Dreaded MIL visit..

[Krikit 1,163]

Could I really??

Absolutely! I will give you parenting tips.

[coraliesolms 47]

Oh my, what a heartbreaking story.. I thought mine was bad, she has never come right out and said I wasnt welcome!! (Maybe thats cus she needed a slave to wash the dishes after..hahhaha).

We should start the "evil MIL club". And yes, I hope to heaven that I NEVER end up doing to my childrens spouses what I have to endure!!

[Y&E 12]

I don't know what it is about some women. My ex-MIL was fantastic, even though my ex and I are no longer together I'll still visit his parents the next time I'm home. They treated me just like the daughter that they never had and she really was like my second Mum.

New MIL however is a totally different story. I spent 2 hours turning the volume up and up to drown out a shouting match in Russian between her, Hubby and FIL - I was later told, 'we are sorry for being so loud and talking in Russian, but it was a family matter.' Erm, hello, aren't I now family. If you want to do that don't do it in my house. However, I made it clear to both of them that they were being very rude to me and that they weren't welcome in my house unless they learnt to be polite. No wonder their own sons try to avoid spending any significant time with them!

Well done to everyone who now has fabulous MILs and sorry to anyone else who shares the wicked MIL.

[Marilyn. 340]

I feel bad for you guys who ended up with not so nice In-laws... my MIL was awesome.. she treated me like a daughter.. I really miss her..

My mom's MIL was not a very nice person.. for some reason she didn't really like my mom and was very mean to her .. I wasn't very close to her either...

[Fandango 1,439]

Thx guys! She was awful...If I was in my 30s as I am now, I woulda told her to GFH sharpish But it's all good, cos everything led me to where I am now, which is a super duper awesome place

[coraliesolms 47]

!

[Sprailenes 47]

I don't know what it is about some women. My ex-MIL was fantastic, even though my ex and I are no longer together I'll still visit his parents the next time I'm home. They treated me just like the daughter that they never had and she really was like my second Mum.

New MIL however is a totally different story. I spent 2 hours turning the volume up and up to drown out a shouting match in Russian between her, Hubby and FIL - I was later told, 'we are sorry for being so loud and talking in Russian, but it was a family matter.' Erm, hello, aren't I now family. If you want to do that don't do it in my house. However, I made it clear to both of them that they were being very rude to me and that they weren't welcome in my house unless they learnt to be polite. No wonder their own sons try to avoid spending any significant time with them!

Well done to everyone who now has fabulous MILs and sorry to anyone else who shares the wicked MIL.

My exes parents and I are still on good terms too. I send them updates, they call and ask how I am. They're the grandparents of my son but they have always been great.

My MIL is a bit of a snob... simply put. Nothing will ever be good enough for her and realizing that really helped me cope with everything.

[Tater&Bugger 3]

Ok... I just received AWEFUL news. My mother in law is flying in on Saturday.. and staying UNTIL NEW YEARS!!!

This is my first christmas with my family in the US, and this woman is VERY hard to deal with. She is very domineering and opinionated (she told me how to decorate our house when we moved in. When politics come up she tells me to shut up as I am an immigrant and do not know enough to talk about the USA.I dont want to lose my cool in the month that she is going to be here.. thankfully I work in a jewelry store and I will be worked to a frazzle by christmas eve, so hopefully we wont have too many run-ins.

Anybody have any tips on dealing with an over-bearing monster-in-law?

Sorry I have no advice... I got pretty lucky. I get along well with the in laws. We have different opinions but it's not necessarily in a bad way. I have no idea what I would do. I can be honest to a fault and never back down from standing up for what I believe in. If I were in your shoes there would be a pretty good chance MIL and me would become foes and cause problems forever haha. I am not good at biting me tongue when it's personal. Good luck and I hope you can make the best of it!

[Tater&Bugger 3]

Sorry I have no advice... I got pretty lucky. I get along well with the in laws. We have different opinions but it's not necessarily in a bad way. I have no idea what I would do. I can be honest to a fault and never back down from standing up for what I believe in. If I were in your shoes there would be a pretty good chance MIL and me would become foes and cause problems forever haha. I am not good at biting me tongue when it's personal. Good luck and I hope you can make the best of it!

Actually I do have to add something funny (I find now) to add... when we started planning the wedding details over the summer she kept making suggestions that we obviously weren't interested in. My husband hasn't lived in the same state as his family for years, so he had her speak to me about EVERYTHING. I eventually had to tell her that with our deployments, short time to plan a wedding, move and immigration is a lot to handle and we just need to plan it on our own. No multiple weddings, no churches (they are Christian, I humanist, hubby Atheist) and all sorts of stuff. I offered to pay for her family to come to NY for our wedding to avoid problems. Apparently she didn't this because she told my Husband that I am controlling and he should make sure he knows what he's getting into! I told him to stand up for me but he didn't (he was still in Iraq and I was home at this point) so I emailed her indirectly saying all our plans are based on what her son asked for, and I am merely putting together the details since I was local. I was really insulted at the time and when he returned from Iraq we finally got to talk about it and he explained to her by phone that he ASKED me to make the arrangements based on his requests yada yada. He said she understood but I overheard a family member mention at the wedding that I like to be in control of things haha. At that point I just had to laugh. We got OUR wedding exactly the way we wanted. Both our families tried influencing us and we gave them both the same respectful no. They both still insist on home town receptions so I told them to tell us the time and place after the winter and we'll be there and can repeat our vows. We have no regrets. However when we made a trip to MI to visit them last weekend my MIL showed me the wedding announcement she had me write for the local paper (pretty much just a fill in the blanks). It was a small paragraph with a nice picture, we liked it but she said it's a right of passage for parents there and so she asked if we didn't mind if she could re-write it! Apparently she wanted a full page announcement... after showing us others haha. Never seen a thing like it. We answered her questions and she put together her own article. At the end of the day we are family now and respect one another's needs and wants. Unfortunately you can't say the same about a lot of people.

[Krikit 1,163]

Apparently she wanted a full page announcement... after showing us others haha. Never seen a thing like it.

Holy #######! I would have been mortified!

Now I want to see your announcement. lol

[Ban Hammer 13,110]

how to make inlaws leave soon.

[Geode 3]

Not exactly sure why I read this thread, but I do have two comments. If these are not appropriate, please have them deleted.

1. Remind her that fish and guest stink after three days.

2. Let her winterize her own damn jag.

[Udella&Wiz 325]

Apparently she wanted a full page announcement... after showing us others haha. Never seen a thing like it. We answered her questions and she put together her own article. At the end of the day we are family now and respect one another's needs and wants. Unfortunately you can't say the same about a lot of people.

Maybe she's been reading the NY Times a little too much ? Have you seen their overly snooty wedding announcement page? Makes me want to throw up - it's worse then the Globe and Mail society section.

Ms So and So will be Marrying Mr So and So June ## 2010. Ms graduated Magna cum laude with a horseshow up her a$$ while Mr graduated Summa Cum Laude with his law degree from Yale. They met while on safari in Africa doing humanitarian work while feeding starving children and saving endangered species. The bride promises to continue with her frou frou past times while the husband promises to continue playing golf and making a lot of money as a lawyer. The brides parents are lawyers and the grooms are Doctors. They plan to honeymoon in snootyland before returning to live in La-La Land.

Give me a freaking break

Edited December 13, 2010 by Udella&Wiz

[coraliesolms 47]

how to make inlaws leave soon.

THAT is exactly what I need. Im on day 3 of MIL visit... shes pushed a few buttons already, but nothing I cant handle. I did tell her, that if she wasnt going to buy anything, to please not come into my work because we are really busy this time of year.. so far so good, she hasnt popped in yet. I put the sheets she hates on her bed, because I dont have others, and she bitched for a bit and went out and bought 900 thread count sheets for all my beds!! So I cant complain too much.. but the 55 day visit has only just begun.

[Tater&Bugger 3]

Holy #######! I would have been mortified!

Now I want to see your announcement. lol

If I see it I'll totally post a copy! I don't know if ours came out a full page but that's what she wanted. They like descrive the bride's dress in detail, who all was there and where they came from haha. Thank god she didn't include out 70 person guest list hehe.