Hindu beneficiary/non-South Asian petitioner

[Imua 0]

It's a lazy Saturday afternoon, and I remembered a question I wanted to ask. When I went to the KTM Embassy to get the Affidavit which I needed to get married in Nepal, the CO gave us a mini-interview(which I was not expecting; I flubbed G's birth year when the CO asked me, hope she didn't write it down!!!) She asked how we met and I told her about our first meeting at the Mandir where I did puja that morning. She asked, 'Oh, are you Hindu?' and seemed pleased when I answered yes - I was also wearing a salwar kameez(like every day ) and bindi(since we were engaged at that point). I am mentioning religion in our petition since it is unusual for Hindus to marry non-Hindus and it would be assumed since I am Euro-American I am not Hindu(a lot of born Hindus also think the same, regardless of what I say, but that is not the issue here). I also practice Buddhism, like many Nepalis I have a shrine with statues of both Ganesh and Buddha. I am wondering if this issue has come up for any Hindus marrying non-South Asians and if talking about my Hindu faith will help our case. I am even attaching a copy of the certificate when I was given my Hindu name at the Mandir in Queens(2 years before I met G, so CIS will know it wasn't done in order to impress him).

Edited September 22, 2007 by Pattu Rani

[ELW 5]

Hiya don't you love lazy Saturday afternoons! Though I just spent the last few hours preparing 2 different veggies (eggplant fry and ridge gourd with tomatoes & spices) and pulav (or is it biryani.. and what is the difference ?!).

Ok anyway, first of all, religion did NOT come up at my hubby's interview in Chennai, even though all the pics of us together showed me in sari with bindi (and with pics of Ganesh & Vishnu in the background of my room ).

I think that mentioning that you are a Hindu is a good idea, it further shows that you are serious and committed, and you two share the same beliefs (which is considered a big PLUS anywhere in the world, especially in South Asia!).

By the way, how are you doing in gathering all those pesky documents?

And have you considered filing for the IR1/CR1 visa? I don't know much about it, except there is no need to file AOS after coming here, and a green card and SSN is all taken care of automatically, soon after arriving.

[chri'stina 190]

I don't remember how but religion did come up at hubby's interview. I am not sure if it was because there were pics of my dad with Sujeet in India and the interviewer asked about my dad, who was he. Sujeet told him he(my dad) is a pastor. I think that's how it came up. The interviewer asked if Sujeet was a Christian, and he answered yes, and then the interviewer asked what part of the bible he liked most. That could have been a test, not sure, but Sujeet did answer what part he liked and the interviewer seemed happy to get a real answer. It was a bit different that Sujeet was a Christian in India since his name is Hindu, and you know how they assume what religion you are by your first/last name. So it's good if you want to say you share the same religion if they don't think so.

I don't know if it's come up very often for others. Sharing the same religion seems like it would make the case stronger.

[maya62 7]

Religion did not come up at S's interview, but I did mention as part of my answer to the infamous question 18 (on the I-129F) that I was visiting Nepal originally due in part to my interest in Buddhism. At least one of the pictures we submitted was taken inside the Buddhist temple at Swoyambhu (by the man who is the caretaker there) and both of us are doing namaste. And as part of preparing S for his interview, we discussed the fact that a question might arise about religion and that it was one thing we have in common (even though the Buddhism I had been practicing for about 5 years and up til we met was more Mahayana/Zen and his is Very Vajryana ).

I think you guys are ALL OVER the religion question and I would make sure they know it. I bet there is a note somewhere, maybe pinned to their copy of your Affidavit of Eligibilty to Marry, about your exchange with the CO about your religion, and maybe even about what you were wearing.

Just curious... was G allowed inside the Consulate? S was not (on my first visit, but then again, he didn't have a passport at that point).

Maya

Edited September 24, 2007 by maya62

[trinket 30]

First of all sorry to be bumping onto an old post , but reading this made me think for a bit.

Here is the thing, I am a born Hindu, I have never in my life worn a Bindi other than on our wedding day. I am Bengali, and in our custom, married woman is ought to wear some red & white bangles and sindoor. Again I don’t wear those. What I wear are my wedding ring and a gold bangle which has another crust of iron inside it (it’s another Bengali custom).

My husband is white, and he is more into Hindu religion than I am, though we first met online through Yahoo's Hinduism chat room, but our views on religion are different. He is more of a Bhakti marga kind of a guy, where as I am more of an Advaitya kind of a girl. I don't believe in rituals.

Well what I am wondering is, I know its going to be something in a long run(slap myself and remind to stop making future plans already ), but whenever in months to come or may be in a year to come, and I have to go to Chennai for my interview, should I be the good Indian girl, wearing Sindoor a nd a Sari(again, worn that thing only 4 or 5 times in this 25 years of my life on earth) or should I just be me?

Edited March 11, 2008 by silent

[CarolynRitesh 0]

First of all sorry to be bumping onto an old post , but reading this made me think for a bit.

Here is the thing, I am a born Hindu, I have never in my life worn a Bindi other than on our wedding day. I am Bengali, and in our custom, married woman is ought to wear some red & white bangles and sindoor. Again I don’t wear those. What I wear are my wedding ring and a gold bangle which has another crust of iron inside it (it’s another Bengali custom).

My husband is white, and he is more into Hindu religion than I am, though we first met online through Yahoo's Hinduism chat room, but our views on religion are different. He is more of a Bhakti marga kind of a guy, where as I am more of an Advaitya kind of a girl. I don't believe in rituals.

Well what I am wondering is, I know its going to be something in a long run(slap myself and remind to stop making future plans already ), but whenever in months to come or may be in a year to come, and I have to go to Chennai for my interview, should I be the good Indian girl, wearing Sindoor a nd a Sari(again, worn that thing only 4 or 5 times in this 25 years of my life on earth) or should I just be me?

Hi Silent,

I am probably not the right person to answer this, but my feeling is to just be yourself. I think in both India (more and more these days!) and in the US there is more room for that, and remember, you are going to be interviewed by an American, and you are married to an American who is a convert to Hinduism... I have a feeling that this is all coming out the wrong way!! Anyway, wear the clothes and symbolic things that are important to you, not what you think someone else will think you should wear. I love saris, but would not be my most comfortable wearing one to an interview in Chennai and that discomfort might translate into something else for an interviewer - know what I mean?

My husband is a jeans and black t-shirt wearing kind of guy, he will be a bit more formal than that at the interview, but I think he would be very uncomfortable in more traditional clothes or even a kurta, and the last thing you want to do when you are already nervous is be uncomfortable!

Good luck, I can't wait to hear the news that you have made it through and are on your way!

For the original poster, enjoy your trip to Nepal - I wish I could arrange for 6 weeks off to go there, it looks sooooo amazing!

[Nikita2Charles 32]

I would say be yourself, my fiancee wore her casual clothes when she went for the interview. Basics stuff they ask, where i was born, my dad's name, where I work at, and from my passport they could see i had been to india so many times, it was a walk in the park.

Edited March 13, 2008 by Nikita2Charles

[trinket 30]

Thanks guys

I definitely am not thinking of being way too casual with jeans but a saree with sindoor and bangles will be too much for me.

A nice salwar will be good enough

Thanks again

[Imua 0]

Sorry to be late to the party(Nepali time - LOL ) but yes, I agree, just wear what you feel comfortable in - either SK or a nice pair of jeans and a shirt would be OK. I love SK because they are comfy and feel casual but can look very dressy and traditional without 'trying too hard'. You could even wear a kurti with jeans - my SIL's uniform.

CarolynRitesh,

Thanks for your good wishes - yes, you should definitely visit Nepal, for such a small country there is so much to see and do - I have visited 3 times and still haven't visited all of the main sites in the Kathmandu valley!