What if you donnot like your SO's country...

[Henia 11]

hello I rather like Algerie and my in-laws but have heard several complaints from others on another baord I am on about not lking their SO's country and in-laws...

My thoughts:

Well if you did not like the country, why get a SO from there....and about the in-laws... they married the man/women...and also the family...deal with it... patient people are generally rewared for their patience.

[Alex+R 0]

hello I rather like Algerie and my in-laws but have heard several complaints from others on another baord I am on about not lking their SO's country and in-laws...

My thoughts:

Well if you did not like the country, why get a SO from there ....and about the in-laws... they married the man/women...and also the family...deal with it... patient people are generally rewared for their patience.

Hi, I'm not ME/NA, but I don't really understand this (the bolded part). If I were in love with Brazil, not my boyfriend, then I would just move to Brazil. But I'm in love with the GUY. What do the two things have to do with one another? Just because a place produces something or someone we love does not mean we have to love that place.

My best friend is from North Dakota. Does that mean I have to like NoDak?

[Jenn! 918]

Well if you did not like the country, why get a SO from there....

Hmmm, well many people do not choose a country first and subsequently choose an SO from that country.

There are things about Morocco that I'm not too crazy about.

[Henia 11]

hello I rather like Algerie and my in-laws but have heard several complaints from others on another baord I am on about not lking their SO's country and in-laws...

My thoughts:

Well if you did not like the country, why get a SO from there ....and about the in-laws... they married the man/women...and also the family...deal with it... patient people are generally rewared for their patience.

Hi, I'm not ME/NA, but I don't really understand this (the bolded part). If I were in love with Brazil, not my boyfriend, then I would just move to Brazil. But I'm in love with the GUY. What do the two things have to do with one another? Just because a place produces something or someone we love does not mean we have to love that place.

My best friend is from North Dakota. Does that mean I have to like NoDak?

No, what I meant is: If you found a person you want to be with supposely all your life...but you didnt like their country (for the most part) would it not mean you did not like them either? I know peopl are different ...but you cannot change your roots I think.

Also jenn: I know people including me do not pick a country then go looking for their mates...but I am curious to know what everyone thinks. And I myself donnot think I could love my husband and not his country..but some people do.

Edited December 31, 2006 by Henia

[Jenn! 918]

Well, Wadi and I had been together for more than two years before I got to go to Morocco. Even if I had absolutely hated the country, I can't imagine ending the relationship over that.

I suppose it depends on the level of dislike and how much it bothers your SO.

Maybe it would help to have some examples of people not liking their SO's country. I'm finding it hard to imagine having enough dislike for a country to make that a deal-breaker in a relationship.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

Although Morocco is very different to anything im used to I enjoyed the time there and can't wait to go back. Live there, not sure of that one, since work is limited and me with the language but at sometime we talk about having houses in both places. The family is great and accepted me from first day as i them.

If you didnt get along with the family feel like that would be putting SO in the middle all the time maybe causing little friction and of course they are going to want to go back for visits and bring you along.

[Ta Ta 1]

Love my man....love his country...love the people.

Though I would probably die an early death there, it will always be special and magical to me. A beautiful country with a lot of problems.

TIA......one of the roughest places to live. It was on the very bottom of the UN list

a few years ago and is now 3. from the bottom, struggling to rise up after a decade of

brutal war.

His country is part of what has shaped him. How could I not embrace it ?

If someone does not like their SO's country.....look deeper.

[frndly1 1]

I dont think I would live in Morocco also but I would go back for short visits. I get along with my husbands family. I will so they have some customs/traditions that I dont quite understand but hey.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I wouldn't say that I love Morocco. I still love Hicham though and that wouldn't change based on how much or little I enjoy Morocco.

[mybackpages 0]

hello I rather like Algerie and my in-laws but have heard several complaints from others on another baord I am on about not lking their SO's country and in-laws...

My thoughts:

Well if you did not like the country, why get a SO from there ....and about the in-laws... they married the man/women...and also the family...deal with it... patient people are generally rewared for their patience.

Hi, I'm not ME/NA, but I don't really understand this (the bolded part). If I were in love with Brazil, not my boyfriend, then I would just move to Brazil. But I'm in love with the GUY. What do the two things have to do with one another? Just because a place produces something or someone we love does not mean we have to love that place.

My best friend is from North Dakota. Does that mean I have to like NoDak?

No, what I meant is: If you found a person you want to be with supposely all your life...but you didnt like their country (for the most part) would it not mean you did not like them either? I know peopl are different ...but you cannot change your roots I think.

Also jenn: I know people including me do not pick a country then go looking for their mates...but I am curious to know what everyone thinks. And I myself donnot think I could love my husband and not his country..but some people do.

I think I understood exactly what you meant. It seems strange to me that some people can be married to someone when they have no desire or appreciation for the SO's country and traditions. I think there are some people who have an expectation that the SO will more likely conform to their way of life.

I met a man who married a woman from Vietnam. They met online, she came here on a fiance visa. He complained to me that everything she cooked had so many vegatables and he wished she would eat meat and potatoes like him. I had to laugh because I thought to myself I would love someone to come and cook this for me everyday. I really think he was execting her Vietnamese culture not be such a dominate part of who she was.

And the in-laws thing I just do not understand how anyone marries someone without understnding they are marrying into the family too.

ETA: I am one of those who fell in love with the country before I met my fiance. I was making plans to move permantly there before we decided to marry. I guess you could say I'm using him to make it easy to move there

Edited December 31, 2006 by mybackpages

[sarah and hicham 3]

I am happy to learn and appreciate Moroccan culture. I don't necessarily like a lot of things about Morocco however I respect Hicham and appreciate his upbringing and culture.

[cbd2cai 0]

I met my husband on my 2nd trip to Egypt . . . so I guess I was fascinated with Egypt before I met him. For awhile after I married him, I thought about the possibility that I'd go to live in Egypt. Now I am having a Love-Hate relationship with it, because of all the things that I have learned . . . so sometimes I want to go and somtimes I dont ever want to go again. He just laughs when I say that . . . but sometimes he also says he hates Egypt and I now understand why.

[Visa4habibi! 0]

Henia, you got me thinking...

I could say I love Morocco and almost everything Moroccan, that would be true. Now I cook Moroccan, have Moroccan tapes in my car... what else? Planning to re-do my bedroom, so it looks Moroccan at least a little.... Any advice from anybody?

I wouldn't live there, at least not now. But I could adjust to it - it would be like going back in time, way back in time. I used to live that way (similar way) back where i'm from years ago.

But the funny part is - my husband! He constantly tells me that he doesn't like Moroccans (sometimes the word is 'hate'). And yet he keeps telling me, baby, i'm Moroccan! :lol: :lol:

I know he has his reasons , same as sometimes i'd say, i don't like russians (cause i know what most of them are about). Well, i ended up deffending him, even though he wouldn't even know i'm doing this. Man! I'm a good wife!!! Is there 'pat yourself on the back' smiley? :dance: That's the closest I could get!

[browneyez40 0]

And the in-laws thing I just do not understand how anyone marries someone without understnding they are marrying into the family too.

ETA: I am one of those who fell in love with the country before I met my fiance. I was making plans to move permantly there before we decided to marry. I guess you could say I'm using him to make it easy to move there

But you don't have to like your family (or in-laws) you just have to get along with them. Respecting and actually liking them are two different things.

[mybackpages 0]

And the in-laws thing I just do not understand how anyone marries someone without understnding they are marrying into the family too.

ETA: I am one of those who fell in love with the country before I met my fiance. I was making plans to move permantly there before we decided to marry. I guess you could say I'm using him to make it easy to move there

But you don't have to like your family (or in-laws) you just have to get along with them. Respecting and actually liking them are two different things.

I'll give you that. You are so right. I'm one of those people that the in-laws are an important deciding factor if I would or would not get married. I believe you do not marry a person but you marry a family. My fiance joins my family and I join his and even larger than that my family becomes part of his family and his family becomes part of mine.

I know - not every one thinks about family like us and not everyone wants family relations like us. But for me its important