SAWASDEE 3 (2009 Thai thread restarted)

[daboyz 36]

They didn't seem to care about my phone logs, but that was when butterbean seemed to be running the show. Take lots of pictures!

[scandal 951]

Sawasdee!

I have not posted here in a while. I am back active, (at least once a week now), on this board as we are going through the I-751 process now. I've had to deal with a lot of strange issues throughtout this process such as assisting my wife in getting a prior marriage to a man in Singapore anulled and getting approval from Amphur for my step-daughter to accompany my wife, (then fiance), to the US.

I don't have time to read through all the posts here, but if I can be of assistance to anyone who's having similar problems, feel free to drop me a note.

TucsonBill

TucsonBill!

Welcome back to VJ. You and I went through the process(es) of K1 and AOS at about the same time. I think you were about a month ahead of me.

Yep, today I am also working on AAm's I751 for removal of conditions...fun stuff eh? I'll be sending it off at the end of this month.

If you ever get a chance, drop a line and let me know how you're life has been going for the past 2 years. I'd love to catch up on your VJ success story! As for AAm and I, we've moved out of the Detroit area and now live near DC. I took a new job, and its been a HUGE breath of fresh air out here, great move for both AAm and I. AAm has been working in the QC department of FedEx for almost a year now. She is absolutely loving this job as FedEx is the first American company she has worked for...quite and experience for her!

We've also started the I-130 for AAm's daughter (May). We expect that she'll be here around the end of the year or so. That is going very well. May is 14 now, and has really been studying English hard for the past 2 years that AAm has been in the USA. She's quite fluent now! Very impressive. It will be great to have her with us soon.

We just bought a house, and life is for us has turned out more wonderful that we ever could have expected! I hope your story is great as well!!!

Peace,

MarkNAAm

Hi Brother Mark

I've sort of drifted off of VJ lately... busy with real life things, as well as burned out a bit by the culture wars here....

Glad to read your great news !!! congrats on your impending ROC, and the new house. Oh -- and I love your new C4C sig

Last night Thanti and I were invited to a wedding reception here in the Chicago area, for another Thai/farang couple we've befriended here.

rsn (Ray+Kat) were there as well - they drove down from Madison. We sat with them, and it was very nice to meet a VJer in person - first I've ever met! They're a very lovely couple.

[HYENA 4]

I have been trying to compile my cell phone records, I have printed out my bills up to May, can only go that far, do you think they need years and years of cell phone data?

I have the incoming and outgoing text message records up to May and now am printing each bill I get toward the interview which shows times and messages sent/received.

no voice calls anyway cause I am deaf.

We rarely email each other, (she really doesnt email) and cause she is online everyday and we chat on MSN and use webcam once in a while, but my MSN does not archive chats. I am using windows live messenger unofficially on XP 64bit. I had to modify the program to get it working.

the only thing I am doing is taking desktop screenshots of our video calls.

So the following evidence I most likely will have is just

PHOTOS TOGETHER

MSN VIDEO CHAT SCREEN SHOTS

CELL PHONE BILLS that SHOW THE TEXT LOGS since May

SHE WILL HAVE MY PASSPORTS ON HAND

Will this be enough?

I see potential flagS

Most Thais the engagement IS the meeting with the family of the fiancee and a discussion of how it's all going to work out, your intentions, sin sod (if applicable), Thai ceremony (wedding or not, most will want a ceremony) but I can't imagine not meeting the family for something like a marriage?

Lacking pictures with family....emails...lacking emails...web chats (change your msn options to record and start emailing each other ASAP for the next packet of continuing evidence). Lacking that, phone records and support and visa stamps, boarding passes. If you're 125% poverty level, perhaps an MSN update would be affordable? You need evidence (mentioned on the official websites). Review what others do and review denials here. I flew back with a guy who had his wife of 10 years and 2 kids denied due to lack of evidence (that was Kojak also reviewing).

I can't imagine getting engaged to anyone without meeting their family; especially Thailand that would be a big red flag for me (if she's legit), for her family (am I legit or am I going to sell her) for the embassy (most cultures meet families of engaged couples) and in Thailand meeting family is part of the marriage process itself. My fiancee's pirated XP saved chats OK but we also sent lots of emails the moment we decided to get engaged since we knew it would be needed (if other evidence was weak)...if not find a new service..if you're communicating, show it!! Everything you do together...show it!

Meet her family! You're marrying into it; I'd think it would be a smart thing to do for any couple who wants things to work out in the long run (families have a lot of influence; it would be nice to meet the influence to see if you get along OK).

((just my thoughts).

[HYENA 4]

Just wanted to say hi.... We just got our NOA1 and we are really psyched for the long wait.....i mean journey ahead of us. Hope we can learn tonnes from everyone, so thanks to all in advance.

Joe/Nok

I didnt get my NOA1 yet, but I did see that my check was cashed on the 12th and a WAC number was on the back. (they scan checks now) so I can view online.

I am more psyched out about very few photos together and never met her family despite we have met a lot in Bangkok (her parents live in the provinces) That should be an ok excuse? no time to go to provinces?

Well when we get interview, I will book a trip back to see her that week and try to rush some new photos, maybe a few studio shots as well, and regular ones and print them out in time for

the interview plus have her take my passports and I-134 junk

my I-134 is already complete with tax returns back to 2006 and all W2s as well as employee letter, but have to put in the more recent pay checks around that time.

In my honest opinion, flying half way around the world to get engaged with the intent to spend your LIFE with someone's daughter and not bothering to meet her parents; the people who raised her....NOT taking the 15 dollars for a van ride (what it cost me to get to Roi Et-12 hours) or a hundred for a plane ticket to go see your new parents in law is very odd (that is if she's on speaking terms with them) or paying for them to come and meet you at the airport if time is an issue.... but the mention of an "excuse" to not go meet them..red flag.

.... How do you know she doesn't have a "husband" living there (most Thais in my Teerak's area don't bother getting marriage licenses so one would never know and the one's who have been scammed learn about this fellow living with the family awaiting his US visa bride to bring him to the US after). Yes it happened to a good friend of mine (Vietnam) 2yrs ago and he grew up there and still got scammed...How do I KNOW I'm not getting scammed? Who knows for sure but the embassy will be asking themselves reasonable questions like these.

How can they trust you if you've never met them? How do they know you won't sell her? What if you're a terrible alcoholic wife beater? Wouldn't her family like to meet you and you them? What if they're overly controlling and she's trying to keep that to a minimum when it's just you two...i'd want to know about that...how her family is, do you get along, their goals, your goals....etc.) How can you prove you've got a bonifide relationship and aren't just doing this for a business arrangement with only photos of you two together but no family, no engagement party, few emails and some websots that don't show content or duration (do you have support)? The embassy will ask themselves questions like these, as well. Play devil's advocate and document your evidence accordingly.

Hotel bills...anything. Pretend you work for the embassy and pretend you suspect a couple of a business arrangement visa scam. What would you require to prove they are legitimate knowing the Thai culture?

For me when i think this way, the family still sticks out like a sore thumb. I can't buy the "no time" to go meet them. You're carting their daughter to another country forever and they don't want to meet you? Bring them down to BKK...

I don't know.....

I'm sure there's something missing not posted so perhaps I'm assuming what isn't but you have it. When family is involved in Thailand, it's a matter of face and reputation and therefore higher likelihood of a bona fide relationship and therefore visa approval (IMHO). Not saying things still don't happen but when relatives are involved it becomes more real.

I hope it works out for you...best of luck!

Edited August 22, 2009 by HYENA

[louisthani 0]

Well another catch is Her Mom agrees, her Dad does not.

This also is a good way to avoid sinsot she agrees too. just get to do whatever she wants and come be with me by skipping sinsot and avoiding family.

She is 28 already though.

Well my current job does not allow me to go back like I use to. so I am stuck here in the US unless I wait for my new vacation week to accrue

but that would probably come around the time of her interview.

She would have to 100% quit her job sadly to get me a family visit. She works 7 days a week and on call always, cannot leave the city.

Well she may quit when the interview appointment is scheduled so she can get time to do medical and other things, but she wants to wait till then.

I know its bad that the embassy suggests you not do anything till you have a visa 100%. but her work is preventing her from being able to get a police report, medical, etc.

Calling in sick wont fly too well, she gets reprimanded for that.

And no she does not agree with me sending money to support her as if she has no job, the economy is so bad she wants to keep her job as long as she can till she is 100% certain.

[daboyz 36]

Just wanted to say hi.... We just got our NOA1 and we are really psyched for the long wait.....i mean journey ahead of us. Hope we can learn tonnes from everyone, so thanks to all in advance.

Joe/Nok

I didnt get my NOA1 yet, but I did see that my check was cashed on the 12th and a WAC number was on the back. (they scan checks now) so I can view online.

I am more psyched out about very few photos together and never met her family despite we have met a lot in Bangkok (her parents live in the provinces) That should be an ok excuse? no time to go to provinces?

Well when we get interview, I will book a trip back to see her that week and try to rush some new photos, maybe a few studio shots as well, and regular ones and print them out in time for

the interview plus have her take my passports and I-134 junk

my I-134 is already complete with tax returns back to 2006 and all W2s as well as employee letter, but have to put in the more recent pay checks around that time.

In my honest opinion, flying half way around the world to get engaged with the intent to spend your LIFE with someone's daughter and not bothering to meet her parents; the people who raised her....NOT taking the 15 dollars for a van ride (what it cost me to get to Roi Et-12 hours) or a hundred for a plane ticket to go see your new parents in law is very odd (that is if she's on speaking terms with them) or paying for them to come and meet you at the airport if time is an issue.... but the mention of an "excuse" to not go meet them..red flag.

.... How do you know she doesn't have a "husband" living there (most Thais in my Teerak's area don't bother getting marriage licenses so one would never know and the one's who have been scammed learn about this fellow living with the family awaiting his US visa bride to bring him to the US after). Yes it happened to a good friend of mine (Vietnam) 2yrs ago and he grew up there and still got scammed...How do I KNOW I'm not getting scammed? Who knows for sure but the embassy will be asking themselves reasonable questions like these.

How can they trust you if you've never met them? How do they know you won't sell her? What if you're a terrible alcoholic wife beater? Wouldn't her family like to meet you and you them? What if they're overly controlling and she's trying to keep that to a minimum when it's just you two...i'd want to know about that...how her family is, do you get along, their goals, your goals....etc.) How can you prove you've got a bonifide relationship and aren't just doing this for a business arrangement with only photos of you two together but no family, no engagement party, few emails and some websots that don't show content or duration (do you have support)? The embassy will ask themselves questions like these, as well. Play devil's advocate and document your evidence accordingly.

Hotel bills...anything. Pretend you work for the embassy and pretend you suspect a couple of a business arrangement visa scam. What would you require to prove they are legitimate knowing the Thai culture?

For me when i think this way, the family still sticks out like a sore thumb. I can't buy the "no time" to go meet them. You're carting their daughter to another country forever and they don't want to meet you? Bring them down to BKK...

I don't know.....

I'm sure there's something missing not posted so perhaps I'm assuming what isn't but you have it. When family is involved in Thailand, it's a matter of face and reputation and therefore higher likelihood of a bona fide relationship and therefore visa approval (IMHO). Not saying things still don't happen but when relatives are involved it becomes more real.

I hope it works out for you...best of luck!

I'm a terrible alcoholic wife beater. So is her father, I guess that's why everything was cool.

[louisthani 0]

Well generally speaking a disabled farang is a NO NO in the eyes of most conservative Thai families, of all my ex-gf or those whose parents I met in Thailand, never found any parents satisfied with me, it was a deal breaker for the girl in the past and she felt she had to go with her parents opinion after meeting. I have had other dramas where the Mother of the girl forced her to pay me back for a family trip I took with them after her Mom and I found out that her daughter had a Thai bf on the side. It was nice of her Mom feeling that her daughter treated me wrong.

I rarely had any experience with Thai fathers because almost all my ex-gf come from broken families, the Dad ran away in most cases

My ex-wife was a special case, the parents were so glad to get her off their hands (no sinsot or wedding). and I realized later that I opened up a pandoras box.

Yes this is all about Thailand

[BishopMnA 0]

Hi Brother Mark

I've sort of drifted off of VJ lately... busy with real life things, as well as burned out a bit by the culture wars here....

Glad to read your great news !!! congrats on your impending ROC, and the new house. Oh -- and I love your new C4C sig

Last night Thanti and I were invited to a wedding reception here in the Chicago area, for another Thai/farang couple we've befriended here.

rsn (Ray+Kat) were there as well - they drove down from Madison. We sat with them, and it was very nice to meet a VJer in person - first I've ever met! They're a very lovely couple.

Hello Brother Ron!

Personally, I would have been upset if I'd seen you on VJ as much as you used to be...because...well...obvious reasons <haha>

I'm so happy that you've made friends with a couple in the same boat as you guys...and met fellow VJers rsn&new bride. That is all fantastic! I could not be happier for all of you.

Drop me a PM sometime! Or cruz by C4C when you have a chance. Of course, you and Thanti are always welcome here (got a GREAT deal on a foreclosure + AAm is thrilled to be a homeowner, me too) anytime that you want to bring her to DC (I assume that will be your plans...someday).

Peace to you Brother Scandal! I'm sure Thanti is in great hands and enjoying her new life. I'm sure you're overjoyed as well.

God Bless!

MarkNAAm

[HYENA 4]

Well generally speaking a disabled farang is a NO NO in the eyes of most conservative Thai families, of all my ex-gf or those whose parents I met in Thailand, never found any parents satisfied with me, it was a deal breaker for the girl in the past and she felt she had to go with her parents opinion after meeting. I have had other dramas where the Mother of the girl forced her to pay me back for a family trip I took with them after her Mom and I found out that her daughter had a Thai bf on the side. It was nice of her Mom feeling that her daughter treated me wrong.

I rarely had any experience with Thai fathers because almost all my ex-gf come from broken families, the Dad ran away in most cases

My ex-wife was a special case, the parents were so glad to get her off their hands (no sinsot or wedding). and I realized later that I opened up a pandoras box.

Yes this is all about Thailand

Not having read other posts of yours, as I said, I may have been missing something...namingly experience. So you've been around the block a few times and got burned. Now I understand why you're reluctant to meet family! Having said that, I do know families who wouldn't bat an eye; and likely others here but it's too late since you found the one!

I really would look into updating msn or changing to yahoo or skype for the next packet.

I also need to tell you the embassies were updated and told not to flat out deny without proof or a high probability it's fraudulent. That doesn't mean they can't put your case in AP for never-neverland 'till Michael Jackson has time to review it...

My best suggestion is to play your own devil's advocate and pretend you're trying to be convinced this couple is legit and she's not scamming him and it's your duty to protect them. On the other hand, try to convince the other way (which is what we're all doing)....if any event between you two happens, pretend she's Paris Hilton and every paper, picture, receipt....anything is worth a million each just for the national enquirer.

Best of luck to ya! I really do hope it works out! So far my fiancee is doing OK. I asked when she wants to get married (legally) since it's gotta be while she's here for 3 months. She said "up to you but I'd like to lose a little weight first". She's in no rush and seems to be doing well...except on the learning new words and enunciation part....

I gotta find her a speak American English book (she had some british book that looked as dated as reading the King James Bible "shall not" and ####### like that.

..they're just looking for a good husband and a better life. I still would suggest meeting them anyway (maybe on neutral turf) so they can see you, look at your face and see you're a good guy?

[HYENA 4]

I messed up the last 2 lines of the previous post;

I meant to say there are good souls out there who are looking for a better life and maybe your sweetheat's family would be OK? What have they said so far?

Does she sign?

I'd still try to meet her family, though. I did all the sin sot stuff and out of pocket it wasn't that much since they slid it all back and I slid it back. Her family is awesome!

Hey! Got some "of age" girls in the family looking! Anyone have any relatives looking? Both adorable cuties (I'm trying to find eligible decent matches for them). They come from a good family. My plan is to send them to medical school...or however far they can go since no one in their family has gone beyond high school. Nursing school is a must for both of em (one way to help her family)....blah blah blah blah I'm rambling now!!!!!

[daboyz 36]

I messed up the last 2 lines of the previous post;

I meant to say there are good souls out there who are looking for a better life and maybe your sweetheat's family would be OK? What have they said so far?

Does she sign?

I'd still try to meet her family, though. I did all the sin sot stuff and out of pocket it wasn't that much since they slid it all back and I slid it back. Her family is awesome!

Hey! Got some "of age" girls in the family looking! Anyone have any relatives looking? Both adorable cuties (I'm trying to find eligible decent matches for them). They come from a good family. My plan is to send them to medical school...or however far they can go since no one in their family has gone beyond high school. Nursing school is a must for both of em (one way to help her family)....blah blah blah blah I'm rambling now!!!!!

I thought they would be a good match for me. Wife didnt think so. I have a big bruise on my arm now.

[rsn 135]

Sawasdee!

I have not posted here in a while. I am back active, (at least once a week now), on this board as we are going through the I-751 process now. I've had to deal with a lot of strange issues throughtout this process such as assisting my wife in getting a prior marriage to a man in Singapore anulled and getting approval from Amphur for my step-daughter to accompany my wife, (then fiance), to the US.

I don't have time to read through all the posts here, but if I can be of assistance to anyone who's having similar problems, feel free to drop me a note.

TucsonBill

TucsonBill!

Welcome back to VJ. You and I went through the process(es) of K1 and AOS at about the same time. I think you were about a month ahead of me.

Yep, today I am also working on AAm's I751 for removal of conditions...fun stuff eh? I'll be sending it off at the end of this month.

If you ever get a chance, drop a line and let me know how you're life has been going for the past 2 years. I'd love to catch up on your VJ success story! As for AAm and I, we've moved out of the Detroit area and now live near DC. I took a new job, and its been a HUGE breath of fresh air out here, great move for both AAm and I. AAm has been working in the QC department of FedEx for almost a year now. She is absolutely loving this job as FedEx is the first American company she has worked for...quite and experience for her!

We've also started the I-130 for AAm's daughter (May). We expect that she'll be here around the end of the year or so. That is going very well. May is 14 now, and has really been studying English hard for the past 2 years that AAm has been in the USA. She's quite fluent now! Very impressive. It will be great to have her with us soon.

We just bought a house, and life is for us has turned out more wonderful that we ever could have expected! I hope your story is great as well!!!

Peace,

MarkNAAm

Last night Thanti and I were invited to a wedding reception here in the Chicago area, for another Thai/farang couple we've befriended here.

rsn (Ray+Kat) were there as well - they drove down from Madison. We sat with them, and it was very nice to meet a VJer in person - first I've ever met! They're a very lovely couple.

I can say the same about you and Thanti. Kat and I enjoyed meeting you as well, and I just realized that you and Thanti were the first two people I have met in person from VJ as well!

Edited August 23, 2009 by rsn

[HYENA 4]

I messed up the last 2 lines of the previous post;

I meant to say there are good souls out there who are looking for a better life and maybe your sweetheat's family would be OK? What have they said so far?

Does she sign?

I'd still try to meet her family, though. I did all the sin sot stuff and out of pocket it wasn't that much since they slid it all back and I slid it back. Her family is awesome!

Hey! Got some "of age" girls in the family looking! Anyone have any relatives looking? Both adorable cuties (I'm trying to find eligible decent matches for them). They come from a good family. My plan is to send them to medical school...or however far they can go since no one in their family has gone beyond high school. Nursing school is a must for both of em (one way to help her family)....blah blah blah blah I'm rambling now!!!!!

I thought they would be a good match for me. Wife didnt think so. I have a big bruise on my arm now.

LOL u need to do more drinking and beating then...your FIL will be proud! LOL!

[HYENA 4]

Sawasdee!

I have not posted here in a while. I am back active, (at least once a week now), on this board as we are going through the I-751 process now. I've had to deal with a lot of strange issues throughtout this process such as assisting my wife in getting a prior marriage to a man in Singapore anulled and getting approval from Amphur for my step-daughter to accompany my wife, (then fiance), to the US.

I don't have time to read through all the posts here, but if I can be of assistance to anyone who's having similar problems, feel free to drop me a note.

TucsonBill

TucsonBill!

Welcome back to VJ. You and I went through the process(es) of K1 and AOS at about the same time. I think you were about a month ahead of me.

Yep, today I am also working on AAm's I751 for removal of conditions...fun stuff eh? I'll be sending it off at the end of this month.

If you ever get a chance, drop a line and let me know how you're life has been going for the past 2 years. I'd love to catch up on your VJ success story! As for AAm and I, we've moved out of the Detroit area and now live near DC. I took a new job, and its been a HUGE breath of fresh air out here, great move for both AAm and I. AAm has been working in the QC department of FedEx for almost a year now. She is absolutely loving this job as FedEx is the first American company she has worked for...quite and experience for her!

We've also started the I-130 for AAm's daughter (May). We expect that she'll be here around the end of the year or so. That is going very well. May is 14 now, and has really been studying English hard for the past 2 years that AAm has been in the USA. She's quite fluent now! Very impressive. It will be great to have her with us soon.

We just bought a house, and life is for us has turned out more wonderful that we ever could have expected! I hope your story is great as well!!!

Peace,

MarkNAAm

Last night Thanti and I were invited to a wedding reception here in the Chicago area, for another Thai/farang couple we've befriended here.

rsn (Ray+Kat) were there as well - they drove down from Madison. We sat with them, and it was very nice to meet a VJer in person - first I've ever met! They're a very lovely couple.

I can say the same about you and Thanti. Kat and I enjoyed meeting you as well, and I just realized that you and Thanti were the first two people I have met in person from VJ as well!

I think that's really nice being able to meet some Thai friends. My teerak has no Thai friends. She was told over and over not to make friends once she comes (she said even the TV had warnings?). anyway, she wants a Thai friend...had to go to a restaurant just so she could speak Thai.

I do need her to really concentrate on speaking English and reading it though (if she ever wants to get naturalized). She's got the books but seems busy doing everything but hitting them. I told her those books are the key to her driving, working, car, independence, money....oh well, I'm not pushing her; at her own pace....I know it's not an easy transition so I'm giving her all the time and space and support she needs....and searching for a friend for her.

Edited August 23, 2009 by HYENA

[rsn 135]

I think that's really nice being able to meet some Thai friends. My teerak has no Thai friends. She was told over and over not to make friends once she comes (she said even the TV had warnings?). anyway, she wants a Thai friend...had to go to a restaurant just so she could speak Thai.

I just asked my wife about this. What specifically was she told and what did she see on TV? Kat couldn't recall hearing or seeing anything like this. I'm curious.