any advice for a newbie

[msheesha 548]

Getting married in Morocco is no easy task. It involves lots of paperwork, waiting, and going to and from the consulate, courts, government offices, etc, etc, etc. It is no way to spend on a first trip getting to meet someone. It's not pleasant.

Also, getting married on the first trip after you've known each other a short time will be a HUGE red flag for the Casa consulate, which has not been approving many people lately.

How long will you be able to stay while you're in Morocco? It can take up to 3-4 weeks for all paperwork for marriage to be processed.

[tany1157 161]

Oh I just read what you wrote on your page that y'all met online in January? So met 3 months ago and ready to marry on first trip?

January?! Slow down girl. How are you supposed to see if you guys have any kind of bond while running around, doing paperwork?? because that is all you will be doing for a few weeks. Hardly an ideal way to see if you even want to marry this guy. You really should not get married now, you should take that time to spend together. Seriously

[tany1157 161]

If you really love him....wait. Marrying someone from a foreign country is not the same as marrying someone stateside. You both are still in the infatuation period. Seriously, my husband and I moved fast, but not that fast.

[msheesha 548]

Do you know anything about the high rate of unemployment and poverty in Morocco, and immigration fraud?

Not saying your SO is fraudulent, just wanting to make sure you have information so you can know what to look for.

Here's what the DOS warns about:

Internet Romance and Marriage Fraud: Many U.S. citizens befriend Moroccans through Internet dating and social networking sites and these relationships often to lead marriage or engagement. While many of the marriages between U.S. citizens and Moroccans are successful, the U.S. Consulate General in Casablanca warns against marriage fraud. It is not uncommon for foreign nationals to enter into marriages with U.S. citizens solely for immigration purposes. Relationships developed via correspondence, particularly those begun on the Internet, are especially susceptible to manipulation. Often, the marriages end in divorce in the United States when the foreign national acquires legal permanent residence (“green card”) or U.S. citizenship. In some cases, the new U.S. citizen or permanent resident then remarries a wife he divorced before, around the same time as entering into a relationship with a sponsoring U.S. citizen.

Some of the signs that an Internet contact may be developing a relationship with a U.S. citizen in order to obtain an immigrant visa through marriage are:

•Declarations of love within days or weeks of the initial contact;

•Proposals or discussions of marriage soon after initial contact;

•Requests to the U.S. citizen to visit the foreign national’s home country soon after the declaration of love or proposal;

•Responses to messages from the U.S. citizen friend are along the lines “I love you/Sorry I missed your call,” or similarly one-sided conversations;

•Once engaged, married, or an immigrant visa petition is filed, the Moroccan spouse/boy or girlfriend suddenly starts missing scheduled appointments to chat or call.

While chat rooms, dating and social networking sites are great ways to make friends across international borders, the U.S. government urges U.S. citizens who meet foreign nationals on the Internet to keep in mind the signs noted above. Entering into a marriage contract for the principal purpose of facilitating immigration to the United States for an alien is against U.S. law and can result in serious penalties, including fines and imprisonment for the U.S. citizen and the foreign national involved.

[adelitarif 0]

oh maaaaaaaan....i just wanna be with him...

i've seen ppl getting married here for less..i mean i know its not making any sens..but i love him...is there any way we can get through this...maybe we will not get married and then when i come back ..just file a fiancee visa??hows that sound??

[adelitarif 0]

Do you know anything about the high rate of unemployment and poverty in Morocco, and immigration fraud?

Not saying your SO is fraudulent, just wanting to make sure you have information so you can know what to look for.

Here's what the DOS warns about:

Internet Romance and Marriage Fraud: Many U.S. citizens befriend Moroccans through Internet dating and social networking sites and these relationships often to lead marriage or engagement. While many of the marriages between U.S. citizens and Moroccans are successful, the U.S. Consulate General in Casablanca warns against marriage fraud. It is not uncommon for foreign nationals to enter into marriages with U.S. citizens solely for immigration purposes. Relationships developed via correspondence, particularly those begun on the Internet, are especially susceptible to manipulation. Often, the marriages end in divorce in the United States when the foreign national acquires legal permanent residence (“green card”) or U.S. citizenship. In some cases, the new U.S. citizen or permanent resident then remarries a wife he divorced before, around the same time as entering into a relationship with a sponsoring U.S. citizen.

Some of the signs that an Internet contact may be developing a relationship with a U.S. citizen in order to obtain an immigrant visa through marriage are:

•Declarations of love within days or weeks of the initial contact;

•Proposals or discussions of marriage soon after initial contact;

•Requests to the U.S. citizen to visit the foreign national’s home country soon after the declaration of love or proposal;

•Responses to messages from the U.S. citizen friend are along the lines “I love you/Sorry I missed your call,” or similarly one-sided conversations;

•Once engaged, married, or an immigrant visa petition is filed, the Moroccan spouse/boy or girlfriend suddenly starts missing scheduled appointments to chat or call.

While chat rooms, dating and social networking sites are great ways to make friends across international borders, the U.S. government urges U.S. citizens who meet foreign nationals on the Internet to keep in mind the signs noted above. Entering into a marriage contract for the principal purpose of facilitating immigration to the United States for an alien is against U.S. law and can result in serious penalties, including fines and imprisonment for the U.S. citizen and the foreign national involved.

oh thats scary

but what can we do???

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

My only advice is to slow down, take time to get to know him & his family & do NOT rush into marriage. If its going to work out for you & he then its best to not rush this. You are the age of my baby brother & I'd advise him of the same thing I told you if he were in your situation.

[tany1157 161]

oh maaaaaaaan....i just wanna be with him...

i've seen ppl getting married here for less..i mean i know its not making any sens..but i love him...is there any way we can get through this...maybe we will not get married and then when i come back ..just file a fiancee visa??hows that sound??

This is a much better plan than marriage, although even then, it won't guarantee an approval. Who has gotten married faster than 4 months after meeting???

Edited April 23, 2012 by tany1157

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

So it is true that y'all met 3 months ago???

[mounir412 101]

slow down is better than a denial

[adelitarif 0]

ok thank u guys

[msheesha 548]

oh thats scary

but what can we do???

What you can do is

1 - continue to get to know your new friend, find out about his life - does he have work prospects, does he look for work, does he work? How does he spend his time?

2- Get to know more about his family.

3- Enjoy your life, and do things to improve the quality and happiness of your life - you sound very lonely, and sound as though you feel like meeting him will be great for your life. Relationships work best when both people are happy going into the relationship.

4 - Read the DOS warning, and ask yourself if anything in your relationship sounds like that.

5 - Ask him if any of his friends are in relationships with American or European women.

6 - Ask him what he thinks life is like in America.

7 - Ask him how many other women he's met online, and how long the relationships with them lasted, and why they ended.

Those are a few things I can think of off the top of my head.

Anyone else?

[~PalmTreeGurl~ 154]

I hope you understand that each of us that posted are being completely honest with you. I hope what we say doesn't make you upset & go back to telling him your upset bcz people from the Internet just don't understand yalls love for each other ... Ect... Bcz all of us do. Most all of us been with our Egyptian or Moroccan spouses for years and are much further into the process & even many of us have our spouses here now but years later. We are just saying go slow, get to know this man & his family. I hope you do take the time needed to do that & that things work out for you & he.

Edited April 23, 2012 by ~PalmTreeGurl~

[tany1157 161]

What you can do is

1 - continue to get to know your new friend, find out about his life - does he have work prospects, does he look for work, does he work? How does he spend his time?

2- Get to know more about his family.

3- Enjoy your life, and do things to improve the quality and happiness of your life - you sound very lonely, and sound as though you feel like meeting him will be great for your life. Relationships work best when both people are happy going into the relationship.

4 - Read the DOS warning, and ask yourself if anything in your relationship sounds like that.

5 - Ask him if any of his friends are in relationships with American or European women.

6 - Ask him what he thinks life is like in America.

7 - Ask him how many other women he's met online, and how long the relationships with them lasted, and why they ended.

Those are a few things I can think of off the top of my head.

Anyone else?

I can't stress how important this one is for ANY relationship. This is why I said your man should enhance your life, not be all,and end all to your life. You have to know who you are, what you want, and be happy. If you look to a relationship to help you feel better about yourself, or your loneliness, than nevermind all the immigration stuff, that in itself spells disaster. You said you have a child? I hope that child is thought of before any of your own feelings, as you are proposing to bring a man in your house that you have only known for a few short months. My husband knew from day one, that A) my son comes before anyone and B) that I have a good relationship with my son's dad, and it will stay that way. I was pretty satisfied with my life when I met my husband. I work in a career that I love, and am very involved with my son, volunteering in his school and such. I have a failed marriage, and it failed in part because I got married young, and because I thought I needed someone in my life to be happy. I was so wrong. I needed to be content with myself before I could really be in a successful relationship. Relationships are difficult, and need more than just love to succeed. Add cultural/religious differences into the mix, and you have yourself quite a challenge. I fell in love with my husband early, but we thank God for what we just went through, as we know each other so much more than we did the first year together. There is a lot of compromise on both parts, and hard work to make it work. If it is real love, it will withstand the time apart.

Edited April 23, 2012 by tany1157

[NY_BX 397]

ok thank u guys

Please please please read and internalize everything everyone's said so far. This is a disaster waiting to happen, I hate to say. This is not about how people behave here in the US. This is about how people behave in their native countries in contrast with how they behave with a USC. That's why there's so much fraud. So yes, some people here marry in a matter of days after meeting, but more than likely none of them have to go through the painful, legal process of immigration.

This is expensive, lengthy and tiring. So I will go ahead and say DO NOT marry while you're there. Do not sign any documents you don't understand and certainly do not commit to anything you do not agree with. Plus, someone already said the process is not as easy as you think.

When you meet him on your trip, evaluate everything. If you're still convinced he's the one, file a fiance visa and marry in the US.