Islamic marrage in Morocco

[brnidokiegurl 0]

with this quickness some are lucky some are not, some work some dont. I can see careing for someone (thru chat etc) but completely saying im going to marry without knowing in person little scary, go maybe do the engagement then go from there wether he comes here to marry or go back and marry there, i guarantee that will take some time you will always get good but varied advice here as each couple is different in the outcome of their cases

[nunyab 0]

good and varied advice is true... it is your life in the end and whatever you decide you live with good and bad so ask for advice listen but as you know it's between you and your fiance'

Yes i am glad they said no to hotels it is not suitable for a intended bride to be alone in a hotel, just not a good first impression. Staying with family very good but how will that look like with him??? I don't need to know the sleeping arrangments but wanted you to think about it. This is an Islamic country an Islamic man and there are very certain "rules" that should be applied.

If you're interested in more you're welcome to pm me...

[morocco4ever 63]

*sigh* Do you really think you could get to know him well enough in person from ONE MEETING to marry him? Internet and phone chats are not necessarily a good guide as to how it will be once you are married.

I know you didn't ask, but I had to say something in regards to what Staashi said. I just don't understand women who do such a thing. Oh well, have fun traveling around Morocco.

I did it and next month will celebrate my 4th wedding anniversary Marriage is rarely a bed of roses or a walk in the park all the time no matter how well you think you know your prospective spouse.

Having said that I also have to agree that even though I have been there done that it still seems pretty crazy when I see/hear someone else doing it

We did it as well, and tomorrow is our 4th anniversary, so it can work. I can say that by talking to my husband almost everyday for almost a year I knew him very well. And I can also say that he was exactly in person as he was online. BUT this might not hold true for everyone.

I do think it is wise to go first for and engagement party, the return for the marriage. Two reasons. First you get to know each other, second the consulate likes to see multiple visits.

As far as the Islamic marriage, well there are different opinions here about that. This was not an option for me and my husband. I had heard about it, and brought it up to him as an alternative to the marriage. He was dead set against it. He told me that he would never marry me in that manner because he viewed it as a disrespect. Additionally I know of many Muslim men that live by me. They do this islamic marriage with women to make them think that they are in love with the woman so that they will buy them things. One entrusted me by telling me that it really is nothing more than an agreement with God to have sex with a friend, without the permanent commitment. There is a length of time for the marriage. Awhile back there were people in Egypt that they were not allowing the marriage, so they did this type and filed for the fiance visa.

Keep in mind, I am repeating what I have been told. If that is what you decide then it is up to you. But as for me, since it was such an issue with my husband, I am glad that he wanted to marry legally from the start. It really is a personal decision.

[AlHayatZween 2]

Salaam Swanaskas,

Welcome to VJ MENA, and it must be so exciting planning for your upcoming trip.

Just some thoughts: i think it would be great if you could spend time with your habib's family. Would be great to get to know them, and learn about Maghrebi culture, and all that good stuff, especially since you are considering becoming part of that family and culture. Probably the more time staying with family the better...

As for hotels, just keep in mind that it is oftentimes difficult to even stay in the same hotel--nevermind the same room-- as your habib if you are not legally married, without a legal marriage certificate. It can be done !! But be prepared for headaches and paying bribes.

You can have an Islamic wedding ceremony with friends and family, but it will not be considered legal until you take the necessary steps with the Moroccan courts and police, and provide them with the necessary documents, a list of which is on the US Consulate Casablanca website.

i agree with some of the other posts above, that even though you'll be spending 6 weeks in Morocco, it might look suspicious to the US consulate if you get married the first time meeting. i don't mean to sound like a pessimist, and of course, we all know that you love your habib, but the consulate in Casa is notoriously stringent and inconsistent when approving visa petitions.

i noticed you said you were waiting till July to see your fiance? Would it be possible to go visit him in Dubai for a week or so? First, you'd get to meet your sweetheart face-to-face!

Second, when you go to Morocco, that would make your second time with him, and then you could probably get married.

And Thirdly, you'd get to see Dubai!!!

(Okay, maybe i'm projecting my own wishes with the third one )

Good luck and enjoy!

hz

[morocco4ever 63]

i noticed you said you were waiting till July to see your fiance? Would it be possible to go visit him in Dubai for a week or so? First, you'd get to meet your sweetheart face-to-face!

Second, when you go to Morocco, that would make your second time with him, and then you could probably get married.

And Thirdly, you'd get to see Dubai!!!

(Okay, maybe i'm projecting my own wishes with the third one )

Good luck and enjoy!

hz[/font][/color]

I couldn't agree more, but maybe more than a week. If you were to go meet him in Dubai, then do the marriage in July you would be ahead of the game.

[star_dragon 0]

I'm confused!

She posted today that she decided to go to Morocco and have an engagement party, not get married...But the replies are cautioning her about her rushing into a wedding. Maybe I'm missing something. Could be I didnt' read her reply correctly.

At any rate, whenever I go to Morocco (I've been 3 times), we have the option of staying with the family, but we don't. We rent a flat. It's cheaper than a hotel, fully furnished, and noone to answer to...

[morocco4ever 63]

I'm confused!

She posted today that she decided to go to Morocco and have an engagement party, not get married...But the replies are cautioning her about her rushing into a wedding. Maybe I'm missing something. Could be I didnt' read her reply correctly.

Yeah, we are all just planning her life out for her.

[sereia 0]

I'm confused!

She posted today that she decided to go to Morocco and have an engagement party, not get married...But the replies are cautioning her about her rushing into a wedding. Maybe I'm missing something. Could be I didnt' read her reply correctly.

I noticed she mentioned engagement party...but one time, two times? Both still seem a little much to me but oh well! But apparently there are those who work out great from meeting once or twice. I'd like to see how many DON'T work out. I bet you that number is much, much higher. But I guess no one here wants to acknowledge that fact.

I would go visit him in Dubai as well! Is that an option for you?

I would recommend staying with your in laws. Its definitely a more intimate way of getting to know them! I always did when I was visiting, never a hotel or flat. I had the big bedroom and my husband had the floor in the salon!

Either way good luck and I hope it works out wonderfully!

[star_dragon 0]

I'm confused!

She posted today that she decided to go to Morocco and have an engagement party, not get married...But the replies are cautioning her about her rushing into a wedding. Maybe I'm missing something. Could be I didnt' read her reply correctly.

Yeah, we are all just planning her life out for her.

Oh, that's fine...I just wasn't sure if my ADD was kicking in (breezing over posts and misreading them.....happens a lot)

I would recommend staying with your in laws. Its definitely a more intimate way of getting to know them! I always did when I was visiting, never a hotel or flat. I had the big bedroom and my husband had the floor in the salon!

Either way good luck and I hope it works out wonderfully!

I still visited the family everyday and spent time with them. I was there and had dinners and meals with them. We just didn't sleep there at night.

[morocco4ever 63]

I noticed she mentioned engagement party...but one time, two times? Both still seem a little much to me but oh well! But apparently there are those who work out great from meeting once or twice. I'd like to see how many DON'T work out. I bet you that number is much, much higher. But I guess no one here wants to acknowledge that fact.

Yes there are 2 that have worked out that have responded. But I did recommend getting to know each other since I agree that it is risky. Not just for the time to get acquainted, but to appease the consulate. Sara mentioned as well that it does sound crazy. It may have worked for us, but lets face it, you are better off spending as much time as possible together before making the commitment.

On the other hand, the culture we married into seems to believe that you get married first, then get to know each other. Weird isn't it.

[sereia 0]

More and more these days in Morocco they are dating more Western style. For an example, my SIL has been engaged for over a year! And she "dated" him for quite some time also. And she chose him herself, not arranged what so ever.

[star_dragon 0]

I noticed she mentioned engagement party...but one time, two times? Both still seem a little much to me but oh well! But apparently there are those who work out great from meeting once or twice. I'd like to see how many DON'T work out. I bet you that number is much, much higher. But I guess no one here wants to acknowledge that fact.

Yes there are 2 that have worked out that have responded. But I did recommend getting to know each other since I agree that it is risky. Not just for the time to get acquainted, but to appease the consulate. Sara mentioned as well that it does sound crazy. It may have worked for us, but lets face it, you are better off spending as much time as possible together before making the commitment.

On the other hand, the culture we married into seems to believe that you get married first, then get to know each other. Weird isn't it.

Ain't that the truth..

It's interesting..at a book discussion I led once at work, we read The Namesake and talked about this very thing. We were talking about arranged marriages versus choice marriages and it was interesting that based on characters in the book, and based on people's experiences that they shared at the discussion, that the arranged marriages seems turn have a better success rate than the others. Not that we're talking about arranged marriages here, and this is not scientific evidence at all...but it was still an interesting thought to the contributing factors....

[sereia 0]

LOVED that movie. Saw it last week. Gotta get the book...

[star_dragon 0]

LOVED that movie. Saw it last week. Gotta get the book...

You should! Book is AWESOME!

[sereia 0]

LOVED that movie. Saw it last week. Gotta get the book...

You should! Book is AWESOME!

I was just browsing channels one night and saw Indian arranged marriage blahblahblah and I hit "record"! LOL