*Baby Corner*

[chnst 6]

I just had the tour of my hospital last week--the midwives showed us that they HAVE stirrups, but mentioned that they rarely use them. The beds come apart and can be used to support the mom while standing/squatting--they said that you can deliver the baby whatever way seems most comfortable.

I am going to be reading a lot about birthing over the next few weeks...my big concern right now is whether or not my husband will be helpful to have around! He will be there because I want him to be there for the birth of our child. I love him dearly, but he can be a bit high-maintenance sometimes. I would love to have a female friend with me, but it seems that my most supportive/knowledgeable friends will likely be out of town at that time. The midwives are great, but not the same as someone you know.

THERE is the difference between midwifes and OBs. I HOPE HOPE HOPE not to be GBS positive so I won't be strapped to bed with an antibiotics IV. I will just have them stick those little tubes in me but only put me on the IV when necessary so I can move around freely and do whatever feels good. The nurse said "These beds come apart right here cause there are stirrups that you will have your legs in druing delivery". As I said before, it is the only thing that bothers me and I really think that as long as it feels better for mom in the end, they will let you pull your legs closer. I don't think OBs will catch a baby when mom is squatting since it is 'uncomfortable' for them (go figure). Midwifes are so much better. I wish I had one and I'm glad I have my Doula.

They will not, unless you threaten them with a lawsuit. They don't care if you are comfortable, they want to deliver the baby how they learned it in school, with as little "mess" as possible to clean up, so they can go home sooner. I'd definitely work this into your birth plan. IV's aren't as restrictive as they used to be anymore. If they are nice, they could give you an extra line so you have more space to move around your IV stand.

The only thing that is restrictive is when you have an epidural and your legs are numb, and because of the epidural they have to attach monitors to you and baby and a catheter.

But it still doesn't mean that you can't sit up. I'm glad you got a Doula, I'm sure that will help a lot! I'm going with a midwife with my next baby.

[Carolyn 1]

We were also told that people who had GBS or had to have an IV for other reasons would be able to walk around with their IV poles...

Grrr...I don't see any reason to make you lie down on your back to give birth--it's just all wrong and against how our bodies naturally want to be in labor! I'd go to another hospital if they told me that!!

BTW, have you all seen the film The Business of Being Born? I imagine it has already been discussed on this incredibly long thread, but it is so affirming of women and the natural process of childbirth.

[BelwinMills 0]

Carolyn! Don't worry your husband will probably be a big help. Mine was during my C-section. He said he wasn't going to be in the room when I gave birth but he was and he watched the whole C-section. He was taller than the curtain. I need him there cause it was a rough C-section. That took about 35 minutes just to get her out. Yes read the section on C-section cause my doctor went back and forth about what to do. Then week 39 he told me my pelvic bone was to small to give birth. Why he waited this long to check my cervix I will never know. That is why I will be getting a new doctor for my annual check up and if we have another one in the next 4 years. That is awesome you gals had hospital visits to see the facilities. I never had one except for when I had the flu and had to be omited. Is this common to get a hospital tour?

[Anna C. 4]

We toured our birthing center yesterday (it is attached to a hospital). The only reason they give you an IV there is when you are GBS positive, but you get a mobile unit to move around. Of course you can also say no to the antibiotics, but in GBS case I would take them.

Their beds didn't have stirrups really, just foot rests that don't go higher than your body. I don't care whether my obgyn will think that it is uncomfortable, I will deliver in the position that I want (and the hospital encourages that). I didn't have time to talk to him yet yesterday (provider change cause of moving) - but I chose him particularily because people on mothering.com and other places recommended him to go along with natural births / birth plans.

@Carolyn: I saw the movie and it didn't surprise me.... What surprised me now was that my birthing center has a c-section rate of 12.5% overall for first time moms and that they have many policies that comply with my idea of birth... I kinda expected worse. I would have opted for a homebirth, but my insurance doesn't cover it. My DH is my coach and he is very reliable on pushing our demands.

[chri'stina 190]

My husband was also a big help. I only planned on having him in for the birth(no other relatives). I had a very long labor and then the c-section, and he was really helpful. He watched the whole surgery and would tell me what was going on(I wanted to know). He got to take a pic of them taking Kavi out. After the c-section he had to change Kavi's diaper and other stuff while I was confined to the bed. He also helped me when we got home. I wouldn't have been able to do anything without him.

I had a lot of things planned but nothing went like I planned it. Try to be flexible even if you have a concrete plan---things don't always go just like we think they will.

We didn't get a tour of the hospital. I had been there several times for people I knew who gave birth there, but they didn't offer a real tour. They only showed pictures of the birthing rooms. That was kind of stupid. But their rooms were nice.

[BelwinMills 0]

Good news Jay finely slept for 7 hours last night. We had been at my mom and dads and she wouldn't sleep all afternoon. Then we left at night time and she slept away. Maybe I should keep her up all afternoon to sleep at night. . I think this will be the first and last for awhile.

[Carolyn 1]

Thanks for all the encouragement on the husband scene, ladies!

Did you all go to Lamanze classes or any childbirthing classes with your husbands? I am in this midwife group (10 women all due in August!) which covers all kinds of educational info along with what you would normally do at your individual midwife appointments. I have usually gone by myself, but I asked Simo to join us last week for the hospital tour. I don't know if he will agree to go for the childbirthing part--he hates big groups of people sitting around talking in English (unless there is beer and good music involved ).

I am hopeful that he will rise to the occasion--I KNOW that he is so excited to be a dad, it's just not typical in his culture for men to have any part in the birthing process. He will do it, but only because I ask him to. I think it will be a great experience for him to be there in person watching his child being born!

[Eveline 9]

Changing hospitals or even providers is not possible since 1st. he's the only one in the area giving me thumbs up for a VBAC (other's don't even do it) and 2nd, I'm plain out too lazy to be looking for a new provider in my 36th week of pregnancy.

We'll see how the stirrup thing goes. I'm still hoping on having a very fast 35 minute birth at home, haha...wishful thinking.

[Carolyn 1]

Eveline,

Sounds like you'll just have to stay at home as long as physically possible...best of luck with the VBAC! I hope that you have a speedy and comfortable delivery!

[BelwinMills 0]

Changing hospitals or even providers is not possible since 1st. he's the only one in the area giving me thumbs up for a VBAC (other's don't even do it) and 2nd, I'm plain out too lazy to be looking for a new provider in my 36th week of pregnancy.

We'll see how the stirrup thing goes. I'm still hoping on having a very fast 35 minute birth at home, haha...wishful thinking.

Eveline I am real helping it turns out that way for you. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!

[♥JP♥ 5]

My husband initially refused to come to the delivery room with me. My mom also refuses to go, she said she can't watch me go through all that pain which I can understand. Which leaves my best friend. She has been planning to be there since day 1.

So one day I casually mention to my husband, "Do you really want my friend to be the first person to welcome Taleen into the world?" He looked at me and said "NO....I'm coming!" Now he is really excited about it and wants to know what he gets to wear in the room.

As far as the birthing room, we never got an official tour because our hospital doesn't allow it. However I was admitted to Labor & Delivery in my 5th month when I had a bladder infection and was placed on IV meds. The nurse was kind enough to show us the birthing room. They are all private and HUGE. The hospital is new, it was build 2 years ago. The labor room is the same room you give birth in and they also clean up the baby there and thats where they stay until its time to go to the Mother-Baby room. This room was slightly smaller but still very nice. The only negative thing...the food SUCKED.

They also give you the option of what position you would like to give birth in, nothing is set in stone there. They don't even order routine episiotomies. The best part, our house is 1 block away.

[sara535 15]

I never took a tour or any classes or anything else, I just rolled the die I guess I just didnt really feel the need to make a big birth plan or be too stringent on how I wanted it to go because honestly anything can happen and usually does. I've seen too many friends be very disappointed because it didnt happen how they envisioned it instead of just being joyful to have a healthy happy mom and baby.....

the funniest part of my husband being there was when my midwife told me that we really needed to do the C-section and that only one person could come in the OR with me, he looked expectantly at my girlfriend as if to say 'well, go ahead then'. HAHAHHA. she quickly set him straight on that! I know he was nervous as hell to come in there and see me and all the doctors but once it was all underway he was fine. It was important for him to be there and participate - in his religion there is a special prayer that should be said or whispered to the baby as one of the first things he or she ever hears entering the world, so as soon as she was out he stepped over the little table and held her and said the prayer. It was cool too because I had talked to my midwife about it and everyone in the room was as quiet as possible until the prayer was finished.

Edited July 9, 2008 by sara535

[♥JP♥ 5]

I never took a tour or any classes or anything else, I just rolled the die I guess I just didnt really feel the need to make a big birth plan or be too stringent on how I wanted it to go because honestly anything can happen and usually does. I've seen too many friends be very disappointed because it didnt happen how they envisioned it instead of just being joyful to have a healthy happy mom and baby.....

the funniest part of my husband being there was when my midwife told me that we really needed to do the C-section and that only one person could come in the OR with me, he looked expectantly at my girlfriend as if to say 'well, go ahead then'. HAHAHHA. she quickly set him straight on that! I know he was nervous as hell to come in there and see me and all the doctors but once it was all underway he was fine. It was important for him to be there and participate - in his religion there is a special prayer that should be said or whispered to the baby as one of the first things he or she ever hears entering the world, so as soon as she was out he stepped over the little table and held her and said the prayer. It was cool too because I had talked to my midwife about it and everyone in the room was as quiet as possible until the prayer was finished.

Awwww Sara, that is so sweet!

I did do a birthing plan bcz the hospital requires its. But it pissed me off I must say. I put all this effort into it and then the Dr said "Don't be surprised if none of this happens" She explained that nothing usually goes as planned. Then WHY make me do a freaking birthing plan! Oh well...the real plan is: go to hospital, give birth, hold my lil munchkin...the end.

[BelwinMills 0]

I didn't do a birthing plan either and I did not take any " L "breathing classes either. I had heard some of my girlfriends say they weren't worth it.

[Eveline 9]

Thank you for all the wishes ladies. I think my legs in stirrups are the least problem. I know that it's not the most comfortable (for me) way to give birth but I'm happy to do it vaginally at all this time.