I'm so sick of time differences

[Texanadian 10]

We're lucky in that regard. She's 2 hours ahead of me. She's a night owl. I start work at 5AM. So I can phone in the afternoon and she'll be just getting home from work.

[Ephesia 0]

We had a 13-hour difference between us for more than 2 years. Because of his health and slightly more demanding job, I opted to sleep the funky hours so we could chat for a few mins every morning and evening. And he would call me on my cell before he went to bed, which coincided nicely with my lunch hour at work.

Also, during that time we were still playing the online computer game we had met each other in. This meant my weekends would get completely shot to hell in terms of sleep time. I'd manage with 3-4 hours on Fri and Sat nights, wake up at 4 or 5am, meet him inside the game, and play/chat for the next 5 hours. Sometimes I'd be able to nap in the afternoons, sometimes I wouldn't be able to because my sleep pattern was royally messed up.

Mondays were the hardest for me. I'd wake up at 2am to spend time with him either in ICQ or in the computer game, and struggle to stay awake all the way till 7am before I got ready for work. Long distance and time difference forced me to learn to drink coffee. They also gave me very 'healthy' dark rings under the eyes.

It was only towards the last six months of our courtship before I took back my normal sleeping hours. By then, we had already stopped playing that computer game. We chose to e-mail most of the time, but kept with our morning/evening phone calls.

Because of this communication arrangement, we treasured every single minute of talk time. Whenever we had a quarrel or disagreement that couldn't be resolved by either party's bedtime, we'd send each other e-mails to explain our thoughts and feelings. Once in awhile he'd also sleep a little later so that we could talk longer. There was, and still is, a lot of give-and-take.

Hang in there, LisaD.

Edited February 5, 2006 by Ephesia

[aussie&princess 0]

Our time difference was 16.5 hours. For the first year and half of our relationship, I slept during the day while my kids were at school. so i coul stay up with him. and vice versa. Then once I started to work that made it tough. We had set times each day that we talked no matter what. I soooooooooooooooo hated it at times. Cause I be up and he be so tired trying to stay up to talk with me.

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Lisa - ours is also 5 hours and yeah it DOES indeed suck.

I'm 'lucky' that he works nights so I usually see (read as 'see in the 'is on the PC' sense) him when he gets home and just before he goes in to work at nights.

It's annoying when he's not workin that by the time he;s settled the kids and eaten, and is 'free' that its time for me to get tired and start typing gibberish

We don't talk much on the phone becasue when I'M free, it's too early there or people in the house are all sleeping so a call would wake them up - or its like that here and a call would wake MY kid up.

I can't say we really argue about it - (Im sagittarius and he's aqaurius - not sure if that actually makes any difference tho, lol) - cos its not something we can change. It just IS.

I think it used to be more annoying than it is now, simply because Im more used to it after all this time.

It just makes the time we DO get more 'precious' I guess.

Hang in there Lisa - it won't be this way forever.

[RichiJenny 14]

I hear you Lisa, and am in the same boat, it can become a nightmare. Time difference+tiredness= arguments....

Its not nice sometimes but I know where you're coming from 110%.

[aussiewench 9]

We don't so much argue EVER, but I do know of a few times when I have called my Hubby outside of the timeframe we have agreed on suited us both, only to hear 'what are you doing Honey, I have things to do and you are calling me before we are supposed to talk' hahahahaha So I would sulk a little and say.....ok I will hang up then NOOOOOOO dont do that he would say....You have called now, we will talk I always know that I am going to get a little grief but hey its worth it He gets over it pretty quick. The times he is moody (he's a cancerian) I just bare it as its part of him. I know it is never because of me so I dont take it to heart. One time he sent me an email after we had gotten off the phone apologising for him being such a grump and that I could either bare with him or leave him alone for a while. I sent him one back telling him 'I will stick around if thats ok'

Hope you are feeling a little better Lisa. Hows the head this morn? Drinking does always make things seem a whole lot worse, but hey we all need a stiff drink sometimes.

[arwensun1965 1]

Hi Lisa, I can totally understand where you are coming from, Jon has just gone back home and we are back to being 8 hours apart again I know it wont be for long as I will be joining him on the 1st March but we have been doing this for 3 years. Yep we have had our arguments but it is nice to make up afterwards nobody is perfeck are they lol. Hope you are feeling better (even if you have a wee headache from the wine) best wishes.

Janice

[jkb919 0]

I understand how everyone is feeling on this,

My fiance works on a cruise ship and currently he is 5 hours behind me, but as his ship cruises sometimes every night the time changes 1 hour forward or 1 hour back..I have the hardest time keeping track of what time zone he is in. Luckly I can call an 800 number for free and he has a US cell phone and he will call my phone let it ring a couple times and then hang up and I will call him back on the 800 number (saves a bunch of money)...But I work rotating day and night shifts, so we are always confused on what times to call each other...but we work it out. We usually talk 2-3 times a day...sometimes his ship is in a US port so he can use the cell phone and call me whenever.

But I know the time difference thing can be very hard.

[CarolineM 0]

Yeah sadly, I know exactly what you mean. 16 hours for us! When we do get to talk we are both so tired!

It totally sucks.

40 days left.

[Fandango 1,439]

I swear...you guys rock! Thank you all so much...I don't feel so alone anymore...my friends here don't really understand, so it's wonderful to have ppl who do. I am very fortunate I found this place!

Anyways, the head ain't so great today I don't really drink much, so the few glasses of wine really have thrown me for a loop today. My stomach is churning like crazy

I am normally a 'get on with it' girl & always looking for the positives. But last night I think I just needed to wallow in my own self-pity Every now and again, I don't want to be so strong & a good cry does wonders.

You know the old saying 'i once felt bad for myself that I had no shoes, until I saw a man who had no feet'? Here I am crying about a 5 hour difference & some of you are well beyond that! I don't think I could cope at all, but you guys do, and I think I'm going to keep that in mind for the next time I feel sorry for myself.

Haven't really spoken to the man today...he called for a brief sec before going to work...and later on, I have a superbowl party to go to when he'll be home. I've decided to go to the party & not constantly live my life around my boo's schedule. I don't think I can do it so much anymore, as the isolation after he goes to bed is just too much lately. I am by nature a very social person. I think that's where I'm going wrong....not focusing on just enjoying myself. I wouldn't expect him to live around my schedule (all work and no play, ya know?) so why I'm living solely around his is anyone's guess.

Stupid fights will happen, and there will be lonely moments, but I've committed myself to just living each day the best I can, and not to focus on the big picture, because things always have a way of sorting itself out. I have been feeling sooo much stress ever since the engagement...finding out all this bs we have to go thru with immigration, dealing with him moving here, worrying how he'll acclimate, etc. It's been worrying the ####### outta me. I never realized there'd be so much involved! My mom has a saying...'trust in Jesus' and that's what I'm going to do!

Seriously tho...you guys are so awesome & have really made me feel so much better...thanks again!

[slim 1,530]

Me and the S/O usually only talk by phone once a week. We save up all the stuff we want to talk about and put it all into one conversation. No time to fight!

We e-mail a couple of times too, and that helps.

Next time you talk, just remember that you're fortunate to be talking, and talking so often. So don't fight!

[Fandango 1,439]

Ok well I just wanted you all to know that all is perfect!

Sometimes I can really be a real DRAMA queen...I really think the distance is just completely screwing with my head this time

Anyways, thx again for all your support!

[pax 0]

2 months and 11 days until the 5-hour time difference gets gone for good. I'm ready.

[tom&tata 2]

We are now doing the 12 hrs difference, we did the 5/6 hrs difference. Both sucks

But hey, I consider us lucky that we get to talk a lot even with the time difference. Phone bills are sometimes crazy and sleeping habbit is messed up sometimes, but it will all go away....sooon

[MichelleandCraig 1]

I feel for all of you. Ours was six at the time...Craig would go to bed about six pm and get up 1am his time for the day so we could talk. I had to be to work 6:30 am but would often talk until midnight/one or two my time...On Fridays I would stay up til about noon my time when I could, and sometimes he came on earlier if he couldn't sleep...we were both sleep deprived but like you guys, thought it was worth it!!! Hope you are all with your honeys soon and it's a thing of the past!