Priority dates p**s me off

[Nicole-N-Nattoy 24]

This is a place where we all should beable to say our thoughts and feelings. So I hope the OP doesn't take to much offense to some of the responses given. The post is open for debate. I personally do not think an expedite is in order because you are pregnant or have children. Even though women get pregnant sometimes even after taking precautions to not become pregnant. I appreciate this post because it gets me thinking about what should and shouldn't be allowed as far as expedites go. I know that people from Haiti are given expedites. I think that is far. Also pregnant women's emotions are also magnified at times:) I wouldn't like to go through this process pregnant, and anyone who does is probably very strong or will be made strong after all is said and done. After pondering it for awhile, i think immigration is fair enough when it comes to expedites.

[Adil & Jeanne 296]

My 130 went in april of 2010 and many bipassed us. i have waited 16 months now. I am upset with those who ask for expediate. we all have issues that need attention. None of us wnat to be without the one we love especially when the one we really care about is in a dangerous country or one where they can not get decent education or job. or have decent food or bathrooms. and yes, those of you who have children, it is hard but htis is the one issue you could have avoided with care. Other things are uncontrolable. I would have liked my case hurried also so I had help here caring for a family member who is disabled.

how is it fair that people can file priority dates on there I-130 an some dont have reason to, for those who are in hardship, ill or extreme circumstances this does not apply to you, me an my husband have 2 small kids 1 he missed the birth of because of this visa proces an we filed may 24th, we be lucky if he makes christmas or even easter, we couldnt get a priority date for ours, i think the system needs looked at, those with children should get it done lil faster its not right to make moms deal with kids by themselves for nearly a year an to split familys apart like this, sorry for the rant, miss my hubby so much an i no the boys need him hopes fading pretty fast

[Done--Really 331]

Well, I swore I wasn't going to get into this discussion, but it is taking a bad turn.

First of all there are rules and procedures every step along the way, and the fact that some people are able to take advantage of some of the exceptions is good, not bad. We may all be envious when we see it happen, but they didn't hurt us in any way, so I'd rather applaud that the system worked in their favor.

But we also have to remember that some people are very fragile and have no idea what they are getting into when they start down this path that we are all on. Yes they whine or strike out at others, and generally cause upset, but it is only because they are fragile. Most of us are strong--very strong--so we can take it, and if at the margin we can help, even better.

I don't like the whining one little bit, but it doesn't change my life, and if I can help even a little, then I will grit my teeth and see what I can do.

Best wishes Steph--if immigration pain is the worst thing you will suffer in your life, then you are truly blessed.

[Casprd 167]

People need to remember their own frustration and stress during the process. The OP is venting their frustration and I can totally understand. I understand how many people would think that a pending birth should be cause to expidite, but keep in mind that there is an incredible amount of visa fraud when it comes to fiancee and spouse visas. If everyone was allowed to expidite for pending births then those planning on committing fraud would be trying to get their SO pregnant (or get pregnant) so they could get to the US sooner. Military deployments I am 100% behind, and as someone else pointed out. Even when both spouses are USC's, they can be separated for long periods also.

Hang in there, the date will come and you will be together. We all know how much it sucks to be separated from our loved ones, but it will be over with eventually and then you can look to the future together.

[floridaboy99 0]

I understand your pain ,

I have kids myself and my son just came back from Germany there is to much BS involved in this immigration system here.

Totally flawed for legal immigrants I deal with that s.... for 12 years now ( and still not there yet )

to expensive and unfair for legals , others jumping fences and nobody does anything against it.

I am for legal immigration reform and send the rest back over the border !

[Sergi9 110]

how is it fair that people can file priority dates on there I-130 an some don't have reason to, for those who are in hardship, ill or extreme circumstances this does not apply to you, me an my husband have 2 small kids 1 he missed the birth of because of this visa process an we filed may 24th, we be lucky if he makes Christmas or even Easter, we couldn't get a priority date for ours, i think the system needs looked at, those with children should get it done lil faster its not right to make moms deal with kids by themselves for nearly a year an to split familys apart like this, sorry for the rant, miss my hubby so much an i no the boys need him hopes fading pretty fast

The priority date system doesn't apply here probably you mean expedite? They look at the totality of the circumstances and decide expedite based on that. We cannot know the circumstances of the decision and from reports here it seems to be all over the map in terms of severity of hardship.

As for "priority dates" in family immigration this is one of the most unfair areas of our immigration system. If I understand correctly LPR's and those with lower priority family members other than spouse really feel the brunt of the folks who are having children while they are on the list due to "derivative beneficiaries". One person gets on the list and then has 2-3-4 kids while they are waiting for the priority date to become current. When the priority date comes current then that person and the kids come and take up 4 VISA numbers instead of one, thus the unborn kids at time of getting on the list "jump the line" and take numbers bumping people in the back of the list back even further in the line. That is why it takes some categories 10-20 years for priority dates to become current.

So the point is perhaps you should be grateful your situation doesn't involve in the scheme of things a more lengthy wait.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Please remember that the OP started this discussion with a statement that she was venting. We have all been there and done that, maybe not all on Visa Journey, but somewhere and to someone in our lives. The immigration process is hard and it often appears unfair. Sometimes it very obviously is unfair. It is one thing to intellectually read that the process takes XXX number of days and months at each stage, but it is a totally different thing to experience the waiting emotionally. It can drive even the most rational of us around the bend sometimes. I sure know it did for me a number of times

The OP didn't ask for family planning advice, or life choice advice. She didn't come for political commentary about illegal or legal immigration. She came because she needed to vent. She is stressed, she is unhappy, she if frustrated. I think virtually all of us can appreciate those feelings.

So, instead of jumping on her for venting her frustrations here on this forum among people who honestly should understand and appreciate her situation, instead of trying to blame her or her choices or tell her she doesn't have a right to feel like this because others have waited longer, it is alright just to say 'Yeah, I hear you. It does suck. I hope we all get some good news soon".

This isn't a situation any of us can repair. All we can really do is empathize, support and share. If you are not able to do that, then maybe it would be a better idea just to move on to the next thread and not respond in this one.

Edited July 10, 2011 by Kathryn41

[Sergi9 110]

The OP didn't ask for family planning advice, or life choice advice. She didn't come for political commentary about illegal or legal immigration. She came because she needed to vent. She is stressed, she is unhappy, she if frustrated. I think virtually all of us can appreciate those feelings.

So, instead of jumping on her for venting her frustrations here on this forum among people who honestly should understand and appreciate her situation, instead of trying to blame or or her choices or tell her she doesn't have a right to feel like this because others have waited longer, it is alright just to say 'Yeah, I hear you. It does suck. I hope we all get some good news soon".

[Alke 2]

Please remember that the OP started this discussion with a statement that she was venting. We have all been there and done that, maybe not all on Visa Journey, but somewhere and to someone in our lives. The immigration process is hard and it often appears unfair. Sometimes it very obviously is unfair. It is one thing to intellectually read that the process takes XXX number of days and months at each stage, but it is a totally different thing to experience the waiting emotionally. It can drive even the most rational of us around the bend sometimes. I sure know it did for me a number of times

The OP didn't ask for family planning advice, or life choice advice. She didn't come for political commentary about illegal or legal immigration. She came because she needed to vent. She is stressed, she is unhappy, she if frustrated. I think virtually all of us can appreciate those feelings.

So, instead of jumping on her for venting her frustrations here on this forum among people who honestly should understand and appreciate her situation, instead of trying to blame or or her choices or tell her she doesn't have a right to feel like this because others have waited longer, it is alright just to say 'Yeah, I hear you. It does suck. I hope we all get some good news soon".

This isn't a situation any of us can repair. All we can really do is empathize, support and share. If you are not able to do that, then maybe it would be a better idea just to move on to the next thread and not respond in this one.

[Done--Really 331]

Hey Zoo--

You go, girl !!!

[Glyn and Kathy 288]

Just wanted to say to the OP, hang in there. Its tough to be separated from someone you love...we all know. And its especially hard on kids, but they are very resilient and cope a lot better than adults sometimes. You'll get through it. Ignore the posts from some of the others that are mean spirited or just right awful. Wishing you the best!!