They are too afraid to speak up and express themselves. Instead they result to PM's, which eventually leads to hour long phone conversation, which often leaves my heart feeling so full because people won't speak up and share what's really going on. For me it's not about bashing anyone from a particular country. Honestly - my heart is aching as I type this response. You would not believe how so many have been scammed on so many levels. And almost repeatedly I say "you need to share this with others on VJ". Although it's not my situation, I know that it does help so many others. As a matter of fact, I have a relative in a very similiar situation (I believe I posted her story a while back). It was by reading a post from Idocare (over a year ago) that I was able to help her. I am not talking deportation. Instead it helped her to know that she was not alone. Anyway - no one is trying to scare anyone out of marrying someone from another country (at least that's not my intentions). But to constantly bully, and belittle others for expressing themselves is so rude.

[idocare 3]

Actually I don't even know where anyone got this I'm bashing Nigerians. I had to go back and recheck my posts as far as I was able to go back. I didn't see any post where I was bashing Nigerians only , I don't know where others are finding their information to label me as such. I try to make it a point to speak in general because I know there are people that can get very sensitive to what words you use.

What I do know is that Marriage Fraud happens in many many countries, not just Nigeria. I don't know who first susgested that I'm a Nigerian basher, my ex-husband is from Nigeria and I did speak about him, I don't know all NIgerians to bash them all........wow

So somebody decided to type that I'm always bashing Nigerians I hope they post where they got their information from cause I'm not finding it.

But hey if it make anyone comfortable to give me that label then post misguided information what can I say.

Edited February 18, 2008 by idocare

[Ta Ta 1]

Touche !

Hmmm ..... now you know how so many others feel. They are too afraid to speak up and express themselves. Instead they result to PM's, which eventually leads to hour long phone conversation, which often leaves my heart feeling so full because people won't speak up and share what's really going on. For me it's not about bashing anyone from a particular country. Honestly - my heart is aching as I type this response. You would not believe how so many have been scammed on so many levels. And almost repeatedly I say "you need to share this with others on VJ". Although it's not my situation, I know that it does help so many others. As a matter of fact, I have a relative in a very similiar situation (I believe I posted her story a while back). It was by reading a post from Idocare (over a year ago) that I was able to help her. I am not talking deportation. Instead it helped her to know that she was not alone. Anyway - no one is trying to scare anyone out of marrying someone from another country (at least that's not my intentions). But to constantly bully, and belittle others for expressing themselves is so rude.

Boaz now that everyone seems to have calmed down I would like to add that I have said before that Idocare could be helpful

to some people. Why does it fall on deaf ears that no one here has a problem with her story..........that the sole problem

lies in her approach, style of posting and African male prejudices. Have you read this entire thread and all the responses ?

Please hear me one last time that THAT is the issue and nothing else.

Because of THOSE issues, we have adviced her to post in the effects forum, because HER APPROACH is off in the general

forum.

Now if she would soften her approach and refrain from bashing and telling us all that our own SO's will deceive us , if she just would

tell her story like anyone else here on VJ it would not have come to this.

I am for freedom of speech with responsibility and sensitivity on this site.

Tell me honestly who here needs to hear that their SO WILL deceive them ? That is what she told me.

For some reason the core intent of her posts is to not warn but to be destructive.

I want peace with everyone and am not interested in fighting here. I do not understand why the main issue keeps getting

misunderstood.

Bitterness is never helpful but erodes like a cancer. True help and concern is what we stand for, can't we at least agree on that ?

I apologize for some over the top things I have said like mentioning mental illness, that was too personal I agree.

I hope we can rest this issue and I hope Idocare will find it in her heart to soften her approach and be fair and not

bash anymore and not tell a newbie or anyone that their SO will deceive them and for sure has 2 or 3 wives. That kind of mess

is not helping.

If she would keep it to her experience it could be helpful, but she doesn't. The reason I believe is because there are things in her story she would rather they be left untold. So be it !

[*JG* 2]

Touche !

Hmmm ..... now you know how so many others feel. They are too afraid to speak up and express themselves. Instead they result to PM's, which eventually leads to hour long phone conversation, which often leaves my heart feeling so full because people won't speak up and share what's really going on. For me it's not about bashing anyone from a particular country. Honestly - my heart is aching as I type this response. You would not believe how so many have been scammed on so many levels. And almost repeatedly I say "you need to share this with others on VJ". Although it's not my situation, I know that it does help so many others. As a matter of fact, I have a relative in a very similiar situation (I believe I posted her story a while back). It was by reading a post from Idocare (over a year ago) that I was able to help her. I am not talking deportation. Instead it helped her to know that she was not alone. Anyway - no one is trying to scare anyone out of marrying someone from another country (at least that's not my intentions). But to constantly bully, and belittle others for expressing themselves is so rude.

Thank you for posting this, Boaz. Not to point fingers in this thread at all----but I do feel as you said above on many topics in many different regional forums. I've just never stated my objections as eloquently as you have above.

I agree with every word you said above.

[Ta Ta 1]

I do have a live and have to go to work. Examples of your debatable posting style were mentioned here in this thread already.

[I'm Mrs. Akindel 0]

SATAN, THE LORD REBUKE YOU AND THE BLOOD OF JESUS IS AGAINST YOU!!!!

Wow, Wow, Wow........ This is so ridiculous. I really can't believe how this forum has turned out. Yes Idocare has a right to post, respond, or whatever else she wants to do on this forum; i really don't think that is what people are disputing. I think they are saying the manner in which she is doing it is not cordial. I had a run in with her before and no it was not nice, but she had some valid points. If she want to be helpful, then she is allowed to tell her story, but when she starts generalizing people feel attacked. I think her story will speak for itself. If she is honest and tell people what happened and the mistakes she made then people will be more aware and try to avoid those mistakes at all cost. Idocare if you want to post your story, by all means go on honey. I think it will cut down on all the tension if you leave out all the other stuff that seems to attack, but of coarse its your choice. I'm not asking or demanding that you do anything other than what you deem is necessary. We should all be sticking together, but this is crazy. I shouldn't be surprised these things are happening in these last and evil days. I am going to keep this entire forum before the Lord in prayer in hopes that this will not happen again. Come on now we are better than this. The best thing for the people who can not agree to disagree is to not respond. i tried not to but this really tugged at my heart. Please be encouraged everybody and pray about everything worry about nothing. I have learned a lesson about responding to nonsense it just fuels the fire.

[Ban Hammer 13,349]

this is better than mena