Wedding finally

[sandozwalker 0]

Well, its almost wedding time! I can't believe it. As the weeks start to turn into days until then, I'm starting to freak out. Not even over the wedding. Just, the change from singleness to marriage. Its a HUGE step. Its one I've felt that I've been waiting and waiting for. But now its coming. I am absolutely excited. Its been nice to go over an entire month NOT worrying about immigration, and just worrying about us!

However, now as the wedding draws nearer, I realize how very little I know about the ENTIRE AOS process. I don't even know where to start! I mean, I know that we are waiting probably a little while to file the AOS because we want to save up for it a bit. He's already got his employment authorization by some miracle, so we're not quite as stressed about that. I really would like to use my lawyer for the AOS, but at the same time I want to save the money on it. I literally don't have a clue as to the next step. So, that is a bit of a worry in my brain.

But, if all goes well, we should be married by about 7pm on May 24, 2008. His mother by another miracle decided she was coming (very bitter woman not wanting to see her ex-husband). HOWEVER, then at the last minute she's decided she's NOT coming. NOW, she's decided she's coming DOWN to the coast, but won't go to the wedding. Its ridiculous. However, its probably better this way because she absolutely would make a scene, and that is the last thing we need.

I have an amazing wedding planner who is doing EVERYTHING (cake, ring bearer pillows, flower girl baskets, wedding favors, catering, wedding flowers, centrepieces, ect ect)..She is a professional wedding planner, but since I'm like a daughter to her, she isn't charging me anything. So, we're getting a $20,000 wedding for about $3,000. I'm very blessed. I'm BORED because she wont let me do anything at all. I don't even feel like I'm getting married in 2 weeks.

Anyhoo, I just thought I'd update. We're so excited.

[mRs StOcKwElL 1]

Well, its almost wedding time! I can't believe it. As the weeks start to turn into days until then, I'm starting to freak out. Not even over the wedding. Just, the change from singleness to marriage. Its a HUGE step. Its one I've felt that I've been waiting and waiting for. But now its coming. I am absolutely excited. Its been nice to go over an entire month NOT worrying about immigration, and just worrying about us!

However, now as the wedding draws nearer, I realize how very little I know about the ENTIRE AOS process. I don't even know where to start! I mean, I know that we are waiting probably a little while to file the AOS because we want to save up for it a bit. He's already got his employment authorization by some miracle, so we're not quite as stressed about that. I really would like to use my lawyer for the AOS, but at the same time I want to save the money on it. I literally don't have a clue as to the next step. So, that is a bit of a worry in my brain.

But, if all goes well, we should be married by about 7pm on May 24, 2008. His mother by another miracle decided she was coming (very bitter woman not wanting to see her ex-husband). HOWEVER, then at the last minute she's decided she's NOT coming. NOW, she's decided she's coming DOWN to the coast, but won't go to the wedding. Its ridiculous. However, its probably better this way because she absolutely would make a scene, and that is the last thing we need.

I have an amazing wedding planner who is doing EVERYTHING (cake, ring bearer pillows, flower girl baskets, wedding favors, catering, wedding flowers, centrepieces, ect ect)..She is a professional wedding planner, but since I'm like a daughter to her, she isn't charging me anything. So, we're getting a $20,000 wedding for about $3,000. I'm very blessed. I'm BORED because she wont let me do anything at all. I don't even feel like I'm getting married in 2 weeks.

Anyhoo, I just thought I'd update. We're so excited.

Edited May 10, 2008 by Rodge & Ninfa

[Kathryn41 3,205]

Wow - you sound like you will have a wonderful wedding! Some advice for the day? Don't worry - even if something goes wrong or isn't exactly as it was planned to be - the important part is saying your vows to each other - the rest is icing on a beautiful cake - so just try to relax and enjoy your day:-).

Married life is different than single and recognizing that it will be different is a good place to start. People talk about a marriage being 50-50. I would like to offer a bit of a different perspective . . . it may turn out to be 50-50 in the end, but it isn't during the process. There will be some days when your spouse is going to 'need' more than you do, so you 'give' more. There will be days when you 'need' more than your spouse, so he 'gives' more. If both of you try to give 75% then you are always going to have a good 'overlap' that will hold you over the times when you only have 25% or less to give due to other things happening. Give your partner the benefit of the doubt as well. If something happens to upset you or annoy you, don't assume he is aware of it or that it was deliberate or meant to be selfish or uncaring. Together you will be negotiating the way you share your space and your life together as husband and wife. It will be the little things that will often cause the most friction, but learn to 'discuss' them and save your big energy for really important issues and not the small stuff (like picking up his socks and leaving them on the living room floor, etc.). Okay - enough of that - just remember that the first 1 - 2 years will be the years of biggest adjustment and the time of most emotional and physical upheaval as you literally create your new life together. After a while you will find your stride as a couple and that is when the real joy in a marriage begins. Remember that each of you are still your own person - a marriage doesn't make you one - it makes you two people sharing a journey through life. Enjoy the sharing and enjoy the differences that you will encounter along the way. They keep life interesting.

ok - the AOS process . . . you mentioned your husband already has his EAD. That will expire when his I-94 expires and cannot be extended. When you apply for the AOS you also apply for an EAD and AP. The EAD he has now is based on his K-1 status - which is why it cannot be extended because his status has changed. The new EAD is based upon the AOS and is valid for a full year and is renewable until you get a decision on the AOS. The EAD generally takes about 90 days to process so your husband may well find that he will be unable to work between the time the I-94 expires and he receives the new EAD. That is why you will want to file the AOS as soon as possible. Marriage doesn't make him eligible to stay and work in the US beyond those first 90 days - the AOS does that.

Why not download the AOS form and instructions now and read them over? Take a look at the type of evidence they suggest and start gathering that together. You will end up blessing your wedding planner for not letting you help because it will free up some of your time to take care of the AOS and immigration paperwork. You really don't need a lawyer for this . . . you can definitely save some money there.

Again, congratulations and enjoy!

Edited May 10, 2008 by Kathryn41

[T.O_2_FL 0]

Congratulations....soon!

I found that the wedding date came up real soon! Sooner than we thought!

We too used a wedding planner but I told them that I wanted to be involved some what since it was our wedding and I wanted to feel like I was involved and not too removed from the 'wedding experience'. But then again that would probably explain why I got a few white hairs after it all! he he he

Just enjoy the day that's about to come and for us, we feel really elated that we are married now. We feel a deeper level of commitment and also a deeper respect for one another since this will be a life time that we will be sharing. There will always be compromises along the way and 50/50 is just the beginning. There will be 60/40 days and many other mixes.

Take lots of pictures!

Oh yea and it doesn't hurt to read up on the AOS and start getting that prepared if you're bored.