Playing with the idea of leaving.....

[Nutty 2]

I am in a quandry....

I am considering quitting my job just so I can meet with my husband. The problem is this place only allows one week vacation and that really isn't enough time to see my husband.

I just can't take the fact I may be in AP hell and be waiting for months. Even though the officers at the Embassy said three times to my husband, "it will only take one month." My mom is going to be a joint sponsor on the case.

since this was one other thing they said we needed.

Has anyone else considered just leaving????

Maybe unlike a lot of you....I have no real desire to live in USA and if my boss wouldn't consider giving me more than a week off (without pay of course), I have no problems giving notice.

[Jenn! 918]

Your job's not very important to you and you already have a cosponsor. Seems like you already have your answer.

[Nagishkaw 510]

I agree with Jenn!, it sounds like you have the answer. Sometimes you need to do what you feel you should. I think you are feeling you should.

[allousa 1]

I feel your pain, Nutty and understand your predicament. It's hard to not let your heart rule in situations like this.

First off, I would greatly consider the consequences of quiting your job. Is it a job that is easily replaced and with the same income level that you were at before? If you quit, could that negatively reflect future employment? How severely will your finances be affected should you chose to quit working for an extended time? And, is there anyone else that depends on your income besides yourself.

I'm sure you know by now how long Hicham and I were in AP, unfortunately, I have such a good paying job that I have many years invested in that it has never been an option of me leaving. I also have a young child and a house that greatly depend on my income.

Of course it's your decision to make, but having walked that path of AP hell, it's hard to not let your heart rule. There is an end to AP, I promise.

Best of luck to you and I hope that it all works out for you.

[mawilson 2,133]

Maybe unlike a lot of you....I have no real desire to live in USA and if my boss wouldn't consider giving me more than a week off (without pay of course), I have no problems giving notice.

Good. Just stay clear of Natanz and Esfahan and you'll be ok.

[Nutty 2]

Maybe unlike a lot of you....I have no real desire to live in USA and if my boss wouldn't consider giving me more than a week off (without pay of course), I have no problems giving notice.

Good. Just stay clear of Natanz and Esfahan and you'll be ok.

Funny you say that I was in Esfahan last September....Is that a place that would be bombed by the US????

I have to tell my husband not to travel there.

I feel your pain, Nutty and understand your predicament. It's hard to not let your heart rule in situations like this.

First off, I would greatly consider the consequences of quiting your job. Is it a job that is easily replaced and with the same income level that you were at before? If you quit, could that negatively reflect future employment? How severely will your finances be affected should you chose to quit working for an extended time? And, is there anyone else that depends on your income besides yourself.

I'm sure you know by now how long Hicham and I were in AP, unfortunately, I have such a good paying job that I have many years invested in that it has never been an option of me leaving. I also have a young child and a house that greatly depend on my income.

Of course it's your decision to make, but having walked that path of AP hell, it's hard to not let your heart rule. There is an end to AP, I promise.

Best of luck to you and I hope that it all works out for you.

I make $12.75 an hour as a office worker. No kids and no mortgage. But no money either. So going would be using every last $$$ I have.

[Nutty 2]

I feel your pain, Nutty and understand your predicament. It's hard to not let your heart rule in situations like this.

First off, I would greatly consider the consequences of quiting your job. Is it a job that is easily replaced and with the same income level that you were at before? If you quit, could that negatively reflect future employment? How severely will your finances be affected should you chose to quit working for an extended time? And, is there anyone else that depends on your income besides yourself.

I'm sure you know by now how long Hicham and I were in AP, unfortunately, I have such a good paying job that I have many years invested in that it has never been an option of me leaving. I also have a young child and a house that greatly depend on my income.

Of course it's your decision to make, but having walked that path of AP hell, it's hard to not let your heart rule. There is an end to AP, I promise.

Best of luck to you and I hope that it all works out for you.

By the way....you truly have been through a great struggle from looking at your time line. I wish the best for you too.

Nutty

[mawilson 2,133]

Funny you say that I was in Esfahan last September....Is that a place that would be bombed by the US????

It's possible. Esfahan is said to be the primary location of the Iranian nuclear weapons program.

[♥JP♥ 5]

I make $12.75 an hour as a office worker. No kids and no mortgage. But no money either. So going would be using every last $$$ I have.

I think this answers your question. If you are bringing this man here and you don't have a job or money, how will you live? I missed my fiance terribly while we were apart for 18 months and we didn't see each other either but I felt it was more important to put my life in order here so that we could live comfortably when he arrived and it did pay off.

[Nutty 2]

I make $12.75 an hour as a office worker. No kids and no mortgage. But no money either. So going would be using every last $$$ I have.

I think this answers your question. If you are bringing this man here and you don't have a job or money, how will you live? I missed my fiance terribly while we were apart for 18 months and we didn't see each other either but I felt it was more important to put my life in order here so that we could live comfortably when he arrived and it did pay off.

Well, I would still have some small savings..But yes, it would be a couple of thousand dollars....

I am going nuts basically. Haunting the Visa Journey website and triple checking the embassy webpage.

And I hate being back in the States and prefer to be back in India.

Edited December 28, 2007 by Nutty

[♥JP♥ 5]

Ok well if you prefer to live in another country why dont you cancel your petition? Or do you just want to move temporarily until you get the visa? I understand that you have no kids and no mortgage but I'm sure you have some kind of financial responsibility and now that you are married and your husband will be making the journey here you bear the responsibility of providing for him too.

I think its natural to ponder upon the idea you came up with but its not realistic and not the mature thing to do.

[sarah and hicham 3]

oops.

Edited December 28, 2007 by sarah and hicham

[sarah and hicham 3]

I guess I never understood the "follow your heart no matter what" sensation that is constantly all over this board.

No, I didn't have to wait a long time for my fiance to come, but I can tell you that never in a million years would I quit my job and pack my life into a suitcase to spend a few months with my fiance knowing that upon my return I would have nothing. Sometimes you have to let your brain lead the way and leave your heart out of it. I know that some members pack up and move and that's great if they have the means to but if I were in your situation I just woulnd't do it. That's just me.

[Nutty 2]

Ok well if you prefer to live in another country why dont you cancel your petition? Or do you just want to move temporarily until you get the visa? I understand that you have no kids and no mortgage but I'm sure you have some kind of financial responsibility and now that you are married and your husband will be making the journey here you bear the responsibility of providing for him too.

I think its natural to ponder upon the idea you came up with but its not realistic and not the mature thing to do.

Well, the original problem was he could not get a long term visa for India (I have a ten year visa for India). I could not get a long term visa for Iran (they only gave me a three month tourist visa and then asked for my passport).

So we decided USA was our third alternative to be together.

I returned to USA to establish domicile and start the process. My mother in the US, but no other family members. Adjusting to life in the US is very hard. Very fast pace of life and my health is declining here (I was actually healthier in India).

Of course I bear the responsibility for taking care of my husband when he comes, but on the flip side, he is an engineer and this is a highly desired skill in the US. So I do not think he will be unemployed for very long.

[~~~water~~~ 0]

If you can pull it off, replace your job when you return with the same and you have family to lean on without being a burden upon return I say take advantage of the opportunity, it will give you a better understanding of his world and that will be important here.