February 09 - VSC

[Maire 1]

But dont u need a computer to use Skype? From my understanding that is a computer program no? And like I said before there are no computers in the city where he lives..cus Cubans are not allowed to use Internet ...grrrAnyhow....GOOD MORNING!!!!!!!!TODAY IS GOING TO BE A ....GOOD DAY!

Can i ask u guys a question? at any point given did u guys think something was not right or that may be u were doing the wrong thing by spending so much money and wasting so much time for someone that might never appreciate it like u think they do?

I am asking this cus...I am starting to...I dont know if the waiting, stress or what it is..but I am not feeling it today..I am feeling like I am spending so much money..dont do a damn thing, dont go anywhere and who knows may be when he gets here things would change like all those horror stories I have read here in VJ forums.

This happened to me today(actually just now)..I called my mother-in-law who also lives here...and she tells me that my fiance went to another city(in Cuba) to take his "passport pictures" that we are going to need for the interview...(keep in mind we dont even have a NOA2 yet) so I tell her how come? I have not advise him to do so and he does not even know how many do we need....she stayed quiet....however, at the same time she doesnt know i have her e-mail account info(well she asked me once to create her an account and i kept the password)...I went into it and he had sent her an email saying he was going to another city to go to a bday party with a friend....after we spoke on the telephone she emailed him saying that when i call him tomorrow he needs to say that he went for the passport pictures...imagine how frustrated iam..why would she lie to me...I would not get mad for him going to a bday party....so then why telling me that he went to take pictures? I call him every wed night and tomorrow when I do it will be a big eye opener to me...I will find out if he would lie to me for something soo stupid...i hope i am not disappointed...

what do u guys think? I am soo frustrated right now

I'm a little confused. How did he send an email to his mother with no computer or restricted access to the Internet in Cuba?

In any regard, I hope you are feeling better or have more clarity today. This process is extremely taxing...and it really can wreck havoc on your pysche and relationship when you read the fart too frequent unfortunate turn of events on VJ. While I agree that it is disturbing that both of them lied to you, try not to go "looking" for things because of what you read here. If you are having doubts, let it be because of actual events happening between you two...and not all the warning or red flags from other people's relationship.

I hope this made some type of sense...I feel like I'm rambling. LOL

Well the only computer is a couple of hrs away,located at a hospital that ONLY doctors are allowed to use. However, he knows someone who works there and sometimes he calls this person and tells him what to write...(not a favor, he later has to pay this person with money or food or anything since this is very risky and the person can lose his job)So he ocassionally e-mails me, like 3-4 times a month thru this via.

I understand what you are saying..sometime the distance and stress can back fire...I am just a little stressed and dont know what to say tonight. It is not a big deal if he goes to a Bday party..I dont mind...its just the lies what kinda bother me

and what kills me is that I dont even know how to say it..cus i cant say i read her e-mails....and honestly I dont even know what I do it..on a daily basis..yes I admit I do it everyday....I guess I wanna know the truth..may be Iam getting doubts...funny thing is they grow as time passes...

Edited April 22, 2009 by Maire

[lizandpat 0]

Morning everyone!

Maire - I hope it all works out for you today!

thank u hunny!!

But of course my friend! We're all here for you!

But dont u need a computer to use Skype? From my understanding that is a computer program no? And like I said before there are no computers in the city where he lives..cus Cubans are not allowed to use Internet ...grrrAnyhow....GOOD MORNING!!!!!!!!TODAY IS GOING TO BE A ....GOOD DAY!

Can i ask u guys a question? at any point given did u guys think something was not right or that may be u were doing the wrong thing by spending so much money and wasting so much time for someone that might never appreciate it like u think they do?

I am asking this cus...I am starting to...I dont know if the waiting, stress or what it is..but I am not feeling it today..I am feeling like I am spending so much money..dont do a damn thing, dont go anywhere and who knows may be when he gets here things would change like all those horror stories I have read here in VJ forums.

This happened to me today(actually just now)..I called my mother-in-law who also lives here...and she tells me that my fiance went to another city(in Cuba) to take his "passport pictures" that we are going to need for the interview...(keep in mind we dont even have a NOA2 yet) so I tell her how come? I have not advise him to do so and he does not even know how many do we need....she stayed quiet....however, at the same time she doesnt know i have her e-mail account info(well she asked me once to create her an account and i kept the password)...I went into it and he had sent her an email saying he was going to another city to go to a bday party with a friend....after we spoke on the telephone she emailed him saying that when i call him tomorrow he needs to say that he went for the passport pictures...imagine how frustrated iam..why would she lie to me...I would not get mad for him going to a bday party....so then why telling me that he went to take pictures? I call him every wed night and tomorrow when I do it will be a big eye opener to me...I will find out if he would lie to me for something soo stupid...i hope i am not disappointed...

what do u guys think? I am soo frustrated right now

I'm a little confused. How did he send an email to his mother with no computer or restricted access to the Internet in Cuba?

In any regard, I hope you are feeling better or have more clarity today. This process is extremely taxing...and it really can wreck havoc on your pysche and relationship when you read the fart too frequent unfortunate turn of events on VJ. While I agree that it is disturbing that both of them lied to you, try not to go "looking" for things because of what you read here. If you are having doubts, let it be because of actual events happening between you two...and not all the warning or red flags from other people's relationship.

I hope this made some type of sense...I feel like I'm rambling. LOL

Well the only computer is a couple of hrs away,located at a hospital that ONLY doctors are allowed to use. However, he knows someone who works there and sometimes he calls this person and tells him what to write...(not a favor, he later has to pay this person with money or food or anything since this is very risky and the person can lose his job)So he ocassionally e-mails me, like 3-4 times a month thru this via.

I understand what you are saying..sometime the distance and stress can back fire...I am just a little stressed and dont know what to say tonight. It is not a big deal if he goes to a Bday party..I dont mind...its just the lies what kinda bother me

Maire - Maybe his mom is worried that you'll be upset and thought it was better to tell you something like the passport lie?? I don't know here, just pulling things out of the air...hehe

[Maire 1]

lol you are all so cute...my personal therapists!!!!!!we should do a 10 yr reunion!!!!!LMAO gosh iam so random sometimes

[jawi876 2]

Well the only computer is a couple of hrs away,located at a hospital that ONLY doctors are allowed to use. However, he knows someone who works there and sometimes he calls this person and tells him what to write...(not a favor, he later has to pay this person with money or food or anything since this is very risky and the person can lose his job)So he ocassionally e-mails me, like 3-4 times a month thru this via.

I understand what you are saying..sometime the distance and stress can back fire...I am just a little stressed and dont know what to say tonight. It is not a big deal if he goes to a Bday party..I dont mind...its just the lies what kinda bother me

and what kills me is that I dont even know how to say it..cus i cant say i read her e-mails....and honestly I dont even know what I do it..on a daily basis..yes I admit I do it everyday....I guess I wanna know the truth..may be Iam getting doubts...funny thing is they grow as time passes...

OOOhhhh okay. Understood. I have zero knowledge on Cuba...although my cousin married a Cuban refugee years ago when I was still in grade school. He never had a desire to speak English...so I didn't get to ask a lot of questions about the country. I would love to visit because from the pictures I have seen...it looks absolutely beautiful.

I don't tolerate lies well at all either. Tell me the truth and let me retain my right to make my own decisions. How did you feel about him clearing the air first without you probing for info? What prompted you to feel like there was something to read in your m-i-l's email box? I mean was it just a bad feeling that wouldn't go away?

[Maire 1]

Well the only computer is a couple of hrs away,located at a hospital that ONLY doctors are allowed to use. However, he knows someone who works there and sometimes he calls this person and tells him what to write...(not a favor, he later has to pay this person with money or food or anything since this is very risky and the person can lose his job)So he ocassionally e-mails me, like 3-4 times a month thru this via.

I understand what you are saying..sometime the distance and stress can back fire...I am just a little stressed and dont know what to say tonight. It is not a big deal if he goes to a Bday party..I dont mind...its just the lies what kinda bother me

and what kills me is that I dont even know how to say it..cus i cant say i read her e-mails....and honestly I dont even know what I do it..on a daily basis..yes I admit I do it everyday....I guess I wanna know the truth..may be Iam getting doubts...funny thing is they grow as time passes...

OOOhhhh okay. Understood. I have zero knowledge on Cuba...although my cousin married a Cuban refugee years ago when I was still in grade school. He never had a desire to speak English...so I didn't get to ask a lot of questions about the country. I would love to visit because from the pictures I have seen...it looks absolutely beautiful.

I don't tolerate lies well at all either. Tell me the truth and let me retain my right to make my own decisions. How did you feel about him clearing the air first without you probing for info? What prompted you to feel like there was something to read in your m-i-l's email box? I mean was it just a bad feeling that wouldn't go away?

I cant believe he had the odasity to lie to me just cus his mom told him to....I mean I was expecting him to be like :If I didnt do anything wrong why am I going to lie to my fiance?" u know...I dont care if she lies to me I am NOT going to sleep with her, what kills me is that he did...I dont even know what to do or how to go around the subject without making ti obvious i have checked her email....My mom usually tells me "dont look for things...cus if you do you will find what you are looking for"...but iam not like that I like to be aware..i dont like people using me....and by curiosity it has been part of my daily chores to check her email...he has never said anything bad..this is the first thing or lie...

[jawi876 2]

Well the only computer is a couple of hrs away,located at a hospital that ONLY doctors are allowed to use. However, he knows someone who works there and sometimes he calls this person and tells him what to write...(not a favor, he later has to pay this person with money or food or anything since this is very risky and the person can lose his job)So he ocassionally e-mails me, like 3-4 times a month thru this via.

I understand what you are saying..sometime the distance and stress can back fire...I am just a little stressed and dont know what to say tonight. It is not a big deal if he goes to a Bday party..I dont mind...its just the lies what kinda bother me

and what kills me is that I dont even know how to say it..cus i cant say i read her e-mails....and honestly I dont even know what I do it..on a daily basis..yes I admit I do it everyday....I guess I wanna know the truth..may be Iam getting doubts...funny thing is they grow as time passes...

OOOhhhh okay. Understood. I have zero knowledge on Cuba...although my cousin married a Cuban refugee years ago when I was still in grade school. He never had a desire to speak English...so I didn't get to ask a lot of questions about the country. I would love to visit because from the pictures I have seen...it looks absolutely beautiful.

I don't tolerate lies well at all either. Tell me the truth and let me retain my right to make my own decisions. How did you feel about him clearing the air first without you probing for info? What prompted you to feel like there was something to read in your m-i-l's email box? I mean was it just a bad feeling that wouldn't go away?

I cant believe he had the odasity to lie to me just cus his mom told him to....I mean I was expecting him to be like :If I didnt do anything wrong why am I going to lie to my fiance?" u know...I dont care if she lies to me I am NOT going to sleep with her, what kills me is that he did...I dont even know what to do or how to go around the subject without making ti obvious i have checked her email....My mom usually tells me "dont look for things...cus if you do you will find what you are looking for"...but iam not like that I like to be aware..i dont like people using me....and by curiosity it has been part of my daily chores to check her email...he has never said anything bad..this is the first thing or lie...

I agree with your mother...and had actually typed that and then erased it. Yes he lied...but he thought better of it and wanted to clear the air with you. However, some could say you are lying too...simple omission of facts does not negate the lie. You are snooping on his mother...and finally found something. Now that you found it, what do you do with it? How do you even bring it up without admitting what you have done wrong?

I think you should give up the snooping, and take some time to reflect on why you are having trust issues with him. This immigration process is truly trying and can have some scary outcomes...however there are many happily successful couples too. I wish you the best...PM me if you ever just need an unbiased ear. (((((((Marie)))))))

[lizandpat 0]

Hmm, I understand what your saying Maire......hopefully you can get him to talk to you tonight. And I mean REALLY talk to you!

[Maire 1]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

[jawi876 2]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

[lizandpat 0]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

My sentiments exactly, Jawi876!

btw, took a peek at your profile and noticed your bday....you are exactly 10 days older than me..lol!

[Maire 1]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

Excuse meeeeeeeeeeeee? I own the rights to that line....!!!!! lol

[lizandpat 0]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

Excuse meeeeeeeeeeeee? I own the rights to that line....!!!!! lol

Ok..WHY isn't it time to go home yet????

[Maire 1]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

Excuse meeeeeeeeeeeee? I own the rights to that line....!!!!! lol

Ok..WHY isn't it time to go home yet????

I knowwww!!!!!!!!!!! Imagine me!!!!iam dying to get home and call my fiance lol....

[Rich and Bey 1]

lets get to the middle of january at least.

[lizandpat 0]

Thank you guys for everything...but I dont wanna put this bad energy or burden on you!!!!!!!!! Who knows maybe today is a GOOD DAY FOR SOME OF YOU!!!!!Cus honestly speaking if i was to get my NOA2 today I dont think I would so be excited anymore lmao..sometimes i also tend to drown in a glass of water

I'm going to steal your saying...LMAO....

Everything will work out the way it is destined to work out. Chin up lady!

Excuse meeeeeeeeeeeee? I own the rights to that line....!!!!! lol

Ok..WHY isn't it time to go home yet????

I knowwww!!!!!!!!!!! Imagine me!!!!iam dying to get home and call my fiance lol....

I bet!!! Do you call right when you get home?