Tuesday!!

[Mithra 1,185]

I don't think it necessarily depends on maturity level or intelligence. There are lots of kids who are left alone for long periods at a young age and they're fine but they may not have been exactly safe just lucky. My children are highly intelligent (straight A's/honor roll, etc.) however, *I* don't feel comfortable leaving them alone for an extended period of time. They've never had to do latch key (thank God) as they've had family members to look after them until myself or my ex return home from work. I didn't have to do latch key either because I always had a parent around. Perhaps that is why I feel the way I do. Also, siblings tend to fight and bicker so leaving them alone together (at 10 & 14) may prove to be dangerous in some cases. I realize that this is not really the matter at hand. At any rate, I have my opinions and you have yours and what is good for you or anyone else may not be good for me and vice versa. My disagreement of the situation is merely my opinion, take it or leave it as you see fit.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

I agree we don't have to agree JVTA. Everybody is entitled to their own opinions and everybody is at their own level. That is what makes us all individuals. Sometimes people are able to offer us various insights into situations that we may not have considered before and that can be to our advantage or disadvantage. As individuals we all know our personal situations the best and what is right for ourselves and those we are in care of. People can respect or disrespect another for the choices the individual makes. In the end it's the individuals journey and that's the bottom line.

[mandyu1 5]

I think it has to do with both the maturity of the child and the situation in which they will be left alone. I had to travel for work not long ago for a few days and almost had to split all of my kids up because I couldnt find someone to watch them all. I called the Florida Dept of Child Services and asked if I left my 14 yr old alone would I be charged with neglect. The answer, no, and the reason being because I know my child and I know she is very mature and responsible for her age, I was leaving her with money, she has a phone, there were several neighbors around that were checking in on her and she could go for help if there was an emergency, I live in a gated community with 24hr gate security and my home has an alarm system. But in the end I didn't because thankfully a friend watched them all, but if I had to I would have done it. Now I wouldn't leave her alone for 3 weeks during the night, I feel that is just too long. But she is old enough come home from school at 3pm and be alone until the evening. As for my 10 yr old, I wouldn't trust him alone for a long period of time. He is no where near as mature as my daughter was at that age, but again, he can and has come home from school alone and stayed by himself for a few hours and has been fine.

I also think that a child can be smart as a whip, but have no common sense and be immature, and they can also be dumb as a nail (academically) but have good street skills and knows right from wrong. I know my daughter is very mature, and some people reading may say, how mature can she be at 14, but she helps care for the little one, she sometimes does the grocery shopping for me, she helps clean, can cook, do laundry, and is CPR certified, and I don't force her to do these things, or refuse to do them for her, but she knows I need help sometimes and she steps in. She has always been this way beause ever since she was a young child I have forced her to grow up fast. But even though I feel she is as mature as she is, I would never leave her alone at this age for a long period of time to care for 2 other children along with herself.

As for my parents, my mother doesn't have a problem with it and said she would watch them, its my father that has the problem. And some of it I'm sure has to do with my ex and also his experiene with his step-father, but he has always been controlling like this. If he doesn't agree then fine, thats his opinion, but don't use my kids as a way to keep me from going just because he's not happy he can't stop me, and then say "you better not take the kids there," they are my children and if I want to take them I will take them. So that statement right there shows he just wants to have control over the situation. And Cleo, yes if I took them it would interfere with their school, so I dont plan on taking them, I was just going to tell him that i was considering it since I don't have a sitter.

And the problem is that all of my family lives far away, I have no one here, so my only options are to not go, turn to friends, find outside help, or search for another family memeber to fly out here and watch them, but I would never leave my kids in a situation I wasnt comfortable in or with someone I didnt trust.

[And_Sam 44]

Happy Tuesday everyone and YES I am glad it's over!!

Mandy, I know what you mean about being controlling. With my family, its the opposite though. My mother is the martyr, who has the negative thoughts and voices extremely loud enough for the whole commonwealth to know.

My dad is more laid back and said that I was the one who always marched to a different drum, and it's true.

My parents knew about me going to Egypt. My dad said his piece and then told me that I was an adult and able to make my own decisions. He jus wanted an updated will and power of attourney for my real estate. *yeah dad, that REALLY scared me, NOT!*

My mom on the other hand, made comments, gestures, all but did skywriting trying to get me not to go. At the end, my parents made sure to leave the state the week before I was suppose to leave because my mom JUST KNEW that I needed her to watch my son. (Like I didn't all ready have plans made for my son to spend the summer with his adult sister. HA)

I think that it completely blew my mom out of the water when I really did go. Now that I reflect back on the whole situation, I like to think that it's because I was brave enough and sure enough in the love that I shared with my husband that perhaps my mom was a little jealous and I was doing something that she would never even consider on doing by herself.

You will make the right choices for your kids while you go. Taking them would be a great adventure, but I know you will make sure they are taken care of just the same.

Don't let anyone stop you with your dreams.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

We're on the phone now doing the Ramadan Kareem calls with family.

Goodnight MENA and to those practicing have a generous Ramadan.

Last one to leave tonight remember to turn the lights out.

[pumkin loves bear 2]

Mandy you better pack your bags because you're going on a guilt trip thanks to your parents.

There are plenty of other mothers on here that have left their kids in the care of others while going abroad. You're not a bad mother for taking care they will be watched over. Two of the kids are old enough to watch themselves but I wouldn't advising leaving them along for that length of time with the youngest yet. Kids go away to summer camp and are without parental supervision for longer than you're leaving your kids.

When I was going over to Egypt everyone knew 9 months before hand I got my ear chewed for those 9 months. They thought my head would get chopped off or I'd get kidnapped or he was using me for a green card. Believe me I heard it all from all my friends and family. Not one supported me except my best friend who had spent some time living with me and speaking to my husband online as well. People fear what they don't know and they care about us. This is more about them and their worries then it is about you and your kids. When they see you go there and come back safely it will become easier for them and eventually once you've done what you've set out to do they will accept your decisions and come to love him like you do. At least most of my family and friends have. There are those few who are too consumed with their own fear to even want to meet him at something as big as a family function, but that's like one or two myopic thinking persons.

Wonderful send a warm and happy birthday to your 7 year old today.

Good to see you Zee Bee! Best wishes on your ROC.

Hi Jeanne and Babyblueangel.

Ramadan Mubarak Everyone! We're getting ready here and this is our first Ramadan together. I'm getting over being sick and he's starting to get what I had.

when i was first going to egypt my family done me same way they was afraid i was gonna get killed or kidnapped or married and my husband wouldnt let me return home well i didnt listen and i went for 3 weeks and now i cant stay away i love it so much there and soon my husband will come here so proud of you for taking your stand and not listening to them cause people in egypt have great respect for women and some american men can take a few lessions from them good luck

[pumkin loves bear 2]

I think it has to do with both the maturity of the child and the situation in which they will be left alone. I had to travel for work not long ago for a few days and almost had to split all of my kids up because I couldnt find someone to watch them all. I called the Florida Dept of Child Services and asked if I left my 14 yr old alone would I be charged with neglect. The answer, no, and the reason being because I know my child and I know she is very mature and responsible for her age, I was leaving her with money, she has a phone, there were several neighbors around that were checking in on her and she could go for help if there was an emergency, I live in a gated community with 24hr gate security and my home has an alarm system. But in the end I didn't because thankfully a friend watched them all, but if I had to I would have done it. Now I wouldn't leave her alone for 3 weeks during the night, I feel that is just too long. But she is old enough come home from school at 3pm and be alone until the evening. As for my 10 yr old, I wouldn't trust him alone for a long period of time. He is no where near as mature as my daughter was at that age, but again, he can and has come home from school alone and stayed by himself for a few hours and has been fine.

I also think that a child can be smart as a whip, but have no common sense and be immature, and they can also be dumb as a nail (academically) but have good street skills and knows right from wrong. I know my daughter is very mature, and some people reading may say, how mature can she be at 14, but she helps care for the little one, she sometimes does the grocery shopping for me, she helps clean, can cook, do laundry, and is CPR certified, and I don't force her to do these things, or refuse to do them for her, but she knows I need help sometimes and she steps in. She has always been this way beause ever since she was a young child I have forced her to grow up fast. But even though I feel she is as mature as she is, I would never leave her alone at this age for a long period of time to care for 2 other children along with herself.

As for my parents, my mother doesn't have a problem with it and said she would watch them, its my father that has the problem. And some of it I'm sure has to do with my ex and also his experiene with his step-father, but he has always been controlling like this. If he doesn't agree then fine, thats his opinion, but don't use my kids as a way to keep me from going just because he's not happy he can't stop me, and then say "you better not take the kids there," they are my children and if I want to take them I will take them. So that statement right there shows he just wants to have control over the situation. And Cleo, yes if I took them it would interfere with their school, so I dont plan on taking them, I was just going to tell him that i was considering it since I don't have a sitter.

And the problem is that all of my family lives far away, I have no one here, so my only options are to not go, turn to friends, find outside help, or search for another family memeber to fly out here and watch them, but I would never leave my kids in a situation I wasnt comfortable in or with someone I didnt trust.

the state doent not allow children under 17 to stay alone over night by theirselves for weeks at a time no law will allow that and any women who would do that doesnt care what happens to their kids.mine is 16 and the state would take her for negilect so if anyone believe that about her well try it in usa and see what happens to u and your kids i have never left her home at night if neighbors new they call police cause its against the law in usa

[mandyu1 5]

the state doent not allow children under 17 to stay alone over night by theirselves for weeks at a time no law will allow that and any women who would do that doesnt care what happens to their kids.mine is 16 and the state would take her for negilect so if anyone believe that about her well try it in usa and see what happens to u and your kids i have never left her home at night if neighbors new they call police cause its against the law in usa

First I wouldn't leave me 14 year old alone 24/7 for weeks, but I would leave her for a couple of days if I had no other choice. And as I stated, I called the Department of Family Services and explained the situation and asked specifically if I would be charged with neglect and the answer was no. I asked what the age requirement was for a child to be left alone, and was told by them and the police that there is no set age, its up to the parents (obviously I would not leave me 4 yr old alone at any time), but typical age for being home alone during the day is 10 and evening/overnight is 14. Maybe in the state you live there are laws and age requirements, but where I live there is not.

[pumkin loves bear 2]

First I wouldn't leave me 14 year old alone 24/7 for weeks, but I would leave her for a couple of days if I had no other choice. And as I stated, I called the Department of Family Services and explained the situation and asked specifically if I would be charged with neglect and the answer was no. I asked what the age requirement was for a child to be left alone, and was told by them and the police that there is no set age, its up to the parents (obviously I would not leave me 4 yr old alone at any time), but typical age for being home alone during the day is 10 and evening/overnight is 14. Maybe in the state you live there are laws and age requirements, but where I live there is not.

lady im 52 years old and i know the dam law and no police or dept of welware will tell anyone they are no age limit on leaving children alone everyone here my believe it if so they come here and try it and see what happens they will be put in jail and kids taken away for negilect i see it every day here women go out to bars or stay alnight with men and leave kids home alone ages 8 thru 16 and they get them took away and go to jail any one here ask an american what will happen u go off to another stae for weeks and leave kids home alone what if they choked or someone break in get real woman no woman do their kids like that no job worth that or a dam man so get real i live here for 53 years almost and i know no parent leaves their 14 yr old home for 3 weeks or months or any kids younger they have to be 17.get real woman anyone here call family services and ask call police see what they do if u left your kids home over night alone this really piss me off that u sit here and say they agree they can be left alone well u must really need a man bad to do that.

[pumkin loves bear 2]

lady im 52 years old and i know the dam law and no police or dept of welware will tell anyone they are no age limit on leaving children alone everyone here my believe it if so they come here and try it and see what happens they will be put in jail and kids taken away for negilect i see it every day here women go out to bars or stay alnight with men and leave kids home alone ages 8 thru 16 and they get them took away and go to jail any one here ask an american what will happen u go off to another stae for weeks and leave kids home alone what if they choked or someone break in get real woman no woman do their kids like that no job worth that or a dam man so get real i live here for 53 years almost and i know no parent leaves their 14 yr old home for 3 weeks or months or any kids younger they have to be 17.get real woman anyone here call family services and ask call police see what they do if u left your kids home over night alone this really piss me off that u sit here and say they agree they can be left alone well u must really need a man bad to do that.

also looks like u only met him one time before u filed for k1 u have to meet at least twice before u file for k1 visa within a 2 years of filing

[mandyu1 5]

lady im 52 years old and i know the dam law and no police or dept of welware will tell anyone they are no age limit on leaving children alone everyone here my believe it if so they come here and try it and see what happens they will be put in jail and kids taken away for negilect i see it every day here women go out to bars or stay alnight with men and leave kids home alone ages 8 thru 16 and they get them took away and go to jail any one here ask an american what will happen u go off to another stae for weeks and leave kids home alone what if they choked or someone break in get real woman no woman do their kids like that no job worth that or a dam man so get real i live here for 53 years almost and i know no parent leaves their 14 yr old home for 3 weeks or months or any kids younger they have to be 17.get real woman anyone here call family services and ask call police see what they do if u left your kids home over night alone this really piss me off that u sit here and say they agree they can be left alone well u must really need a man bad to do that.

I don't care how old you are, and what part of "I WOULD NOT LEAVE MY CHILD HOME AT 14YRS OLD 24/7 FOR WEEKS" DONT U UNDERSTAND!!!!!!! And believe what you want to believe, I could care less, I know what I was told and I don't have to prove it to you or anyone else. And if you know the law so damn well and are so educated, why don't you stop talking so ignorant. I know who you are and you started problems on here about another woman. You think you know all about everyone and everything, when the truth is you know squat, so take your ignorant, old, low life self and stick what you think you know, up your a$$!!

also looks like u only met him one time before u filed for k1 u have to meet at least twice before u file for k1 visa within a 2 years of filing

ah no you don't, read the guidelines smart one!! And if I had to meet him twice why was it approved???

Edited August 11, 2010 by mandyu1

[Ban Hammer 13,283]

personal attacks about a poster needing a man, sticking it somewhere, and so on will not be tolerated. further posts along that line will result in recommended admin action on the poster.

[Ban Hammer 13,283]

also looks like u only met him one time before u filed for k1 u have to meet at least twice before u file for k1 visa within a 2 years of filing

incorrect. you must prove you met - it can be just one time within the 2 years of filing.

total of 1 posts removed, plus one quoting. post returned below that quoted a tos violation:

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_legal_age_a_child_can_be_left_home_alone_in_Florida

Edited August 11, 2010 by charles!

[pumkin loves bear 2]

First I wouldn't leave me 14 year old alone 24/7 for weeks, but I would leave her for a couple of days if I had no other choice. And as I stated, I called the Department of Family Services and explained the situation and asked specifically if I would be charged with neglect and the answer was no. I asked what the age requirement was for a child to be left alone, and was told by them and the police that there is no set age, its up to the parents (obviously I would not leave me 4 yr old alone at any time), but typical age for being home alone during the day is 10 and evening/overnight is 14. Maybe in the state you live there are laws and age requirements, but where I live there is not.

i see u from florida and i lived in florida for 5 years and the law is the same there also the law in united states is the same no matter where u live in usa so get real lady u must be hard up for a man to go this far i been married for long time many years and id never go off over night and leave my kids i have 4 and all grown and married except my 16

[Ban Hammer 13,283]

thread closed for review, global summoned.