I opened my eyes!!!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

OnMyWayID: I know this COULD have been the case of someone uprooting, but it wasn't. And even if it was, how is it my fault that he turned out to be a dog? Am I to stay with him no matter what the circumstances just because he may have uprooted? He should have thought this thru before uprooting too, don't you think? He should have behave like a gentleman and honorable not like a hound dog.

Nah, besides he's Cuban so once his feet touch US soil he is in for good. He will just claim asylum and stay anyway. Probably what he wanted

[Iyawo Ijebu 157]

What?? No that's not what its about at all..... She got very lucky.. OP: This easily could have been a case of uprooting someone who changed their life to come be with you in a new country only to have you say "sorry, I made a mistake.. I led you and myself on for 8+months.. I'm bailing so it sucks to be you" ..... you did wait three whole days.. You could have ended up ruining someones life, instead you got lucky because your choice turned out to be dog who deserved it so it saved you having guilt.

Thank you.

[Iyawo Ijebu 157]

Of all the posts that I've read on VeeJay, this one made me understand why the process is tedious and procedural.

Hopefully the Dude will be able to bounce back and recover.

[Olomi_811 130]

SNOITALUTARGNOC!!!!

[duriantaste 44]

hmmm..strange story..very strange..3 days after he came? So so so strange...how could you tell you don't want to be with some one in only 3 days? Are you sure about all this or there is something else to do this? Why you waited for him to cross to USA? just a$king.

Edited May 15, 2012 by duriantaste

[RobbyUSA 26]

Congratulations!

good one!

the question is... how much money did this guy take you for?

(form fees, etc...)

[C-ma'am 684]

Don't jump into conclusions so quickly... it takes two to tango.

Edited May 15, 2012 by Celeste & C

[vinnylc 2]

What?? No that's not what its about at all..... She got very lucky.. OP: This easily could have been a case of uprooting someone who changed their life to come be with you in a new country only to have you say "sorry, I made a mistake.. I led you and myself on for 8+months.. I'm bailing so it sucks to be you" ..... you did wait three whole days.. You could have ended up ruining someones life, instead you got lucky because your choice turned out to be dog who deserved it so it saved you having guilt.

couldnt have said it better myself...100% right.....the only reason she isn't being looked down at is because of shear luck that he was a dog...

[vinnylc 2]

hmmm..strange story..very strange..3 days after he came? So so so strange...how could you tell you don't want to be with some one in only 3 days? Are you sure about all this or there is something else to do this? Why you waited for him to cross to USA? just a$king.

ya thats true....either something else was going on that we don't know about.....or there was never really love there in the first place....sad to say but more people in these situations think they are in love but really aren't...they seem to be in love with the "idea" of this person rather than the actual person...which is why so many people that do this type of marriages get hurt and split up and give the genuine ones a bad name...cough cough "Russian mail order bride"...its easy to fall in love with the idea of someone and what they may or may not represent....its a lot harder to love them unconditionally for who they are and stick with it...but this is just my opinion...

[KayDeeCee 4,893]

That's exactly what the Fiance Visa is about: You're given 90 days to supposedly get to know each other and if it doesn't work then move on. Glad you were able to react on time. Don't feel bad. Perfectly normal

Actually the K-1 visa is not meant to be a 'get to know you' visa. You are already supposed to be in a solid relationship and know each other. You are supposed to be engaged and ready to get married, which is why you sign letters of intent to marry within 90 days of entering the US. The 90 days is given so you have a little time to get situated, plan together and get married.

[Ban Hammer 13,283]

one post making a personal attack removed

That's exactly what the Fiance Visa is about: You're given 90 days to supposedly get to know each other and if it doesn't work then move on.

this is not true.

[joevegas 67]

What?? No that's not what its about at all..... She got very lucky.. OP: This easily could have been a case of uprooting someone who changed their life to come be with you in a new country only to have you say "sorry, I made a mistake.. I led you and myself on for 8+months.. I'm bailing so it sucks to be you" ..... you did wait three whole days.. You could have ended up ruining someones life, instead you got lucky because your choice turned out to be dog who deserved it so it saved you having guilt.

Great answer..Exactly how I feel,I quit my great paying job of 25 years,,Gut my pension short, gave almost everything I have away,If after 3 days my wive told me that this was not a good idea,I don't know what i would of done?..I had absolutely nothing left back in Canada...When I first got here I had doubts in the beginning to,as I'm sure did my wive,marriage is all about learning...I now could not imagine not having her in my life..I don't see how you deserve a thumbs up for that??..At least not after less then a week?...sure not all marriages are gonna work,but give it some time.

[Caryh 5,206]

This is exactly why people are supposed to really know each other and be truly committed to each other. I see the failure as a two direction failure. There are some who will do anything to get to America including trying to think they're in love, while there are many Americans that seem to fall in love with the idea of being in love. No one on either side should enter into this process unless they really know the other person and are truly committed. People are not shoes you try on for a while, particularly when you have them giving up their lives in their home country to be with you. Also Americans are not a meal ticket and free pass to a better life. In both cases they are human beings, not tools to get something you want. These type of situations are exactly why they make it hard to get through this process. I just don't understand why people go into it so lightly. I guess I should be glad he was a dog, and she can dump him guilty free. But now we have another dog running around in America, who probably didn't deserve to get here. Another dark stain on the process, and another reason while some will try to make it even harder on the people with real intentions of making a working marriage. To those that seem to think the 90 days is a trial period, what did that letter mean you both wrote and signed saying you intended to marry? Do you often sign things you don't believe are true?

[Cathi 5,744]

That's exactly what the Fiance Visa is about: You're given 90 days to supposedly get to know each other and if it doesn't work then move on. Glad you were able to react on time. Don't feel bad. Perfectly normal

This is not what the fiance visa is about, you are required to get married within 90 days if the beneficiary's entrance into the US. Not 90 days to get to know each other, that is why letters of intent by both parties are sent with the application. I don't agree with others who are"happy" for this couple that they found out they weren't made for each other before it was too late. This process is very long and tedious. We are made to jump through hoops to get our SO to this country, as well should be the case. BUT one of the reasons it is so difficult for the rest of us is because of cases like this. My husband and I love each other and we will do whatever it takes to get him here. And if others would stop playing the system perhaps it wouldn't be so difficult for those of us who are truly committed to each other.

[Cathi 5,744]

This is exactly why people are supposed to really know each other and be truly committed to each other. I see the failure as a two direction failure. There are some who will do anything to get to America including trying to think they're in love, while there are many Americans that seem to fall in love with the idea of being in love. No one on either side should enter into this process unless they really know the other person and are truly committed. People are not shoes you try on for a while, particularly when you have them giving up their lives in their home country to be with you. Also Americans are not a meal ticket and free pass to a better life. In both cases they are human beings, not tools to get something you want. These type of situations are exactly why they make it hard to get through this process. I just don't understand why people go into it so lightly. I guess I should be glad he was a dog, and she can dump him guilty free. But now we have another dog running around in America, who probably didn't deserve to get here. Another dark stain on the process, and another reason while some will try to make it even harder on the people with real intentions of making a working marriage. To those that seem to think the 90 days is a trial period, what did that letter mean you both wrote and signed saying you intended to marry? Do you often sign things you don't believe are true?

I totally agree. Cases like this are exactly the reason why it is so difficult for the rest of us.