How is your SO adjusting?

[LovinLiberia 0]

Hello everyone, I'm just curious as to how everyone's SO's are adjusting to life here in the US. Mmarlo, how is Jacinta? Safitu, what about your SO? I would love to hear an update on anyone else's SO's who arrived within the past few months. Any cute first-discovery stories to share?

[akatagirl 0]

My hubby arrived mid March but then left again 2 weeks ago (he had to go back for work but will be back in December)..Well when he first got here, he definitely found everything we do here compared to other places he's lived (Greece, Turkey, Cyprus and West Africa) quite different. He used to say there are too many choices when it came down to things such as cereal, lotion, etc... He used to even laugh cause it seemed that even our utensils and cups were supersized. The buffets definitely tripped him out cause in Europe they do not have anything where its all-you-can eat. The traffic rules and all the stop signs we have out here were really confusing to him at first... He also to find where I live in the suburbs too quite and often found it strange that there are no taxis to be found. He does enjoy all the shopping malls we have out here and all the outlets we have! He also likes the fact that most major department stores have a return policy cause he's never had that option before. The high rise buildings he was in awe of!! He also tripped out at how people out here are really into those big ear piericings which basically put gaping holes in their ears...One guy caught him staring at him and was a little upset!!

[taurean 0]

I guess I can chime in here. My husband has been here for about six months now and the adjustment gets easier everyday. The hardest thing for him was being idle so long waiting for the EAD to come. He's used to working all the time! The adjustment has been so much easier after he started working. The biggest thing he has noticed is the "size" of most Americans. He is amazed that there is food anywhere, anytime, anyplace here. He also thinks everything is SO big. I live in a fairly small state (MD) but when we're driving somewhere, he's like it's SOOOO big!! I have to laugh everytime he says this. And he swears he will never get a decent haircut here. I think he's ready to sponsor his barber at home to come over and cut his hair!!

[Ta Ta 1]

And after the barber is here Princessmetzger will be relieved to send Booker to him too, right Shaun ? We were just talking about the hair cutting thing.

[Perseverance 1]

We are doing ok, I have to agree that the waiting for EAD is hard. Sometimes he gets a little stir crazy. We got him a weight set and so he has something to do now. We found a Nigerian Market here in Denver and that helped with the food issue. Kids are home for the summer so he does not have any peace anymore...But really all in all I would say he is adjusting quite well.

[LovinLiberia 0]

LOL, yes the barber will be a big thing with Booker, he is completely ####### about his haircuts and who cuts them.

Thanks for those updates, I'm glad to see everyone is adjusting well. I can't wait to see what my fiance's first moments will be like when he's here.

[forchika 4]

My hubby is adjusting well.....we were able to get married, file for SSN and open accounts at the bank and get the driver's permit with out any problems. He was also able to find several local markets here to buy food. He spent the first 3mos updating resume and going on job interviews, nothing turned up as he came with temp EAD which is okay, as that was to be expected but, wanted to at least try to see if he could get something temporary. He made a very good friend with someone from east Nigeria that came thru the visa lottery and they were able to move around together looking for work. I think the most difficult part is being idle as we are now waiting for AOS/EAD approval. The wait will be over soon as our AOS interview is scheduled on Aug. 22nd, we are just looking forward to getting an immigration break for a while and being able to move forward with life. He likes it here in Atlanta.....says its beautiful as we have alot of flowers, forestry, and trees. He likes the way we drive here!!!!!! I think his biggest suprise was seeing all the homeless people in the downtown area sleeping on the ground and under bridges unfortunately poverty is here too in America whether buy choice or not. Can not think of any new cute discovery stories at the moment, if I do I will be sure to post again.

[wileastmot 0]

Funny that you would mention barber. Wilmot was the barber for most of his friends back home. It is funny to see how happy they are to have him hear and that he can cut thier hair.

Anyway he seems to be adjusting fine, but he hates all of the sitting around and I know he will be much happier when he is working. He also can not help but notice how big people are in the US and how much food we have here.

Rhonda

[reeses16 8]

My hubby is doing well. I think the EAD wait is the worst part. He's bored out of his mind! So he's trying to occupy his time. Studying for his driving test and spending time with my family.

[NaijaPrincess Need NaijaPrince 0]

Well my SO tends to complain about EVERYTHING!!! --from the food we eat to the taxes we pay. One day he is shouting I love American and the next he wants to go back home. Overall, it has been a struggle for him and for me. Especially for my son and him. Childrearing is very different here. All in all it will work out. I have the faith that he will become Americanized one day!!!

[JJWashington 0]

My hubby is doing well. I think the EAD wait is the worst part. He's bored out of his mind! So he's trying to occupy his time. Studying for his driving test and spending time with my family.

How long do they have to wait to work once they arrive?

[reeses16 8]

JJWashington,

There is no set time to get an EAD. But if it has been more than 90 days since the application was submitted you can go to a local USCIS office and request a EAD stamp. A biometeric appointment is neccesary before the EAD is issued. So when you get your appointment at least you know you're a little closer. Hope this helped.

My hubby is doing well. I think the EAD wait is the worst part. He's bored out of his mind! So he's trying to occupy his time. Studying for his driving test and spending time with my family.

How long do they have to wait to work once they arrive?

[boo boo 1]

Charles is doing good here...I think he thought that he would be doing better (getting a good job and making more money in a SHORT period of time). His mind is always going 100mile/minute. It can be overwhelming at times...but I know that he is on a mission...so I try to be supportive.

Charles has a Bachelor's in Geology from a University in Nigeria and a Master's in Environmental Resource Management from Europe....but he had no luck in finding any job in those fields....I feel like he should not give up.....but he has and now wants to go into nursing...and will start school in afew weeks to get a degree for an RN...and he is also going to go to a 12week program to be a nursing assistant. I will be happy when he can finally be at peace and happy w/ what he is doing...workwise

He thinks FL is hotter then Nigeria...he hasn't met any real friends yet....but he stays pretty busy and active...that it hasn't really affected him. He talks on the phone alot and goes on computer alot to talk to family and friends. He loves soccer, but hasn't found anyone to play with.....I see men playing it all the time....but they speak no English (only spanish)...so Charles is unable to communicate w/ them. I did get satelite so he can watch England leagues play on tv.

He does miss afew dishes (bitter leaf soup mainly) and has not adapted to American meals...he still eats alot of his foods..one day he will adjust (I am not giving up).

He is slowly adjusting...and seems to be taking everything in....and he is coming to understand the American ways of life. I will always be his biggest fan and support him in any way that I am capable of....because when you think about it....he left everything that he had to come here and be w/ me and I am all he has here....and I know that he will have those rough days, those sad days...and alot of good days...but I am hoping in the end..we will have built something beautiful and enduring.....and can look back and remember where it all started. Patience is a virtue....and you have to be sensitive and understanding more then you are used to

[onwa 6]

My husband has been here just over two years. Our second wedding anniversery is in a few weeks. We just bought our first house together. And in those two short years he managed to establish a good credit and work history and he is the main borrower on the loan instead of me--the USC--I'm still having a hard time figuring it out.

We both have jobs we love and that helps alot. The rest of it has been learning to mesh two lives together and that Atlantic ocean can sure mean there are alot of differences to come to communicate about and come to agreement to. I sure do respect and appreciate all he does for me. I'm glad we didn't give up on each other during the rough times. I am so very grateful he is my husband.

[NigerianLove 0]

Mine is not here yet (just two more weeks), but in a lot of ways I don't want him to become Americanized. I want him to adjust just like I adjusted to his country. However, I fell in love with him because of the values he has. All the African men I know (quite a few) believe in taking care of home. No offense to American Black men, but the ones I have encountered are intimidated by a woman that is highly educated, which I have never understood. However, my fiance loves and admires the fact that I am educated (we know what education means to Africans). There is no argument about who's the man and him feeling inferior because I have 2 1/2 pieces of paper that says I can do something. He knows that he is the man and I respect every aspect of his personality. I'm like Jill Scott's song I Still Need You. I can take care of myself, but some things still require a man!

Sorry if I got off topic some, but point is I want him to adjust to our society without losing his traditional African values.

My husband has been here just over two years. Our second wedding anniversery is in a few weeks. We just bought our first house together. And in those two short years he managed to establish a good credit and work history and he is the main borrower on the loan instead of me--the USC--I'm still having a hard time figuring it out.

We both have jobs we love and that helps alot. The rest of it has been learning to mesh two lives together and that Atlantic ocean can sure mean there are alot of differences to come to communicate about and come to agreement to. I sure do respect and appreciate all he does for me. I'm glad we didn't give up on each other during the rough times. I am so very grateful he is my husband.