Got my conditional resident card, my wife might be pregnant from other man!

[Europeanboy 0]

Get a DNA Test.

DNA test fails get the heck out of there.

So You think that If I am not the father I will be able to waive the conditions.

[*JG* 2]

All I can really think to say to all this is I am so sorry. I hope it all works out for you.

[Europeanboy 0]

I just found this online:

Depending upon your state, there is an automatic presumption that children born during the course of a marriage are the biological children of the husband. You will be responsible for this child should you divorce, so I would recommend that you have a paternity test to ensure that you are the father. Additionally, some states will not allow a couple to divorce while the wife is pregnant, even if the wife admits that the child was fathered by another man. Check with a Board Certified Family Law Attorney in your state to find out the best options for you.

[ikyang 1]

For me it doesn't matter if you are the father or not. THE FACT THAT SHE SLEPT WITH ANOTHER MAN WHILE YOU ARE STILL MARRIED THAT SUCKS! she will do it again and again.

get divorce, then move on!

[wifetobe 2]

why would u divorse her and still live with her? shouldnt u move out and move on with ur life?

I agree with you, Donna.

[Gaby&Talbert 1]

BE CAREFUL if you don't get the paternity test then you will be responsable for the child and have to pay support if you divorce. If you don't pay or get behind then it can and will affect your ability to become a citizen.

Once a cheater always a cheater.

[honeyblonde 0]

For me it doesn't matter if you are the father or not. THE FACT THAT SHE SLEPT WITH ANOTHER MAN WHILE YOU ARE STILL MARRIED THAT SUCKS! she will do it again and again.

get divorce, then move on!

BE CAREFUL if you don't get the paternity test then you will be responsable for the child and have to pay support if you divorce. If you don't pay or get behind then it can and will affect your ability to become a citizen.

Once a cheater always a cheater.

I totally agree with these two. If she cheated once, she'll do it again whenever she is lonely. You could end up paying child support for 18 years on some other mans kid. Get an attorney if you decide to get a divorce, which is probably your best choice, no matter how painful it might be.

[Minya's wife 24]

At our interview we showed the pregnancy center examination paper as an evidence!

That's great. Now the interview is over and what you showed there is irrelevant.

WHY? Pregnancy is one of the best evidences you could have. How could I have known?

Pregnancy is the best evidence that you and your spouse had sex....not that you and your spouse are married and are living together as husband and wife. In applying for AOS based on marriage to a US citizen, the latter is what you need to prove. A pregnancy only proves that two people had unprotected sex.....and unfortunately the situation you're presented with is even more of a demonstration of that fact.

Do some soul searching...decide if you want to continue in your marriage or not. Once that choce is made, proceed accordingly. Regardless of your choice, you will be able to remove conditions to your residency. Its just a question of whether you will be doing it as married, or as single.

Good luck,

-P

[Europeanboy 0]

I think you people are right. I work so hard to make her happy. I could say that even working overnight 4-5 days I have always taken care of my wife sexually. I married the most beautiful girl in the neighborhood. I love her but I want my own kids. So you think that I should get a family lawyer

they probably charge 2 k for that kind of complicated cases. That's what I paid for my AOS to my immigration attorney + 2k for a family lawyer + DNA paternity test I don't know how to start acting now. Do we have to request the DNA at the time of birth or if we do it after are they going to automaticly put my name on the birth certificate?

[russian_armenian 4]

I think DNA test is must in this situation. So, save money for this test. Keep all paperwork, all docs to prove that marriage is bona fide and you lived together. Pictures, utility bils, statements form friends-assemble it now. Some people write here that after divorce they were left without any evidence. In yor case the chance that chhild is not yours, I guess, 50/50. If child is not yours, you don't want your name on birth cert and pay child support for 18 years. Might make you feel bitter-cheating plus shalding money every month. I don't see any point living together till I-751 if test proves that your are not father. That is would be very hard and sooner or later the bitter feelings would surface (no matter how much you love her). If you get enough evidence about good intentions about marrage-you should be fine with waiver in removing conditions.

At our interview we showed the pregnancy center examination paper as an evidence!

That's great. Now the interview is over and what you showed there is irrelevant.

WHY? Pregnancy is one of the best evidences you could have. How could I have known?

[Minya's wife 24]

I think DNA test is must in this situation. So, save money for this test. Keep all paperwork, all docs to prove that marriage is bona fide and you lived together. Pictures, utility bils, statements form friends-assemble it now. Some people write here that after divorce they were left without any evidence. In yor case the chance that chhild is not yours, I guess, 50/50. If child is not yours, you don't want your name on birth cert and pay child support for 18 years. Might make you feel bitter-cheating plus shalding money every month. I don't see any point living together till I-751 if test proves that your are not father. That is would be very hard and sooner or later the bitter feelings would surface (no matter how much you love her). If you get enough evidence about good intentions about marrage-you should be fine with waiver in removing conditions.

ETA: nevermind...I can't read

-P

Edited April 24, 2008 by Paula&Minya

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Get a DNA Test.

DNA test fails get the heck out of there.

So You think that If I am not the father I will be able to waive the conditions.

I don't understand the preoccupation with whether or not you can remove conditions if the child is not your biological child! There are many couples that have children in the family that have different biological fathers, the difference here is that for obvious and understandable reasons, you were not a part of a decision like that, but your reaction speaks more against the legitimacy of your marriage than the illegitimate child itself!

[ihateemo 0]

Just to add to the apocryphal anecdotes about cheating whores:

A musician friend of mine in Dallas was recently ordered to pay child support for a child that is not his. Why? Because his name is listed on the birth certificate. The ex could have waived the child support requirement (and gone after the REAL father), but she won't because she is a money grubbing witch and works as a stripper in some low rent club, my friend is a successful artist and the real father is a deadbeat.

Please, please, please GET A DNA TEST. Isn't there some test that can determine paternity before the child is born (I saw that on an episode of Nip/Tuck, I think)? If you are NOT the father do not let your wife put your name on the birth certificate or you will be hosed.

Also, this thread made me feel much better about my upcoming divorce. Haha! Thanks!

As for your immigration - see a lawyer.

That is all.

[Europeanboy 0]

Get a DNA Test.

DNA test fails get the heck out of there.

So You think that If I am not the father I will be able to waive the conditions.

I don't understand the preoccupation with whether or not you can remove conditions if the child is not your biological child! There are many couples that have children in the family that have different biological fathers, the difference here is that for obvious and understandable reasons, you were not a part of a decision like that, but your reaction speaks more against the legitimacy of your marriage than the illegitimate child itself!

What about my reaction? How would you feel if you were me? I am still very young I can have my own kids! "reaction speaks more against the legitimacy of your marriage than the illegitimate child itself!" You want me to suck it UP for 18 years! I really love my wife but I am not sure how much she does. I wanted to make her a princess. She had been staying home without working before she finally got a job last week after a lot of arguments.

[mawilson 2,133]

What about my reaction? How would you feel if you were me? I am still very young I can have my own kids! "reaction speaks more against the legitimacy of your marriage than the illegitimate child itself!" You want me to suck it UP for 18 years! I really love my wife but I am not sure how much she does. I wanted to make her a princess. She had been staying home without working before she finally got a job last week after a lot of arguments.

A lot of couples adopt children and raise them as their own and don't consider it "sucking it up for 18 years."

If you want your own kids, have your own kids, but treating your step-children with such disregard is criminal.