Husband MAY have another child...

[athena_ny 1]

I think you should be honest with your husband. Let him get to the bottom of the entire situation. He should call his nephew and then the ex-girlfriend. If it goes any further, they should have a DNA test.

Maybe she did have an abortion, maybe she was never pregnant. Maybe it is another man's child. I can't see a woman wanting to raise a child alone.

Buh? No one wants to, but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen EVERY day.

[I love Ashraf 0]

If there are no secrets don't start now

[MandR 0]

Tracy...... you definately have to sit and tell him what you found out. Sorry you have to be going through this.....

Please let us know how it all turn out..................

[Nessa 23]

I'd tell him about the phone call, but that's me.

Maybe it's not even his child. You shouldn't worry before knowing for sure.

[Fandango 1,439]

I see this as a no brainer....you should absolutely tell him. In fact, tbh, you have no real right to withold this info from him. Imagine 15 years from now that this child shows up at your doorstep and then somehow it comes out that you knew summat was up. Or imagine if his nephew tells your husband, and then he finds out that you knew....I can see that as the devastating potential of this situation, but it will be devastating on your marriage as it may make your husband lose all faith and trust in you.

I can't see how this could 'devastate' him if he was upset she had an abortion in the first place. Wouldn't he be happy to know that the baby wasn't aborted? Obviously, this complicates matters all around, but it's not an impossible situation to handle should the child be his.

Are you afraid he'd want to go back to Peru?

[Fandango 1,439]

I wanted to edit to add, but it's too late....

If I were you, I think D might actually leave me if he found out that VJ knew before he did...

Good luck with this situation!!!! I hope it all works out!

[*JG* 2]

Yes, tell him. He will be really angry with you later if he finds out you did not tell him.

Then, I suggest a DNA test to see if that child is really his or not.

[almaty 19]

Whoa.

You should tell him. Your husband's nephew should've told HIM, not you.

Good luck with it all.

i agree with you on this sister dev..the nephew should have told his uncle and not you....

[TracyLuis 0]

Of course I knew I had to tell him...and I did. I did so, in fact, knowing that his ex didn't ever want him to find out. So whoever's right or place it was to tell him is not really the point. When you get information like this--at 7 months pregnant--you tend to freak out a little. Or a lot. I desperately needed guidance.

But the bottom line is that I love my husband and I trust him, and I would never be able to withhold information of that gravity from him. He can read me like a book, anyway. I even called him up and asked him to leave work early so that we could discuss this.

I guess it's more devastating to me than anyone else. Selfishly speaking.

No, he won't leave. He didn't want to be with her in the first place. But naturally, he wants the child to know that his father didn't intentionally disappear from his life (yes...it's a little boy). First things first, however, he will attempt to contact the mother and see about some paternity testing.

The nephew was able to obtain a photo of the child from the ex's sister. He's a beautiful little boy...

that looks just like my husband as a child.

Our heads are spinning, but we'll get through this.

[Krikit 1,164]

Our heads are spinning, but we'll get through this.

Yes you will. There are worse things in life than finding out you have a beautiful little son, stepson, and stepbrother for your child. That must have been a difficult discussion to have with your husband. You're a good person, Tracy. I wish you all the best.

Edited January 23, 2008 by Krikit

[Sister Fracas 5]

Good luck to you through this trying time.

[almaty 19]

sadly, things like this happen in life.....it was in his past...i hope he tries and contact the ex gf...if it is his, he needs to help support the youngster...

[Emancipation 2]

I'd tell him about the phone call, but that's me.

Maybe it's not even his child. You shouldn't worry before knowing for sure.

I'm with you Nessa.. there's an assumption being made here that this child IS hers.. she could be an au pair.. or it be a neice or nephew.. of course your hubby has a right to know.. but be careful before jumping to the assumption that it's his.. Talk it out with him...

[Mrs.J06 4]

Sounds like you handled this very well, Tracy.

Good luck to you!

[TracyLuis 0]

sadly, things like this happen in life.....it was in his past...i hope he tries and contact the ex gf...if it is his, he needs to help support the youngster...

He would obviously help. But his ex never even wanted him to know. So he'll do what's right...to the extent that he is allowed.