Dear Joyce

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce,

Have you ever taken a tub of Cool Whip and frozen it and eaten like ice cream? It is over the top in sinful goodness, but with fewer calories than ice cream. Enjoy.

Well, I admit to having made Cool Whip-sicles at one point for a party, but that was when I was going through an experimental phase (ifyaknowwhatimean). I admit to being something of a Cool Whip purist these days. I favor the dollop, but I'm very flexible about what it can go on. (Brother Dean, behave!)

And yes, much healthier than ice cream. People say, "Joyce, how do you keep that figure?" When I say, "Cool Whip!" they think I'm joking! Tee hee!

Love,

Joyce

[almaty 19]

i guess, i am an eco terrorist as i like whipped cream from the can ..is that wrong?

Edited January 22, 2008 by almaty

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce,

I'm a new fan!!

I have a tricky question - With the weather being so very cold these days, I need something to keep my head warm (in Canada we wear toques). What do you suggest as a fashionable way to keep warm?

Hello, and welcome to JoyceWorld!

I'm sorry that I can't offer a firsthand suggestion because my helmet keeps me warm in winter (it's several layers and has a built-in chemical warmer), but I've asked my friend Dave "Baby" Cortez--yes, he of the whistling organ--and he suggests an overturned tuba horn. He's a hoot, isn't he?

Seriously, if you must wear a hat while your helmet is in the grow-out stage, make sure you go for 100% synthetic. I suggest seafoam green or a paisley earthtones pattern to bring out the woman in you. Striking!

Love,

Joyce

i guess, i am an eco terrorist as i like whipped cream from the can ..is that wrong?

Whipped cream? Are you trying to wind me up, Brother Dean? Goodness!

Love,

Joyce

[Peikko 1,575]

Dear Joyce

Cool whip is quite a theme isn't it? Talking of, someone suggested that a nice naked dance might 'spice up' our sex life (No, not the Allstrips, we had a little contretemps on the golf course and have decided to put the dampers on that particular friendship!). My question is, would you advise some Cool Whip, strategically placed, to add that 'special something' or is naked is as naked does?

Your all of a lather

Mrs Holdem

Edited January 26, 2008 by Purple_Hibiscus

[eric&gen 0]

Cool whip is messy on the bed sheets

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce,

Thanks so much for the perm idea - I will definately try it - however I have a dilemna...I am planning ahead - way ahead, to when I meet my SO at the airport - do you have any suggestions for a nice fresh look to go w/that triple perm?? I just love your fashion sense....

thanks in advance,

Melinda

Dear Melinda:

Why, thank you for your confidence in my fashion sense! You are truly a woman of the modern age. There's no way you can go wrong with these fantastic stylish pants:

Your man is going to be speechless!

Love,

Joyce

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce

Cool whip is quite a theme isn't it? Talking of, someone suggested that a nice naked dance might 'spice up' our sex life (No, not the Allstrips, we had a little contretemps on the golf course and have decided to put the dampers on that particular friendship!). My question is, would you advise some Cool Whip, strategically placed, to add that 'special something' or is naked is as naked does?

Your all of a lather

Mrs Holdem

Nice to hear from you again, Mrs. Holdem!

Cool Whip is always a welcome addition to any intimate activity. By strategically placed, I assume you're referring to treating your hand dermatitis at the same time that you address your Cool Whip craving? By all means!

In terms of the nakedness adding to the intimacy of the encounter, that, of course, is up to you and your partner. I know that some people prefer no clothes (I call them nudists!), but I always found that leaving something to the imagination really adds to the excitement. I hope I'm not revealing too much, but a dashing former boyfriend preferred that I wear jumpsuit showing minimal skin. Goodness! He really liked polyester! Now that I think of it, he was an unusual character. He insisted on lime Jello every morning for breakfast, and if he didn't get it, well, the whole neighborhood knew because he'd break out his megaphone and bellow out the window of his moving station wagon!

Love,

Joyce

[Peikko 1,575]

Dear Joyce

Sunday's the big day! Well, it's big for some. Personally I can take it or leave it if it's all the same but you know men, they just love watching other big hunky men playing with balls don't they? Anyway, I thought I would put together a little spread for the occasion, you know, a few dips. However, I wondered if you had any advice on what to wear?

Yours

Mrs Holdem

PS, you were so right re imagination. My husband's face when I came to bed in my latest polyester jumpsuit, priceless.

Edited January 30, 2008 by Purple_Hibiscus

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce

Sunday's the big day! Well, it's big for some. Personally I can take it or leave it if it's all the same but you know men, they just love watching other big hunky men playing with balls don't they? Anyway, I thought I would put together a little spread for the occasion, you know, a few dips. However, I wondered if you had any advice on what to wear?

Yours

Mrs Holdem

PS, you were so right re imagination. My husband's face when I came to bed in my latest polyester jumpsuit, priceless.

Dear Mrs. Holdem:

Well, when a sporting event is the main attraction, you have to go that extra mile to make guests notice you and your excellent taste, not that large, sweaty guy in the numbered shirt!

How about a lovely patterned top to complement your helmet?

You'll be fielding compliments left and right while setting out your super bowl of Cool Whip!

Love,

Joyce

[*julez* 124]

Dear Joyce,

I know you like to keep your hair helmet paste recipe a secret, however in light of the upcoming Super Bowl festivities, I am hoping you'd share your favorite Cool Whip recipe! I'd really like to wow my guests at this year's bash!

Thanks,

Julez

P.S. I was visiting the UK last week and wish I'd had access to a computer as there were many times I wondered to myself, how would Joyce handle this situation? I really felt the loss of your wisdom!

[almaty 19]

same here..sister.. i tell my clients..well, my mentor joyce.,.tell you to put a turkey pot pie in the oven..spread cool whip over that pumpkin pie and put on Sinatra and start to cry...

[Empress of Groovy 373]

Dear Joyce,

I know you like to keep your hair helmet paste recipe a secret, however in light of the upcoming Super Bowl festivities, I am hoping you'd share your favorite Cool Whip recipe! I'd really like to wow my guests at this year's bash!

Thanks,

Julez

P.S. I was visiting the UK last week and wish I'd had access to a computer as there were many times I wondered to myself, how would Joyce handle this situation? I really felt the loss of your wisdom!

Dear Julez:

Why, thank you for the compliment, and I hope you had a wonderful time in the UK. I've always been impressed by the helmet products there. When I take that trip across the pond, I always stop by Boots for my favorite industrial_____. You thought I was going to mention it, didn't you! Tee hee!

Well, my favorite Cool Whip recipe is an easy one. Call me traditional, but I firmly believe you can't beat the classic Cool Whip on its own in a beautiful avocado-green Tupperware bowl. Deeeee-licious! Don't worry, your guests will be wowed by the beautiful jumpsuit you'll no doubt be wearing!

Love,

Joyce

same here..sister.. i tell my clients..well, my mentor joyce.,.tell you to put a turkey pot pie in the oven..spread cool whip over that pumpkin pie and put on Sinatra and start to cry...

Goodness! That all sounds good except for the crying part. There's no crying in the Joyce Dimension! Goodness! But I'll take the pies (just a sliver, thank you)!

Love,

Joyce

[almaty 19]

sister joyce,

some information./

who is your favorite singer? slim whitman?

who is your favorite actor?

[Empress of Groovy 373]

sister joyce,

some information./

who is your favorite singer? slim whitman?

who is your favorite actor?

Well, I wouldn't say I have a favorite singer, but I've been listening to a lot of Dave "Baby" Cortez lately. His whistling organ really gets me through these grim winter months!

Favorite actor: No question, Alan Alda. Rrrrrowwwrrrrr!

Love,

Joyce

[Peikko 1,575]

Dear Joyce

Alan Alda? I have to say I am a little suprised, he doesn't look like the polyester type at all.

Yours humbled and confused

Mrs Holdem