Crazy question for the MENA people

[kitty loves moudi 0]

If I had to go to Lebanon, I wouldn't mind it at all. Other than the hot humid weather, places with no A/C ohh and now the recent fighting Well I guess this is whee my biggest fear would come.

My husband did not try to make me wear anything, he was pleased with my choices and even helped me with shopping for clothes, gifts, our supermarket trips, etc..

He'd sit and watch me put on make up Poor guy.. i do take long to get dressed.

He's also a good cook.. tho we enjoyed cooking together.. i was the potato peeler Just writting this, made me sad.. I miss him so much! 7 months wait for adjudication for a straight I-130??

[Nagishkaw 510]

I just cannot imagine......a lot of things.

[Hanna&Mohamed 0]

I couldnt imagine leaving my family and friends like Mohamed did.Also he had a very good job his own lab. I would move to Egypt with him so fast if he didnt like it here.

The problem was it was so hot when I went the first time with no ac .I told him if we lived there we would have to have ac and there was no way i would kill any chicken! I did cover my hair and wear long sleeves ! Yes it was hot!

I also went in febuary it was freezing then.I told him we have to get a heater.So he did! I was even pregnant then and was so cold.

I understand how he feels now .I felt the same the first time I ever went there so nervous .I told him u will get use to things here very soon.

[Krissy! 0]

If I was in the beneficiary position..... I'll probably miss leaving being my family and so forth, but.... I would also look forward to being with my SO, and the "freedom"....

"Freedom" being of significance importance, especially in my situation -- I have a disability that is often looked upon as shameful (in some countries), and sadly, has several ignorant stereotypes (even in the USA) -- but fortunately the USA does have some acts/laws/policies that help protect disabilities whereas in some other countries doesn't exist.... so it would be something I would be looking forward to getting a "taste of"

Plucking chickens won't be something I would be thrilled to be doing, but then again... it's cultural and if I was born and raised in that culture, I'd be used to it and "think nothing to it"

__________________

My SO actually would have liked if I came to live with him in Dubai instead. I told him "no" at this time because of the "freedom"/jobs I already have here (which was not easy to come by). Maybe IF he ever ends up not liking it here, and finds a very good job (able to support us and the family) elsewhere, I'll move with him in a heartbeat.

And of course, A/C would be a MUST! I'm spoiled in that way.

[Shawna Mahmoud 0]

I would move to Egypt with my husband. I of course like the other sisters, would be nervous and a little sad to leave my family.

I think It would be an easier transition for me because I am older than my husband and I have experienced life a little more than he.

I am not Muslim but I am TOTALLY respectful of my husband wishes. He knew I didn't cover when we met. He likes my hair. I do wear long sleeves but if it's hot, IT'S HOT and I am not down with covering completely up.

I am a "Big" Girl and I would pass the heck out! LMAO

I give so much credit to my husband for going through this process, he is a very strong brother.

I think that the sisters who are struggling with the cultural differences, should definitely look into themselves and be TRUE to YOU.

[Imua 0]

I would go to Nepal in a heartbeat - I love Govi's country and culture. However the biggest fear for me(besides the political situation, which appears to be stabilizing, and the traffic, and the scary street dogs ) is the health care system, which is awful, very similar to the conditions described in the 'health care in MENA' thread. No A/C for me isn't a biggie - I am definitely a hot weather girl and can deal with ceiling fans instead of A/C - it is actually something I look forward to, being able to wear nice summery cottons and not freezing whenever I go inside because the place(like where I work) is like a freezer, not to mention hearing the birds and sounds of nature through the open windows instead of the constant roar of the A/C. Nepal generally doesn't get that hot anyway, not like India. Heat is another story - I need it in the winter up to at least 80 degrees - fortunately my building has steam heat and it gets that hot without my needing to do anything.

I can't imagine leaving my family without knowing when I would be coming back - that would be heartbreaking. Govi's parents have had health problems recently and he has ended up helping out - he has 3 sisters so I guess they will be able to help, but I know it will be very hard for them to be without him.

Thank God Govi's family is vegetarian - peeling potatoes and chopping veggies beats plucking chickens for sure...

[Abderrahim/Kodi 0]

My husband would love it if I said I would move to Morocco. Right now, with a new grandson and a mother who needs my help, I can't. But, we have talked much about it and I have told him maybe someday we will. I have weighed the pros and cons so much. Here are the pros: When I go to visit, I have it easier than some people. His family has a "real" toilet in there home - they don't use it much, but you know I did!! A little portable AC in the bedroom! I was never told how to dress. I am a modest person anyway, and saw many woman in Morocco who dressed "less" than I did. But the biggest pro for me is just the way of life there - so simple and I love that. They don't need all "stuff" we need...families seem to be much closer....less money worries (because you don't have so much). Just much more laid back than our way of life here in the USA. Cons are of course leaving my family - that would be hard...and never knowing when you will have enough money to come back home to visit. Definitely need a heater like some of you said. I was there the last time in December and walked around in the house for 3 weeks with leggings under my pants, 3 shirt on and a hat and gloves. OMG it was soooooooo cold. The animals would bother me too...I saw so much abuse of those poor horses - it made me sick. And all the dogs and cats running around with no homes made me so sad. Maybe I could start a "Human Society" there.??? If i had a cold, I could deal with it...but something more serious, i would freak out with the health care system. I went to the dentist with my husband one day and couldn't believe the equipment they use - I would have to be in some serious pain for that stuff to touch my mouth. Anyway, bottom line for me is this....I think it would be a much easier adjustment for me to go there, then it will be for this kind, good-hearted, god-loving muslim man to come here. I can't even imagine. OH...and the plucking of the chickens??? NO WAY!!!!

[Abderrahim/Kodi 0]

Off topic...but i just noticed I have two blue boxes today...Should i really be this excited about that?? :dance:

[Mommy2ZaidnSalma 11]

I did live in Jordan for almost a year, and although it was easy adating to everything...I could never do it for much longer than that, and reason being, is my family...i do think tho that in the next few years, we will invest in some land, and build a house to vacation to a month or two each year...but that will be the extent of it

[SaadBell 0]

I am cool living anywhere, my husband is super cool, he knows I half listen to most things. Husband might suggest, but he would never make it sound like a demand, but really I always do what I want. I don't like being forced into things, I get strange about that. My husband isn't the typical MENA man, he always pushes me to be more independent, ####### is all that about. My whole family is like that, always pushing me, ok I am cool now.

[Ban Hammer 13,275]

Off topic...but i just noticed I have two blue boxes today...Should i really be this excited about that?? :dance:

[JeanneVictoria 55]

I've lived all over the world and loved each and every place. Have been away for long periods of time, so I know adapatability for me is easy. I dress according to where I am, where i'm going and who I will meet. There is no "set" rule...just be gracious where you are.

Now the chicken thing....ain't NO WAY on this earth would I pluck a chicken...

I don't even eat the thing so they would have to find another "chicken plucker"!!

[sarahaziz 0]

I like the above poster's comment wherever you go be gracious.

Algeria isn't strict as it's comming off as. It's french colonized we salaam unlike most muslim countries with the opposite sex who is familiar vs Saudi where you can't even put your arm around your wife or PDA in public without getting arrested. My babe puts his arm around me everywhere and kisses my forehead in a respectful manner. I wear American clothes. Just as any other muslim country you have your bad people and good people. I personally have never seen a man hit a woman there all my life but that's disgusting behavior. Men's respect is partly carried by his wife since you don't have to do much there to gain respect (i.E. dont need a lot of money to be respected) Algeria is a humble country and humble people.

I can't really answer my original question because i love algeria to death. Studying in France would be cool and living in Algeria would be the best but I make so much easy money in USA

Edited May 12, 2008 by sarahaziz

[SaadBell 0]

Its very fun being a man over there.. they wander around,,, walk out at night... enjoy themselves.. listen to music. If you are a girl that has a brother or are married , you can pretty much expect to be stuck in the house, tearing the feathers out of chickens and sitting around waiting for your husband to show up at home. I also was made to dress in ways I did not want do the fact that he wanted to project a certain image for me so I was sweating to death half the time and extremely unhappy even though I had been to Algeria 3 times before. I can imagine, with heavy hijab, a jilbab, a screaming unhappy and tired pre schooler and a new baby, then being subjected to places with no ac , no sanitation on a regular basis and all kinds of cultural norms... I just cant adjust to.. I just would want to live there if I wasnt married to my husband honestly because if I was allowed to be just a western person it wouldnt be so bad, but I am really expected to tow the whole islamic barbie line and I aint having that again like December.. I really really was pissed at alot I saw... I saw men throwing things at women, slapping them in the head in the streets.. just all kinds of #######.. I like being in America.. Its different in some places.. but I was put through alot and my memories are very unhappy ones

I would be in prision, I could see that happening all ready, I hate being hot, and seeing a man throw things at a women or slapping them in the head, yea, not cool. I don't want to pluck some kind of chicken, while the men are out enjoying themselves, and the worst, NO AC, MUST HAVE AC.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I like the above poster's comment wherever you go be gracious.

Algeria isn't strict as it's comming off as. It's french colonized we salaam unlike most muslim countries with the opposite sex who is familiar vs Saudi where you can't even put your arm around your wife or PDA in public without getting arrested. My babe puts his arm around me everywhere and kisses my forehead in a respectful manner. I wear American clothes. Just as any other muslim country you have your bad people and good people. I personally have never seen a man hit a woman there all my life but that's disgusting behavior. Men's respect is partly carried by his wife since you don't have to do much there to gain respect (i.E. dont need a lot of money to be respected) Algeria is a humble country and humble people.

I can't really answer my original question because i love algeria to death. Studying in France would be cool and living in Algeria would be the best but I make so much easy money in USA

I don't know what Algeria you are living in but lots of women DO NOT WEAR WESTERN CLOTHES. Kissing on the forehead in public ( are you sure you were in the same Algeria I was?) I never saw one man on 4 different trips kiss a woman in public. The majority of the women I saw in Oran with normal clothes after dark were "working girls" if you know what I mean. If women were in western clothes they were conservatively dressed and most that I saw that were "married" WORE HIJAB. How can you as an non muslim Algerian even have a remote concept of what daily life is like for an Algerian MUSLIM woman? First, even practicing christianity in Algeria is next to impossible with very few churches open and running and churches being shut down daily and bible importing outlawed. I have absolutely no idea where exactly in Algeria you were but it must have been in KABILYE( berber area) because I cannot for the life of me imagine him smooching you walking down the street. There are western dressed women but they are certainly not running around after dark, rarely walking alone and most married MUSLIM woman wear hijab. There are some that dont but even their movement is restricted after dark and certainly it is NOT Algerian custom to kiss in public.