faithful advice needed

[Sandrila 1]

In all seriousness, exes and sometimes guy friends get a little nuts or overly protective when they find out US women are with a MENA man. If an ex was involved, maybe hes really the physco and wants to try to butt into things and make it seem as though it may not be. Dont just think about this one sided. You have no idea how exes can really be.

If you were the right kind of husband to your wife, then you would never hurt her in any way. Verbally, physically or emotionally. 2nd you would want to be her protector if she did have a physco ex, dont be the kind of jealous man as in OH MY GOSH they might get back together, but the loving protector as in Im here for my wife no matter how nuts the ex may be. Some exes really do hate to know the US wife is with a MENA man. Thats just how it is. Some exes no matter who the US wife is with will try to make a living hell for the lady. Think about all of that and check your own actions as a husband too.

very good Tamara

[tmma 467]

You asked for advice-here it is--

You are allowing your private life to become fodder for open discussion. Sort this out privatly, instead of wrecking vengence on your wife by public humiliation! Oh, and if the ex ticks you off so much, sort it out with him too! PRIVATELY.

[Hanna&Mohamed 0]

I would never talk bad about my husband I think he has done it the wrong way . There is 2 sides to our story and he wont say that he ever did anything wrong . I wont go in to detail about this . I will say one thing I diddnt post my pregnancy for awhile because when he found out he told me he would would leave me if I dont have a abortion and that I trapped him by this . I was shocked !!

I dont know if we will be able to save this marraige or if I want to right now after what he has done on vj. Yes the video did come on my phone I didnt see it .If I did I would have deleted it .I talked to my ex several times a day about the kids . also Mohamed talks to alot of women and texts them and I said nothing .

Please pray for us !!

Edited February 6, 2009 by mohamed and melinda

[livelong_prosper 0]

You asked for advice-here it is--

You are allowing your private life to become fodder for open discussion. Sort this out privatly, instead of wrecking vengence on your wife by public humiliation! Oh, and if the ex ticks you off so much, sort it out with him too! PRIVATELY.

[crazyinEgypt 0]

You're not the only man from MENA having issues with their US citizen wife. Just be the bigger person in this situation

[sara..... 371]

grrrrr l love both of u guys too much so im gonna say it like it is since it has came to the board normally i would not do this but here it is.......

'

brother.......you have not yet adjusted to life in the usa....u also are dealing with her ex husband that sounds to me like he would love to just make u go away and ur allowing this problem and the problem of adjusting to life in the usa to cloud ur mind on this issue Islam teaches us to forgive and forgive and forgive......there are reasons u fell in love with her, now tell me do u really feel she is capable of doing all this?

sister......ur husband needs to know that while he is away at work his home is secure as muslim wifes this means to keep his home free of other men and beings it is the x that seems to be creating the doubt u have to think to urself who does ur loyalty belong to ur current husband or ur x? and no it was not right for him to say the things he did about the baby.

with all that said mena men can be a pain in the butt when they feel they have been cheated in anyway and their culture is a lot different than ours.......that dont mean he is right it just means that they look at things differently than we do isnt that one of the reasons u fell in love with him?

now to both of u........the way i see it u have a lot that u need to work thru......your adjustment to the way life is in the usa, also the exhusband issue, feelings of mistrust and lets not forget that the x may have turned the kids of urs and his into is person little army of lets kill the step father.......

marraige takes work lots of work misunderstandings can break ANY marraige at least talk it out i dont see you being able to get him to a marraige counselor, but sitting here on the out side i can see a lot of things that made the begining of this problem i love you both and hope that u can at least work out the problems even if both agree to divorce for the sake of ur child

love

sara

[Jenn! 918]

I'm closing this topic. This couple needs to sort things out privately. Best of luck to both.