Changing your name to your father in law first name

[NancyB 0]

Hello Ladies,

I would just like to know if you ladies knew that you were changing your last names to your FATHER IN LAWS first name?

I hope NO Muslim sister is doing this, because we know the reasons. How many people have ever explain to none Muslim women how naming is done? why we don't change our names to our husbands, and how important this is to documenting children lineage.

For example: Tina will marry Mohammed Sayed, and Mohammed Sayed means Mohammed son of Sayed. This is how people will know who is the father of Mohammed. However when you get married and change your names you are not know as Mrs Mohammed but Mrs Sayed(wife of Mohammed's father). The Imam is always surprise that the men don't explain this to their wives. Some people don't drop their maiden names but add their husbands father first name, which this is still incorrect. For example Tina White Sayed, which will now mean Tina White is either the daughter of Sayed or still Mrs Tina White-Sayed is wife of Sayed, lol!

People will do what they want to do, but as the Imam said; some of us will stay married forever and some of us will not, so what will you do change your name every time?

I love this so much as its fun to go back even sometimes centuries in explaining your children lineage. Okay well just wanted to know how many people were aware of this, and how many people didn't change their names, or would change it back or will never change it after getting this information.

I've been married before to a Middle Easterner and never changed my name and it was never a problem.

[MrsAmera 41]

I'm afraid this depends on the region. My last name is Mouttaki (my husband's last name) and that is not his father's first name. I'm pretty sure the same holds true through most of West and Northern African Muslim nations (aside from Egypt) as well as the Asiatic Muslims. Maybe do a little more reasearch as this is not the case everywhere and really is true only for the handful or so of levantine countries. Changing of the last name is a preferance and quite honestly I'm proud to share the name of my husband and children. Good thing we live in the US where we have the choice. As a Muslim I've not experienced any backlash against this and his family was really touched actually that I wanted to carry the same name.

Edited January 20, 2008 by MrsAmera

[RAKASA 0]

I'm afraid this depends on the region. My last name is Mouttaki (my husband's last name) and that is not his father's first name. I'm pretty sure the same holds true through most of West and Northern African Muslim nations (aside from Egypt) as well as the Asiatic Muslims. Maybe do a little more reasearch as this is not the case everywhere and really is true only for the handful or so of levantine countries. Changing of the last name is a preferance and quite honestly I'm proud to share the name of my husband and children. Good thing we live in the US where we have the choice. As a Muslim I've not experienced any backlash against this and his family was really touched actually that I wanted to carry the same name.

I have to agree w/ Amera. This is also not the case in my husband's family. They all share a same last name which is not the father's first name. I chose to take this name also b/c we wanted to share a family name as well. So, I now go by Noura Maiden name Married name. However, for the ease of my business, I still use only my maiden name there. I figured my clients had already been through enough change w/ my maiden name, former married name, back to maiden name. I love sharing my husband's name.

[ak3 0]

I dont see anything wrong with that and I did it but Im Christian. My last name will be my husbands 2nd name (his dads first name) and that will also be his last name ...everyone can do as they see fit

[Aymerlu 3]

This is not the case in my husbands family either. I too love having my husbands last name.

[NancyB 0]

LOL!!! Yes, it's true a lot of people don't use their fathers name as a first name, but for the ones who do. I just knew someone was going to say "Thank God we live in America, lol!!! What does that have to do with family lineage?

Me stating this is that some women love to know their husbands lineage, and would love this for their children. It's our duties as Muslim to make these women feel comfortable and to teach them our cultures and let them know how things are done. America has nothing to do with it. I love hearing the little children telling me their Great Great Great fathers name. I guess I just love family.

I love to see Mohamed Mohamed Ali Mohammed as a name, lol! A lot of people ask why does he have two first names or why all the Mohammed's? and I was so excited to be able to keep this for my children also.

For the women that didn't know, I'm sharing. For the ones who don't care or before people make a big deal out of this it was not meant for that. Just sharing.

I actually think it's neat!!!! I actually changed my name to Nancy William Brown and my dad was so happy and excited about that.

[maggieNomar 0]

My husband and I are like Noura. We share both of our last names. Any children we have will also. Interesting information though Nancy. I had heard that muslim women don't take the name of their husband, but I could not be married and keep just my maiden name. Just wouldn't feel married, but that is my hang up. I know it works for others.

[melly 0]

Hello Ladies,

I would just like to know if you ladies knew that you were changing your last names to your FATHER IN LAWS first name?

I hope NO Muslim sister is doing this, because we know the reasons. How many people have ever explain to none Muslim women how naming is done? why we don't change our names to our husbands, and how important this is to documenting children lineage.

For example: Tina will marry Mohammed Sayed, and Mohammed Sayed means Mohammed son of Sayed. This is how people will know who is the father of Mohammed. However when you get married and change your names you are not know as Mrs Mohammed but Mrs Sayed(wife of Mohammed's father). The Imam is always surprise that the men don't explain this to their wives. Some people don't drop their maiden names but add their husbands father first name, which this is still incorrect. For example Tina White Sayed, which will now mean Tina White is either the daughter of Sayed or still Mrs Tina White-Sayed is wife of Sayed, lol!

People will do what they want to do, but as the Imam said; some of us will stay married forever and some of us will not, so what will you do change your name every time?

I love this so much as its fun to go back even sometimes centuries in explaining your children lineage. Okay well just wanted to know how many people were aware of this, and how many people didn't change their names, or would change it back or will never change it after getting this information.

I've been married before to a Middle Easterner and never changed my name and it was never a problem.

Actually, as far as I know, if you took your husband's last name, that would not be your father in laws first name, but your grandfather in law's first name.

My husband's middle name is his father's first name, and my husband's last name is his grandfather's first name.

[MrsAmera 41]

I'm usually not the most patriotic person you'll meet I simply state that to reinforce the notion of choice. You did post

"I would just like to know if you ladies knew that you were changing your last names to your FATHER IN LAWS first name?

I hope NO Muslim sister is doing this, because we know the reasons. How many people have ever explain to none Muslim women how naming is done? why we don't change our names to our husbands, and how important this is to documenting children lineage."

Hmmm pretty blatant attack for someone who really didn't do her research on naming traditions in so much that she claims that all Muslims name in such a way. It might be the case for your SO but it's not as common in the rest of the Muslim world. Great that you enjoy the lineage aspect but there's plenty of us that know our lineage and our husband's and not due to the fact we have 5 names detailing the last 5 relatives... It's really more of an Arab tradition than a truly Islamic one, as many Arab Christians in Syria, Lebanon etc follow the same naming pattern.

Wikipedia (while not the most academic) has some info on this in other areas outside the Levant:

Syria retains a heavy Turkish influence, which is reflected in commonly found names of Turkish and Kurdish origin; e.g. Adib al-Shishakli.

Maghribi names are quite distinctive due to heavy Berber (Tamazigh) and French influences.

In certain Southeast Asian countries like Malaysia, Indonesia, and Singapore, the name Mohammed or Muhammad (often abbreviated to Mohd.) commonly precedes a male Muslim's given name, followed by the word "bin" and his father's name, for example Muhammad Amin bin Hashim. If the person has performed the Hajj, the honorific "Haji" would be prefixed to his name, for example Haji Muhammad Amin bin Hashim, or even Haji Muhammad Amin bin Haji Hashim. Persons claiming descent from Prophet Muhammad may carry the title "Syed" or "Sheikh" ("Sharifah" or "Siti" for females) before their name and a family name may follow the personal name, for example Syed Muhammad Amin al-Habshi bin Syed Hashim al-Habshi.

In Afghanistan and, persons claiming to be related to the prophet are called Sayeds, and all the males in the family carry the title of Mir, rather than the last name of Hashimi or Hashem. People belonging to this group will have either the last name Hashimi or have the title Mir in front of their names, but not both. An example of an Afghan who claims to trace their lineage to the prophet will be Mir Abdul Rahman, Mir being the title linking them to the Prophet Muhammad but not being a part of their first name, which would be Abdul Rahman. Afghan women who are Sayeds carry no title in front of their names; some carry the last name Hashimi, which indicates their lineage and is kept by many even after marriage, as in Islam women are not required to take their husband's last name.

In Iran also, persons claiming to be related to the prophet have Sayed in their name, often as a prefix.

Many Jews of Temani, Mizrahi and Arabicized Sephardi extraction often maintain Arab surnames and adopt Arab names common to Arab Jews, even in the West; e.g. Paula Abdul and Loolwa Khazzoom.

In Western China, officials will, when spelling a native name in Chinese characters, sometimes represent "Muhammad" by the Chinese character 馬/马 mǎ.[citation needed]

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

Hi Nancy! Hope this helps.
Our SO MENA name game and name change

[allousa 1]

My husband's last name actually comes from the village that they all come from in Palestine. Their lineage goes back several hundreds of years. I have yet to change my name because of all the volunteer work that I've done...most people know me by my name I had before we were married. But now that I no longer do all of that since we've had our son, I'm thinking of taking my husband's name as a way of further uniting our family. But it's never been that big of a deal to my husband. He's always told me that is mainly a Christian thing and that's not done where he's from. It just so happens that mostly people from the village would marry each other and their names are usually the same!

To each his own. No one should pass judgment on anyone whether they do this or not.

[Nasturtium 500]

Isn't the Islamic point on this just to not mess up lineage? Where name changing at marriage is common it doesn't screw up lineage because we have a cultural account for it. I didn't change my name because I happen to like my name and I'm not interested in having a different name. My husband is levantine and tribal, so he has a tribe name along with the 60,000+ other people in his tribe. It's a place designation anyway, so it's not like it harkens back to some man... it does back to a place (like any of the Germanic von- names.... Martin von Ausburg, for example, would be a place name indicating background-- like it's Martin from the town of Ausburg. Same deal with some of the Jordanian tribal names-- they are X al-X, which happens to be a place and not just a name). So when people asked me in Jordan who i was married to, i'd say Al-tribalname, but then when they asked me my name it would be Julianna Maidenname. That's pretty much how I was referred to as well-- by tribal affiliation first, then by name-- but that's how they all were referring to each other.. it's just that as a tribal blood member you also happen to carry that affiliation as your surname.

[Nasturtium 500]

It just so happens that mostly people from the village would marry each other and their names are usually the same!

Same thing for my husband's area. They mostly marry cousins in his area as well, so you're pretty much assured you're going to have the same last name as it is. he refers to me as his last name, but if he writes it down for someone (in other words something that's beyond informal), he uses my own.

Name changing is a cultural thing, not a religious (or christian) thing. It depends on what is important to that particular culture. In the ME, geneology is more important as an identifier-- who are you son and grandson, etc of... We're familiar with this if you ever read those long and boring geneologies in Bible. In other places, it was more important to show a transfer of authority-- so you change your name based on who you are affiliated with. If your husband is now your legal guardian,. you change your name to his. When you are born, you have the family name because your father is your legal authority. So it just depends on what the naming signified in the culture. In many European (but not all) traditions, it signified authority and NOT lineage. People were more concerned as to who had legal control over you.

[LaL 418]

Actually, as far as I know, if you took your husband's last name, that would not be your father in laws first name, but your grandfather in law's first name.

My husband's middle name is his father's first name, and my husband's last name is his grandfather's first name.

I took my husband's GREAT grandfather's first name as my last name. His passport has a 4 name string, and all paperwork ever done for him here in the west has used the 4th name. He is also known with that last name here.

And yes, of course I knew the history of the name I was taking when I took it.

[Cheryl & Medo 3]

I took my husbands last name (the family name) It is not his dads first name nor his grandfathers first name. And doing this has made my husband so happy. And I just wouldn't feel right not taking my husbands family name.