Just Turkish

[Der Bücherwurm 1]

Yes, I have to agree with cami on how Sex ed is a sorry topic there!

I also had my monthly friend come during one of my visits to Turkey to see my husband (when we were first engaged) and whispered to him that I just got my period. So we go out to pick up some products and as soon as we get to the checkout point he tries to hide the package and after the cashier ring it up and he then quickly bags it so no one sees it, geez!

Even in a casual conversation, when asking about a pregnant friend's sex of the baby will make him react and say "don't say sex in public!" Ohhh pleaseee!

Yet, it's ok for women to go topless at their beach resorts like the one in Bodrum, Turkey!!! sorry, but there is way too many hypocritical double standards if you ask me!

I'm sure I'll get reamed for saying so but that's pretty typical in muslim culture though. I've lived in Germany, Norway, Dubai and now Turkey so I'm familiar with the way muslim immigrants are in Europe and how muslims in the GCC are and am now learning how Turks are in their own country. When I lived in Europe I would quite often hear muslim men talk about what whores western women are. Yet at night they would wander the streets whistling at girls and go into to bars looking for a white girl to screw. The muslim girls would look down their noses at western women because they had their brothers coming home telling them how slutty western girls are and how much better the girls from back home are. Then you go to Dubai and you find out there are underground clubs for picking up women, polygamy is the norm as is visiting as many 'temporary wives' as you can afford. Once when Hoom and I were having dinner here with some of his Iranian acquaintances the women started talking about cheating and how it's worse when a woman cheats than when a man cheats. Hoom was the only one that said it's equally bad when either cheats. Generally speaking, I'd say muslim men are far sluttier than any western men or women they just make themselves hypocrites by trying to hide/disguise it. I always thought christians from the deep south were hypocrites when I was a teenager. I was disappointed to discover they're not the worst offenders.

At least Turks try to keep their government secular though. They have Arabs and Iranians beat in that department.

[ErikaAndHamit 73]

I totally agree with you both camistanbul and hoomsfuturewife from what I have seen/learned so far. It is sad and it took about another month after this before he understood everything completely. I was shocked then, but I can laugh about it now. I am currently teaching him about PMS and it's implications for him.

Turkey is so different from America.

Edited February 15, 2009 by ErikaAndHamit

[tanyakaraman 0]

Tanya that is sooo very funny what you said about your kids asking him which one of his legs is broken!

I am the same way with Coskun whenever he asks for something that is within his reach and I am 10 feet away!

Really now, some of these men are such spoiled "mama's boys" and we wives have to teach them better!

It's true...sometimes I am amazed when he will ask someone to walk all the way from another room to fetch him something that is just barely out of his reach! Or he will forget something in walking from one room to another and ask *someone else* to go back and get it for him! Sometimes I look at him like...

He often gets my kids to help him straighten his closet or clean up a mess that he made, but they don't seem to mind too much any more. He does give them money for helping him so of course that's always a big motivator LOL, but I have to admit, he really gets them working together better than I do...it's one of his gifts I guess...

[tanyakaraman 0]

I totally agree with you both camistanbul and hoomsfuturewife from what I have seen/learned so far. It is sad and it took about another month after this before he understood everything completely. I was shocked then, but I can laugh about it now. I am currently teaching him about PMS and it's implications for him.

Turkey is so different from America.

PMS....Erika you're so funny. That man of yours is getting quite an education...his poor head must be spinning!

[tanyakaraman 0]

Yes, I have to agree with cami on how Sex ed is a sorry topic there!

I also had my monthly friend come during one of my visits to Turkey to see my husband (when we were first engaged) and whispered to him that I just got my period. So we go out to pick up some products and as soon as we get to the checkout point he tries to hide the package and after the cashier ring it up and he then quickly bags it so no one sees it, geez!

Even in a casual conversation, when asking about a pregnant friend's sex of the baby will make him react and say "don't say sex in public!" Ohhh pleaseee!

Yet, it's ok for women to go topless at their beach resorts like the one in Bodrum, Turkey!!! sorry, but there is way too many hypocritical double standards if you ask me!

I'm sure I'll get reamed for saying so but that's pretty typical in muslim culture though. I've lived in Germany, Norway, Dubai and now Turkey so I'm familiar with the way muslim immigrants are in Europe and how muslims in the GCC are and am now learning how Turks are in their own country. When I lived in Europe I would quite often hear muslim men talk about what whores western women are. Yet at night they would wander the streets whistling at girls and go into to bars looking for a white girl to screw. The muslim girls would look down their noses at western women because they had their brothers coming home telling them how slutty western girls are and how much better the girls from back home are. Then you go to Dubai and you find out there are underground clubs for picking up women, polygamy is the norm as is visiting as many 'temporary wives' as you can afford. Once when Hoom and I were having dinner here with some of his Iranian acquaintances the women started talking about cheating and how it's worse when a woman cheats than when a man cheats. Hoom was the only one that said it's equally bad when either cheats. Generally speaking, I'd say muslim men are far sluttier than any western men or women they just make themselves hypocrites by trying to hide/disguise it. I always thought christians from the deep south were hypocrites when I was a teenager. I was disappointed to discover they're not the worst offenders.

At least Turks try to keep their government secular though. They have Arabs and Iranians beat in that department.

I agree with this 100%...about the Muslim men and western women. The first time I was in Istanbul (this was when I was still single, before I met Ozzy), MANY a man I came in contact with seemed to think that the only thing preventing me from having sex with him was the mere existence of my pants. I had a shopkeeper in the Grand bazaar try to unzip me under the pretense of "measuring my waist" and he was genuinely shocked and disappointed when I got angry and walked out. If they see you are anything vaguely resembling blond and foreign, they see you as an easy mark, and they are after it. There is a huge double standard.

And you know, Erika, come to think of it, this may be why Hamit "escorts" you everywhere in Turkey, because he knows how these men are. Come to think of it, Ozzy does the same thing when we are in Turkey. Since I met him, I have never walked anywhere alone there....it really does border on a safety issue sometimes....

[JULIAFERNO 0]

OMG I have a funny, embarrassing, surprising and risque story to share Please don't get mad if it's TMI-if you're sensitve to bodily fluids......DO NOT READ any further

Ok....here goes a slice of culture shock.....

When I went to Turkey last year on one of our visits and my aunt Flo decided to show up mid-deed, he thought I was injured and he was very worried and insisted on my being "inspected" downstairs. A few moments later he says: "oh, it's ok, no problem" as in "no serious injuries"...lol

I then ran for our English-Turkish dictionary and pointed to the word "menstruation" and he nodded as if he knew to save face, but then had the most confused look on his face I started laughing. I still wonder what else "menstruation" could mean in Turkish?

I tried to show him tampons and pads-he says "wow big" to the cardboard applicator type I handed him did he think it was a "toy"?...... he shrugs when I whip out the pads and is now looking thoroughly perplexed and anxious-maybe he thought in addition to his fiancee having something terribly wrong with her-I had a #######?

Now I was grasping at strings...."you know: 5 days???!! All women have this problem every month?...if no come this kirmizi normal then bebek come" yes I used broken kindergarten English for easier understanding

He still doesnt know and I am running out of ideas, but I was DETERMINED to give him a crash course on the birds and the beesif we were to ever work out and he not think I was a freak.....

Again in broken juvenile English: "Mother/father no tell how pee-pee work? No tell how bebek come? Tashak you know what for? Woman every month cok kirmizi come?" He still says no-I look up several fertility related vocabulary...nope. I am thinking wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww the US and Turkey are VERY different.

Now I try meataphors and humor: "yumurta" (egg)...later this bebek if man woman do sport and no "jordan" use (condom as he prounounced it) aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh understood

He says: "In Turkey family no speak this topic." He did, however know what and where sperm do/are. It took about an hour before I made it clear I wasn't a born again virgin or injured or in urgent need to see a doctor!

He is now well-educated on the birds and the bees...flowers....trees

This is actually really sad to me. I know you wrote this as a kind of funny topic, but it's just sad since I know so many Turkish

girls who have had multiple abortions and I have had to literally search for tampons in Istanbul (it's easier now than when

I first lived there)... because everyone associates tampons with loose women. Ugh. :-( Sex ed is certainly a sorry topic there....

*sigh*

When I moved to Turkey I brought a huge stash of tampons with me because I knew I wouldn't be able to find them there. Onur had never seen one before. He thinks they are the most peculiar little contraptions. He is really quite fascinated with them. Sometimes when I get into one of my feminist tirades while in Turkey I'll start asking him "So, what? Even married women aren't allowed to use tampons? I mean, obviously if you've already had kids your hymen has already been broken - so what's the big deal!? HUH?!" Poor guy. He usually responds, "Do you think I made this rule?" You should have seen me the first day we were walking around Kirikkale and I saw a nice park with benches that I wanted to walk through. "Sorry, but you can't go in there" Onur told me. "Ummm...why not?" I asked, truly puzzled. "It's for men only." I flipped out, swore that I hated Turkey, etc. We laugh about it now...but I was seriously pissed. Hence the reasons he is moving HERE

[JULIAFERNO 0]

OMG I have a funny, embarrassing, surprising and risque story to share Please don't get mad if it's TMI-if you're sensitve to bodily fluids......DO NOT READ any further

Ok....here goes a slice of culture shock.....

When I went to Turkey last year on one of our visits and my aunt Flo decided to show up mid-deed, he thought I was injured and he was very worried and insisted on my being "inspected" downstairs. A few moments later he says: "oh, it's ok, no problem" as in "no serious injuries"...lol

I then ran for our English-Turkish dictionary and pointed to the word "menstruation" and he nodded as if he knew to save face, but then had the most confused look on his face I started laughing. I still wonder what else "menstruation" could mean in Turkish?

I tried to show him tampons and pads-he says "wow big" to the cardboard applicator type I handed him did he think it was a "toy"?...... he shrugs when I whip out the pads and is now looking thoroughly perplexed and anxious-maybe he thought in addition to his fiancee having something terribly wrong with her-I had a #######?

Now I was grasping at strings...."you know: 5 days???!! All women have this problem every month?...if no come this kirmizi normal then bebek come" yes I used broken kindergarten English for easier understanding

He still doesnt know and I am running out of ideas, but I was DETERMINED to give him a crash course on the birds and the beesif we were to ever work out and he not think I was a freak.....

Again in broken juvenile English: "Mother/father no tell how pee-pee work? No tell how bebek come? Tashak you know what for? Woman every month cok kirmizi come?" He still says no-I look up several fertility related vocabulary...nope. I am thinking wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww the US and Turkey are VERY different.

Now I try meataphors and humor: "yumurta" (egg)...later this bebek if man woman do sport and no "jordan" use (condom as he prounounced it) aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh understood

He says: "In Turkey family no speak this topic." He did, however know what and where sperm do/are. It took about an hour before I made it clear I wasn't a born again virgin or injured or in urgent need to see a doctor!

He is now well-educated on the birds and the bees...flowers....trees

This is actually really sad to me. I know you wrote this as a kind of funny topic, but it's just sad since I know so many Turkish

girls who have had multiple abortions and I have had to literally search for tampons in Istanbul (it's easier now than when

I first lived there)... because everyone associates tampons with loose women. Ugh. :-( Sex ed is certainly a sorry topic there....

*sigh*

When I moved to Turkey I brought a huge stash of tampons with me because I knew I wouldn't be able to find them there. Onur had never seen one before. He thinks they are the most peculiar little contraptions. He is really quite fascinated with them. Sometimes when I get into one of my feminist tirades while in Turkey I'll start asking him "So, what? Even married women aren't allowed to use tampons? I mean, obviously if you've already had kids your hymen has already been broken - so what's the big deal!? HUH?!" Poor guy. He usually responds, "Do you think I made this rule?" You should have seen me the first day we were walking around Kirikkale and I saw a nice park with benches that I wanted to walk through. "Sorry, but you can't go in there" Onur told me. "Ummm...why not?" I asked, truly puzzled. "It's for men only." I flipped out, swore that I hated Turkey, etc. We laugh about it now...but I was seriously pissed. Hence the reasons he is moving HERE

P.S. Onur wants a Turkish style toilet here in the U.S. (i.e. hole in the ground). I don't get it. He prefers it.

[tanyakaraman 0]

OMG I have a funny, embarrassing, surprising and risque story to share Please don't get mad if it's TMI-if you're sensitve to bodily fluids......DO NOT READ any further

Ok....here goes a slice of culture shock.....

When I went to Turkey last year on one of our visits and my aunt Flo decided to show up mid-deed, he thought I was injured and he was very worried and insisted on my being "inspected" downstairs. A few moments later he says: "oh, it's ok, no problem" as in "no serious injuries"...lol

I then ran for our English-Turkish dictionary and pointed to the word "menstruation" and he nodded as if he knew to save face, but then had the most confused look on his face I started laughing. I still wonder what else "menstruation" could mean in Turkish?

I tried to show him tampons and pads-he says "wow big" to the cardboard applicator type I handed him did he think it was a "toy"?...... he shrugs when I whip out the pads and is now looking thoroughly perplexed and anxious-maybe he thought in addition to his fiancee having something terribly wrong with her-I had a #######?

Now I was grasping at strings...."you know: 5 days???!! All women have this problem every month?...if no come this kirmizi normal then bebek come" yes I used broken kindergarten English for easier understanding

He still doesnt know and I am running out of ideas, but I was DETERMINED to give him a crash course on the birds and the beesif we were to ever work out and he not think I was a freak.....

Again in broken juvenile English: "Mother/father no tell how pee-pee work? No tell how bebek come? Tashak you know what for? Woman every month cok kirmizi come?" He still says no-I look up several fertility related vocabulary...nope. I am thinking wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww the US and Turkey are VERY different.

Now I try meataphors and humor: "yumurta" (egg)...later this bebek if man woman do sport and no "jordan" use (condom as he prounounced it) aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh understood

He says: "In Turkey family no speak this topic." He did, however know what and where sperm do/are. It took about an hour before I made it clear I wasn't a born again virgin or injured or in urgent need to see a doctor!

He is now well-educated on the birds and the bees...flowers....trees

This is actually really sad to me. I know you wrote this as a kind of funny topic, but it's just sad since I know so many Turkish

girls who have had multiple abortions and I have had to literally search for tampons in Istanbul (it's easier now than when

I first lived there)... because everyone associates tampons with loose women. Ugh. :-( Sex ed is certainly a sorry topic there....

*sigh*

When I moved to Turkey I brought a huge stash of tampons with me because I knew I wouldn't be able to find them there. Onur had never seen one before. He thinks they are the most peculiar little contraptions. He is really quite fascinated with them. Sometimes when I get into one of my feminist tirades while in Turkey I'll start asking him "So, what? Even married women aren't allowed to use tampons? I mean, obviously if you've already had kids your hymen has already been broken - so what's the big deal!? HUH?!" Poor guy. He usually responds, "Do you think I made this rule?" You should have seen me the first day we were walking around Kirikkale and I saw a nice park with benches that I wanted to walk through. "Sorry, but you can't go in there" Onur told me. "Ummm...why not?" I asked, truly puzzled. "It's for men only." I flipped out, swore that I hated Turkey, etc. We laugh about it now...but I was seriously pissed. Hence the reasons he is moving HERE

P.S. Onur wants a Turkish style toilet here in the U.S. (i.e. hole in the ground). I don't get it. He prefers it.

Ozzy prefers them too...says it "helps everything come out" LOL

[Mina76 0]

OMG I have a funny, embarrassing, surprising and risque story to share Please don't get mad if it's TMI-if you're sensitve to bodily fluids......DO NOT READ any further

Ok....here goes a slice of culture shock.....

When I went to Turkey last year on one of our visits and my aunt Flo decided to show up mid-deed, he thought I was injured and he was very worried and insisted on my being "inspected" downstairs. A few moments later he says: "oh, it's ok, no problem" as in "no serious injuries"...lol

I then ran for our English-Turkish dictionary and pointed to the word "menstruation" and he nodded as if he knew to save face, but then had the most confused look on his face I started laughing. I still wonder what else "menstruation" could mean in Turkish?

I tried to show him tampons and pads-he says "wow big" to the cardboard applicator type I handed him did he think it was a "toy"?...... he shrugs when I whip out the pads and is now looking thoroughly perplexed and anxious-maybe he thought in addition to his fiancee having something terribly wrong with her-I had a #######?

Now I was grasping at strings...."you know: 5 days???!! All women have this problem every month?...if no come this kirmizi normal then bebek come" yes I used broken kindergarten English for easier understanding

He still doesnt know and I am running out of ideas, but I was DETERMINED to give him a crash course on the birds and the beesif we were to ever work out and he not think I was a freak.....

Again in broken juvenile English: "Mother/father no tell how pee-pee work? No tell how bebek come? Tashak you know what for? Woman every month cok kirmizi come?" He still says no-I look up several fertility related vocabulary...nope. I am thinking wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww the US and Turkey are VERY different.

Now I try meataphors and humor: "yumurta" (egg)...later this bebek if man woman do sport and no "jordan" use (condom as he prounounced it) aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh understood

He says: "In Turkey family no speak this topic." He did, however know what and where sperm do/are. It took about an hour before I made it clear I wasn't a born again virgin or injured or in urgent need to see a doctor!

He is now well-educated on the birds and the bees...flowers....trees

This is actually really sad to me. I know you wrote this as a kind of funny topic, but it's just sad since I know so many Turkish

girls who have had multiple abortions and I have had to literally search for tampons in Istanbul (it's easier now than when

I first lived there)... because everyone associates tampons with loose women. Ugh. :-( Sex ed is certainly a sorry topic there....

*sigh*

When I moved to Turkey I brought a huge stash of tampons with me because I knew I wouldn't be able to find them there. Onur had never seen one before. He thinks they are the most peculiar little contraptions. He is really quite fascinated with them. Sometimes when I get into one of my feminist tirades while in Turkey I'll start asking him "So, what? Even married women aren't allowed to use tampons? I mean, obviously if you've already had kids your hymen has already been broken - so what's the big deal!? HUH?!" Poor guy. He usually responds, "Do you think I made this rule?" You should have seen me the first day we were walking around Kirikkale and I saw a nice park with benches that I wanted to walk through. "Sorry, but you can't go in there" Onur told me. "Ummm...why not?" I asked, truly puzzled. "It's for men only." I flipped out, swore that I hated Turkey, etc. We laugh about it now...but I was seriously pissed. Hence the reasons he is moving HERE

P.S. Onur wants a Turkish style toilet here in the U.S. (i.e. hole in the ground). I don't get it. He prefers it.

Ozzy prefers them too...says it "helps everything come out" LOL

OMG, I can't believe this topic went on from menstruation to tampons to toilets!!!

Tanya, helps everything come out......that's a good one!

I mean it's almost as funny as my husband saying about someone that doesn't seem to him as being intelligent, he goes "he looks like a stupid!" I laughed everytime he said it

Edited February 16, 2009 by Mina76

[JULIAFERNO 0]

OMG, I can't believe this topic went on from menstruation to tampons to toilets!!!

Tanya, helps everything come out......that's a good one!

I mean it's almost as funny as my husband saying about someone that doesn't seem to him as being intelligent, he goes "he looks like a stupid!" I laughed everytime he said it

Haha! I just laughed out loud, Mina. I can't help but laugh when Onur uses obscenities in English...although he does the same when I say them in Turkish. Actually, his whole family cracks up telling me to say it again. One time I was baking cookies while we were living with his parents. We were arguing about something (I was being pouty about something)...he was sitting in the tv room with his dad watching a soccer match and I stormed in, threw some walnuts at him and said "NO COOKIES FOR YOU!" and stormed out. Onur and his dad couldn't stop laughing and his dad still talks about it to this day. Funny thing is, I think his family loved me all the more after that...I guess they saw my true colors

[Der Bücherwurm 1]

Lol. PMS and toilets that are more like holes in the ground. Boy, was it a shocker for me the first time I walked in on one of these holes behind a stall with no TP or spray hose, no way to flush and only a cup under a faucet. I was really confused/disgusted by the 'measuring' cup. I walked out and decided to hold it til we got home.

In Dubai they have proper toilets with a spray hose attached to the wall for you to wash your bum with and TP for you to dry with.

In Iran they use the hole in the floor toilets like in Turkey. Only old people and the handicapped have the proper toilets installed in their homes.

Once we make it to the states and have a place of our own I will look into installing one of those spray hoses like they use in Dubai for Hoom.

Edited February 16, 2009 by Hoomsfuturewife

[miamiwife 0]

I have enjoyed reading all of your stories so much! Too funny Yes, I have taken pictures of the Turkish toilets to show people back here in the States because they don't know what I am talking about. I have been going to Turkey for years (my father is Turkish) and you have seen slowly the modern toilet begin to pop up here and there. I would think that as soon as someone tried a modern toilet they would think, god, why have we been torturing ourselves for years? But, I have even been to a brand new, modern, governement building in Turkey and you go to the bathroom and it is the HOLE! What? I asked my husband what he thought about the Turkish toilet, he said well it is natural. I said, it is natural for people to go to the bathroom like animals do? Okay. But then again, we have a restaurant named Hooters, what is that about?

[tanyakaraman 0]

Lol. PMS and toilets that are more like holes in the ground. Boy, was it a shocker for me the first time I walked in on one of these holes behind a stall with no TP or spray hose, no way to flush and only a cup under a faucet. I was really confused/disgusted by the 'measuring' cup. I walked out and decided to hold it til we got home.

In Dubai they have proper toilets with a spray hose attached to the wall for you to wash your bum with and TP for you to dry with.

In Iran they use the hole in the floor toilets like in Turkey. Only old people and the handicapped have the proper toilets installed in their homes.

Once we make it to the states and have a place of our own I will look into installing one of those spray hoses like they use in Dubai for Hoom.

I was sooo confused too...the first time I had to use one (on a college trip....imagine if you will a group of 10 or so college girls all having to go badly and the only available facilities was a hole in the floor! None of us had any idea what to do but we were all laughing hysterically...) I think I actually peed in the measuring cup thing and then dumped it down the hole LOL. I didn't know what to do and there were no instructions! I had been forewarned about the no toilet paper thing and had brought my own wipes. I had no idea what to make of the measuring cup and faucet though!!

[ErikaAndHamit 73]

OMG this has turned hilarious.....poop! pee! bodily fluids!...........oh my!

[awaterlily 0]

LOL, if you got the x-tra $, why not!

P.S. Onur wants a Turkish style toilet here in the U.S. (i.e. hole in the ground). I don't get it. He prefers it.

I didn't see any of them in the cities or Bodrum when over there. However, when we went on outings and picnics outside of the city limits they were aplenty in the villages and places like those cafeteria style restaurants that are off the major highways.

I googled the Turkish 'WC' and found lots of pics and a wiki about the 'squat' toilet and it's history, here's a pic for you all to enjoy!:

wiki article here

One thing (of many) I found interesting, and totally off toilet topic, is hardly anyone has or uses a clothes dryer I ironed EVERYTHING so clothes wouldn't feel stiff.

That said, Turks do have the funkiest clothes drying racks I had ever seen and can hold a large load. (I have found one at IKEA for $20 if anyone is interested in buying one) LOL

Here's a pic:

Edited February 17, 2009 by awaterlily