This is what's going on.

[athena_ny 1]

no, you're right; discounting someone else's opinion or advice because their experience doesn't exactly match your own is silly, and becoming histrionic and acting as if you're the only one having a hard time is also unnecessary and doesn't get anyone anywhere

but trying to 'put people in their place' or educate them as if they're children is also unhelpful... when you've come out the other side of the whole thing, obviously you have a lot to share with others - but if this isn't done in a way that will make them receptive to that experience or advice, then I think it's counter-productive

so much comes down to the ways in which things are done... two people can tell me the exact same thing, but if one seems to be going out of their way to make me feel stupid, and the other seems to be going out of their way to be reassuring, I know which one I'll listen to

(the above are general comments and genuinely not aimed at anyone in particular; just things I've felt on a number of occasions when reading threads here)

I agree with you 100%. I think some people only come on here to mess with peoples minds. They know those who are waiting for an approval are very stressed and vulnerable. They claim they are offering their expertise, help and empathy but in reality they just seem to want to cause conflict. Personally, I am getting very tired of people who were approved very quickly telling us who have not, that we are "whiners", or that "waiting never killed anyone". Somehow I do not see the empathy or sensitivity in a statement like that.

Those who went through the whole visa process in 150 days should understand that many people on here have waited 150 days and still do not have an NOA2. I am sure you guys who got approved quickly were still stressed during your waiting. Think about the people still waiting for approvals.

I am not saying that anyone has suffered any more or any less than anyone else but I do not think people should judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

Can't we all just get along

Exactly. Which is why the "my journey sucks harder" diatribe is getting old.

As for the rest of your post, that's just total bull.

Edited September 26, 2007 by meow mix

[afterforever 0]

no, you're right; discounting someone else's opinion or advice because their experience doesn't exactly match your own is silly, and becoming histrionic and acting as if you're the only one having a hard time is also unnecessary and doesn't get anyone anywhere

but trying to 'put people in their place' or educate them as if they're children is also unhelpful... when you've come out the other side of the whole thing, obviously you have a lot to share with others - but if this isn't done in a way that will make them receptive to that experience or advice, then I think it's counter-productive

so much comes down to the ways in which things are done... two people can tell me the exact same thing, but if one seems to be going out of their way to make me feel stupid, and the other seems to be going out of their way to be reassuring, I know which one I'll listen to

(the above are general comments and genuinely not aimed at anyone in particular; just things I've felt on a number of occasions when reading threads here)

I agree with you 100%. I think some people only come on here to mess with peoples minds. They know those who are waiting for an approval are very stressed and vulnerable. They claim they are offering their expertise, help and empathy but in reality they just seem to want to cause conflict. Personally, I am getting very tired of people who were approved very quickly telling us who have not, that we are "whiners", or that "waiting never killed anyone". Somehow I do not see the empathy or sensitivity in a statement like that.

Those who went through the whole visa process in 150 days should understand that many people on here have waited 150 days and still do not have an NOA2. I am sure you guys who got approved quickly were still stressed during your waiting. Think about the people still waiting for approvals.

I am not saying that anyone has suffered any more or any less than anyone else but I do not think people should judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

Can't we all just get along

Exactly. Which is why the "my journey sucks harder" diatribe is getting old.

As for the rest of your post, that's just total bull.

Your entitled to your opinion. Just because YOU say something is bull doesn't make it so. You have proved my point about empathy and sensitivity and wanting to cause conflict.

Edited September 27, 2007 by afterforever

[athena_ny 1]

no, you're right; discounting someone else's opinion or advice because their experience doesn't exactly match your own is silly, and becoming histrionic and acting as if you're the only one having a hard time is also unnecessary and doesn't get anyone anywhere

but trying to 'put people in their place' or educate them as if they're children is also unhelpful... when you've come out the other side of the whole thing, obviously you have a lot to share with others - but if this isn't done in a way that will make them receptive to that experience or advice, then I think it's counter-productive

so much comes down to the ways in which things are done... two people can tell me the exact same thing, but if one seems to be going out of their way to make me feel stupid, and the other seems to be going out of their way to be reassuring, I know which one I'll listen to

(the above are general comments and genuinely not aimed at anyone in particular; just things I've felt on a number of occasions when reading threads here)

I agree with you 100%. I think some people only come on here to mess with peoples minds. They know those who are waiting for an approval are very stressed and vulnerable. They claim they are offering their expertise, help and empathy but in reality they just seem to want to cause conflict. Personally, I am getting very tired of people who were approved very quickly telling us who have not, that we are "whiners", or that "waiting never killed anyone". Somehow I do not see the empathy or sensitivity in a statement like that.

Those who went through the whole visa process in 150 days should understand that many people on here have waited 150 days and still do not have an NOA2. I am sure you guys who got approved quickly were still stressed during your waiting. Think about the people still waiting for approvals.

I am not saying that anyone has suffered any more or any less than anyone else but I do not think people should judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

Can't we all just get along

Exactly. Which is why the "my journey sucks harder" diatribe is getting old.

As for the rest of your post, that's just total bull.

Your entitled to your opinion. Just because YOU say something is bull doesn't make it so. You have proved my point about empathy and sensitivity and wanting to cause conflict.

That's YOUR opinion. Just because YOU say it doesn't make it true.

But you're right, I have little tolerance for whiners in any aspect of my life. As do a lot of people here, and I'm not here to cause conflict - outside of the whining party threads, all I try to do is help people, especially those who are doing it from a non-conventional visa.

[MKCT 0]

Everybody stop!!!!!!!!!

This thread should be closed...everyone is out of topic!

We are all in this together

Edited September 27, 2007 by Mirla

[nate&nid 0]

USCIS was holding a gun at the head of Congress to get the fee hikes approved. Either pass the fee hikes or we'll sit on our duffs! So Congress approved the fee hike (under serious protest). The first attempt by USCIS failed.

I read this with much skepticism, since "taxpayer-paid gov't employees sitting on duffs" would definately raise unwanted flags at the OIG level. USCIS is financed thru taxpayers, stopping work because you "want more money" is one of the ways for a Federal Employee to find hisself/herself looking for another job, or spending time behind bars.

Edited September 27, 2007 by nate&nid

[mox 298]

No don't stop yet...

I still have a little beverage left.

[no name 1]

I agree with you 100%. I think some people only come on here to mess with peoples minds. They know those who are waiting for an approval are very stressed and vulnerable. They claim they are offering their expertise, help and empathy but in reality they just seem to want to cause conflict. Personally, I am getting very tired of people who were approved very quickly telling us who have not, that we are "whiners", or that "waiting never killed anyone". Somehow I do not see the empathy or sensitivity in a statement like that.

Those who went through the whole visa process in 150 days should understand that many people on here have waited 150 days and still do not have an NOA2. I am sure you guys who got approved quickly were still stressed during your waiting. Think about the people still waiting for approvals.

I am not saying that anyone has suffered any more or any less than anyone else but I do not think people should judge someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

Can't we all just get along

Passive aggressive & contradictory posts like yours are completely ridiculous. You bash everyone, contradict yourself then say can't we get along? Pathetic.

[Bill B 0]

It sure does seem like some of these posters either work for USCIS, or maybe they just say good things about them; kissing their...think that in some way USCIS will help them personally. Pick me, help me, I stuck up for you, blah blah blah...

It also must be nice to have your significant other from one of the 27 countries on the VISA Waiver Program so your loved one can come here and visit for 90 days without a VISA. http://travel.state.gov/visa/temp/without/without_1990.html Oh wait, I am sure the compasionate ones who are here to "help" us will say something like, "nobody told you to fall in love with someone from a country that is not on the list..."or something else real intelligent, helpful, and caring.

So here you go to all of you "I just try to help people...but they don't want to listen to me (us)" people. Fresh blood here...time for you to feast and tell each other how right you are and how the newer members are just whiners...or call in the reinforcements and close the thread, delete the post, etc. Sure wish those reinforcements would cancel accounts for those of you who have nothing better to do than come on this board and in more than half of your posts in a week just throw sarcasm and attempted superiority at those you disagree with. I can't wait to read the words of wisdom those of you write after this post because it is burning so bad in you that you just have to reply to feel better about yourself and show everyone how smart you are.

[Sinergy 3]

"If there are asylees in this country who were victims of political oppression in their homeland, and the US government wants to make some exception to process their cases prior to family based cases, that is admirable in my opinion.

Being separated from your boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse a few weeks longer in order to save removal of persons who might possibly be sent back home to tyrannical governments should not be a reason for outrage".

I have to agree with RebeccaJo on this one.

It is not easy to have to wait through the USCIS process. I for one was not happy with the process, however, I do believe that those in NEED should have some priority.

It is not different to being TRIAGED at the ER. Heart Attacks should and do go before ear aches.

If we were being set aside for back ups do to their own accord that is different.

There is a reason why they are Asylees and if we can help then we should. If the way we help is letting them be a step ahead then it is all good.

We may have to wait a bit longer (not easy I for one know this), but at least we are safe and our loved ones are safe.

oh ok cool. currently there are a few thousand Iraqi asylees in Syria looking to get a visa to come to the usa. I figure its only a year to process them then sure, we wont mind them getting to our petitions. And i think that most of the cuban petitions put to the front are given an interview in switzerland, not cuba. I dont mind waiting for asylees, but i do mind waiting on ineffiecnt government #######. cutting the service centers down to 2 when they already had a backlog before the fee increase was the worst decision. They are a business just like any other and i can complain all i want if i so choose to. they are responsible for their decisions to their paying customers. And thats what we are, even on their own website. Customers...

Chris

The worst part is that they RAISED the prices so damn much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For what...to close down centers and slow down the process!!!!

I was separated from my fiance for 5 months, is my opinion worthy enough for VJ? My interview took 151 days from filing - hope that's good enough!

I have been separated for over 4 months without even receiving my NOA2!!! so 5 months doesnot even seem realistic, for me or for the many others with the same predicament!!

And i was apart from my husband for a year and a half, and had a baby by myself and our interview took 174 days from filing, it dont matter how long a person has waited, still opinions matter, whether going thru the process or already gone thru it.

[Fandango 1,439]

Lashing out at each other is not going to make processing times faster.

Everyone needs to chill. Waiting sucks...that's a given.

[BYRON-LEIDY 0]

You are absolutely right...but everyone should be allowed to vent and let out frustratio without being told to stop complaining

[Sinergy 3]

Lashing out at each other is not going to make processing times faster.

Everyone needs to chill. Waiting sucks...that's a given.

everyday there is a new thread on processing times, the time it takes, then bashing members when told its normal and they will hear something soon.

i also want to add to whoever cant remember said to contact their congressman and senator and things will get better. not true, they will only help if you are far out of your processing time.

oi i shoulda stayed in bed (home sick with measles)

[Fandango 1,439]

You are absolutely right...but everyone should be allowed to vent and let out frustratio without being told to stop complaining

Vent, sure...but getting in this cycle of bullsh!t is counterproductive.

YES IT SUCKS. YES SOME PEOPLE WERE PROCESSED QUICKER.

But it's no one's fault (here at VJ) for why things are the way they are. People need to find some sort of outlet for their frustrations...whether it IS some sort of campaign for change, or it's a hobby or something else to distract.

And before anyone starts on me...I've waited (and am waiting) plenty..so don't even go there.

Tara....measels?!?!?!

[Sinergy 3]

You are absolutely right...but everyone should be allowed to vent and let out frustratio without being told to stop complaining

Vent, sure...but getting in this cycle of bullsh!t is counterproductive.

YES IT SUCKS. YES SOME PEOPLE WERE PROCESSED QUICKER.

But it's no one's fault (here at VJ) for why things are the way they are. People need to find some sort of outlet for their frustrations...whether it IS some sort of campaign for change, or it's a hobby or something else to distract.

And before anyone starts on me...I've waited (and am waiting) plenty..so don't even go there.

Tara....measels?!?!?!

yea go figure, im 31 and i caught them, have no clue how, the kids are fine

also, if ppl can just remember what im good at repeating over and over

VJ MEMBERS ARE NOT THE ONLY ONES GOING THRU THE PROCESS. you may have filed in first week of july, but 3,000 other ppl could have filed the day before you, and someone on VJ filed 4 days before those other ppl. read up on USCIS, get to know about it abit, then maybe the understanding will be more clear. i understand the processing times, it sucks,but omg, lets stop this everyday drama, fighting, who is better and who sucks BS.

[BYRON-LEIDY 0]

like i said , VJ is heaven for all of going through this process....someone brought up a very good analogy earlier.

If thousands of people protest Iraq and nothing happens , why would anything be done if a couple af hundred , if even that many, VJ members protest against the Immigration policy or process......DXont get me wrong im p for doing anything but imnot getting my hopes up!

Oh and LisaD....go where??? nothing was being directed towards you...I wasn't " lashing out" at you