Yardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 3)

[Sbys 0]

...he started out with "The Brownie" --yes, it was a 1989 Celebrity. Nice and rusty and BROWN! It was so pretty . And it randomly died at stop signs He's glad to be rid of it now!

Don't talk about Brownie like that....cars have feelings too!! :lol:

Not THIS car!! But I did call it pretty

[phatmadame81 0]

Hi,Sybs I see you there,

How is the baby ( he is sooo cute) ?

How is mommy life treating you?

[ChristineJames 0]

To My Chicago family.....and whoever might be in town.....

The Link Up is set for Oct 14. We're meeting at Clark & Addison. Probably getting some dinner and then hitting the Wild Hare. Mindy & Roy.....you gotta come. Anna....please, you're my girl. And Jax....I don't know you too well but maybe you can get down there and we all could finally meet.

Any one every hear from Rita and Tashi. And what about you Rhonda....Chicago isnt too far of a ride. Is it????

Edited September 20, 2006 by ChristineJames

[Minfay 0]

All the screaming and insults before just made him so mad and withdrawn, but now I know how to get him to hear me, act all spoil and childish .

A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.....

The Link Up is set for Oct 14. We're meeting at Clark & Addison

Which corner???? :lol: What time?

Edited September 20, 2006 by Minfay

[Elizabethnhenry 0]

Ok, I have a new topic for you guys. Actually it is more of a question. How often does your man drink? Did he drink often in Jamaica? Does he drink more or less now than he did while living there? Is it an "issue"?

Michael is a recovered alcoholic now. He hasn't had a drink since the day he got here... so he's been sober for 11 months now He had a bit of a problem with rum, actually it was so bad that it was starting to damage his liver.

He was a completely different man when he drank so yeah, it was a HUGE issue for us. He actually quit a while before he got here, but when we started geting close to an approval on our K1 and him moving he here he kind freaked out and had a relapse. But all is back on track now and he's doing great. He goes to AA meetings every Tuesday.

I am so happy to hear of this! I admire him and you as well. Stay strong; you have been blessed with a beautiful family. I know how hard addiction is (mine is certain foods). I have lost 15 pounds on this plan that I am on and on some days I would give up my healthy lunch for a cadbury bar and some smarties...but I know I want to be healthy. I wish I could give Mike a hug and tell him I am proud of him.

[phatmadame81 0]

ladies sorry to bother but, I have just realized that I dont have a copy of the already prepared forms with me and i want to fax them today (seeing he is gonna go this week) fo rpacket 3 I need :

DS230 part 1 &2

DS156 or 156K ???????

DS157

Later this week I will send the rest of the evidence, before I go which system didyou guys use ( DHL, USPS, UPS ???)-

I won't be able to make it to the interview when we get it ( I am so upset about that) so I want to use a company that will gurantee that he gets it. Please help me out .

All the screaming and insults before just made him so mad and withdrawn, but now I know how to get him to hear me, act all spoil and childish .

A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.....

you are so right

Edited September 20, 2006 by desperatewife

[Minfay 0]

I'm not sure about the forms....it's been a year for us....I don't want to give you bad information so I will keep my big mouth shut

I sent things to Roy via Federal Express -- he lived in MoBay so it was really convenient. He just went to the office to pick it up.......It cost me $30.00 from Chicago.....Standard Delivery -- which was 4-5 days....BUT...it got to Mobay the next day.....only in Jamaica.

[phatmadame81 0]

thanks , I guess I will be usinghtem, I just want to make sure he get them.

[Minfay 0]

Roy had a "bad" address -- like, not deliverable to ......I did it so he had to pick it up at the FedEx office....we had no problems at all.

....you have been blessed with a beautiful family.

Isn't Elias just the cutest?!?!?

[luvtravlin 0]

Congrats Kelly

Where in Negril are you having your July wedding?

We'll be doing the renewals at Negril Gardens -where we met 2 yrs ago and I've been staying at for the past 9 yrs.

In regards to the drinking issue. That was a major issue when Craig 1st got here. He wanted to just "have a drink" at 10am on any day and I'm like....hooooold up a second !! We had MANY talks about being a "responsible" parental (type). He would LOVE to have a drink EVERY night that he comes home from work. I don't keep anything in the house. I did buy a 6 pack on the wedding night, that went quick. I'm a social drinker and could have a 6 pk in the fridge for a month. We went out on Friday night to a Reggae Sail on this tall ship (all you can drink) and then after that, we hit up some bars. We had such a great time, but he's a total lightweight!

Anyone have the following "issues" and/or "challenges"....cause these are our constant issues, or it can be the maturity (or lack there of).....

--We live in an apartment so that means you just can't go and sit in your car and have a drink and listen to music. You can do that IN your own home. He would not believe me that you can't have a drink (open) in your car....

--You can't just play music way loud at any hour.

--Can't leave the sliding glass door WIDE open when the air conditioning is on.

--Can't leave every flippin light and TV on in the house...especially here in Maryland when our electric bill just went up --was going to be 75%, but right now it's only 15% with an increase each year.

--When he 1st got here, he would hang out by a tree, by himself for hours. We live in the front of the building where there's lots of people going by......LOTS of "lookers", because I guess some would say he "looked" suspicious. We have VERY nosy neighbors that wouldn't hesitate to call management if someone sneezed improperly.

--He HATES to wear a seatbelt and sometimes "refuses" to wear one!!

This relathionship (and every aspect of it) is SUCH a challenge and I hope and pray that it only gets better with time !!!

Roy had a "bad" address -- like, not deliverable to ......I did it so he had to pick it up at the FedEx office....we had no problems at all.

....you have been blessed with a beautiful family.

Isn't Elias just the cutest?!?!?

Absolutely the cutest !!!!!!!!

[Minfay 0]

Kelly -- We haven't had any of "your' issues.....but.....Roy has gotten pulled over TWICE by our wonderful, local Police.....talk about Racial Profiling......when he is bored he rides around the neighborhood on his bike...guess the cops don't like that too much. At the rate he is going.....he will be pulled over by ALL the cops in our town by the time the month is over.

[Mrs. Palmer 5]

Congrats Kelly

Where in Negril are you having your July wedding?

We'll be doing the renewals at Negril Gardens -where we met 2 yrs ago and I've been staying at for the past 9 yrs.

In regards to the drinking issue. That was a major issue when Craig 1st got here. He wanted to just "have a drink" at 10am on any day and I'm like....hooooold up a second !! We had MANY talks about being a "responsible" parental (type). He would LOVE to have a drink EVERY night that he comes home from work. I don't keep anything in the house. I did buy a 6 pack on the wedding night, that went quick. I'm a social drinker and could have a 6 pk in the fridge for a month. We went out on Friday night to a Reggae Sail on this tall ship (all you can drink) and then after that, we hit up some bars. We had such a great time, but he's a total lightweight!

Anyone have the following "issues" and/or "challenges"....cause these are our constant issues, or it can be the maturity (or lack there of).....

--We live in an apartment so that means you just can't go and sit in your car and have a drink and listen to music. You can do that IN your own home. He would not believe me that you can't have a drink (open) in your car....

--You can't just play music way loud at any hour.

--Can't leave the sliding glass door WIDE open when the air conditioning is on.

--Can't leave every flippin light and TV on in the house...especially here in Maryland when our electric bill just went up --was going to be 75%, but right now it's only 15% with an increase each year.

--When he 1st got here, he would hang out by a tree, by himself for hours. We live in the front of the building where there's lots of people going by......LOTS of "lookers", because I guess some would say he "looked" suspicious. We have VERY nosy neighbors that wouldn't hesitate to call management if someone sneezed improperly.

--He HATES to wear a seatbelt and sometimes "refuses" to wear one!!

This relathionship (and every aspect of it) is SUCH a challenge and I hope and pray that it only gets better with time !!!

Hey Gregory and I haven't had those issues yet (namely because he's not here!), but I laughed to myself when I read this because I swear we have talked about this a MILLION times!! I think the hardest part for him is going to be not being able to play his music as loud as he wants (I too live in an apartment), and me not killing him for sitting with the sliding door open with the air on!! I know right now, that's gonna be it for us!! I tell him I can't afford to cool off the neighborhood!! He doesn't get it...With the whole drinking thing, I can just about say that that will also be an issue...because he will have drink on the boats at work, and he will have a beer in the morning (not all of the time). I told him that you can NEVER drink on the job at anytime--I don't even care if it's your break! And if you come in smelling like beer or alchohol, you will most likely be fired!! End of story!! And if he's fired, he can't live with me!! I know it will definitely be a challenge for him...I wish you 2 luck!!

Edited September 20, 2006 by Belly'sGirl

[Shemmy 4]

Ok, I have a new topic for you guys. Actually it is more of a question. How often does your man drink? Did he drink often in Jamaica? Does he drink more or less now than he did while living there? Is it an "issue"?

Michael is a recovered alcoholic now. He hasn't had a drink since the day he got here... so he's been sober for 11 months now He had a bit of a problem with rum, actually it was so bad that it was starting to damage his liver.

He was a completely different man when he drank so yeah, it was a HUGE issue for us. He actually quit a while before he got here, but when we started geting close to an approval on our K1 and him moving he here he kind freaked out and had a relapse. But all is back on track now and he's doing great. He goes to AA meetings every Tuesday.

I am so happy to hear of this! I admire him and you as well. Stay strong; you have been blessed with a beautiful family. I know how hard addiction is (mine is certain foods). I have lost 15 pounds on this plan that I am on and on some days I would give up my healthy lunch for a cadbury bar and some smarties...but I know I want to be healthy. I wish I could give Mike a hug and tell him I am proud of him.

Ditto. Tell Michael to keep up the good work That is great.

Damien doesn't drink as much as he did while living in Jamaica. We usually don't keep liquor in the house. He'll have a drink and two whenever we go to the club or sometimes at dinner. What I don't like about his drinking is that he'll drink up every drop of beer or liquor whenever we're invited to a family or friends house. That really ticks me because I told him that it's rude. Just because people offer you a drink - does not mean to drink up everything....especially when you show up empty handed. It only happened a few times but still

[kimlbs 0]

Good Morning

Ok, I have a new topic for you guys. Actually it is more of a question. How often does your man drink? Did he drink often in Jamaica? Does he drink more or less now than he did while living there? Is it an "issue"?

The only "real" fights that Roy and I have had have been about alcohol. I am not sure how much he drank in Jamaica -- I never saw him drunk or thought it was excessive when I was there. Since he has been here -- I have never seen him drunk either.

Roy seems to drink when he is bored and home alone <that's when the alarms when off in my head> He has cleaned out my Vodka stock (three bottles in total) in the freezer.....it took me a while to notice the bottles were gone so I am really not sure how long it actually took him......about three months.

Now, I don't bring any "hard alcohol" into the house. Just the occasional six pack of beer. And that is very seldom. I can also tell you that he will have a drink (be it beer or something harder) before he goes to work or an interview. I think it's a bit of liquid courage.....maybe.....

Rhonda, like you, I am a social drinker and don't miss it not being in the house. It makes our life so much easier not having to worry about that. It's not worth the aggravation for me to have it in the house for me to drink occasionally.

OH YEAH -- and a really weird thing -- when we go out for dinner or something, I am the one who is dying for a drink -- and he usually orders a coke......go figure. He's a "closet" drinker....the worse kind.

The post office was closed by the time we got done so it will officially be mailed tomorrow......I just hope I did everything correctly and did not forget anything.........

make sure you make two copies of the whole packet. Good job getting it done! I know what a PITA (paininthea$$) it can be.

Yeah, don't forget to make those copies -- of the checks too!!

Oh NO...Oh SHIZNIT.....I only made one copy of the darned packet and forgot to make copies of the cashier checks...............I have the copies of the cashier check recipts with check number form the bank...Am I doomed??????

[kimlbs 0]

Okay...AOS/EAD officially mailed...we are on to STEP 2... I am afraid to say......the waiting begins...once again

Okay....now to the topic at hand......drinking!!!

This is not an issue for us......I do not drink and Duane was never a big drinker in Jamaica...the occasional Magnum....he brought back 24 Magnums when he arrived and they lasted up until a couple hweeks ago but he did share them with friends......I have some wine coolers and a six pack of beer in the fridge and it has been ther since he arrived. He has the occasional drink whne we go out to a club but it is very little...

Miss Kelly....You are correct.....keeping an open container of liquor in the car will give you a fat whooping ticket in Cali....Also......sitting in the car drinking and playing music just sounds kinda weird. If he is looking for some "alone" time, tell him to go into your bedroom and play his music and have a drink....you do those things inside the house...not on the street!!

As for the the air conditioning and lights....you need to explain it to him and make him pay the gas/electric bill.....that will definitely make him more aware of the cost issue.......as for the seat belt...he needs to get a ticket and make him pay for it...I bet you he will wear the darned seat belt after he gets pulled over and ticketed!!! I DID!!!! If I may add my 2 cents.....it sounds like more of a "control" issue for Craig and it sounds like he is rebelling against all the crazy American rules and he does not like being told what to do.....this is typical of most men..especially those hard-headed Jamaican men........try to explain that things are different and he needs to adjust to the laws of this Country.....it may take time but he will come around..especially if he starts having to pay the consequences of not listening......time should heal all of these issues......

NEW TOPIC.......

So most ALL of you told me that our relationship in Jamaica was going to be a totally different relationship in America....Before he got here.....I thought...yeah whatever....we are soo close and I know him sooooo well so our relationship will be NO DIFFERENT.... BULLSHIZNIT...........Boy was I WRONG.....the whole dynamics is different........not that our relationship is worst but just VERY different.........when the real world hits you, the whole vibe is different...plus.... in Jamaica...he was in control for the most part and now I am in control...this is very different and very hard on a man.....How did you get over this? How long did it take for the adjustment? What advice would you give to some of us that are just now going through this and for those that will soon learn what I am talking about........