heartbroken

[marinemom546 0]

I am the us citizen and married a mexican citizen over 3 years ago. I have paid all the immigration fees and just filed the I-751. over the last year I feel like he has changed towards me and I feel i was taken by a very good actor, we are still together but the romantic man I married si not the man who came to live with me. he has become extremely controling talks about americans in a very negative way. I feel so betrayed right now, and need him for paying our bills. He hates my adult children and has told me as much. I am currently out of work and am soon to have a second surgery on my shoulder. I know that we will be splitting up in 6 months.

has any other us citizens been betrayed. i fell hard for him and am on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

one heartbroken marinemom

[one...two...tree 2,762]

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

Edited January 15, 2008 by Mister Fancypants

[Enlighten one :) 5]

Hello Marinemom,

I am so sadden to hear your news. Yes this has happened to several women in the African Sub Sahara portal and have read it many places. The control and abuse starts as soon as they feel their journey has completed. Its hard to accept that someone can't appreciate you at least for the financial obligation you have made to their Visa process. He picks fight to eliminate the guilty feelings of making the move to leave. If you two are fighting the conflict is used to hide the real purpose of his departure.

You are in my prayers.

I am the us citizen and married a mexican citizen over 3 years ago. I have paid all the immigration fees and just filed the I-751. over the last year I feel like he has changed towards me and I feel i was taken by a very good actor, we are still together but the romantic man I married si not the man who came to live with me. he has become extremely controling talks about americans in a very negative way. I feel so betrayed right now, and need him for paying our bills. He hates my adult children and has told me as much. I am currently out of work and am soon to have a second surgery on my shoulder. I know that we will be splitting up in 6 months.

has any other us citizens been betrayed. i fell hard for him and am on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

one heartbroken marinemom

[marinemom546 0]

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

i don't like conflict and it seems he looks for problems. he alway has some sort of negative comment about everything isay or do. it has gotten to the point that i either am afraid to talk to him or i just don't say anything to him. he has always told me to just tello him to leave and that he doesn't need his green card. now that i am not working he is really mean to me and controling. he went to mexico for the holidays and i told him to weigh his happiness and not to come back if he is happier in mexico. he came back last week and has been mean and indifferrent. i had to ask my parents for money for groceries because he bought groceries only for himself and not for me. he also showed me a new pair of boots he got in mexico and told me his girlfriend bought them for him, he then patted me on the back and said thanks for the green card. I think 4 years ago he was trolling for someone to use and he found me, a nice person he could charm.

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

Just wanted to say I'm so sorry

Find comfort in your family and friends.

[Nagishkaw 510]

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

i don't like conflict and it seems he looks for problems. he alway has some sort of negative comment about everything isay or do. it has gotten to the point that i either am afraid to talk to him or i just don't say anything to him. he has always told me to just tello him to leave and that he doesn't need his green card. now that i am not working he is really mean to me and controling. he went to mexico for the holidays and i told him to weigh his happiness and not to come back if he is happier in mexico. he came back last week and has been mean and indifferrent. i had to ask my parents for money for groceries because he bought groceries only for himself and not for me.charm. he also showed me a new pair of boots he got in mexico and told me his girlfriend bought them for him, he then patted me on the back and said thanks for the green card. I think 4 years ago he was trolling for someone to use and he found me, a nice person he could

That is beyond cruel and nothing but pure arrogance on his part . My heart is sad for you and I am so sorry to read that your husband treats you this way.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

i don't like conflict and it seems he looks for problems. he alway has some sort of negative comment about everything isay or do. it has gotten to the point that i either am afraid to talk to him or i just don't say anything to him. he has always told me to just tello him to leave and that he doesn't need his green card. now that i am not working he is really mean to me and controling. he went to mexico for the holidays and i told him to weigh his happiness and not to come back if he is happier in mexico. he came back last week and has been mean and indifferrent. i had to ask my parents for money for groceries because he bought groceries only for himself and not for me. he also showed me a new pair of boots he got in mexico and told me his girlfriend bought them for him, he then patted me on the back and said thanks for the green card. I think 4 years ago he was trolling for someone to use and he found me, a nice person he could charm.

If you just recently filed the joint I-751, and really feel as if you have been deceived, then request that your endorsement on the joint petition be withdrawn, but do it quickly.

[~*Dorothy*~ 2]

I'm sorry that you are going thru hell with this man - I hope that you will get out of this unhealthy relationship as soon as it's possible and if you can withdraw your joint petition as Mermaid is suggesting you should - this man doesn't deserve to stay in this country...

Take care of yourself and be safe

[zqt3344 21]

Love the pictures on your profile, very nice!

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

[Jengles 0]

I'm sorry for the heartache you're going through, and no offense, but what does the fact that he immigrated here having anything to do with the trouble you're going through

?

i don't like conflict and it seems he looks for problems. he alway has some sort of negative comment about everything isay or do. it has gotten to the point that i either am afraid to talk to him or i just don't say anything to him. he has always told me to just tello him to leave and that he doesn't need his green card. now that i am not working he is really mean to me and controling. he went to mexico for the holidays and i told him to weigh his happiness and not to come back if he is happier in mexico. he came back last week and has been mean and indifferrent. i had to ask my parents for money for groceries because he bought groceries only for himself and not for me. he also showed me a new pair of boots he got in mexico and told me his girlfriend bought them for him, he then patted me on the back and said thanks for the green card. I think 4 years ago he was trolling for someone to use and he found me, a nice person he could charm.

If you just recently filed the joint I-751, and really feel as if you have been deceived, then request that your endorsement on the joint petition be withdrawn, but do it quickly.

EXACTLY!!!!

[JJWashington 0]

Ditto

[bora bora 1]

I'm sorry to hear this . I agree with those that tell you to withdraw your endorsement.

[Sonshyne 2]

I am so sorry that you are going thru this, my heart goes out to you

[tito 1]

In Spanish, the "term of art" would be, "justificacion", or a state of affairs that makes life so miserable, the ends justify the means. In other words, I have no idea about the past, but at this point in time, the person just does not want to be with you for whatever reason, and that's a shame, but rather than take responsibility for his actions, decisions, motives, and circumstances, he goes about creating the misery to justify a departure from the relationship.

But since you've been together 3 years, it's not really clear that his motive was simply to get a green card...and the nasty things he might be saying now about it could certainly be viewed as part of the "justificacion".

Truly sorry about your situation...I hope it will improve soon. But your counterpart is certainly no prince, and one might say he's quite the coward for going about things as he is rather than being honest. That's called, "descarado".

[JVKn'CVO 11]

I'm very sorry to hear about your situation

Saludos,

Caro