Yardies at home and Farrin (part13)

[sus 70]

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

I need a GALLON of rum creame

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

Sussssssssss; where is my rum cream?

[sus 70]

LOL - I didn't even bring any back with me this trip - just coffee -

I need a gallon of Midol today!

[Islandwoman 0]

Totally agree, Know of someone who had problems at home but never documented anything. Her co-worker who she opened up to documented everything even her daying if she does not show up to work ..yada, yada yada. this was used to convict the husband...her co-worker's documentation.

That's a good friend - she was blessed to have her in her time of need.

[Islandwoman 0]

exactly Jai...how r u?

many ppl on here fail to see what is infront of the..as if this man is some how "better", "more honest" etc, than the ones infront of us..OPEN UR EYES...asking for money never starts right away!

I don't see it quite that way - just that if they are here, they are more in your face so you tend to it clearer. Sometimes it hard to see things clearly over the phone and on a couple trips a year.

[Islandwoman 0]

My guy recently paid 150 us for 5 vaccines at mobayhope, plus a tip 'to make it good'...whatever the going bribery charge is. The police records cost $100 us. I never believe in the set fee...it is all subject to change ..and who's asking.

If anyone needs a great place to stay close to Mobay airport...my friend in Coral Garden has a villa up on the hill, awesome views, safe...3 gen of women, cooking up the best homestyle , very reasonable rates for both rooms in the main house and a single studio apt/kitchenette. These people are GREAT and can take great care of both short or longer visits. Hit me up for details if you like.

ya know this economy is hitting Jamaica real hard, and i get lots of requests to help out. i'm almost about to change my number ...but waiting to get this interview passage to go thru, then many changes ahead. But how do you deal with the money requests...or bring this/that for everyone...and those you haven't met yet!!!

Oh, i'm dying for some spooning........

Hi Culture.

I dont think anyone here is better equipped to answer this question than me. I visit my SO every month in Negril SINCE APRIL 2007. (I have the passport to prove it) And the way I deal with request is I say NO!!!!

First of all you have to pay for what they are asking for.(mOST OF THE PEOPLE ASKING WILL PROMISE TO PAY "you back", can someone please start a forum on how many people recieved their money back !!! I can wait!)

Then you have to pay the cost of your checked baggage. If you get "Caught up" in customs you could be responsible for paying duty! And above all you will never be able to keep up with the request! Each time you bring a requested item. YOU WILL HAVE MORE DAYUM REQUEST!

The man that sells chicken in town in Negril told my SO to ask me to bring him a microwave!!! My SO told him NOT "go to hell" But go to Sav! Sav La mAR THAT IS , BIG STORES WITH CHEAPPER ######! LMAO

Seriously though. Apply a level of common sense. If you are the type of woman who bought alot things for you last relationship in the states. And you are still "NOT HAPPLY INVOLVED WITH THAT PERSON". Then understand that saying "No will kill this relationship, If it is ment to be"

I challenge some of the ladies to eliminate the monitary investments, gifts, and treats of the relationships for 60 days and see if the relationship is still so happy or even exsistent.

Remember ladies we can only be "USED" if we allow ourselves to be "USED UP"

[MrsBuggy 0]

Good Morning yardies! Hope everyone is well! I have no idea what has been going on cuz I have not been on here in a few days... so I will have to catch up this afternoon.

Congrats on any good news that I've missed!!!!

My hubby is STILL not here... am expecting him this weekend!!!

Talk to ya'll later! Have a great day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Islandwoman 0]

Yes, you ladies are right. I may need to take a hard stance with him. If we run out of digicel minutes on this plan, I'm thinking we'll just have to go several days without speaking. Perhaps that will finally motivate him to get a chip like I've been requesting. He just doesn't get it that if he spends a little extra one time, it'll pay off later. Instead, he'll blow through several hundred in credits because he wants to call every day rather than forking over $1000 to get to talk much MUCH longer.

And I know he was surviving however he could before and that's why I refuse to be his 'western union mama' for any reason other than taking care of this visa business. I figure if he got by before me, he just has to get by now without my help. He doesn't ask and I don't offer. But sometimes when it comes to some of these other issues, we have a struggle. The one good thing he did this week on his own was get passport photos for this visa business he has to take care of next week. So, I am glad about that but I just wish he'd go get than damn chip and do MORE for his part!

I've known him since Nov 07....not long compared to some but I did take my time with all of this and really thought long and hard before undertaking this process. The one thing about having a mostly phone relationship is that you can't get distracted by the 'other' stuff and you have to focus on issues and your values and what matters to you both and how you'll resolve things.

Sorry Ells...but that is not necessarily true. The only distraction that is eliminated by a phone relationship is actual sexual intercourse. There is a lot of non-verbal communication that is missed with phone conversations. A lot can be discerned from non-verbal communication, and we don't have that luxury most times. Therefore, words without action are simply that...words. Buying a $100 credit from your last $150 is making an effort. However, buying $100 digicel credit to say "Babes call mi back nuh credit dun"...is by no means effort or equal contribution. He is simply saving much of the card balance for local calls later. I also know from my own cheap experiences trying to call my kids that $100 JA (ask me why I was determined not to buy higher denominations...LOL) will not get a long phone call back to the States. You may get 10-15 minutes using the entire credit. Lets call a spade a spade for real for real.

Unfortunately, you can "talk" until you are blue in the face about problem resolution, values and matters of priority but until you see those words in action...bank on the very real fact that you do not know your man. Every couple in an LDR or any marriage that didn't involve a period of "shacking" will have a period of adjustment and re-learning how to run their household...no matter what was discussed previously. If you don't believe this, then you are fooling yourself and in for a lot of disappointments initially.

Not directed at you Ells or any one person on this thread...just an observations that makes me sad

I find it sad and disheartening that some of the women on this thread find it necessary to list disclaimers against "potential red flags" (ie...I've known him xyz amount of time, I prayed and asked God about this relationship and if this was the best step for me...I NEVER send money to my man or his family, I only stay at his place in Jamaica or I've met his entire family and for the most part they love me...etc. etc.)

I would feel so much better if we could just stand behind the merit of our relationships period...without validating that we are well aware and avoiding the "normal" perceived pit falls of a Jamaican LDR. Every woman is blessed with intuition, and the only time we start giving disclaimers when discussing the relationship is when we feel something in our gut is off (my observations and opinion). If you feel something is off...it usually is. Now, if you decide to overlook, store it away for future use, pick your battles, or address the discomfort is entirely up to you and your partner. A good healthy and fulfilling relationship doesn't need a defense attorney...it will be reflected as such (even with normal relationship issues).

All this to say...nobody on this board or in your off board relationships can tell you what is real or fake in your relationship. Your intuition told you long before you typed the first disclaimer IMO. People are going to think what they want to think regardless.

If you were in a non-LDR relationship, would you immediately start a conversation with "Now I know I have only been with Jimmy for a little less than a year...but I have thought long and hard about this relationship and us going to the next level. I don't give him money/gifts and he never asks for anything either. We talk all the time about our values and goals and we really know each other pretty well now?"

Nope...you would just say "Girl...Jimmy asked me to move in with him the other day. I'm thinking about going for it...life is short so...hell...why not? I found this nice _____ (fill in the blank) for him too at xyz store...you think he will like it?"...and keep it moving. Am I right or wrong?

Damn this insomnia. LOL

Jawi....you think real deep at 3:00 am!!

[Islandwoman 0]

Hi Culture. (i EDITED MY LAST REPLY SORRY)

I dont think anyone here is better equipped to answer this question than me. I visit my SO every month in Negril SINCE APRIL 2007. (I have the passport to prove it) And the way I deal with request is I say NO!!!!

First of all, you have to pay for what they are asking for.(MOST OF THE PEOPLE ASKING WILL PROMISE TO PAY "you back"), can someone please start a forum on how many people recieved their money back !!! I can wait!)

Then you have to pay the cost of your checked baggage AND POSSIBLE OVER WEIGHT.

If you get "Caught up" in customs you could be responsible for paying duty!

And above all you will never be able to keep up with the request!

Each time you bring a requested item. YOU WILL HAVE MORE DAYUM REQUEST!

Example!

The man that sells chicken in town in Negril told my SO to ask me to bring him a microwave!!! My SO told him NOT "go to hell" But go to Sav! Sav La mAR THAT IS , BIG STORES WITH CHEAPPER ######! LMAO

Rember ladies: What you start doing in the begining of the relationship , you will be expected to continue! (That also applies to lowering your standards! If you lowered them to get Him you have to keep your standards low to KEEP HIM! So if you thought it was cute to "Smoke a little with him on the beach. Lets see how your "Non Smoking Azz" is going to like it when he lands in the States and is Smoking like a chimney in yo house or "Fireing up in front of yo mama/ friends/ coworkers ect) lmao

Seriously though. Apply a level of common sense. If you are the type of woman who bought alot things for your last relationship in the states. And you are still "NOT HAPPLY INVOLVED WITH THAT PERSON". Dont waste your money trying to buy this one!

Understand that saying "No will kill this relationship, If it is ment to be"

I challenge some of the ladies to eliminate the monitary investments, CARS, gifts, and treats of the relationships for 60 days and see if the relationship is still so happy or even exsistent.

Remember ladies we can only be "USED" if we allow ourselves to be "USED UP"

Some could say that your "monthly" visits are monetary investments and a way (even if temporarily and you stay with him at his home) for him to have an improved quality of life. A lot of the men in Jamaica don't eat as well until their lady comes in town and goes grocery shopping...some don't even get to watch TV until their wifey tells him the hotel room number. Some don't even have the $$ to attend a party at M'ville...the Jungle...Alfreds...xyz until wifey comes in town...and when they go to local street dance dem a beg and look a drink.

I just think that we put entirely too much weight on whether or not we provide money or gifts to our men as to whether it is a real relationship or not. There are SO many other ways a man can use a woman without ever touching her wallet/purse/bank account. If he is that type of man...trust me you are not going to be his only source of income anyway. He can and will wait you and your purse strings out if he feels that you are going to eventually be that cash cow. If a gigalo can marry a woman that he doesn't love and wait for over two years for a greencard...60 days without pay will not faze him really. The gig game is sooo much bigger than that. Now, this is not to say that the stories won't get more deseparate or outlandish...but just to say it is by far not the only way to avoid an opportunist.

The only red flags you need to heed are those that hit your gut...it makes you have bubble guts or want to vomit...ladies just start trusting your instinct and natural God given gift of women's intuition. It will never fail you unless you stifle it.

I agree with you 100% on this!!

[phillyfashionista 8]

Yes, you ladies are right. I may need to take a hard stance with him. If we run out of digicel minutes on this plan, I'm thinking we'll just have to go several days without speaking. Perhaps that will finally motivate him to get a chip like I've been requesting. He just doesn't get it that if he spends a little extra one time, it'll pay off later. Instead, he'll blow through several hundred in credits because he wants to call every day rather than forking over $1000 to get to talk much MUCH longer.

And I know he was surviving however he could before and that's why I refuse to be his 'western union mama' for any reason other than taking care of this visa business. I figure if he got by before me, he just has to get by now without my help. He doesn't ask and I don't offer. But sometimes when it comes to some of these other issues, we have a struggle. The one good thing he did this week on his own was get passport photos for this visa business he has to take care of next week. So, I am glad about that but I just wish he'd go get than damn chip and do MORE for his part!

I've known him since Nov 07....not long compared to some but I did take my time with all of this and really thought long and hard before undertaking this process. The one thing about having a mostly phone relationship is that you can't get distracted by the 'other' stuff and you have to focus on issues and your values and what matters to you both and how you'll resolve things.

Sorry Ells...but that is not necessarily true. The only distraction that is eliminated by a phone relationship is actual sexual intercourse. There is a lot of non-verbal communication that is missed with phone conversations. A lot can be discerned from non-verbal communication, and we don't have that luxury most times. Therefore, words without action are simply that...words. Buying a $100 credit from your last $150 is making an effort. However, buying $100 digicel credit to say "Babes call mi back nuh credit dun"...is by no means effort or equal contribution. He is simply saving much of the card balance for local calls later. I also know from my own cheap experiences trying to call my kids that $100 JA (ask me why I was determined not to buy higher denominations...LOL) will not get a long phone call back to the States. You may get 10-15 minutes using the entire credit. Lets call a spade a spade for real for real.

Unfortunately, you can "talk" until you are blue in the face about problem resolution, values and matters of priority but until you see those words in action...bank on the very real fact that you do not know your man. Every couple in an LDR or any marriage that didn't involve a period of "shacking" will have a period of adjustment and re-learning how to run their household...no matter what was discussed previously. If you don't believe this, then you are fooling yourself and in for a lot of disappointments initially.

Not directed at you Ells or any one person on this thread...just an observations that makes me sad

I find it sad and disheartening that some of the women on this thread find it necessary to list disclaimers against "potential red flags" (ie...I've known him xyz amount of time, I prayed and asked God about this relationship and if this was the best step for me...I NEVER send money to my man or his family, I only stay at his place in Jamaica or I've met his entire family and for the most part they love me...etc. etc.)

I would feel so much better if we could just stand behind the merit of our relationships period...without validating that we are well aware and avoiding the "normal" perceived pit falls of a Jamaican LDR. Every woman is blessed with intuition, and the only time we start giving disclaimers when discussing the relationship is when we feel something in our gut is off (my observations and opinion). If you feel something is off...it usually is. Now, if you decide to overlook, store it away for future use, pick your battles, or address the discomfort is entirely up to you and your partner. A good healthy and fulfilling relationship doesn't need a defense attorney...it will be reflected as such (even with normal relationship issues).

All this to say...nobody on this board or in your off board relationships can tell you what is real or fake in your relationship. Your intuition told you long before you typed the first disclaimer IMO. People are going to think what they want to think regardless.

If you were in a non-LDR relationship, would you immediately start a conversation with "Now I know I have only been with Jimmy for a little less than a year...but I have thought long and hard about this relationship and us going to the next level. I don't give him money/gifts and he never asks for anything either. We talk all the time about our values and goals and we really know each other pretty well now?"

Nope...you would just say "Girl...Jimmy asked me to move in with him the other day. I'm thinking about going for it...life is short so...hell...why not? I found this nice _____ (fill in the blank) for him too at xyz store...you think he will like it?"...and keep it moving. Am I right or wrong?

Damn this insomnia. LOL

WOW Jawi that was a mouth full ( Preach Sistah) My Momma always says you better follow your God given woman's intuition or you will regret it.

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

How to make your BUTT BIGGER.... (I know this is off topic, but I'm sitting hear in tears)

While some people want a smaller butt, some want one a little larger and more shapely, especially with the attention that the bountiful booties of celebrities like Jennifer Lopez, Beyonce Knowles, and Kim Kardashian have drawn.[1] In this wikiHow we'll explore what you can do to build a buxom bottom.

1. Build muscle. You can actually make your butt rounder and larger by altering the appearance of the muscles in it (Gluteus maximus, Gluteus medius, and Gluteus minimus).

* The ultimate butt expanding exercise is the full squat. It not only can dramatically increase the size of your butt, but it will also improve the shape of your legs, giving a more proportioned appearance. It must be done properly, though, or else you can injure your back: How to Do a Squat

* Do kick backs. This is a exercise move where you stand on one leg. The leg that is free off the ground, you kick it back until you see you butt squeeze into a bubble. Repeat 10 times and switch. To add resistance, use ankle weights or cables.

2. Adjust your weight. Whether you should gain weight or lose weight in order to make your butt bigger (relative to the rest of your body) depends on your natural body type, which is controlled by genetics. When you gain weight, where does the fat go first?

* If it tends to go to the butt and hip area, gaining a little weight will help fill things out. See How to Gain Weight.

* If fat goes to your arms, stomach, or back first, losing some weight will make your body more petite in relation to your butt, which makes your butt look bigger. Read How to Lose Weight. This is especially true if you carry extra weight on your waistline. Getting a smaller waist can make your butt look bigger, even if it didn't change a bit. See How to Lose Belly Fat.

3.

Choose the right clothing. Shop carefully and find clothes, especially jeans, that are cut in such a way to emphasize your buttocks. Usually they contain spandex in the blend so that the denim "hugs" your butt, supporting it and emphasizing its distinction from the thighs. The waistline should be snug, and as low as it can go without creating a muffin top or showing a plumber's crack. You can also purchase undergarments that "shape" your butt (but that won't help much if you wear baggy jeans over them).

4.

Stick your butt out. Arch your back, take a deep breath, and throw your shoulders back. This will not only make your butt more prominent, but it'll also slim your torso a bit and make your chest look bigger. In addition, sticking your butt out when you're walking is essential for good posture, strengthening your core muscles as they fully support your spine.[2]

To further emphasize your curves with a feminine swagger, follow the steps in How to Walk Like a Diva.

5. Wear high heels. If high heels are your thing, wearing them will make your butt perkier, and also encourage butt-emphasizing posture as described in the previous step. Try standing sideways in front of a mirror; get up on your tippy toes (or slip on high heels) and see how doing so makes your butt look rounder (as well as your legs more toned). The higher and skinnier the heel, the more pronounced the butt. Keep in mind, however, that wearing high heels all the time can be hazardous to your health[3] so don't get carried away.

*

This advice applies to men, as well. The first high heels were designed for horse riders, to help the shoes grip stirrups. To this day, cowboy boots sport heels (and many cowboys sport tighter jeans - coincidence?).

[justucia 0]

This advice applies to men, as well.

lmao

[mrsladyd 0]

Good morning yardie crew..........waving

Lawny.....now you got me in tears....watch out for that muffin top! Some women still don't know about it!!!!

[TRELAWNY PARISH 10]

I hope I didn't offend anyone, but this was too damn funny and I needed to laugh...mi a try get rid a fi mi big batty...