Where to write' "Do not canclel petition" letter -at USCIS

[ding 1]

We worked it out. But not before I decided I had to let go and cancell our K-1. Pretty embarassing, but it took what it took. I figured I tried all I could, but had to accept she was just that way -and let it go. Anyway, she hit bottom on the whole lying thing and here we go again:

Where can I write to the USCIS to "please disregard the request to cancel"?

The NVC already sent me a letter last week saying they sent my request to cancel to the USCIS.

It's odd that the NVC letter said to contact the Bangkok Embassy with further inquiries.

I'm pretty sure we have to refile with a waiver request. I spoke to customer service and the officer said "You probably shot yourself in the foot". I bit my lip and refrained from saying "Yeah, but someone else was holding the gun!"

Anybody know how this sort of thing goes?

[poppscc 0]

what was the deception that led to the breakup in the first place? If you gut led you to cancel the first time around, you need to trust your gut and not second guess it. Sometimes these things need time to unravel, and going back to your fiance right away may not be the best thing to do. Start your process over and see how your fiance reacts, or tell her you need to start over.

[Lance27 19]

Agreed

what was the deception that led to the breakup in the first place? If you gut led you to cancel the first time around, you need to trust your gut and not second guess it. Sometimes these things need time to unravel, and going back to your fiance right away may not be the best thing to do. Start your process over and see how your fiance reacts, or tell her you need to start over.

[ding 1]

That's good advice, I agree. It's a bit long and complicated. It was my gut that caused me to ask some questions when things didn't add up. My gut was right, she was lying... a lot. But she lied about nothing big, just lots of needless lies. Maybe the only questionable thing was her regularly talking with her ex-boyfriend, but I was never worried about that/him. Still it was just all the lying in the end, and it didn't stop after I told her my feelings again about honesty and trust. So I eventually decided to accept the facts and let it go.

Thais often lie to not lose face, to avoid conflict, and to just take the easy way. I knew this and thought we talked it out. I was mistaken.

She didn't REALLY understand that westerners need the truth more than not hearing "not nice things". She's never done anything bad in her life. Funny thing is, I told her ALL my baggage and still she hid what was going on in her life. Also, she's 39 and never in a committed relationship before. She works 6 days a week to send money to her mom upcountry. She never experienced having someone in her life like this.

She loves me deeply and it depressed her a lot. She really hit bottom on the lying and came clean. She isn't lying anymore either, and my gut agrees 100%

I agree, listen to your gut.

[mRx 16]

Ding, you know your fiancee better than anyone on VJ does. If you decide to resume the relationship, then more power to you, bro.

As for the "Do not cancel petition letter", I have never read of a similar situation on VJ, but I would assume that you would have to refile all over again and possibly apply for a waiver because you will have submitted 2 petitions within 2 years. However I am not sure if the rule would differ since it is the same person you are applying for. This may be a question to take to an immigration attorney.

Best of luck to you Ding.

[ding 1]

btw

I sent here, just a guess;

CSC

P.O. Box 10130

Laguna Niguel, CA 92607-1013

[nate&nid 0]

That's good advice, I agree. It's a bit long and complicated. It was my gut that caused me to ask some questions when things didn't add up. My gut was right, she was lying... a lot. But she lied about nothing big, just lots of needless lies. Maybe the only questionable thing was her regularly talking with her ex-boyfriend, but I was never worried about that/him. Still it was just all the lying in the end, and it didn't stop after I told her my feelings again about honesty and trust. So I eventually decided to accept the facts and let it go.

Thais often lie to not lose face, to avoid conflict, and to just take the easy way. I knew this and thought we talked it out. I was mistaken.

She didn't REALLY understand that westerners need the truth more than not hearing "not nice things". She's never done anything bad in her life. Funny thing is, I told her ALL my baggage and still she hid what was going on in her life. Also, she's 39 and never in a committed relationship before. She works 6 days a week to send money to her mom upcountry. She never experienced having someone in her life like this.

She loves me deeply and it depressed her a lot. She really hit bottom on the lying and came clean. She isn't lying anymore either, and my gut agrees 100%

I agree, listen to your gut.

A Thai woman not lying anymore is like saying water is not wet anymore ... she cannot change who she is. But you already know this, and you really should not force Western values, culture, and belief on her after 39 years of being a Thai woman. Getting married thinking that you will change her is wishful thinking, not very realistic. If you want a long happy life with her, you need to ACCEPT that you are choosing to marry a Thai woman - she will do this over and over again. Her fun-loving, conflict-avoiding nature is deeply engrained in her, it was instilled in her from the day she was born.

You need to focus on how deeply you love her and trust her, and how deeply she loves you and trusts you. I would venture to guess (from my own experiences with Nid over the last 2+ years) much of the time her lying will be because she does NOT want to hurt you, she does NOT want you to worry, she does NOT want to make you sad. The emotional dilemma is that when she lies, you are hurt, you do worry, and you are sad. You need to resolve this in your head and your heart before you decide to continue down this path, you need to accept this and learn to savor it, or your relationship will be endless turmoil. Delight in the fact she is 100% Thai.

[payxibka 10,045]

Since your petition was approved by the USCIS and was forwarded to NVC, why did you send your cancellation to USCIS?

[billsafari 0]

Make some calls. Forget the letters unless they request it.

[TracyTN 237]

Since your petition was approved by the USCIS and was forwarded to NVC, why did you send your cancellation to USCIS?

I believe the NVC sent it to the USCIS.

The NVC already sent me a letter last week saying they sent my request to cancel to the USCIS.

It's odd that the NVC letter said to contact the Bangkok Embassy with further inquiries.