Marrying young vs. the rest of VJ.

[Aymerlu 3]

I'm 20 and my personal belief comes from an arab perspective and background if you and your spouse were pure before marriage and didnt have other relationships before each other and married out of true love its going to last forever. My grandparents are foreign of course they stay together but American grandparents who are in their 70's they usually stayed together because they were all high school/ college sweet hearts. My husband said no man can accept another kid from another man and his wife. He can learn to love the kid but it wont be the same as his own. Also your wife or husband having ties with another beofre you you'll just think about them being together its like a used car nobody treasures or respects an old car like a new one. probably not the best simile but its so true. I personally feel that. Theres a certain level of respect thats shared if you've experienced everything together vs you already been divorced married again kids, etc etc.. But everyone is ENTITLED TO LOVE! no matter what their past holds everyone has their life.

nevermind. I need to find "bite my tongue" thread

ok....can't bite my tongue no longer. Must be nice to have a husband that views women as used cars. I hope and pray he doesn't put the same title on you one day. Just because you were raised a certain way does not make one immune to what may happen later in life.

[almaty 19]

I'm 20 and my personal belief comes from an arab perspective and background if you and your spouse were pure before marriage and didnt have other relationships before each other and married out of true love its going to last forever. My grandparents are foreign of course they stay together but American grandparents who are in their 70's they usually stayed together because they were all high school/ college sweet hearts. My husband said no man can accept another kid from another man and his wife. He can learn to love the kid but it wont be the same as his own. Also your wife or husband having ties with another beofre you you'll just think about them being together its like a used car nobody treasures or respects an old car like a new one. probably not the best simile but its so true. I personally feel that. Theres a certain level of respect thats shared if you've experienced everything together vs you already been divorced married again kids, etc etc.. But everyone is ENTITLED TO LOVE! no matter what their past holds everyone has their life.

nevermind. I need to find "bite my tongue" thread

ok....can't bite my tongue no longer. Must be nice to have a husband that views women as used cars. I hope and pray he doesn't put the same title on you one day. Just because you were raised a certain way does not make one immune to what may happen later in life.

well stated...sad

[Alhamdulillah 0]

my personal belief comes from an arab perspective and background...

Please don't generalize all Arabs with your remarks

...My husband said no man can accept another kid from another man and his wife. He can learn to love the kid but it wont be the same as his own.

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't. My husband is Arab from a very traditional family and he is better with my kids than their own father. In fact, they call him Daddy. He genuinely loves and cares for my children as if they were his own.

Also your wife or husband having ties with another beofre you you'll just think about them being together its like a used car nobody treasures or respects an old car like a new one. probably not the best simile but its so true. I personally feel that. Theres a certain level of respect thats shared if you've experienced everything together vs you already been divorced married again kids, etc etc..

I truly hope your husband never divorces you or mistreats you in any way that would make you need to divorce him, especially if you have children, so that you will never be in the position of being anyone's "used car"

[Ban Hammer 13,335]

dayum i missed vp my sis

[AnewKINDofFEELIN 0]

my personal belief comes from an arab perspective and background...

Please don't generalize all Arabs with your remarks

...My husband said no man can accept another kid from another man and his wife. He can learn to love the kid but it wont be the same as his own.

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't. My husband is Arab from a very traditional family and he is better with my kids than their own father. In fact, they call him Daddy. He genuinely loves and cares for my children as if they were his own.

Also your wife or husband having ties with another beofre you you'll just think about them being together its like a used car nobody treasures or respects an old car like a new one. probably not the best simile but its so true. I personally feel that. Theres a certain level of respect thats shared if you've experienced everything together vs you already been divorced married again kids, etc etc..

I truly hope your husband never divorces you or mistreats you in any way that would make you need to divorce him, especially if you have children, so that you will never be in the position of being anyone's "used car"

She never claimed to speak for all arabs. She just said that her view is from an arab perspective. Maybe you're offended by her new car smell or maybe you disagree, but don't try to discredit her, as you will only discredit yourself.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

but don't try to discredit her, as you will only discredit yourself.

She discredits herself by making such comments.

[AnewKINDofFEELIN 0]

but don't try to discredit her, as you will only discredit yourself.

She discredits herself by making such comments.

Then let it be as such. There's no need for you to stoop to the level of insulting her personally.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

Then let it be as such. There's no need for you to stoop to the level of insulting her personally.

Where did I insult her?

[AnewKINDofFEELIN 0]

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't.

Right here. Implications are as insulting as outright statements.

[Alhamdulillah 0]

Implications are as insulting as outright statements.

OK, calm down, calm down.

[Sinergy 3]

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't.

Right here. Implications are as insulting as outright statements.

How are those insults?

she had a good point

[AnewKINDofFEELIN 0]

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't.

Right here. Implications are as insulting as outright statements.

How are those insults?

she had a good point

How did the original poster's remarks warrant the scathing remarks that have been flung her way? They are insults because the only thing that the person could come up with was an argumentum ad hominem to dispute the initial statement.

[Sinergy 3]

Is your husband Arab as well? Does he speak for all Arabs like you? Does he speak for all men?

No, he doesn't.

Right here. Implications are as insulting as outright statements.

How are those insults?

she had a good point

How did the original poster's remarks warrant the scathing remarks that have been flung her way? They are insults because the only thing that the person could come up with was an argumentum ad hominem to dispute the initial statement.

much like you do all the time?

the OP stated "NO MAN CAN ACCEPT ANOTHER MANS KIDS" that is speaking for all arab men, which is something she shouldve revised to "MY MAN WOULDNT ACCEPT ANY OTHER MANS KIDS" in the way she wrote it and prolly meant it, was an insult to men, arab men and any woman who is married to an arab man who has kids by someone else.

[Sinergy 3]

the OP stated "NO MAN CAN ACCEPT ANOTHER MANS KIDS" that is speaking for all arab men, which is something she shouldve revised to "MY MAN WOULDNT ACCEPT ANY OTHER MANS KIDS" in the way she wrote it and prolly meant it, was an insult to men, arab men and any woman who is married to an arab man who has kids by someone else. had she been speaking only of her husband, it wouldnt have been insulting to ppl, however she used the term all men, and therefore insulted women married to arab men and prolly some arab men

QUOTE(sarahaziz @ Dec 20 2007, 02:24 PM)

...My husband said no man can accept another kid from another man and his wife. He can learn to love the kid but it wont be the same as his own.

QUOTE(sarahaziz @ Dec 20 2007, 02:24 PM)

Also your wife or husband having ties with another beofre you you'll just think about them being together its like a used car nobody treasures or respects an old car like a new one. probably not the best simile but its so true. I personally feel that. Theres a certain level of respect thats shared if you've experienced everything together vs you already been divorced married again kids, etc etc..QUOTE(sarahaziz @ Dec 20 2007, 02:24 PM)

my personal belief comes from an arab perspective and background...

Edited January 15, 2008 by Ionescu

[AnewKINDofFEELIN 0]

much like you do all the time?

Please point me to an ad hominem attack I have made. In fact, find any logical fallacy I have made. This should be interesting.