Well

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

I got teary reading this post... I feel so nervous about my impending move, of course excited to be with Glen and get married but so nervous... I am incredibly close with my family here, we see eachother at least 1-2 times per week for dinner or just a tea... and my friends I love them with all my heart! It's going to be hard and I am worried about the homesickness I will be feeling... I am moving in November and my Mom is coming to Philly for Christmas so at least that is something to look forward too... LAURA stay strong!!

I love that we are all sharing our stories...it really helps. I'm feeling better, had a good cry. My parents called, they got home safe and I'm glad for that. Thank you Shawna, Sapphire and Mephys, you guys rock.

Jill...

I remember reading threads like this one too before my move and I was scared. Please don't get me wrong....I love being here with Nick, just as you will love moving to be with Glen. It just really makes you realize how important family and friends are. It's a very bittersweet journey.

I hope that you have a fantastic move and I hope that your visit for Christmas is great....I hope you stay strong as well...we are all here for you and each other!!!

Edited September 22, 2008 by ~Laura and Nick~

[thetreble 19]

Laura, my dear,

This is not the easiest transition. You have just moved from little brantford, ontario, home of THE GREAT ONE, to the most densly populated area in the whole united states.

For some, home sickness comes adn then goes for good. For some, it lasts a long time and for others it doesn't. I've lived here for almost two years and although my home sick has lessened, I still get disgusting boughts of it where I am convinced I might have made tehw rong choice.

The positive thing to note is that I always come back off of that cloud and see reality. Life moves on. Things are constantly changing. You have to move towards a point where you are truly happy in your new surroundings. I know that for me, specifically, once I move to somewhere here in NJ or PA that I'm totally comfortable living then I will improve 100% on my feelings towards living here. If I'm going to sit in traffic for hours each day, then when I get home and on the weekends, I want PEACE. So now I know what I need to do to move towards my goal of living somewhere quaint and that doesn't induce stress. I moved here to be with my love, not to gets ulcers and stress headaches.

Things will fall into place. Maybe your homesickness will never truly go away. Who the hell knows! Do know though, that it gets easier with time. You just broke off your relationship with your country and you may feel like she's mad with you. She is not. You guys have just decided to take time apart But she still loves you and will always be there for you.

[Krikit 1,163]

So sorry you're having a bout of homesickness, Laura. Hugs to you and everyone else who are going through this. I'm also sorry I don't have a lot to give you at the moment.... I'm kind of struggling with my own stuff right now. (Not homesickness related.)

Please know that it comes and goes, and gets easier to bear with time. Hang in there.

[Marilyn. 340]

I am still homesick and I have been here for over 3 years...

there have been a few times where I have really needed my mom and she was too far away to really be there for me....

I love being here with my hubby and I wouldn't give that up for anything but I really wish I hadn't had to give up my family to be with him

[Autumnchik 6]

Laura, Although I am the USC, I have been suffering bouts of homesickness since I moved from Georgia to New Hampshire 2 years ago (funny, since GA was not even my real home). I miss my friends, restaurants, my old job, lots of things. What I try to do to get through it is remind myself that life is a journey and it unfolds a little each day, that everything happens for a reason and I am meant to be here now. Perhaps in a few months, I will be meant to be somewhere else.

Of course, I also call my friends in GA all the time and do everything I can to keep in touch.

Much love to ya girl!

[britty 1]

I'm very lucky to have my entire family here with me at the moment (mum, dad and brother). the only thing is I feel down when I think of my parents going home Saturday and my brother the following Saturday. Im gonna make sure tomorrow morning that I enjoy the rest of the their visit, and I am going back to London for Christmas now with hubby (his idea and he's buying the tickets - angel). I am always heartbroken for the first few days when my family go home but I have done this twice before so I can get through it again. I think this is a great thread - lots of good advice for keeping our chins up and our hearts in one piece !!

[BH45 0]

Laura, my dear,

This is not the easiest transition. You have just moved from little brantford, ontario, home of THE GREAT ONE, to the most densly populated area in the whole united states.

For some, home sickness comes adn then goes for good. For some, it lasts a long time and for others it doesn't. I've lived here for almost two years and although my home sick has lessened, I still get disgusting boughts of it where I am convinced I might have made tehw rong choice.

The positive thing to note is that I always come back off of that cloud and see reality. Life moves on. Things are constantly changing. You have to move towards a point where you are truly happy in your new surroundings. I know that for me, specifically, once I move to somewhere here in NJ or PA that I'm totally comfortable living then I will improve 100% on my feelings towards living here. If I'm going to sit in traffic for hours each day, then when I get home and on the weekends, I want PEACE. So now I know what I need to do to move towards my goal of living somewhere quaint and that doesn't induce stress. I moved here to be with my love, not to gets ulcers and stress headaches.

Things will fall into place. Maybe your homesickness will never truly go away. Who the hell knows! Do know though, that it gets easier with time. You just broke off your relationship with your country and you may feel like she's mad with you. She is not. You guys have just decided to take time apart But she still loves you and will always be there for you.

Well said Treble....thank you.

[Cassie 8]

I came across this thread and I had to smile wryly.

I have been here just short of 4 years and this weekend I finally let go of what I call "my past life in Canada". And I think this is the first time I have truly felt settled here. Now don't get me wrong, there are days when I just want to be walking on Risser's Beach and then come home to my mom's blueberry muffins. But I have come to realize that the longer I hold onto the past, the longer I hold on to what I used to do and what I used to accomplish in my career and where I used to go, the longer it takes to focus on the here and now and the future with my precious husband. Trust me, I didn't get to this place overnight, but I am glad to finally get here. Don't get me wrong, this girl is a proud Canuck through and through, and that will never change, but I'm no longer counting what I have "lost" or all that I have given up or what is different.

And thetreble summed it up pretty well methinks:

Things will fall into place. Maybe your homesickness will never truly go away. Who the hell knows! Do know though, that it gets easier with time. You just broke off your relationship with your country and you may feel like she's mad with you. She is not. You guys have just decided to take time apart smile.gif But she still loves you and will always be there for you.

[Texanadian 10]

Why isn't my grass as green as it is on that other side?

I don't think there is a single person who doesn't miss home at least once in awhile. Sometimes it's a gentle reminder. Sometimes it really kicks in hard. If airline tickets weren't so expensive ($600-700) I would probably go back and visit more often. Even though I get airline miles for everything, it's still hard to try and find the right time to go visit back in Canada.

I've been here for 13 months now. During that time, I managed to go back and visit once (March 2008 for 2 weeks). When I got back, I was surprised at how different things felt. I thought it would be like I'd never left. The first 3 days or so took some getting used to again. By the time 2 weeks were over, it was like I'd never left. I was soooo not ready to get back to the US.

However, once I got back down south, it felt like home. Not my new home. But home. I didn't stray too far from where we live in Houston due to my getting lost while driving (that gets annoying). But after about 4 months or so, I noticed I would start driving home and not paying attention to where I was. Not watching the street signs. Taking other ways home to avoid the traffic. You subconsciously start to drive home without thinking about where you're going. That was one of the things that really made me say to myself "yep, this is where I live." I initially thought it would only take about 2 weeks, but it took longer in that regard. It's also nice getting on and off freeways and not accidentally going in the wrong direction.

At least you're closer being in New Jersey. Part of me wanted to drive across the country as I did in 2007. I had the time of my life on the open road (WA, ID, MT, WY, CO, NM, TX) wide open highways forever. Each state different in it's views and the way you felt. Colorado for example felt like I'd just crossed into British Columbia. Montana was a driver's dream......But the trouble with doing this now (aside from higher gas prices...I paid $2.95 for premium in 2007) is that you have to make the drive both ways. 2.5 days to cover 4300 kms is one thing. But to turn around after a week of visiting and doing it again is crazy. Flying doesn't seem so long after having done the big drive.

Just remember it's not forever. You are allowed to go back. And you will. My parents have come down to visit. Both sets. And both times there was a strange feeling after dropping them off at the airport. That empty house feeling upon returning home. My Dad said he used to get the same feeling when either myself or my stepsister would go visit him.

[thetreble 19]

I think some of us struggle with the idea of "home". We are not sure how it is supposed to feel and what it is supposed to look like. All we know is what home was when we were kids, and that is how we make comparisons between that and what we are trying to call home now.

In my eyes, Canada will always be my home. Maybe one day my husband and I will have enough cash to buy a cottage somewhere up in the muskokas. Maybe by the time I am 45 I will have an entirely different outlook on this WHOLE thing. We just never know.

All I know is that you usually can find things you love almost anywhere in North America. I love Victorian homes, little downtowns, beautiful winters, fire burning stoves, lakes, openness, etc. That exists in this state, just not where I live right now. I think if I can achieve and obtain some of life's pleasures that I had in Canada, I can find a happy medium between the old and new.

The idea of home though is always a struggle.

[Emancipation 2]

Awe... gal.. hang in there.. *sigh.. i wrote this on my blog the last time after coming home from PEI for Labour Day weekend:

The weekend felt relaxed and calm not as crazy as I thought and somehow in between the music and the conversation my heart told me I was no longer "at home" there. Sure, the beach is the place I love the most in the whole world, sharing laughs with my sister in law and brother so much fun, the comfortable way that we ease into life at Mum's, the instant connection of very dear friends, my nephew & niece wanting to show us the "latest" amazing thing they can do, and the familiar history we all share is a beautiful gift I wouldn't trade for anything. But, I have found a home here in this place, among friends who love building new memories with us, a faith community that has embraced us and welcomed our contribution, and a city that feels comfortable and even welcoming to us now. I was so blessed to grow up where I did, to have spent so much time in a place that I love so much, and to have been surrounded by so many who truly loved me. Not just on my good days but on my whiny and disgusting days too. But like a page turning chapter, it is hard to leave behind such a beautiful story, but there is loads left to read. I know that I miss daily the "everyday" moments- playing games, sneaking away for coffee & fire by the beach, playing music together with so many loved ones, but I see their lives changing, see their passions deepening around them without my daily presence, and it's comforting. Comforting that as their lives change and regroup so has mine, and that we all embrace the new "reality" and fondly remember what was. I'm sentimental tonite I suppose, and long for the next visit, don't get me wrong. I am truly blessed to live so close to my "hometown". But I realize with each visit that I am where I am supposed to be, and that my life in Canada for right now is on hold, or is being lived by others whom I dearly love. I do hope someday to be able to return, but it is not now. For right now I am where I need to be.

[Mephys 2]

Those are nice words E

I have felt homesick a bunch of times, but little by little I am letting go my "old" life...stuff that I moved with me that is completely useless or that I don't want to keep anymore. I let go a little bit of my old self everytime, but it feels better at the same time to "renew' myself.

I wish I could go back sometimes, but with the kids here I know it's not possible, maybe not for the next 20 years, and who know where I am going to be then....probably with my own kids and here is gonne be their home, so will I ever move back ? Not sure. It;s scary sometimes to think that far, so I take it day by day But I belong where my love is, here

[thetreble 19]

But I realize with each visit that I am where I am supposed to be, and that my life in Canada for right now is on hold, or is being lived by others whom I dearly love. I do hope someday to be able to return, but it is not now. For right now I am where I need to be.

Rightly said, E. Rightly said.

[Marilyn. 340]

I don't really miss Canada, I miss my family.... if they could move here I would be perfectly happy...

[~Laura and Nick~ 5]

Wow...

All of these powerful words coming from very strong and loving people...I am so thankful.

I agree with so many points being made here. Who knows where I'll be in 5 years, who knows if I'll even want to go back to Canada then...we may have a home and careers we love. I do know that I'm suppose to be here with Nick now in my life, that it feels so right with him and he is home to me.

I'm feeling better this morning. I woke up in my bed with my kitty and my husband by my side and I felt good.