Older American WOmen

[seaguliable 6]

"silly little boys that use fake boarding passes in the US" what about silly little girls ?? and guy ..really you think 50 year old woman are stupid??" Senior women age 50 and older control net worth of $19 trillion and own more than three-fourths of the nation’s financial wealth." – readjust those rose colored glasses ,I am sure there are just as many men who get scammed

[seaguliable 6]

"silly little boys that use fake boarding passes in the US" what about silly little girls ?? and guy ..really you think 50 year old woman are stupid??" Senior women age 50 and older control net worth of $19 trillion and own more than three-fourths of the nation's financial wealth." – readjust those rose colored glasses ,I am sure there are just as many men who get scammed

[seaguliable 6]

and guy i traveled all the way to africa met a good friend of over a year who i then fell in love with and ended up marrying him ..and not once were we in a cafe its a sterotype of the non american african male

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

Actually you are wrong, about twice as many woman get scammed and they tend to lose a lot more then men. And how much of the wealth is inherited and how much is earned. Not sure where you are getting your numbers from only 6 other the top 50 wealthiest in the world are woman and they aren't the top ones. In the US it drops to 5 of the top 50. Beware of creative accounting by the bra burners of the 60's

[seaguliable 6]

Actually you are wrong, about twice as many woman get scammed and they tend to lose a lot more then men. And how much of the wealth is inherited and how much is earned. Not sure where you are getting your numbers from only 6 other the top 50 wealthiest in the world are woman and they aren't the top ones. In the US it drops to 5 of the top 50. Beware of creative accounting by the bra burners of the 60's

[seaguliable 6]

lol guy ..i am not sure where your numbers come from mine come from marketing profile who is buying and putting money into the economy ,which equals work force ...you know job? And as for scamming some how i dont think african males got the cornerstone on that one

there plenty of males in usa who do that really well.I think i should have had my case looked at for if all componets are in place that are required and no matter what you say or think i am firm on belief that age should not be a factor as you so dearly want to make it so.And i know that is not what is gonna show up as why they rejected ,so i am curious to see reason they put .But i tell you right now bra burning or not the same amt of taxes come out of my paycheck as yours so why is my age a factor and not a guys

[amyandjorge 76]

Can't say I disagree with the claims of blatant discrimination. (I spoke to an attorney who said my case will be viewed as a naive young white girl getting swept of her feet by a latin lover *ugh please*)

But I see this more as an insult to your husband than to the female half. Maybe he was perceived as a man who would prefer a traditional lifestyle, or just wanted a ticket to America. Seems like he was judged incorrectly, either way. If you were not present, he should be assuming most of the responsibility for the result of the interview. And you made a good point, maybe they were testing his reaction.

As far as I can tell, when going through the process of marrying a foreigner (and bringing them to the US), you have to explain and defend every detail of your relationship that is not mainstream/most widely accepted in both countries. What is private and protected in most relationships in the US is scrutinized during the immigration process

[seaguliable 6]

Can't say I disagree with the claims of blatant discrimination. (I spoke to an attorney who said my case will be viewed as a naive young white girl getting swept of her feet by a latin lover *ugh please*)

But I see this more as an insult to your husband than to the female half. Maybe he was perceived as a man who would prefer a traditional lifestyle, or just wanted a ticket to America. Seems like he was judged incorrectly, either way. If you were not present, he should be assuming most of the responsibility for the result of the interview. And you made a good point, maybe they were testing his reaction.

As far as I can tell, when going through the process of marrying a foreigner (and bringing them to the US), you have to explain and defend every detail of your relationship that is not mainstream/most widely accepted in both countries. What is private and protected in most relationships in the US is scrutinized during the immigration process

i agree and thanks for understanding ,my frustration is how to defend my age when i figured in this day in the usa we are beyond that type mentation.

Edited December 23, 2011 by seawash

[Anh map 2,098]

its not outside my social norms of usa for a older woman to be with a younger guy ,hower its against the law to allow my age and sex as a factor in any decision from a person representing the USA and to state it at a interview is insulting to me regardless if i am present or not

i bet you that reason is not placed on any peice of paper sent to me. Like I say any other reason i could have dealt easily with ,but belittling my age puts women in usa back in the dark ages .

You were not being interviewed, your husband was. The interviewing officers are given wide latitude to determine the true intentions of all visa applicants. You and your spouse are going to be held to a very high standard due to the history of fraud from Nigeria and Ghana (the two countries that you've mentioned).

As others have stated, it was a bad interview.

The goal here is to obtain the visa for your spouse. At this stage reevaluate your submissions and the interview dispassionately and address the weakness(es). The cultural norms of the society where the beneficiary is living is what matters, not the norms in the US. We may not agree with that procedure, but that is how it goes in this realm.

[yachachiq12 43]

I'm sure everyone is very sorry for the hardship the interview outcome must be putting on you and your husband (sometimes they aren't good at outright expressing it in the forums, but everyone understands the difficulties of the process one way or another). However, you need to understand that the fact that your relationship is not the most normal sort culturally for Nigeria means that you must provide more evidence than a couple with no "red flags." The CO is not judging your choice of a partner, but they have the right and the responsibility to judge what they see as the likelihood that the marriage is indeed a bona fide one or not. One of the indicators of a marriage not being bona fide is an age gap such as yours (as judged by seeing this in other fraudulent cases, in the CO's mind), in which a younger man would not likely be able to have children, while culturally having children is seen as expected behavior for someone of his age. Their responsibility is to assume fraud for everyone, but particularly in a high fraud consulate and with a red flag waving before them, while your responsibility is to present a burden of proof. It's not "your age" you need to defend but rather your relationship on the whole. If you were unable to do so to their satisfaction, you must find a way to move forward from this that will allow you to live with your partner here or abroad. I think it would be wise to focus your energies on that rather than the perceived discrimination. Discrimination and being judged are an inherent part of this process.

I wish you luck!

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

Your quotes are from a site called she-comomy , hardly an unbiased site.

Many woman have married younger men in Nigeria and gotten approved. The bigger the differece the harder it is , because it is very important to the Nigerian culture that a man produces a son. More so for the oldest son , who inherits the wealth and the headaches of his father. The issue is to confront the problems. Nigeria also accounts for a huge portion of the DV lottery entries. To most of Nigeria coming to the US is the dream of their lives. They know the chances are small and there are a huge number that think nothing of a marriage to someone as old as their mother if it means getting that coveted green card. The embassy is trying to stop women from being used. If you didn't get it right this time around take a deep breath and do better next time. Having to file twice isn't that uncommon for Lagos

[Penguin_ie 5,992]

**** two more posts removed. Any more inappropriate posts and users will be banned from this thread. ****

[TeapotGirl 66]

Unfortunately that's their process. Just understand that you were just affected by a double standard and fraud in the past. Even after the petitioning process, you will still encounter prejudicial questioning from time to time (I am into May-December affair too but yours must be more difficult because you're the female) depending where you live. We can't please everybody, we don't have to, just have to get used to it. You've got nothing to hide, just give them what they want with all smiles , hang in there, keep your faith, it'll pass. In time, people will have no choice but get used to the two of you.

[Damian&Kelly 16]

I understand this is discrimination but this is something you and your husband should have been prepared for as this is what happens all the time. And many fraud marriages got approved and the US spouse never sees it coming, they always go into it in love. Everyone always says that will never happen to me but honestly it happens more times then we know, and I'm not saying your marriage is fraud, you obviously love him very much to get this upset, but your husbands response to those questions is what put you in this position. Proof is on paper and anyone can smile for a picture and put a happy front forward. It's your husbands answers and reaction to each question that will go above and beyond the paper proof. And now its all just his word against the embassies word. This is nothing against you the US citizen, this is against your husband who is going outside his culture for what they want to prove is love not just the US.

[evoria 19]

Damn is that legal to ask. That CO needs to be reprimanded. Email yor congressman.

Your quotes are from a site called she-comomy , hardly an unbiased site.

Many woman have married younger men in Nigeria and gotten approved. The bigger the differece the harder it is , because it is very important to the Nigerian culture that a man produces a son. More so for the oldest son , who inherits the wealth and the headaches of his father. The issue is to confront the problems. Nigeria also accounts for a huge portion of the DV lottery entries. To most of Nigeria coming to the US is the dream of their lives. They know the chances are small and there are a huge number that think nothing of a marriage to someone as old as their mother if it means getting that coveted green card. The embassy is trying to stop women from being used. If you didn't get it right this time around take a deep breath and do better next time. Having to file twice isn't that uncommon for Lagos