Biggest surprises

[Chris & Anna 1]

What were some of the best and worst surprises your RUB had when s/he got to the US?

Any tips on helping them cope with the bad ones?

[1HappyGuy 45]

You're talking about transitions, not really surprises. Some of the good and bad has more to do with women in general. Shopping for clothes is for them great since they think all the clothes are so cheap here. Most of the bad stuff has to do with not seeing items that they are familiar with. If you can, find some stores that carry Russian goods. It helps to alleviate the homesickness and to relax in their new environment.

There are of course a number of cultural differences that both of you will need to adjust to. Do you normally have pots with cooked food in your refrigerator, probably not, but expect it? Drinks will be requested without ice. Get ready for some old superstitions in your daily life. Don't whistle in the house and stuff like that.

The big thing is to be willing to accept and adjust from both of you.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

BAD

The fact that we actually use the English measure system. She thought we had stopped doing that. I bought a celcius oven knob in Montreal and put little labels on the thermostat

No public transport where we lived at the time. She learned to drive and we moved to a more civilized place

The fact that you are NOT rich if you make $6000 per month. I told her that she did not believe it.

Our banking system and credit cards. She has mastered the use of both now

so now they are in the "good" category

GOOD

Clothes dryer Reliable electricity, heat and hot water. ALWAYS hot water for her night time bath

Having a car, she loves it! She loves her car!

Cheap clothes and shoes ("almost free")

She was really, really impressed with our medical facilites here, she had a kidney stone just a few weeks after arriving and was really pleased with the emergency room, etc. When the statement came she nearly flipped out and died. $2600 for a 3 hour emergency room visit! Of course I pointed out to her that it says "This is not a bill" and indicated what was billed to insurance. what did we pay? -0-

I am sure there will be more lists and I am sure my wife reacted the same as everyone elses. she arrived with the typical "Everything is better in Ukraine" atitude and could not wait to go back for a long visit...2 months the first time back. Next time one month and was whining to come back after 3 weeks. Next time 3 weeks and griped the whole time she missed her car, hated the bus, the flat was SOOOOOOOO hot, damn hot water went out, electricity went out, couldn't get the internet on in time before we left so had to go to an internet club, only two kinds of apples at the market yada, yada. This year, "I suppose we have to go and visit mom, we need to move her here" and our plans to retire and live in our flat in Ukraine have become "maybe we will keep it for a while and use it when we visit, maybe we should sell it"

when she arrived it was "Do I HAVE TO become a US citizen, I really don't want to" No, Alla you never have to become a citizen if you do not want to. By last fall "How soon can we send the citizenship application?"

For certain there WILL be difficulties, confusion, frustration. Be VERY patient and help her to learn about or way of life. You have an opportunity to be her "GOLD"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

There are of course a number of cultural differences that both of you will need to adjust to. Do you normally have pots with cooked food in your refrigerator, probably not, but expect it? Drinks will be requested without ice. Get ready for some old superstitions in your daily life. Don't whistle in the house and stuff like that.

The big thing is to be willing to accept and adjust from both of you.

YEAH!!! She has it easy, WE are the ones that had to adjust! And NO SHOES in the house!

[Brusik 11]

Bad...Her luggage was still in Germany after she arrived in Seattle

Good... She got new undies from Victorias Sercret !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good... Airline paid her $200.00 for necessities

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I suggest you read the thread here named "RUBbette women and housework" which is a current topic. And a good one.

[mox 298]

I can't really say we had any bad surprises. And the good surprises? Well, a gentleman never tells.

[TBoneTX 44,672]

I suggest you read the thread here named "RUBbette women and housework" which is a current topic. And a good one.

You da dude, G-Bone.

[jimnlena 8]

I would think she was most surprised by yard sales, she calls them the Ukrainian Klondike. People selling almost new stuff for free really.

Bad nothing really

Edited March 10, 2012 by jimnlena

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I would think she was most surprised by yard sales, she calls them the Ukrainian Klondike. People selling almost new stuff for free really.

Bad nothing really

Yes, Alla was surprised at this also. "Why do Americans have so much stuff and sell it so cheap?" A like new pair of "Rollers" (roller blades) for $3. Shortly after she arrived my gas weedwhacker gave up the ghost and I took her when I cruised around some garage sales and picked up one for $5 That hooked her on garage sales. Now on Saturdays she goes "sale-ing"

With the Rollers she even questioned the person "What is wrong with these? For $3 there must be something wrong with them" No, just don't use them. "But they cost a lot of money, why did you buy them if you don't use them?" Alla, pay the lady!

[jimnlena 8]

Yes, Alla was surprised at this also. "Why do Americans have so much stuff and sell it so cheap?" A like new pair of "Rollers" (roller blades) for $3. Shortly after she arrived my gas weedwhacker gave up the ghost and I took her when I cruised around some garage sales and picked up one for $5 That hooked her on garage sales. Now on Saturdays she goes "sale-ing"

With the Rollers she even questioned the person "What is wrong with these? For $3 there must be something wrong with them" No, just don't use them. "But they cost a lot of money, why did you buy them if you don't use them?" Alla, pay the lady!

Yep it is a Saturday mandatory here now also!!

[james&olya 1,121]

I have to echo something Gary noted, the medical care! We unfortunately wound up in our local ER 36 hours after their arrival. Olya was flabbergasted at how nice and caring the doctors and nurses were! She is certain our daughter would have died if it had been back home in Russia. Since then we have had several more involvements with health care providers in the US and each time she is amazed. She had been adamant before that she did NOT like doctors (some undisclosed irony there! ) or nurses but now is thinking maybe she wants to get her RN degree here.

Since discovering how to get russian TV over the internet and how easy it is to find anything you want to buy on the internet she has no complaints about life here. She talks with her family back home on skype several times a week and they want to get together but it is not about Olya going back there, it is always when they can come back here! Her mother has been here twice already and her brother and his wife once.

A couple other things. Olya was surprised and thrilled at all the wildlife we see all around us here. Having squirrels, chipmunks, and rabbits in our yard and eating food we put out for them on our porches has been a real treat for her. She was practically shrieking in delight when I took her a few miles from here where the deer 'yard up' due to our deep snow. She was amazed to see hundreds of wild deer so close and to be able to almost hand feed them! We have not yet encountered any bears but it is inevitable. And she still can't get over how cheap the clothes are. Her family returns with much more than they come here with. They especially like the second-hand shops, her brother and his wife spent hours there! Olya has not yet discovered garage sales but when spring arrives here that will probably happen.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I have to echo something Gary noted, the medical care! We unfortunately wound up in our local ER 36 hours after their arrival. Olya was flabbergasted at how nice and caring the doctors and nurses were! She is certain our daughter would have died if it had been back home in Russia. Since then we have had several more involvements with health care providers in the US and each time she is amazed. She had been adamant before that she did NOT like doctors (some undisclosed irony there! ) or nurses but now is thinking maybe she wants to get her RN degree here.

Since discovering how to get russian TV over the internet and how easy it is to find anything you want to buy on the internet she has no complaints about life here. She talks with her family back home on skype several times a week and they want to get together but it is not about Olya going back there, it is always when they can come back here! Her mother has been here twice already and her brother and his wife once.

A couple other things. Olya was surprised and thrilled at all the wildlife we see all around us here. Having squirrels, chipmunks, and rabbits in our yard and eating food we put out for them on our porches has been a real treat for her. She was practically shrieking in delight when I took her a few miles from here where the deer 'yard up' due to our deep snow. She was amazed to see hundreds of wild deer so close and to be able to almost hand feed them! We have not yet encountered any bears but it is inevitable. And she still can't get over how cheap the clothes are. Her family returns with much more than they come here with. They especially like the second-hand shops, her brother and his wife spent hours there! Olya has not yet discovered garage sales but when spring arrives here that will probably happen.

How soon we forget James! We lived in a very rural area when Alla arrived. She started driving right away and about day 3 or so there were 2 deer standing in the road. "What is it?" Deer. "Whose animals are these?" They are wild deer Alla, they do not belong to anyone. "Why are they in the road?" They go where they want, they are wild. "This is crazy! They should not allow the deer in the road" It was a couple months before she saw a moose. She was driving us to town one day and as we crossed a bridge between the islands where we lived she became all flustered and pulled over right after the bridge. She said someones dog was swimming in the lake and we "had to help the dog" She ran back and looked over the bridge at the animal swimming in the lake. Hmmmm...kind of strange looking dog..."oh Alla that is not a ..." Too late, I saw only the bottoms of her feet as she fled back to the car, jumped in and locked all the doors leaving me locked out! It was a small black bear. Fortunately the bear did not come and eat me before I got her to unlock the doors.

Since then she has made me sleep between her and the bedroom window. In case a bear comes into town, climbs into our 2nd floor bedroom window, she will feed me to the bear as she makes good her escape! Bears climbing in windows and eating people is pretty rare.

Alla always puts out food for the squirrels and birds on our deck which is right outside the room which is her "office" and has been very happy with having a yard and growing flowers. She is very proud of her flowers and will tell people looking for our house "Turn by Pricechopper, it is on the left, the house with all the flowers"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Yep it is a Saturday mandatory here now also!!

She bought an incredible set of kitchen knives at a garage sale/moving sale for something like $20, I do not remember exactly but very cheap. Seriously these are knives that are $300+ retail. Usually sold in specialty kitchen stores. She has discovered the right neighborhoods to shop in. Last summer she took all of them to Ukraine to a guy that sharpens knives (some things are still better in Ukraine) and the guy looked at her knives and said "You did not buy these in Ukraine, where did you get these, they are very good quality" She told the guy "in America...for $20"

He DOES do a good job of sharpening them.

BAD surprise? The arts of fixing shoes, handbags, sharpening knives, repairing zippers, etc. has died in the US. Throw it away and buy new. This is an unusual thing for Ukrainians/Russians

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Good...Food, incredible variety and normal price, especially fruits and vegetables

Bad...hard to find some Ukrainian favorites but there is a "Russian store" for that.

Good...cheap clothes, shoes, electronics, appliances

Bad...expensive haircuts, manicures, theatre tickets

Good...shooting! She loves shooting. Anyone can buy guns and bullets.

Good...skiing and skating

Good...swimming in the lake, bad...only 2-3 months per year.