Couple of things!!?? Am I scre*ed?

[Roselinda 5]

Sorry. It's us again

Firstly I need some advice. My son's father, although he has no parental rights over here, I have been told it's not the same for the States and the Embassy will want some kind of notarised document from him stating it's ok to take his son away?

My problem now is that he won't come out of hiding When we spoke about this last year he agreed and everything was fine.

As far as I'm aware he still does, however he has not seen his son for over a year. My son is now 5 and to be honest his father has only seen him for around 6 months out of 5 years.

He chooses not to be found as he has a new life by all accounts! Hmm?? Anyway, what do I do with regards to getting some kind of document? Am I scre*ed? He has never paid a penny for his son and I don't want anything from him. What should I do?

Secondly, and I'm sorry for going on. My SO bless him, has no idea how to go about getting his I-134 notarised. It is correct that it needs to be right?

Any advice as always (and I mean always) would be greatly appreciated.

[sara..... 371]

Sorry. It's us again

Firstly I need some advice. My son's father, although he has no parental rights over here, I have been told it's not the same for the States and the Embassy will want some kind of notarised document from him stating it's ok to take his son away?

My problem now is that he won't come out of hiding When we spoke about this last year he agreed and everything was fine.

As far as I'm aware he still does, however he has not seen his son for over a year. My son is now 5 and to be honest his father has only seen him for around 6 months out of 5 years.

He chooses not to be found as he has a new life by all accounts! Hmm?? Anyway, what do I do with regards to getting some kind of document? Am I scre*ed? He has never paid a penny for his son and I don't want anything from him. What should I do?

Secondly, and I'm sorry for going on. My SO bless him, has no idea how to go about getting his I-134 notarised. It is correct that it needs to be right?

Any advice as always (and I mean always) would be greatly appreciated.

hmmm im not sure who did it but i think someone went to court to get it done im not sure how but i bet they see this topic and will give u great advise anyway good luck to u and i hope it all gets worked out

[aravis227 1]

Sorry. It's us again

Firstly I need some advice. My son's father, although he has no parental rights over here, I have been told it's not the same for the States and the Embassy will want some kind of notarised document from him stating it's ok to take his son away?

My problem now is that he won't come out of hiding When we spoke about this last year he agreed and everything was fine.

As far as I'm aware he still does, however he has not seen his son for over a year. My son is now 5 and to be honest his father has only seen him for around 6 months out of 5 years.

He chooses not to be found as he has a new life by all accounts! Hmm?? Anyway, what do I do with regards to getting some kind of document? Am I scre*ed? He has never paid a penny for his son and I don't want anything from him. What should I do?

Secondly, and I'm sorry for going on. My SO bless him, has no idea how to go about getting his I-134 notarised. It is correct that it needs to be right?

Any advice as always (and I mean always) would be greatly appreciated.

I can only answer the less important of your questions. Most banks and post offices have notaries available. There is a fee, but I think it's like $15 or $20. He should be able to just take it in (filled out but NOT signed) and they will witness him signing it and put their stamp on it. I hope everything works out with your son...there must be a way around that, there are a lot of people out there who have kids where the other parent has disappeared. Good luck!

[melusine 5]

i guess you need to take action to find the biologic dad anyway...so you can have a new life too.

Also, i read a story recently in Canada that they hold the visa till they got the authorization from the dad. I would suggest to call your embassy and ask.

Edited April 16, 2008 by melusine

[*JG* 2]

I would say exhaust all avenues in finding his father. If he is that elusive, you may have to hire a P.I.

[trinket 30]

I do remember the post Estadia is talking about, think the lady is from Germany.

Since you are the one who is taking care of your son, do you have any papers from court saying you have the sole custody of your son? I think that should work or if you can find something similar to that, can have a notarised affidavit stating the same.

[trinket 30]

Here, found that post

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?act=findpost&pid=1742039

[Roselinda 5]

Well we were never married but he is named on the Birth Certificate.

The law here states that as my son was born prior to December 2003, although his father is on the BC he has no parental rights unless he goes to court to try to obtain it.

Which he won't as he knows he'd have to start paying for his upbringing.

I've never asked his father for anything and have worked hard to give my son a comfortable and stable life and happy life so why should I have to put our lives on hold just because his father is being an idiot?

I guess I'll keep trying and just hope for the best.

[jundp 191]

Roselinda,

You need to talk to a lawyer or someone at Family Services (do they have that in UK?) about this. The last thing you want is to get everything as far as the interview (or God forbid, the airport!) and find out that you have to wait even longer. Since you are waiting now, do what you can to find the father and obtain his legal permission to take his son out of the UK. I don't think the US embassy will care that he's a total deadbeat and an idiot, what they will care about is not infringing on the rights of a father when it comes to taking his son out of the country. Of course there is more to it than that, but it will be an issue, so while you're waiting you should definitely get all the documents you need and find out legally where you stand with custody.

I have no idea if that made sense or not, and I only know the family laws of my state, obviously not UK. I would be required to have permission from my ex to take the kids out of the state, much less the country. I would imagine it's similar everywhere.

[lucy4 11]

Well we were never married but he is named on the Birth Certificate.

The law here states that as my son was born prior to December 2003, although his father is on the BC he has no parental rights unless he goes to court to try to obtain it.

Which he won't as he knows he'd have to start paying for his upbringing.

I've never asked his father for anything and have worked hard to give my son a comfortable and stable life and happy life so why should I have to put our lives on hold just because his father is being an idiot?

I guess I'll keep trying and just hope for the best.

If the law states that, then you should be able to go to a lawyer and get a statement from the court stating that you are the sole parent with rights to the child.

Honestly, I dont think you are screwed, as the earnest is usually on the father to prove he does play a part in the childs life as opposed to the mother. However, since his name is on the birth certificate, I would be sure to have the court issued statement.

[BlakeandOlha 0]

Well we were never married but he is named on the Birth Certificate.

The law here states that as my son was born prior to December 2003, although his father is on the BC he has no parental rights unless he goes to court to try to obtain it.

Which he won't as he knows he'd have to start paying for his upbringing.

I've never asked his father for anything and have worked hard to give my son a comfortable and stable life and happy life so why should I have to put our lives on hold just because his father is being an idiot?

I guess I'll keep trying and just hope for the best.

If the law states that, then you should be able to go to a lawyer and get a statement from the court stating that you are the sole parent with rights to the child.

Honestly, I dont think you are screwed, as the earnest is usually on the father to prove he does play a part in the childs life as opposed to the mother. However, since his name is on the birth certificate, I would be sure to have the court issued statement.

In the absence of a father's consent then a court statement (order or finding) is a requirement. You should start on this right away as I imagine it could take a while.

[erintoronto 0]

I guess I'll keep trying and just hope for the best.

roselinda,

i'm sure you'll figure things out very soon and i'm positive it will all work out for the best. it sounds like you are a GREAT mom.

hang in there.

[TracyTN 237]

In the absence of a father's consent then a court statement (order or finding) is a requirement. You should start on this right away as I imagine it could take a while.