Email and Instant messages

[awu25 0]

We have had taken a vacation trip together to Thailand and I have visited her in Ukraine. We do most of our communication over instant message though my lawyer says we need to start calling each other so we have records of constant communication so we are starting to do that now.

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

My question is can this still prove that we have an ongoing relationship without saying things which may make people puke?

Edited December 13, 2007 by awu25

[BigCityDave 0]

We have had taken a vacation trip together to Thailand and I have visited her in Ukraine. We do most of our communication over instant message though my lawyer says we need to start calling each other so we have records of constant communication so we are starting to do that now.

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

My question is can this still prove that we have an ongoing relationship without saying things which may make people puke?

Sure, just as long as you can prove you have some sort of communication with that person. They need to just know that you have continual communication with that person. That is why phone bills are good evidence to show. Emails as well.

[truffles 2]

I understand exactly what you mean...me and my now husband whilst not being overtly lovey dovey often sent each other cards with appropriate sentiments - especially the kind that let you know you are missing your SO. If you do send cards keep the envelopes as they are date stamped and can show recent communication.

Good luck

[bora bora 1]

While my husband I DID write super lovey dovey stuff to each other - I sent only a few e-mails and they weren't too bad. I sent an e-mail where we were discussing our anniversary, another about our plans, and then a couple ones.

You can do the same thing - the ones showing you making plans are good.

[ric 0]

I didn't add a lot of super smushy emails. I put in newsy emails mostly, emails that said we were excited about an upcoming visit, emails I'd sent when I was stuck at work and he was at home during a visit... They spoke to being comfortably together, even if they weren't saccharine sweet. I think you'll be okay. They can't expect everybody to be proclaiming their undying love in roses and sweet promises all the time!!

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Dont put to much concern into what is said, they know anyone can (stage) emails, letters to say what they want them to say thinking they are using them as proof. Use a few emails from continuing time stages, have a phone record to show the continued calls etc alot of times this stuff is never looked at after it is taken to the interview......

[Kathryn41 3,205]

We didn't put any of the 'mushy' stuff in either, except for the way we signed our emails to each other. Most of the ones I included were more like discussion of upcoming visits, or last visits, or plans for the house and furnishings, or arrangements for the physical move of me and the cats - the kind of things you would discuss with your 'spouse' or 'spouse to be' on a daily basis. You might want to do logging or some copy and paste of some of your instant messaging and storing the sessions in a notepad or something that you can print out. Then you can pick and choose some of the more useful segments to include with the package.

[*JG* 2]

We had ONLY phone records and the cards I sent him. He did not have a computer. How would they know what we said to each other? I wouldn't stress too much on the content of your communication.

[Kazan' Tiger 1]

I've been through this twice (same fiancée, we had to withdrawal on the first run). I never showed any proof of communication via e-mail or telephone. She was approved both times with only tickets, passport stamps, visas, gift delivery receipts, and photos of us together. I would not sweat phone records.

[denny01 0]

I am hoping phone records arent a big deal....because we have maybe one phone call a month.....alot more before a visit.....but its so easy to get on MSN instant messaging and communicate that way.....I started saving those files...and now have over 2000 + pages to choose from.....if that isnt evidence of a relationship.....I give up.

Edited December 14, 2007 by denny01

[SqdnGuns 21]

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

So, why are you doing a K-1 Visa now?

[Kazan' Tiger 1]

You know, I totally missed that. I have to ask also. Why are you doing a fiancée visa with someone you do not love yet?

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

So, why are you doing a K-1 Visa now?

[awu25 0]

You know, I totally missed that. I have to ask also. Why are you doing a fiancée visa with someone you do not love yet?

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

So, why are you doing a K-1 Visa now?

Boy if only I get a nickel every time I have a debate about "love".

Please do not try to change my believe when I say I don't believe in "love", not the Hollywood version at least. To me, love between a couple just means addiction to someone where one is so addicted that he/she is willing to give so much to be with someone or get whatever he/she wants from the other person if not to be with that person. I am glad my fiancee has the similar believe as I do. Things that are important to me are respect and chemistry, ie. feeling comfortable together. Love(Hollywood version) is not necessary...if I want to be strict about it, it is undesirable. It clouds my/her judgment.

[bora bora 1]

Send what you can as proof of communication. I only sent one phone record since that's all I had. I sent copies of used phone cards, 5 emails (w/ translations), one birthday card, maybe some envelopes since we sent gifts to each other...

I sent a bit of everything.

I had also saved some MSN conversations but they're longgggg so I didn't bother since I had other proof.

[Kazan' Tiger 1]

Hey, what ever works for you. I have friend that has a similar philosophy albeit strange one, for me personally. I believe, love is a feeling of strong want and desire between my fiancée and I to spend our lives together in an intimate way. It is far from addiction, as neither of us needs each other to survive. Addiction is a dependance by definition. Our love is not that. For me, I could never marry anyone I did not love. Better to stay single.

You know, I totally missed that. I have to ask also. Why are you doing a fiancée visa with someone you do not love yet?

We are not the lovy dovy kind of couple and while we do discuss our future together, how we enjoy each other's company, lots of flirting we have not really used the "L" word except in some of our flirt and jokes.

So, why are you doing a K-1 Visa now?

Boy if only I get a nickel every time I have a debate about "love".

Please do not try to change my believe when I say I don't believe in "love", not the Hollywood version at least. To me, love between a couple just means addiction to someone where one is so addicted that he/she is willing to give so much to be with someone or get whatever he/she wants from the other person if not to be with that person. I am glad my fiancee has the similar believe as I do. Things that are important to me are respect and chemistry, ie. feeling comfortable together. Love(Hollywood version) is not necessary...if I want to be strict about it, it is undesirable. It clouds my/her judgment.

Edited December 14, 2007 by Kazan' Tiger