Goldenheart Update....

[Visa4habibi! 0]

I am sorry for what's going on with your case. I wish you wouldn't have to chose and things would work out for you both. I'm pretty much getting close to the same thing, but i have two teenagers. The NVC or whoever is about to deny his visa (that's what the congress woman's office told me today) and if they deny it and appeal doesn't work - i have to decide too. I hate to even think about this! So, I know how you feel. My sons are 13 and 17 and the 17-year old just decided he wants to come live with us! And i don't know what to tell him just yet, but afraid it'll happen pretty soon. I"m sick and tired of everything and i can't cry anymore, but i still am.

I'm praying every day and i'm at the point of saying 'who cares'.

I just hope it's not going to come to you having to chose - ppl who make us chose should have to do the same and try being in our shoes!

Wish you the best of luck!

Tanya

[babybunny 2]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

see if your husband can move to Canada...

you move closer to the CA border..

you can still see your son. consider this option.

[goldenheart 0]

I would have to agree that I would pursue reapplying. I can tell you from past experience, leaving your child/children behind even for a short time is extremely traumatic to all involved. When I went to Egypt the last time with the intention of marrying Mohammed and then returning and processing a K3 I had no idea I would literally be stuck there for almost a YEAR due to paperwork snags. Finally I had to give up and come back. I stayed in communication with my kids and they understood what was happening, but it was hard for them. It was hard for me. It was hard for Mohammed. He listened to them cry. He held me when I cried. He cried. To this day we both bear guilt over it.

Conversely, we all also survived it intact. Life isn't always "ideal". We do what we have to. No one can tell you ultimately what YOU need to do. I am praying for you both.

Oh, and one thing to consider. There is a possibility that the "rudeness" on the part of the interviewers was part of their technique and not necessarily a personal attack although I can REALLY understand how it could sure as heck feel that way. In other words, the interviewers were possibly fishing for reaction or trying to leave him in a vulnerable space so they could feel him out better. Ugly, but the way of the world.

Thank you for sharing your story with me.

[goldenheart 0]

Thank you all for your inputs.

My fiance would never agree to me moving to Germany without my son, however, when a person does not see the light at the end of the tunnel only negative thoughts comes to mind.

As of now, I think the best opiton is to resubmit the documents and maintain our relationship. Eventhough we are both exhausted, I feel that Allah brought this man into my life for a reason and I pray we are both on the right path.

I really appreciate your support and PLEASE keep us in your duaa.

[goldenheart 0]

I am sorry for what's going on with your case. I wish you wouldn't have to chose and things would work out for you both. I'm pretty much getting close to the same thing, but i have two teenagers. The NVC or whoever is about to deny his visa (that's what the congress woman's office told me today) and if they deny it and appeal doesn't work - i have to decide too. I hate to even think about this! So, I know how you feel. My sons are 13 and 17 and the 17-year old just decided he wants to come live with us! And i don't know what to tell him just yet, but afraid it'll happen pretty soon. I"m sick and tired of everything and i can't cry anymore, but i still am.

I'm praying every day and i'm at the point of saying 'who cares'.

I just hope it's not going to come to you having to chose - ppl who make us chose should have to do the same and try being in our shoes!

Wish you the best of luck!

Tanya

I'm sorry to hear your pain too. I know what you mean about crying , sometimes I think I'm all cried out, but the tears seem to flow non-stop. Unlike you, I'm at the "who cares" point. I told my fiance today that the visa does not create our relationship. By the grace of Allah we love each other with or without a visa. If he never receive a visa or if we never experience a life where we share our home together, it does not mean I will stop loving him.

[Yasi 0]

I really appreciate your support and PLEASE keep us in your duaa.

You are in my prayers...

[Together4ever 1]

Thank you all for your inputs.

My fiance would never agree to me moving to Germany without my son, however, when a person does not see the light at the end of the tunnel only negative thoughts comes to mind.

As of now, I think the best opiton is to resubmit the documents and maintain our relationship. Eventhough we are both exhausted, I feel that Allah brought this man into my life for a reason and I pray we are both on the right path.

I really appreciate your support and PLEASE keep us in your duaa.

My prayers are with you. I know your situation is so hard emotionally. We are all behind you and here for you to carry you when you think you're too tired to take one more step.

[samir_shannon 0]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

i am so sorry. is there anyway to work something out to take him with you?

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

I'm interested in knowing what your lawyer's opinion is on this new development and I interpret that as a positive sign, based on the information you've shared. My recollection of the situation is that your fiancé refused to withdraw his application (due to his misunderstanding what was going on) and was therefore subject to a ban. If now you are being asked to submit a new petition, is there a chance that the decision to impose a ban has been reversed? It's wise to get a good handle on where the case is now. Please confer with your legal counsel.

[morocco4ever 63]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

I'm interested in knowing what your lawyer's opinion is on this new development and I interpret that as a positive sign, based on the information you've shared. My recollection of the situation is that your fiancé refused to withdraw his application (due to his misunderstanding what was going on) and was therefore subject to a ban. If now you are being asked to submit a new petition, is there a chance that the decision to impose a ban has been reversed? It's wise to get a good handle on where the case is now. Please confer with your legal counsel.

I think she has a valid point. I don't remember, did they revoke the petition?

[goldenheart 0]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

I'm interested in knowing what your lawyer's opinion is on this new development and I interpret that as a positive sign, based on the information you've shared. My recollection of the situation is that your fiancé refused to withdraw his application (due to his misunderstanding what was going on) and was therefore subject to a ban. If now you are being asked to submit a new petition, is there a chance that the decision to impose a ban has been reversed? It's wise to get a good handle on where the case is now. Please confer with your legal counsel.

Unfortunately, I had to fire my lawyer and I lost a lot of money dealing with him.

Yes my fiance has a 5 year ban because he did not wish to withdraw his application , because if he withdraw his application it meant he did not wish to come to USA for marriage. Unfortunately, I am a bit uneasy about this new petition because the NVC is responsible for issuing visa numbers on approved petitions from the service centers. Due to the fact we are not doing a new petition through the service center, it makes me wonder how they can process his application without a new petition.

I do not think the decision to impose a ban has been reversed, unfortunately, I think they are playing with our emotions.

Sadly, with the new application our response to the questions were different. We had to answer "Yes" to the questions of if he was ever excluded and "Yes" he has a 5 year ban against him....which are all reasons to deny his application.

We have decided not to allow this process to seperate us spiratually and emotionally. We just have to start our family in an untraditional way.

[

I think she has a valid point. I don't remember, did they revoke the petition?

They cancelled the visa and gave him a 5 year ban from the USA, due to coming without proper documentations and not withdrawing his application.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Asalaamu Aleykum,

My fiance was invited for an interview a few weeks ago, he thought the interview was to clear up the miscommunication at the POE. Unfortunately, the interview turned into a 3 hour interrogation session.

He said the CO asked him Why did your fiancee decided to be a Muslim?, Why did your fiancee divorce her X husband? He said all of the questions were BS questions. Well, he left the Embassy more frustrated then ever. Well, last Friday he received another Packet 3 and the Embassy stated that for further processing he must complete another visa application.

The problem is.....He does not trust them any more. The second part of the problem is...I don't trust the system either. We follow their rules, jump through hoops and exhausted all of our money for a simple K1 visa. I feel the only option I have is to leave my 7-year old son (due to joint custody) here in the USA and move to Germany I really hate that I've been force into a situation where my son will lose his mother I'm almost positive that If I have to leave my son, I will be no good for my fiance, due to depression of not being with my child

I'm interested in knowing what your lawyer's opinion is on this new development and I interpret that as a positive sign, based on the information you've shared. My recollection of the situation is that your fiancé refused to withdraw his application (due to his misunderstanding what was going on) and was therefore subject to a ban. If now you are being asked to submit a new petition, is there a chance that the decision to impose a ban has been reversed? It's wise to get a good handle on where the case is now. Please confer with your legal counsel.

Unfortunately, I had to fire my lawyer and I lost a lot of money dealing with him.

Yes my fiance has a 5 year ban because he did not wish to withdraw his application , because if he withdraw his application it meant he did not wish to come to USA for marriage. Unfortunately, I am a bit uneasy about this new petition because the NVC is responsible for issuing visa numbers on approved petitions from the service centers. Due to the fact we are not doing a new petition through the service center, it makes me wonder how they can process his application without a new petition.

I do not think the decision to impose a ban has been reversed, unfortunately, I think they are playing with our emotions.

Sadly, with the new application our response to the questions were different. We had to answer "Yes" to the questions of if he was ever excluded and "Yes" he has a 5 year ban against him....which are all reasons to deny his application.

We have decided not to allow this process to seperate us spiratually and emotionally. We just have to start our family in an untraditional way.

I think she has a valid point. I don't remember, did they revoke the petition?

They cancelled the visa and gave him a 5 year ban from the USA, due to coming without proper documentations and not withdrawing his application.

goldenheart,

I am concerned that you are contemplating addressing this new stage of the process without legal representation. Firing an attorney is your choice, of course, and predicated on believing that he/she is not serving your best interests, but your case has complications beyond the scope of any news group, and only an attorney familiar with the issue can give you proper guidance. If you honestly believe that 'playing with your emotions' is at hand, you really need representation to determine what is fact and what is perception. Please spend some time looking for someone you can have faith in.

Edited July 29, 2006 by diadromous mermaid