Marrying a Muslim

[balmytigeress 0]

Or tell me where I can find them listed. So I'm not surprised by how other people react.

My step-sister told me that the others think "you don't know what you're getting into."

Of course they also don't know I've converted (before I met him, BTW). It is not something they will accept easily. For the most part I've met others' expectations on me, but in this I cannot. That's what makes it hard.

In some cases, perhaps I can show "them" that actually I do know what I'm getting into, and it's not quite as they think. Other things, I can't do anything about, and "they" can just think whatever they like.

Things like:

-if you visit his country with him after you get married, he won't let you leave

-he'll beat you

-you won't be allowed out of the house

-i'll never see you again because you will be be totally covered up

-polygamy

-everything you own will be his

-etc

BT

[Nasturtium 500]

-he will kidnap you

-he will kidnap your children

I actually got someone telling me "OMG! He will kidnap you AND your children!"

I was like.. sooo.... you're saying he'll kidnap me (right) and my children (yes!!) to the same place (umm, well), which means I don't have to pay for moving? (but!) Yeah, that's cool.

-you need to watch that film "Not without my daughter!"

-he will never let you work

-he will force you to convert

-he will own you

-he will marry you then dump you for a real Muslim woman

You pretty much covered them all though! You hear all this kind of thing so often in the beginning, but then you more or less somehow get out of it (mostly). I know for me, when people learn I've been there 5 times and we've been married a year and a half, and especially how we met and that we share the same dicipline and have published together-- it seems to ease their thoughts.

(of course then you get stellar remarks like from my mom today: "Oh well, if he likes chocolate covered carmel he can't be 100% bad." And yes, that's exactly how she meant it. He's now only 99% bad.)

[Moe_lisa 0]

Here is the biggest one of all....because he is a muslim he must be a terrorist!!!!

Some people just are not accepting of something out of their norm. Just laugh and shake your head. Know in your heart you are happy!

[jade2004 0]

-When you go there he will sell you to make babies for them so all of them can get over here if they have an american child

-I can't believe you are going to marry the ''enemy''...our soldiers are over there fighting against these people

-He isn't going to let you celebrate the holidays with your family (I am Christian--him Muslim)

All of this just makes me laugh now to see how small minded people can be in this world. My mom was actually the first person in our town to have a ''bi-racial'' child and be married to a different race and back then they actually would chase them and threaten to shoot them, so I guess it COULD actually be worse than just the ''talk''....

I just always ask them...''is it illegal to marry someone from a different country and a different religion"?? If not, then you have no point to prove to me!

Keep your head up honey...they eventually find someone else to be the topic of conversation....

[Nagishkaw 510]

I can add to that list.

He probably runs a brothel.

He is a pedophile. ( I have no children, and he is 24 years my junior )

He's a dirty Arab.

If you visit him, you will come home in a body bag.

He has 100 aliases, you don't even know his real name.

He is a terrorist and a spy.

:rolleyes:

[doodlebug 3]

my mom asked if I was going to blow her up.

I told her if she plays her cards right I *might* not.

Others:

- He'll make you wear a burkah

- He'll beat you and your kids

- You won't be able to come back once you go over there (already been so proved them wrong already on that one)

- He's gonna be one of them sleeper cells

A funny one, and proof of how ignorant my family is, is when my mom presented me with a wedding gift of sorts once I got back home. She came over and gave me this tiny elephant and said she tried to read about what direction it's supposed to face but couldn't find it anywhere so maybe I should call my husband and ask him where to put the elephant.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

you guys got some BAD friends and family no one has ever told me any of that stuff> the terrorist thing is the public now in general just thinking everyone is alike. Guess im lucky my friends and family cant wait to meet him.

[Nagishkaw 510]

I informed my mother that I assure her when we come for a visit, I will be sure to instruct my fiance to leave his grenade pack and rocket launcher in the car.

[LaL 418]

she tried to read about what direction it's supposed to face but couldn't find it anywhere so maybe I should call my husband and ask him where to put the elephant.

i was told the elephant's bootay was supposed to face the door.

[Together4ever 1]

You guys so forgot the BIG ONE:

HE'S JUST USING YOU FOR A GREEN CARD

[lion_lioness 0]

You guys so forgot the BIG ONE:

HE'S JUST USING YOU FOR A GREEN CARD

Jean - I'm busting out laughing at work LOLOLOLOL - thanks for a great laugh.

Doodle - I've heard the "not without my daughter" bid a thousand times with my ex husband - no one dares to say a word now.

And Dirty - well if you know Islam you'll know that's impossible (that's a good come back!)

It's just ridiculous, don't even sweat it. You're in love and that's the important thing!!

[Aymerlu 3]

Let's see. Yes, I've heard "

1. Have you seen Not Without My Daughter"

2. Let me look at your face because when you start covering it we'll never see you again.

3. Have many family members does he have over here? He's just coming to be with them you know. (HA, he has NO family here)

4. You know they don't let woman have any freedom.

5. He'll cut your tongue out when you sass him. (What ME sass? )

6. I'll give the marriage 2 years tops.

7. He's going to make you wear one of those thingys. (burka)

I'm sure I'll think of more later.

[deemabrouk 0]

You guys so forgot the BIG ONE:

HE'S JUST USING YOU FOR A GREEN CARD

Yup thats the biggest one I've heard... that and the "Well how do you know he is NOT a terrorist??!!"

and I used to think that the "Not Without My Daughter" was a good one... BUT now i think is was way to damaging...

[brnidokiegurl 0]

whoops got to turn my herd of elephants other direction then, i brought a grouping large to small (or were you all jokeing and it went over my head) ha

[jade2004 0]

I am just so thankful to have been introduced to this site and hear all of your experiences it really helps alot...it has actually eased up alot since I came back from my month's stay in Jordan. Guess they realized that I came back safe and sound so what else could they say. My mom has been supportive the entire time as long as he treats me well--but, just as long as he is good to me and my little girl...it doesn't matter to me what anyone thinks!

Thanks for the laughs, I enjoyed this thread