Must I visit??

[IntoTheLight 5]

Just wanted to say that I'm seeing some great advice about meeting first. I'm currently visiting with my fiance for the 3rd time since we met online over a year ago and every visit has been different. The first one was sort of awkward in some ways, because you are first adding physical aspects to a distance relationship (even something as simple as being able to hug the other person). The second visit was exciting, but the first time we stayed together alone so there was a lot to get used to. The third, and current visit, is really quite awesome -- we've already gotten past any awkward moments, accepted each other's quirks, and it pretty much feels just like being home. Neither of us are in any way worried that it won't work when married now, but it really does take time to get there. Just like in a local relationship, getting married after a couple dates is rarely the best idea and will often lead to a bumpier road when it comes to adjusting to the fact that you are joining two completely separate, unique lives into one. Everyone has their own habits, likes, and dislikes. Marriage is about those complementing each other, or the ability to accept the parts that don't.

Even after visiting in person, there is still a vast difference when you have to go back to just text/video/phone. You think it is great now and you know the person, but there is so much you miss when you have to go back to it that it better shows what you were missing to begin with.

Good luck to you both, though. I hope it works out how you both wish.

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

A lawyer will not cost you less than $1500-$2000... Which is about what plane ticket will cost. Money better spent to visit than to pay for a lawyer to file a waiver that you have next to 0% chance of getting... So after paying the lawyer for the waiver, then having the waiver denied, you will STILL have to buy a plane ticket and go visit to fulfill the meet in 2 years requirement (with $1500 less in your pocket I might add)... So instead of trying to circumvent the system, just do what is required as I think you are just making things harder on yourself... And lawyers DO NOT speed up the process... Spend a bit more time reading info here on VJ and you will learn that. We are a DIY type of a group.... However, you seem stubbornly determined to do it "your way" however, you will learn that it is "USCIS's" way if you want success!

Absolutely positively right on

Rest your thinking and pay for a visit and not a lawyer who CANT speed up the process nor PRODUCE a waiver.

Trying to squeeze blood out of a turnip will not catapult you to your dreams. Read. Listen. Research.

[F&Z 8]

The lawyer I talked to today charges $750 for K1, start to finish, and does not seem near as pessimistic about a waiver as I am reading in this thread.

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

The lawyer I talked to today charges $750 for K1, start to finish, and does not seem near as pessimistic about a waiver as I am reading in this thread.

Then you will have to learn from experience. Good luck. You'll need it.

[christeen 966]

The lawyer I talked to today charges $750 for K1, start to finish, and does not seem near as pessimistic about a waiver as I am reading in this thread.

Of course they are not pessimistic... If they were, you wouldn't pay them... I saw from your other postings that along with the "not able to afford a ticket to fulfill the basic requirement to qualify for k-1 visa" you seem to have a few other possible red flags such as major age difference, short online only courtship and a somewhat higher fraud consulate. Although no one of these factors (aside from not meeting in person waiver which you have a snowballs chance in hell of getting), will disqualify you... If you look at it from the uscis point of view (that is a stranger seeing only paperwork in from of them) you would see that you are setting yourself up for failure. Perhaps your idea of flying over, marrying and filing CR1 might be better since it would at least get you over to meet her.

But I can also see from other posts you have a "us against the world and fight the system and nobody understands us" stance on everything instead of really listening and benefitting from others experience... So go ahead and "prove us all wrong" a lot of us have been her long enough to see the follow up threads "denied and crying, what do I do now"?

Sorry to sound negative, i really do wish everyone starting this long journey all the best, but it seem to me, that for a newbie who hasn't even filed yet, you sure come off like you got system pegged and figured out, wonder why hundreds of people here could not figure it out like you? Best of luck on your journey, I truly believe that everyone has the right to be with the one they love, and I think you're gonna need it. FIGHT ON BROTHER (but remember, uscis always wins!) OUT...

[F&Z 8]

Then you will have to learn from experience. Good luck. You'll need it.

Thank you for the kind words, I appreciate it. Best of luck to you also.

[F&Z 8]

Of course they are not pessimistic... If they were, you wouldn't pay them... I saw from your other postings that along with the "not able to afford a ticket to fulfill the basic requirement to qualify for k-1 visa" you seem to have a few other possible red flags such as major age difference, short online only courtship and a somewhat higher fraud consulate. Although no one of these factors (aside from not meeting in person waiver which you have a snowballs chance in hell of getting), will disqualify you... If you look at it from the uscis point of view (that is a stranger seeing only paperwork in from of them) you would see that you are setting yourself up for failure. Perhaps your idea of flying over, marrying and filing CR1 might be better since it would at least get you over to meet her.

But I can also see from other posts you have a "us against the world and fight the system and nobody understands us" stance on everything instead of really listening and benefitting from others experience... So go ahead and "prove us all wrong" a lot of us have been her long enough to see the follow up threads "denied and crying, what do I do now"?

Sorry to sound negative, i really do wish everyone starting this long journey all the best, but it seem to me, that for a newbie who hasn't even filed yet, you sure come off like you got system pegged and figured out, wonder why hundreds of people here could not figure it out like you? Best of luck on your journey, I truly believe that everyone has the right to be with the one they love, and I think you're gonna need it. FIGHT ON BROTHER (but remember, uscis always wins!) OUT...

I'm sorry I come across as having an "attitude" I guess I don't know how you would get that impression. I've tried to be respectful to everyone here, and I am learning just like all the other "newbies." I don't understand why you think I have an attitude that it's me gainst the world, I didn't say that.

I was reading your timeline and I want to congratulate you on going through the process so quickly. Just like you did at one time, I hope to learn everything I can to make our separation as short as possible. If I have made mistakes that irritate you, I apologize. But I think you are portraying me unfairly.

[KayDeeCee 4,893]

The lawyer I talked to today charges $750 for K1, start to finish, and does not seem near as pessimistic about a waiver as I am reading in this thread.

They want your money. They do not care if you are approved. You will be out one filing fee of $340 and another $750 you could have put towards meeting in person to actually fulfill the I-129F requirements. Please come back to update us about how it does or does not work out for you.

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

Not only will you be out of $340 and $750 but you will be out of 6-8 months time trying to circumvent the system, then having to start over. That is like flushing $1090 and many months waiting time down the toilet. We are trying to help you from wasting money and time.

If you are still sceptical about the answers here do a VJ search and see that the answers from many years of collective membership experience will lead to the same conclusion. It will not work, you will waste time and money.

[F&Z 8]

I wish all of us the best of luck and happiness in our visa journey. I don't wish anyone ill, even if they don't reciprocate.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

No decent lawyer is only going to charge 750, someone passing off typing to a helper will. You will be stuck in review forever with little change to getting an approval from USCIS let along thinking of getting approved at the embassy. You have barely started talking to this person, want to leap right over the requirement that you meet before filing , and you are near retirement looking to bring over a young person barely out of school through a known fraud consulate. You should slow down and think this out. The rules are there for a reason and there is so little chance of getting a visa on the path you are on. I can find flight from here to there for about 1500 which is close to the lawyer/filing fees and I wasn't even trying.

[F&Z 8]

No decent lawyer is only going to charge 750, someone passing off typing to a helper will. You will be stuck in review forever with little change to getting an approval from USCIS let along thinking of getting approved at the embassy. You have barely started talking to this person, want to leap right over the requirement that you meet before filing , and you are near retirement looking to bring over a young person barely out of school through a known fraud consulate. You should slow down and think this out. The rules are there for a reason and there is so little chance of getting a visa on the path you are on. I can find flight from here to there for about 1500 which is close to the lawyer/filing fees and I wasn't even trying.

You sure seem to think you know a lot about my life. I'm not anywhere near retirement, I couldn't even if I wanted to. And for your information, you're correct, she is barely out of school. She is a doctor.

You might be right about the lawyer, I have not even discussed the case with him yet, I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon. Is it such a crime to just discuss my options around here?

[christeen 966]

First off, nobody here wishes you ill will... And i never said you were not supportive of others, just thick headed. We are all here for the same reason, to get information and share experiences with the immigration process. I think you are confusing the doses of reality and tough love with ill will. Farthest from it. Just trying to give you the honest to goodness odds for what your are trying to do. And right now, you are heading up Mt. Everest in flip flops and many of us have seen enough past cases to know that just ain't gonna work!

Now, no one here stands to make ANY money off telling you what you want to hear, so you can take our advice or that of a lawyer who want you to PAY them to tell you what you want with no guarantee of it working... Your choice on who you trust...

But I have seen thousands of success stories including myself by following the recommendations of other VJ members. So bottom line... The denial rate of waivers of meeting within 2 years for K1 is 99.9% I don't care what some lawyer snake is telling you. Argue all you like, file waivers whatever, but facts are facts. If telling you this is meaning ill will, so be it. But truly it is not in my heart to discourage you on your journey, just give you the reality of the situation in the hopes,that you are successful. IMO, if you spend t half as much energy in trying to figure out how to make the time/money to fly and meet your fiancé and do it right as as you seem to in order justify why you cannot and fight to find a way circumvent or waiver your way around the system, I think you would be well on your way to a visit!

But bottom line, we all wish you the best and hope regardless how you choose to make it happen, that you get your happily ever after.

[F&Z 8]

But bottom line, we all wish you the best and hope regardless how you choose to make it happen, that you get your happily ever after.

I guess I would be more inclined to believe the "we" wishing me well if I weren't being compared to a pedophile.

I haven't made any decisions yet, I am just talking to the lawyer to see what they say. But I don't have the money for a visit and won't have it for a long time, and that may be too late. So sorry if I am trying to find the best way.

[Darnell 8,478]

Well, I have never "met" my fiancee in person, but I feel like we have "met" enough through our words and pictures to know that we are both in love and want to be with each other for the rest of our lives.

Great ! Make the trip , then file the petition.

Don't do that, to make the trip? USCIS is gonna laugh at you, send the I-129F back to ya, denied (but will take your money)

No, we won't laugh at you, as you'll already know some shame from not following the directions.