Wedding Details

[ScooterMac 2]

Maybe you need to get a hold of him again and get a straight Yes/No answer out of him.

Tell him that you guys can't keep planning on hold for him, or something like that.

I mean, it's kind of rude for someone in your wedding party to not do what they're supposed to when you really need them to.

Two times ago when we talked, he said he'd have the money to do it after his next paycheck (get fitted, which is a $20 downpayment).

The last time we talked, he told me that he wasn't sure he'd have the money to pay for his tux (which Spoom agreed to cover, because we know his finanaces aren't exactly rockin' right now), and that he'd lost his job. He told me he wasn't sure where he'd be living by January, and that he might be moving back across the country. He said if he moved, he *might* be able to make it back for the wedding, but only if he hadn't found a job. He said on the off chance that he moved and was able to make it back, someone would have to pay for his bus/air ticket and hotel rooms. This is an expense we (obviously) can't cover.

Basically, he told me last time we talked that he didn't know if he'd be able to be here, even as a guest, because he didn't know where he'd be living by the time the wedding rolled around. Life changes pretty quick for him, but it's frustrating to know that one of your best friends puts your wedding at the end of his priority list.

[Peachey 10]

Sounds like he's taking himself out of the wedding party.

I would have a talk and explain your situation. He should understand.

[CDAgirlMI 51]

Sort of on topic-ish....

Have any of you guys had to "un-invite" someone from your wedding party?

Backstory: Spoom invited one of our close mutual friends to be one of his groomsmen. Since the invitation was accepted this guy has lived in 3 different states, has held (and lost) 3 different jobs and has no savings. He hasn't gotten fitted for his tux yet. The last time I talked to him for any length of time (his cell phone's been shut off most of the time recently) he told me he was considering moving across the country to be closer to his kid, and that he might be doing that before our wedding.

Obviously, this kind of "Will I be there, or won't I" is going to cause us more stress, but I feel really bad un-inviting him (from the bridal party, not the wedding). What's the best (nicest?) way to go about this?

maybe give him a deadline. Say "We need to have such and such done by this date". Tell him you understand the situation he's in & that it's fine if he can't be a groomsman for whatever reason, you just need to get things in order & would like to know.

[Nik+Heather 121]

Maybe you need to get a hold of him again and get a straight Yes/No answer out of him.

Tell him that you guys can't keep planning on hold for him, or something like that.

I mean, it's kind of rude for someone in your wedding party to not do what they're supposed to when you really need them to.

Two times ago when we talked, he said he'd have the money to do it after his next paycheck (get fitted, which is a $20 downpayment).

The last time we talked, he told me that he wasn't sure he'd have the money to pay for his tux (which Spoom agreed to cover, because we know his finanaces aren't exactly rockin' right now), and that he'd lost his job. He told me he wasn't sure where he'd be living by January, and that he might be moving back across the country. He said if he moved, he *might* be able to make it back for the wedding, but only if he hadn't found a job. He said on the off chance that he moved and was able to make it back, someone would have to pay for his bus/air ticket and hotel rooms. This is an expense we (obviously) can't cover.

Basically, he told me last time we talked that he didn't know if he'd be able to be here, even as a guest, because he didn't know where he'd be living by the time the wedding rolled around. Life changes pretty quick for him, but it's frustrating to know that one of your best friends puts your wedding at the end of his priority list.

My room mate moved to the Czech Republic the *week* before the wedding. Up until the week before she left, the plans were still quite half baked. I don't blame her too much, it was a work/expat thing, but still, it made waves with our wedding plans. We told her we'd make sure there was a chair for her, and we would be glad to see her, but understanding if not. I think that's a good approach for you.

[Rhiannercakes 14]

We booked our chapel yesterday.

Thank you to Bern for pointing out this lovely chapel in Vegas.

It's so inexpensive for what you get!

Now we need to find a restaurant.

I just hope my parents don't drag me around the strip in my wedding dress like they said they would

[darkchilde794 5]

I am getting married next Wednesday! I am so excited.

I hope that all my bad luck for this month has been used up by the Canada Post experience, and that everything else will be smooth sailing for POE and all the "marital plans", next week.

I just found out that an aunt and her family from NC are driving for the event, and that our photographer can make it for the court house ceremony. And my entire family is coming -- which was a huge surprise as it would be the middle of the school week and both my siblings are in school.

Our plan is to do the court house event, have champagne/appetizers at my future mum-in-law's house and dinner at the restaurant where my fiance and I had our first date.

Then my mum, grandma, aunt and future MIL are teaming up to throw us a wedding ceremony on Saturday... and apparently the guest list is now up to 60. My hunny and I are just planning to show up... I think it's just best to leave all the planning to them

I believe between the wedding event, ceremony and Thanksgiving at both our sides, I will be doing a lot of eating. I should start looking for my stretchy pants!

[Rhiannercakes 14]

I am getting married next Wednesday! I am so excited.

I hope that all my bad luck for this month has been used up by the Canada Post experience, and that everything else will be smooth sailing for POE and all the "marital plans", next week.

I just found out that an aunt and her family from NC are driving for the event, and that our photographer can make it for the court house ceremony. And my entire family is coming -- which was a huge surprise as it would be the middle of the school week and both my siblings are in school.

Our plan is to do the court house event, have champagne/appetizers at my future mum-in-law's house and dinner at the restaurant where my fiance and I had our first date.

Then my mum, grandma, aunt and future MIL are teaming up to throw us a wedding ceremony on Saturday... and apparently the guest list is now up to 60. My hunny and I are just planning to show up... I think it's just best to leave all the planning to them

I believe between the wedding event, ceremony and Thanksgiving at both our sides, I will be doing a lot of eating. I should start looking for my stretchy pants!

Wow, 60 people is alot.

I don't even think my wedding will top 20

[Bern. 3]

I am getting married next Wednesday! I am so excited.

I hope that all my bad luck for this month has been used up by the Canada Post experience, and that everything else will be smooth sailing for POE and all the "marital plans", next week.

I just found out that an aunt and her family from NC are driving for the event, and that our photographer can make it for the court house ceremony. And my entire family is coming -- which was a huge surprise as it would be the middle of the school week and both my siblings are in school.

Our plan is to do the court house event, have champagne/appetizers at my future mum-in-law's house and dinner at the restaurant where my fiance and I had our first date.

Then my mum, grandma, aunt and future MIL are teaming up to throw us a wedding ceremony on Saturday... and apparently the guest list is now up to 60. My hunny and I are just planning to show up... I think it's just best to leave all the planning to them

I believe between the wedding event, ceremony and Thanksgiving at both our sides, I will be doing a lot of eating. I should start looking for my stretchy pants!

Wow, 60 people is alot.

I don't even think my wedding will top 20

You never know...I planned for 10 people to show for my wedding, and then over 20 showed up...it was interesting to say the least. And if you are going to wear heels when you get married...and then after, if you plan on heading to the strip, I suggest bringing a pair of flats or something. As well...what wedding package did you get? PS...I found your wedding date on the website. Can't wait to see the pictures ^o^ Ohhohoh. I'm not a stalker at all!

Edited November 21, 2009 by Bern.

[ScooterMac 2]

I am getting married next Wednesday! I am so excited.

I hope that all my bad luck for this month has been used up by the Canada Post experience, and that everything else will be smooth sailing for POE and all the "marital plans", next week.

I just found out that an aunt and her family from NC are driving for the event, and that our photographer can make it for the court house ceremony. And my entire family is coming -- which was a huge surprise as it would be the middle of the school week and both my siblings are in school.

Our plan is to do the court house event, have champagne/appetizers at my future mum-in-law's house and dinner at the restaurant where my fiance and I had our first date.

Then my mum, grandma, aunt and future MIL are teaming up to throw us a wedding ceremony on Saturday... and apparently the guest list is now up to 60. My hunny and I are just planning to show up... I think it's just best to leave all the planning to them

I believe between the wedding event, ceremony and Thanksgiving at both our sides, I will be doing a lot of eating. I should start looking for my stretchy pants!

Wow, 60 people is alot.

I don't even think my wedding will top 20

The final count for total people invited to ours.....260.

Now, some of those people are way far away, and we know won't be able to make it (older family members, college/underpaid friends, etc) and they say to estimate that 10% of invited people won't show....so we're estimating somewhere between 200-220 for the wedding.

Y'know, now that I think about it, I'm not sure how we're gonna fit all those people in my tiny country church! lol

[Rhiannercakes 14]

I am getting married next Wednesday! I am so excited.

I hope that all my bad luck for this month has been used up by the Canada Post experience, and that everything else will be smooth sailing for POE and all the "marital plans", next week.

I just found out that an aunt and her family from NC are driving for the event, and that our photographer can make it for the court house ceremony. And my entire family is coming -- which was a huge surprise as it would be the middle of the school week and both my siblings are in school.

Our plan is to do the court house event, have champagne/appetizers at my future mum-in-law's house and dinner at the restaurant where my fiance and I had our first date.

Then my mum, grandma, aunt and future MIL are teaming up to throw us a wedding ceremony on Saturday... and apparently the guest list is now up to 60. My hunny and I are just planning to show up... I think it's just best to leave all the planning to them

I believe between the wedding event, ceremony and Thanksgiving at both our sides, I will be doing a lot of eating. I should start looking for my stretchy pants!

Wow, 60 people is alot.

I don't even think my wedding will top 20

You never know...I planned for 10 people to show for my wedding, and then over 20 showed up...it was interesting to say the least. And if you are going to wear heels when you get married...and then after, if you plan on heading to the strip, I suggest bringing a pair of flats or something. As well...what wedding package did you get? PS...I found your wedding date on the website. Can't wait to see the pictures ^o^ Ohhohoh. I'm not a stalker at all!

We got the traditional package + 30 extra minutes on the grounds. We're looking into either the tux rental or that service where they take you to get your marriage license etc. Looking at ordering the cake from them as well, but we're not sure yet.

@ ScooterMac

I dont even have 260 people to invite. My family is tiny and alot of people on my dad's side are on bad terms with eachother or on bad terms with my dad, so yeah. And the two people we could invite from his side are going on vacation in December, so they probably wouldn't be able to afford it.

I'd prefer a smaller wedding anyway.

[Wyatt's Torch 45]

I just gotta say...I'm glad that some folks find 60 to be a fairly big crowd. I had about 60 at my wedding and it felt big to me too. Mind you, my mother-in-law's side is Italian, so that made up a large chunk of that number. All those Marios and Marcos...

[darkchilde794 5]

I just gotta say...I'm glad that some folks find 60 to be a fairly big crowd. I had about 60 at my wedding and it felt big to me too. Mind you, my mother-in-law's side is Italian, so that made up a large chunk of that number. All those Marios and Marcos...

Haha I agree. My fiance's family is Italian by heritage and the 45 people coming are just from his side, and are just the brother and sister + spouses + kids of his parents. No Marios and Marcos though...

We've both agreed that we will just invite family members for both the civil and ceremonial nuptials as that would essentially be 80 guests already. But who knows -- a lot of my friends from both the Philippines and Canada are hinting that they want to attend the ceremonial event in 2011, so maybe we would reconsider our numbers.

[Krikit 1,164]

The final count for total people invited to ours.....260.

Whoa. Do the thing where people have to pin money to your dress! Even if they only each give a dollar...... lol

[Colleens 40]

My first wedding we had over 400 people for dinner and about 600 at the reception. And only about 40 were family/friends of mine. It was mostly my -in-laws who had insisted that they invite people they had worked with over the years, and family members they see maybe every 5 years. And I am not a person to make waves, so as long as they were paying for it....I agreed. In hindsight I should have said no. I spent the whole night talking to people I didn't know and would never see again. This time we are thinking about doing something small in Florida..in the Orlando area, just family and a few close friends, so in the 50 people range. I have a lot of young nieces and nephews that would love the chance to go to disney etc, so my family and friend coming from Canada will be able to make a nice vacation out of it (and disney passes will make a good Christmas present!!!). If anyone had an orlando area wedding I would be interested in hearing details. I have started looking at some resorts, but there are soooo many to choose from!

[Marilyn. 340]

we had about 16 people at our wedding ceremony and that included the marriage commissioner and the wedding party..

at the reception we had maybe 25 people..