Wife raped

[Jim♥Michelle 0]

well, i had my filipina fiancee read this thread. i asked her if that had happened is it likely the woman would give the baby to the "rapist" family. She said it was possible since she wouldnt want the child born of a rape. Having said that she agreed with me that she didnt believe the story. She felt it was her boyfriend who got her pregnant while having a USA husband. happens there more frequently than you would think.

First if an adult filipina has a male "best friend" thats a boyfriend. the culture there is very conservative. Most women dont date alot and they have a chaperone if they do. One of my fiance's friends wants to find a foreign husband. she of course has a filipino boyfriend who the girl states is not her future, so she is looking while keeping this guy on the side. whole thing sounds like she has the USA husband but kept her filipino boyfriend and he got her pregnant. Funny she didnt tell her USA husband about the baby and "rape" until she had to. ANd she didnt go to the police and file a report. The filipino "rapist" is paying the medical bills ( theres a red flag if you ever needed one) of the future baby and the families agree for his family to take care of the baby once born.

I am sure the girl cried when she told the USA husband. i think she was seeing her whole future crumble away. If i was the USA husband i would stand with the wife but only if she went to the police and filed the rape charge. I would go there and be with her for support. If he raped her, he should be punished and she shouldnt protect him. I think she wont go to the police because she is protecting the guy. fortunate he is in korea right now. i say either she is faithful and loyal to the USA husband and files charges on the "best friend rapist" or she is loyal to the filipino boyfriend and the USA Husband should cut his losses. I might be alittle more compassionate if she had told the husband about the rape when it happened, not when she knew she was pregnant and couldnt hide it any longer. I dont believe the guy made threats to her to stay quiet but yet pays the medical bills and is taking the child when its born. Guys who make threats to keep a rape quiet would deny being the father of the baby, not pay the bills and embrace it.

Chris

You're right. As a Filipina, I am sorry to say but I don't believe your wife stories.. Many Filipina here especially those from remote areas or in any provinces WILL DO everything just to migrate in other countries and to have a better future. I heard a lot of different stories here in my country. Having a foreigner boyfriend or husband is like you won a lottery.. it's true! It's easy for them to use a foreigner to survive in poverty.. It's a "sacrifice" just for a better future even the foreigner is too OLD, UGLY and NASTY.. they're willing to marry them just for the green card and $$$.. Not only Americans are suffering from this "cheating".. second is Japanese..

As I read your story, Im sorry Daveg "did you ask your wife if the rapist WAS HER EX-BOYFRIEND, CURRENT Boyfriend and not just a simple friend?" If he's JUST a friend he will not do that thing!.. But if the guy likes your wife or they're really a "SECRET LOVERS" maybe it's okey for her NOT to file a report because she will protect her "SPECIAL FRIEND" and of course, no one wants my child's father or lover in prison because soon I'll petition him too. I'm not being harsh on you but I want you to realize that. I'm just concerned to you! And also giving her future baby to the parents of the rapist is REALLY DUBIOUS! After your wife become Citizen she'll then petition her baby and soon the rapist..

Ahm, why not surprise visit her but investigate first.. hire or contact a person to investigate if you're wife is telling the truth and to know the real reason why she didn't file a report.. And traceback what's the real score between the rapist and you're beloved wife!? how they met, etc.... chatting for about 6 hours a day - cam to cam is not enough to know a person.. but if you're together you will know her better then tell me if she's really nice, sweet and shy girl.. I'm so sorry but im a filipina, I know how they think and knows whats happening here in my country. I know more Filipina as much as you do.. Well, think about it before you petition her.

Concerned Citizen from Philippines

[athena_ny 1]

well, i had my filipina fiancee read this thread. i asked her if that had happened is it likely the woman would give the baby to the "rapist" family. She said it was possible since she wouldnt want the child born of a rape. Having said that she agreed with me that she didnt believe the story. She felt it was her boyfriend who got her pregnant while having a USA husband. happens there more frequently than you would think.

First if an adult filipina has a male "best friend" thats a boyfriend. the culture there is very conservative. Most women dont date alot and they have a chaperone if they do. One of my fiance's friends wants to find a foreign husband. she of course has a filipino boyfriend who the girl states is not her future, so she is looking while keeping this guy on the side. whole thing sounds like she has the USA husband but kept her filipino boyfriend and he got her pregnant. Funny she didnt tell her USA husband about the baby and "rape" until she had to. ANd she didnt go to the police and file a report. The filipino "rapist" is paying the medical bills ( theres a red flag if you ever needed one) of the future baby and the families agree for his family to take care of the baby once born.

I am sure the girl cried when she told the USA husband. i think she was seeing her whole future crumble away. If i was the USA husband i would stand with the wife but only if she went to the police and filed the rape charge. I would go there and be with her for support. If he raped her, he should be punished and she shouldnt protect him. I think she wont go to the police because she is protecting the guy. fortunate he is in korea right now. i say either she is faithful and loyal to the USA husband and files charges on the "best friend rapist" or she is loyal to the filipino boyfriend and the USA Husband should cut his losses. I might be alittle more compassionate if she had told the husband about the rape when it happened, not when she knew she was pregnant and couldnt hide it any longer. I dont believe the guy made threats to her to stay quiet but yet pays the medical bills and is taking the child when its born. Guys who make threats to keep a rape quiet would deny being the father of the baby, not pay the bills and embrace it.

Chris

You're right. As a Filipina, I am sorry to say but I don't believe your wife stories.. Many Filipina here especially those from remote areas or in any provinces WILL DO everything just to migrate in other countries and to have a better future. I heard a lot of different stories here in my country. Having a foreigner boyfriend or husband is like you won a lottery.. it's true! It's easy for them to use a foreigner to survive in poverty.. It's a "sacrifice" just for a better future even the foreigner is too OLD, UGLY and NASTY.. they're willing to marry them just for the green card and $$$.. Not only Americans are suffering from this "cheating".. second is Japanese..

As I read your story, Im sorry Daveg "did you ask your wife if the rapist WAS HER EX-BOYFRIEND, CURRENT Boyfriend and not just a simple friend?" If he's JUST a friend he will not do that thing!.. But if the guy likes your wife or they're really a "SECRET LOVERS" maybe it's okey for her NOT to file a report because she will protect her "SPECIAL FRIEND" and of course, no one wants my child's father or lover in prison because soon I'll petition him too. I'm not being harsh on you but I want you to realize that. I'm just concerned to you! And also giving her future baby to the parents of the rapist is REALLY DUBIOUS! After your wife become Citizen she'll then petition her baby and soon the rapist..

Ahm, why not surprise visit her but investigate first.. hire or contact a person to investigate if you're wife is telling the truth and to know the real reason why she didn't file a report.. And traceback what's the real score between the rapist and you're beloved wife!? how they met, etc.... chatting for about 6 hours a day - cam to cam is not enough to know a person.. but if you're together you will know her better then tell me if she's really nice, sweet and shy girl.. I'm so sorry but im a filipina, I know how they think and knows whats happening here in my country. I know more Filipina as much as you do.. Well, think about it before you petition her.

Concerned Citizen from Philippines

[Jaseball 0]

This thread really should be locked. So many good opinions and posts made and there is nothing more to be said.

Being in love head over heels means you overlook, forgive, and make excuses for the person you love.

My guess in this case is the OP's case will be denied if they get to the interview. It may be devastating at first, but the CO will most likely see things and the warning signs and go on the side of caution.

It's stuff like this where I wish the K1 visa allowed for 1 year for marriage upon entry to the US.

[sj5 4]

Hi this is a very hard question for me to ask and a very terrible thing that happened in our relationship.

My Wife was raped and I really dont want to go into details of it of course ,and now she is pregnant from the guy. She did not report the rape because of threats made from the guy, and she was very scared.

I know she was really raped becuse after she went into details of it she broke down crying and I could tell she was telling me the truth. She is also a very shy sweet Pinay from the philippines and would not be in her character to cheat on me. We have been talking on cam and chat for 10 months now on average 6 to 7 hours a day almost so we also know each other very well. We also talk on the phone alot and messenger computer to computer call.

My question is will this affect her in the interview when she will try to get her visa to come here and finally be with me? As many know abortion in the philppines is illegal. She will have the baby a few months before the medical exam and interview but plans on telling them the truth if asked if she has a kid. Our worry is if they ask if it is ours, she will have to say no its from an other guy. And we are not sure if they will belive she was raped if she needs to tell them why it isnt from me? We just pray this wont affect us finally being together becuse we are in so much love and can't wait to be together like the so many other couples going through the same process.

If anyone can help I would apprecaiate it so much.

Sorry to heard these. She can stay somewhere and then report that guy who raped her. This is my question.. Do you and her want to keep a baby of rapist?

I don't support abortion but if comes to your wife's case..I support 100% abortion. So many woman do abortion in Philippines.

Chelbear, I do agree to you..but we never know. She have to report him to prove that she is not lying.

Edited October 4, 2007 by Pugnacious

[chris4gretchen 1]

i agree now that its time for the thread to end.

the OP has made his mind up early in the posts to believe his wife and not the common sense and red flags pointed out here on the board.

the common theme of if the wife was raped or had consensual sex with her boyfriend is a moot point. the overwhelming advice is they will be denied at interview unless the wife has police report to back her story. She wont do that since the philippines is very harsh on that crime and if he was her boyfriend she couldnt do that to him. once they are denied at the interview, the OP can either choose to move there and live with his wife, have a long distance marriage, which he doesnt seem able to afford to travel alot,or divorce her since they cant be together here in the usa. the only hope they have of her coming here is her to file charges to make her case legitimate.

Im willing to bet if the OP pressured her to file charges on the guy, she wouldnt even if it meant having the USA husband divorce her, harsh as that sounds. she has the old guy, the baby and can always meet another foreigner in the future to give her another life once all this stuff has cooled down and time has passed from the birth of the child. right now she is trying to salvage what she can out of this mess, but she cant without going the distance. her words are not enough in the boards opinion. i really feel sorry for her and the husband.

thread is dead.

Chris

Edited October 4, 2007 by chris4gretchen

[Jim♥Michelle 0]

[mox 298]

Damn, this thread had almost fallen off the front page.

Please refrain from further posting on this thread unless you have some truly new information to add. The OP has all the information he needs to make a decision, and everything else is just belaboring the point. Please let the thread die.

[Dakine 26]

i agree now that its time for the thread to end.

the OP has made his mind up early in the posts to believe his wife and not the common sense and red flags pointed out here on the board.

the common theme of if the wife was raped or had consensual sex with her boyfriend is a moot point. the overwhelming advice is they will be denied at interview unless the wife has police report to back her story. She wont do that since the philippines is very harsh on that crime and if he was her boyfriend she couldnt do that to him. once they are denied at the interview, the OP can either choose to move there and live with his wife, have a long distance marriage, which he doesnt seem able to afford to travel alot,or divorce her since they cant be together here in the usa. the only hope they have of her coming here is her to file charges to make her case legitimate.

Im willing to bet if the OP pressured her to file charges on the guy, she wouldnt even if it meant having the USA husband divorce her, harsh as that sounds. she has the old guy, the baby and can always meet another foreigner in the future to give her another life once all this stuff has cooled down and time has passed from the birth of the child. right now she is trying to salvage what she can out of this mess, but she cant without going the distance. her words are not enough in the boards opinion. i really feel sorry for her and the husband.

thread is dead.

Chris

divorce her since they cant be together here in the usa.

The sad thing is there isn't divorce in the Philippines only annulment which takes a couple 1000 bucks.

If the pinay was telling the truth and it was truely rape and the OP truely loves the lady and wants her to have a decent life she is pretty much screwed in being able to move on with her life as it looks like the OP is broke and can't help her in anyway.

There is no way the average Filipina can afford an annulment.

Bottomline is is not to marry in the Philippines if you are short on money and can't finish what you started.

Lots of married pinay in PI have been "hung out to dry" when visas were denied.

Guys can get a divorce easily in the US and move on with their lives.

One click on the computer and the pinay is history.

Fiance visas are the "safest" way to go for all concerned.

[Donna A 4]

is rape a common thing in the phillapeans? someone else here had the same story a while back...wife raped and now pregnant by rapist. dont remember how it turned out tho.

[archie07 0]

is rape a common thing in the phillapeans? someone else here had the same story a while back...wife raped and now pregnant by rapist. dont remember how it turned out tho.

I believe somewhere in this thread the guy said his wife was denied. I do agree with others though, there isn't much more advice we can give Dave accept for his wife maybe having a consultation with an immigration lawyer.