Yardies a home and a farrin - Part 26!

[phillyfashionista 8]

I haven't been posting on here in a while, for my own reasons - But I have to comment here - because this just disgusts me -

Do you think that this thread started when you joined? People don't share? Look at the title of the thread - see it says Part TWENTY SIX???? That means since when the yardies first started their own thread - after taking over many other threads and being booted to the regional forums (yes, some members have been here that long) they have chatted up that many threads that have been shut down and locked and had to start a new thread - and if you could go back before the forum was upgraded, you would see that the threads would run to 1000 or more pages before they got locked - The members who have been here have been through the good and the bad, the thick and the thin - the denied visas, the approvals, the births, the losses, the divorces, the women coming on here with the same man, the cheaters, the good men - Trust me, there hasn't been much that hasn't happened in here.

The women that came on here and posted today have been through it all - either personally or seen it happen to people that they care about. People might have ways to put things that others think are harsh, but they tell the truth with no punches - trust me, I have born the brunt of some of those posts = but when you step back and read the meaning behind the words, and remove your hurt feeling - you can understand the truth in what they are saying and that they are trying to help. It's responses like this that make people walk away from this site and not share - Because people don't appreciate the value of the years of experience in it - the fact that some members grew up in JA and know what the transition feels like, or they have been married 2,3, 4, 5 years and dealt with it all - or are the immigrant themselves and offer a different perspective.

Everyone has their own personal reasons for sharing /not sharing on the board anymore - and if you bothered to read what has gone down in history, or what the older members say about why they don't share their experiences, you might understand it - The tone of this thread has completely changed, and it's become chat about how good your man laid it down last night, how you beat his azz, or then praying for forgiveness and asking God for his blessings - Something that seems a bit hypocritical, don't you think? And, as has happened before in a public forum, someone one day could very well end up in a similar situation where you've bragged so much about how your man has laid it down, the next woman goes and finds him and finds out for herself - Or people have been denied based on what they shared on here (immigration officers read this site too).

The purpose of this thread was to bring together a unique group of people who are all trying to have a successful relationship while navigating huge pitfalls that no one else can fully comprehend - because there are certain things that are very unique to this situation. If you want people to continue to share, you might want to try understanding where they come from, and that sometimes, they truly do know better.

Sus well said, WOW you said EVERYTHING that I was thinking ( get out of my head )

This is Real talk and I applaud all the Vets for coming on and voicing your opinions and sharing your wisdom!

This thread like you said has become something else and the reason for starting the thread initially has been lost and that is sad......

[Always Blessed 1]

Sus well said, WOW you said EVERYTHING that I was thinking ( get out of my head )

This is Real talk and I applaud all the Vets for coming on and voicing your opinions and sharing your wisdom!

This thread like you said has become something else and the reason for starting the thread initially has been lost and that is sad......

Hey Philly ! How have you been?

[sus 70]

Sus, I have to agree with you about being disgusted...but what disgusts me is that when a "VET" comes back and comments it is supposed to be received as the GOSPEL! No matter how tactless it is, how rudely stated or uninformed of previous conversations that led up to the situation leading to the post.....

No one said it was gospel, and no one said that it was said in the right manner - But over time of posting together, people get comfortable - the best analogy that I can make to it is imagine moving away from your family for a year or so - you come back for a family reunion, and there are new people there - Do you act all brand new and like you are the outsider, or do you act the same as you always did, and blurt out what you want to say in the manner you have always said it? That is exactly what happened here yesterday - and you have been here long enough to know that the posts were not meant in a malicious manner, that they were posted in the same tone as the posters have always posted things -

I am not sure where you are going with this other than to say that a lot has happened in here before??? Nobody doubts that and obviously people want opinions on situations thus is why they put it out there...and I didn't get the impression that anyone thought it was a newly started thread...but maybe you're just wanting props for the VET's??

Where did I ever say that I wanted props for the vets? You big up JG as being a valuable contributor (which she is) - yet Shemmy, who still posts here, has said a million and one times that she doesn't share things because people in here now, for the most part, don't want to hear it - All that they want to hear is that they are 100% right, and if you disagree with what was said, you made a personal attack on them.

NO, you got that wrong, it is attacks like this that make people not want to share!!!!

How and what in my post was an attack? And if it was an attack, why did I get so many PMs (and not from Vets) thanking me for saying what they wanted to say? This is what is twisted - Some people in here can't see an attack when it is plain as day, but try to twist words from others into an attack -

That's what is sooo twisted....people want to get experiences and views from different people..people who can possibly shed a different view...but it seems as though some VET's take offense and start throwing mud at the board with the "New Members". I constantly see comments on FB from VETS who talk about how BAD it is now,,...This thread is evolving and nothing stays the same but lets not act as if in the past there weren't similar issues, discussions, problems or debates.

No one ever said there weren't issues - but it never went to the pure gutter level that it has - and no matter what debates went on, people hashed it out and moved on - As evidenced by the previous posts, which aren't even worth the time it would take to quote and respond to the junior high level that they sunk to - Some people seem to feel that they should be the center of everyone's world, that their word is gospel, and that if you disagree with them, they hold a grudge for the rest of time - because of course, you must have a problem with them - they could never be wrong, could they? When people had disagreements, others have jumped into the disputes and voiced their opinion - but they never tried to turn it into the Junior High Bash fest that posts have risen to over the past year - Look at Dada and I as a classic example - we had our disagreement, others voiced their opinions, but didn't put judgment on either of us - We are over it, are cool with each other (I think, lol) and moved on - That is what the difference in this thread is now - Because there are a few members on here who simply can't do that and can't let it go - they thrive off drama, and continually try to stir it up without really and truly knowing what they are talking about. Whether they do it in public on the forum or in PMs, it's happening - We are all supposed to be grown women, isn't it time to act like it?

What I see as hypocritical is when Vets complain about how they don't come back on here because of how bad it is but can jump in from out of the blue and bash someone's post all under the guise of "experience" with Jamaicans...

How was it bashing - They saw something that made them feel the need to speak up, because they thought that maybe they could inject something that would help someone else - Ells was one who was supposedly "bashed" - but she read it, interpreted it, and gave a response to it without taking an attitude about it - I give Ells a lot of props for sharing what she has and taking ownership that her husband is not the only cause of problems in the relationship, and trying to take the steps to fix things - That is one of the hardest things in life, to recognize your own flaws, admit to them, and work on them - it takes a very strong person to do that.

:rofl: I find this so funny...the people who are still on this thread are sharing experiences...trying to learn and gain info from others but it is the VET's who have chosen to leave and not bring thier experiences and instead complain that people on the board tell too much of thier business...WOW talk about a contradictory statement!

Even the vets who stay have stated, over and over, that people do not what to hear what they say, and don't want to know their opinion unless they are agreeing with what the person did / said - So what is contradictory?

That is the bottom line MRStee....RESPECT!!!

And there is respect given to the vets? Never once did I say that what they said was right / wrong, how they said it was right / wrong - But they come on here trying to help in a situation that they feel they can maybe give some guidance in, based on their experience, and they are attacked for it? And you wonder why people don't come back to share?

[phillyfashionista 8]

THANK YOU LORD!!!! MY HUBBY GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!!!! WHOOO HOOOOOO Praise the LORD!! This was truly an unexpected blessing.

Stats: Full-time, M-F above minimum wage!

Aww my gosh, I'm so happy

AND TODAY IS HIS BIRTHDAY!! WHAT A GREAT GIFT

Nette mi gyal, I am so happy fi yuh!This is wonderful news :dance:

Mi a guh link yuh bout Y&R I got some spoilers fi yuh

You got me LMAO at the dynamite!!! Toni did release a new one a few months ago or are you talking about another one after that?

U been trying all dat to post two lines??

Umm this was not a good time to eat while reading VJ !!!

:rofl: Dada yuh a kill mi Star! yuh knoa mi wuk day is a hot mess haaaa I had so many things to say to replay to that post but by the time my day was ova mi too tiyad LMAO.

It was good chatting wid yuh Kuntry

#######??? all the people in here. isnt it past oonu bedtime...yuh affi go a wuk a mawning..

haaaaa now yuh know yuh made me LOL!

Baby girl don't get it convoluted, I don't need a leash and never will, I state what I states for laughs. If the man cheats and I find out about he can KEEP IT MOVING there are no RETURNS because like I stated earlier STD"S n AIDs are REAL, as far as me sounding ignorant, point out where I sound ignorant LIL GIRL, focus on you and yours before you try to be condesending towards a perfect stanger and please don't contractdict yourself."he came right back to me b/c he recognized there is none better than mine my dear" He came back because he knew you were enough to take him and if it was fire BOO he would have never left sniffing the other woman, and you say you sick of living from pay check to pay check, that's probably why the other woman sent him back to you because he didn't have any $$$$ for her. Life is a gamble and I'm all about my poker chips, SO PUT THAT ON YOUR RINGTONE!!! HOW BOUT IT!!

Mi luv dis line Bless me haaaaaa mi a tek it haaa

Bless der used to be dis girl named PHILLY who would come on and give us all de links to the new sound tracks that is how I know but she not come around no more or maybe like de odda duppies she might appear.. But yeah I memeba she sent us the link a few months ago and she said it was hot!!!

You own your own business in FL? You go mama !!!

Go back and read dammit!!!

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa uh miss deh Feva nuh true haaaaaaaa let mi knoa what yuh need mi a send it come!

[LadyC 1]

Good Morning Everyone...

ShaNette congrats on your hubby new job

[Shemmy 4]

Good morning VJ. I'm working on home today but can't log on properly...oh well.

Mrs. Tee - everything is good over here. We are planning on coming back to Philly this summer not sure when.

As far as the 4 generations - we take pics all the time. My grandmother is 87 but looks 57...I spend lots of time with her as possible.

[sugarapple 1]

2010 - 06:20 PM' timestamp='1273620028' post='3930489']

To GOD be the glory!!!!!!!!!!![/size]

thats great mama what you say you wanna comment (yep and she said something about you slapping yo man!!!

Thats what pisses me off yall lurk in here all day as guest trying to see our business and then wanna come on here like everything is okey dokey with yall and not posting nothing that goes on wrong!!!!!!

Dont come on here and talk about what I do if you cant be a woman and say what goes on in your house. Yes this is a public forum and we are suppose to be grown women giving and taking advice from all.

For example Nat says she will not put no personal business on here, thats fine and I also dont see her posting no hurtful Azz comment about other peoples posting, straight up keep it real, I have said that alot of times, if you dont share DONT COMMENT

BOOM THEM JQ!!!!!BOOM for every post after this one preach it..Forward!!!

[sugarapple 1]

No what interesting is how my hubby got approved for his visa for a CR1 because we were married and 6 months later I went for my step daughters interview and they sent me back for more info and guess what they wanted, OUR MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE

LOL you right one boy got turned away for the same thing and plus he did not have an support documents Lord!! But is is just a little delay.

[kjenkins86 5]

Goodmorning yardies, I hope everyone is having a great start to their day

With all that was said and done yesterday I just have one thing to say: It's not so much as what is said, it's how it's said and even though we're typing abd not talking, somewhere along the line when words are put in bold and sarcastic smileys are posted, people are going to respond.

Have a great day everyone.

i just want to say- i love my husband more than i ever thought possible

i am toooo excited b/c the embassy emailed me back saying they were going to schedule an interview for my step-son in june

this loss has shown me how important my family really is

i pray to God to cont. to bless us

God bless you and your family

Good morning Yardies:

My thought for today is that this board stay positive. We are adults and should behave as such. We all don't have to get along but let's try to respect one another. One of the things the moderators of VJ has been pleased with is that we don't fight/fuss/argue like alot of the other forums. With that thought in mind, it would be nice to keep things civil so that "newer" members will feel comfortable coming to this forum. Have a great day ladies

Thank you.

And this is why I said what I had to say and ended it right there.

Good morning! It's already Wednesday.

Sometime after I went to sleep (midnight), my wonderful husband cooked a ton of food. And his food is ALWAYS delicious. However, I will not be eating any of it. Why? He left it out all night! That wouldn't make him sick because he's done it for years & developed a resistance to the bacteria (I guess). However, I don't have a resistance and am not trying to catch food poisoning.

So how did I react when I woke up & saw all the food?

A) I calmly shook my head and chuckled over his good intentions gone wrong, the put the food away & finished getting ready for work.

B) I wailed, "Steven, Noooooooooooooooooo!" in a dramatic way & woke my husband up, then told him that he knows I don't eat food sitting out for more than a few hours.

I wish I had done A, but I let my emotions get the best of me. His feelings were very hurt.

Nat, if the house it hot )like it would be in JA) then don't eat it but if it's room temperature then it's fine IMO...

[Shemmy 4]

Sus well said, WOW you said EVERYTHING that I was thinking ( get out of my head )

This is Real talk and I applaud all the Vets for coming on and voicing your opinions and sharing your wisdom!

This thread like you said has become something else and the reason for starting the thread initially has been lost and that is sad......

Hey Philly...it is sad indeed. Some are too busy debating instead of listening and learning. If this info does not certain them ...why are their panties in a bunch?

[sugarapple 1]

No offense but oh really?

My hubby has the same problem and has the same excuse and over the years I've learned to ignore it, yes it hurts me to the core of my flipping heart but I can't see me being with someone else....So I understand what you're going through.

Your welcome with or without your drama, that is what we're all here for. To listen to good and bad things.

Goodluck

KJ no mind me cause it is true a man will do what they want..Why I find out his ex was up by the house just before mi reach asking him if they going to get together..HMMMPPPP Man and woman them both too bad none worst than the other. Well, well mi going just watch and wait. Cause like my mother says time longer than twine.

Everything everyone have the own decisions to make we can give our opionion but we have to be mindful of how we say things...

[bajankutie 4]

Good morning! It's already Wednesday.

Sometime after I went to sleep (midnight), my wonderful husband cooked a ton of food. And his food is ALWAYS delicious. However, I will not be eating any of it. Why? He left it out all night! That wouldn't make him sick because he's done it for years & developed a resistance to the bacteria (I guess). However, I don't have a resistance and am not trying to catch food poisoning.

So how did I react when I woke up & saw all the food?

A) I calmly shook my head and chuckled over his good intentions gone wrong, the put the food away & finished getting ready for work.

B) I wailed, "Steven, Noooooooooooooooooo!" in a dramatic way & woke my husband up, then told him that he knows I don't eat food sitting out for more than a few hours.

I wish I had done A, but I let my emotions get the best of me. His feelings were very hurt.

That is so funny you said that cause I saw my husband do that when I was in JA and I told him he crazy he needs to put it in the fridge and he said it will be good but I didn't eat anymore.

[LadyC 1]

Good morning! It's already Wednesday.

Sometime after I went to sleep (midnight), my wonderful husband cooked a ton of food. And his food is ALWAYS delicious. However, I will not be eating any of it. Why? He left it out all night! That wouldn't make him sick because he's done it for years & developed a resistance to the bacteria (I guess). However, I don't have a resistance and am not trying to catch food poisoning.

So how did I react when I woke up & saw all the food?

A) I calmly shook my head and chuckled over his good intentions gone wrong, the put the food away & finished getting ready for work.

B) I wailed, "Steven, Noooooooooooooooooo!" in a dramatic way & woke my husband up, then told him that he knows I don't eat food sitting out for more than a few hours.

I wish I had done A, but I let my emotions get the best of me. His feelings were very hurt.

Nat you made me laugh reading this.

But most west indian people dont believe in putting Hot food in the fridge. I know its silly but thats how they think. The food will still be good.

[phillyfashionista 8]

i just want to say- i love my husband more than i ever thought possible

i am toooo excited b/c the embassy emailed me back saying they were going to schedule an interview for my step-son in june

this loss has shown me how important my family really is

i pray to God to cont. to bless us

Hugs to you ((Jus)) and congrats on interview for your step-son God never sleeps!

Good morning Yardies:

My thought for today is that this board stay positive. We are adults and should behave as such. We all don't have to get along but let's try to respect one another. One of the things the moderators of VJ has been pleased with is that we don't fight/fuss/argue like alot of the other forums. With that thought in mind, it would be nice to keep things civil so that "newer" members will feel comfortable coming to this forum. Have a great day ladies

Its all about respect and respecting ppls opinions and posts but ppl need fi stop chat bout it and be about it!!

Hey Philly ! How have you been?

Hey Lady I am good ova here how you doin Sis

Good morning VJ. I'm working on home today but can't log on properly...oh well.

Mrs. Tee - everything is good over here. We are planning on coming back to Philly this summer not sure when.

As far as the 4 generations - we take pics all the time. My grandmother is 87 but looks 57...I spend lots of time with her as possible.

Shemmy (( waving)) that's whats up, I'll link yuh bout our vacation dates so we are coordinated!

Wow Shemmy, your Grammy is so blessed

[MoLuvsAcory 0]

Morning all!!! Hope every1 is doing well. I took off 2day b/c hubby has road test later today.

Stay positive ladies!!!!!!!! Later