~July 2007 K-1 Filers~

[teachmehistory 0]

well guys, looks like we are moving right along =]

if you check out the updated timeline, you will see why

well it seems that adriano is thinking of heading back to ny since he has had no luck finding work here, and feels very isolated since he can't speak to anyone...so i am supporting him with his decision even though it makes me sad to see him go...i figure that he has sacrificed so much for me by coming here (to america, and then to the middle of nowhere lol) that i can at least be understanding and let him take care of himself a lil...plus, it will allow me to be much more efficient with my studies, because i wont have to worry about rushing home to my husband who is bored out of his mind...looks like we will be back to the long distance thing, although ny-indiana isn't quite as bad as usa-italy/albania...he will be staying with my sister until he gets a place of his own and going back to his old job there, which he loved...im trying to be optimistic, but of course its hard...i cant help but think that this time it will be more difficult in a way, because we have lived together now for 6 months, whereas before we had never really lived together...i just have to tell myself that we got through it before, and we can do it again

Hey Susie,

I am soooooo sorry to here Adriano is struggling with the move to Ind. I have thought about you often as you are one of the only of us (that has post here regularly anyway -granted I do read more than I post!!!!) that has a non-english speaking spouse and I can't imagine the added stress that would bring to an already trying process. I know that Matthew has been frustrated from time to time and he only has an accent to contend with! I was a bit heartbroken for you reading that he might move back to NY as we all know how hard it is to be apart. Just wanted to throw my (probably unwanted) 2 cents in! We have just gotten the letter for the greencard interview and the check list of stuff to bring - and the majority of it centers on proving that we actually live together. Is it possible for Adriano to stay in Ind at least until you guys have the greencard? We have to bring evidence like joint bank statements, joint utility bills, lease/housing agreement, credit cards, loans, etc. in both names to document that we do live together. Also the interview questions posted in the AOS guides all focus on proving that we share a household. I would hate for him to go too soon and risk a red-flag for the greencard approval by being in NY. I was also reading through the 'lifting conditions' guide for the next step two years down the road and it does suggest having continued evidence that you live together during the 2 year conditional greencard period - such as statements dated all throughout the 2 years of the evidence above.

I think you are so brave to consider doing the long distance thing again for the next 4-5 years so that you both can do what you need to do and support each other and be happy in both the short and long run. I just wanted to encourage you to research it a bit so that you don't risk jeopardizing his immigration status. Of course you guys have to do what works for you and lots of couples successfully live apart in the short term for work and school and such, but the immigration issue makes it a bit trickier for couples like all of us!

I hope you two are doing well and you are keeping your chin up! I also hope you know this advice is meant in a purely supportive and caring way!

Take care,

Sara

[rae_and_scott 1]

I was a bit heartbroken for you reading that he might move back to NY as we all know how hard it is to be apart.

I felt the same way. I also think that Sara gave you some very sound advice & suggestions.

But you do sound like you are looking at the whole situation really positively, and I'm happy to hear that.

[Jeraly 4]

I speak to Scott every day (and email too) and he is doing ok. He got laid off last week and he says that he's started looking for jobs in Charlotte, so things could be looking up soon.

Right now I feel that I need to tread very lightly when it comes to Scott and let him make decisions in his own time rather than rush him. He did tell me before I left that he doesn't consider the marriage completely over at the moment, he just needs some time to sort himself out. He's told me every day since I left that he's really missing me - hopefully we'll be able to work things out before too long.

I went to my new apartment today and it's lovely - I can't wait to move in now. Looks like the movers are arriving on Friday so I can chill out for a few days.

Ooooh - well you must post pics when you move in so we can see! Now I want to come visit you!!! Heheh - I have never been to SC so it would be good fun

Nice to hear that Scott is looking for jobs in Charlotte - I just really hope that this whole situation has kinda snapped him... not out of it, but made him realise that his actions could have meant losing you. I know he has a lot on his plate right now but hopefully it will inspire him to seek any help he needs so things will work out best for everyone involved

Those are the same positive thoughts that I am trying to keep in my head right now. Thanks for the encouragement Aly!

I am looking into ways that would allow me to conduct research in NY, and I think it might be possible since my research is concerned with language, and particularly comparing how the brain functions with regard to one's native language. I don't know if that makes sense to other people, but NY would essentially provide a great outlet in order to cover a range of different native language populations. I am also in the process of working out some details of teaching a seminar in NY during my spring break in March. It wouldn't allow me much time to see Adriano, because I would be very busy, but it's better than nothing. And yes, we are most likely going to move back to NY once I get my PhD, so hopefully he will have some things set up for us there. I will finish school in either 4 or 5 years, at which time I will promptly high tail it out of Indiana lol. I hope to get a job at a university in NY (Columbia, pleaseeeeeeee lol). We would consider moving back to Italy though, if the opportunity should arise, but that is still up in the air.

Wish us luck!

Sounds like you had the same ideas as me - it's great that you have looked into it all so you can spend as much time in NY as possible

In other news, we have picked up a few more halloween things which is great - I am really looking forward to the party!! And I currently have Daisy on my lap which is a HUGE step forward but because I am sat on the computer chair which is where she has taken to sitting, the kitten is trying to play with my butt by sneaking around and pouncing. Sometimes he gets my butt and if he is round the front or sides he gets Daisy who miaows and swats him - so I am caught in the middle! Fun fun - think I might be shredded by the time Jeremy comes home!!

[weedebz 0]

Aly...I have just aquired kitty number 2. Well pick him up on Monday. Long story about how but it involves a 4 month old playful kitten, 3 week old twins and a terrifed mother. Free kitty and free food for a month. Now I need to think of a name for a totally black male kitten. He's very sleek and shiny.

[tucson_chick 0]

hi guys!

anybody else watching the gloryful president of this country giving his speach to the nation?

@ susie: I'm so sorry that adriano is considering moving to NY. It must be heartbreaking for you that he is so unhappy in indiana! i'm not sure what to recommend, but the long-distance thing seems very very hard to me! is there any possibility to change universities/ jobs and move somewhere else where both of you are happy?

i'm not sure if the GC interview might be an issue, you don't have to tell them at the interview that you aren't living together. they didn't ask us any questions, they only wanted to see documents that are in both names. but every interview is different.

@ gillian: i'm so happy for you that your appartment is nice and that scott might move to charlotte!!!

@ debz: so jealous, i want a kitten!!!

@ all: i am starting to realize that i might never be able to call this my home and we are considering moving to germany next year. i feel guilty for feeling this way, but the last couple of days i was on the verge of tears 24/7 and i am so homesick that i am afraid of flying home for christmas because i know that i will not get back on the plane.

[rae_and_scott 1]

@ all: i am starting to realize that i might never be able to call this my home and we are considering moving to germany next year. i feel guilty for feeling this way, but the last couple of days i was on the verge of tears 24/7 and i am so homesick that i am afraid of flying home for christmas because i know that i will not get back on the plane.

Agnes, don't feel guilty. You cannot help the way that you feel. If Eric is willing to move to Germany, then that is wonderful. I don't know if you remember me talking about my plans to return to Canada next year with Scott. Everyone on the boards, with good reason, tells me I should wait until Scott is a citizen to make the move back, to give us the most options. That isn't in the cards for us, but I completely understand why people advise it. Likewise, have you thought about this? I know it's an additional couple of years that you would have to stay in the States... but it could be worth it. It just really opens up your options for the future. Well, whatever you do, you know you have friends here on VJ and you can cry to us. I know it's hard to be homesick, and I can't imagine feeling the greater gap (physically and culturally) of being across an ocean.

In our news, Scott's GC has been approved. I was not expecting this so quickly, but we got the email saying the welcome letter has been sent. Scott is so funny. He totally doesn't pay attention to details (if you could call this a detail...) and has pretty much let me handle the whole process with our lawyer. So after I read the email from CRIS and told him, he said to me, "Wow, really? I didn't even know I was getting a green card."

:lol:

[Jeraly 4]

Aly...I have just aquired kitty number 2. Well pick him up on Monday. Long story about how but it involves a 4 month old playful kitten, 3 week old twins and a terrifed mother. Free kitty and free food for a month. Now I need to think of a name for a totally black male kitten. He's very sleek and shiny.

Oh cute!! We can be in the two-kitty club!! Will defo need to see pics Riley is currently chewing on our palm - he is really boisterous this morning!!!

@ all: i am starting to realize that i might never be able to call this my home and we are considering moving to germany next year. i feel guilty for feeling this way, but the last couple of days i was on the verge of tears 24/7 and i am so homesick that i am afraid of flying home for christmas because i know that i will not get back on the plane.

Aww hun - didn't you want to try moving to a different State sometime next year? Will miss you if you go home!!! I did think you would find it hard when you go home for Christmas, but if you make plans for your family to come out and visit you again then maybe it will give you something to look forward to. I have my mum's trip in April to look forward to although it does seem like forever right now And this will be my first Christmas without my family as well so that is also hard as we normally have about 20 of us. I've found pretty cheap tickets but it is unlikely we will be able to afford it unless I get a good job as soon as my EAD arrives

Maybe a new neighbourhood with new people and surroundings will be better? I know where you are right now is a little out of the way(!!!!!) so I don't know if you ever see or speak to your "neighbours" but maybe a closer-knit community will help you settle a bit more. Not only that but moving back East will be closer to home as well Shorter plane flights - woohoo!!!

In our news, Scott's GC has been approved. I was not expecting this so quickly, but we got the email saying the welcome letter has been sent. Scott is so funny. He totally doesn't pay attention to details (if you could call this a detail...) and has pretty much let me handle the whole process with our lawyer. So after I read the email from CRIS and told him, he said to me, "Wow, really? I didn't even know I was getting a green card."

:lol:

Oh that is hilarious!! Bless him

[*julez* 124]

Congrats, rae, on Scott's unexpected Green Card!

[rae_and_scott 1]

Thanks Julez! And I probably don't need to say this, but I love the continuation of the muppet theme of your avatar.

[*julez* 124]

Thanks Julez! And I probably don't need to say this, but I love the continuation of the muppet theme of your avatar.

Haha...thanks...I'm all pimped out now.

[weedebz 0]

Rae and Scott...Congrats!!

Julez...I'm loving the muppets too. When I was in a band back in Scotland we would walk on stage to muppet theme. I love Animal.

All... I need a name for a totally black, bright green eyed, very sleek kitten (boy). So far favourites are Poe (edgar Allan poe) and Obsidian.

[*julez* 124]

Rae and Scott...Congrats!!

Julez...I'm loving the muppets too. When I was in a band back in Scotland we would walk on stage to muppet theme. I love Animal.

All... I need a name for a totally black, bright green eyed, very sleek kitten (boy). So far favourites are Poe (edgar Allan poe) and Obsidian.

Animal is one of my favorite muppets, too. I also like Gonzo, Beaker and the Swedish Chef.

OMG, reading that back to myself, i realize that I need to get a life!

with regard to your kitty, I'd name him Seamus. I think its a great name for a black cat or dog. But with your choices, I'd go for Poe, just for the sake of simplicity. Obsidian is cool, but a mouthful and what would you call him for short?

[Jeraly 4]

Obby?!

How about Raven? It has the Poe reference and is better than Edgar

[rae_and_scott 1]

Ooh, I like Poe, and Raven even more b/c he's black. I like names from literature (my kitty's name is Puck). How about Raskolnikov? I konw, too many syllables.

A friend of mine came up with a good cat name: Chairman Meow.

I love Beaker. I saw someone on Halloween with the most fabulous Beaker costume. The Swedish Chef is a fave too.

[English Muffin 59]

It's a bit obvious but I like the name Salem for black cats.