~Off Topic Thread~

[*julez* 124]

That is the only way I'm my mom's kid. I'm a shopper, and not the best saver. Total 100% yuppie girl...I like my haircuts, my shoes, purses...did I say shoes again LOL?

I think I have at least 50 pairs of shoes. My poor OH! I think when we have our own place my stuff will take up 99% of the closet space!

I'm a shopaholic too! If only I had more time and money!!!

[Alex & Rachel 78]

Hannah you crack me up!!! I literally laughed out loud here at work! I guess you didn't go for the Brazilian!

Nope, not yet anyway - I rather suspect more er... intimate waxing would be much more painful! I've had several scary at home waxing mishaps and my body reacts badly to shaving (itchy rash... not exactly comfortable or attractive) so I've been a bit stuck trying to figure what to do and figured I had to at least try salon waxing. I read up a lot about it first and found out that you should avoid going during the 10 days leading up to your period as you are most sensitive to pain then. I've never even had my legs waxed before so I was uber worried it would be hideous, but really it was almost completely painless - didn't even sting a bit afterwards.

AND it only cost £7!!!

Bargain!

I'd like more clothes/shoes, but even when I have the money I find shopping a hassle. I have to try clothes on, and I especially have to try shoes on (wide feet, narrow heels/ankles...sigh). I sometimes fantasise about having the money to have my own personal shopper with me to walk around and pick things out and I'd just have to follow her commands and place down the money

[Krikit 1,163]

Nope, not yet anyway - I rather suspect more er... intimate waxing would be much more painful! I've had several scary at home waxing mishaps and my body reacts badly to shaving (itchy rash... not exactly comfortable or attractive) so I've been a bit stuck trying to figure what to do and figured I had to at least try salon waxing. I read up a lot about it first and found out that you should avoid going during the 10 days leading up to your period as you are most sensitive to pain then. I've never even had my legs waxed before so I was uber worried it would be hideous, but really it was almost completely painless - didn't even sting a bit afterwards.

That bolded bit's true. There are anti-bump/rash products on the market which are quite good. Check the ethnic aisle..... they have good shaving products for men because of how their facial hair grows.

I remember one of my co-workers bringing in a catalogue from one of those home sex parties. That came out wrong. Hopefully, you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, we ended up in a conversation which began with a teddy which looked something like this.....

I jokingly said that "Oh, this would look attractive after shaving.... it would match my razor rash." And my friend said "Especially when you've got those little pieces of tissue stuck to all the little bumps." We all ended up crying with laughter and disrupting the entire office.... and all the guys coming into my office wondering what was going on. I miss my former co-workers.

[no name 1]

Hannah you crack me up!!! I literally laughed out loud here at work! I guess you didn't go for the Brazilian!

Nope, not yet anyway - I rather suspect more er... intimate waxing would be much more painful! I've had several scary at home waxing mishaps and my body reacts badly to shaving (itchy rash... not exactly comfortable or attractive) so I've been a bit stuck trying to figure what to do and figured I had to at least try salon waxing. I read up a lot about it first and found out that you should avoid going during the 10 days leading up to your period as you are most sensitive to pain then. I've never even had my legs waxed before so I was uber worried it would be hideous, but really it was almost completely painless - didn't even sting a bit afterwards.

AND it only cost £7!!!

£7 for a bikini wax????? Where???

[English Muffin 59]

Hannah you crack me up!!! I literally laughed out loud here at work! I guess you didn't go for the Brazilian!

Nope, not yet anyway - I rather suspect more er... intimate waxing would be much more painful! I've had several scary at home waxing mishaps and my body reacts badly to shaving (itchy rash... not exactly comfortable or attractive) so I've been a bit stuck trying to figure what to do and figured I had to at least try salon waxing. I read up a lot about it first and found out that you should avoid going during the 10 days leading up to your period as you are most sensitive to pain then. I've never even had my legs waxed before so I was uber worried it would be hideous, but really it was almost completely painless - didn't even sting a bit afterwards.

AND it only cost £7!!!

I get nasty rashes from shaving too. I use an epilator now, the best thing ever invented.

Gillian

[ginger1981 0]

http://wikiality.com/The_British_Empire

For fans of the Colbert Report.

[a-jeanne 2]

Did you guys catch this one - it was posted a while back...

Wax is not your friend!

_________________________________________________

All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair... and now... the wax.

My night began as any other normal weeknight.

Come home, fix dinner, play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours:

"Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet."

So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom.

It was one of those "cold wax" kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. ("Cold wax," yeah...right!)

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works! OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad.

I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me!

I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I apply the one strip across the right side of my

bikini line, covering the right half of my *hoo-hoo* and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (Yes, it was a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself....RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. #######!!!

Another deep breath and RRIIPP!! Everything is swirly and spotted.!? I think I may pass out... must stay conscious... Do I hear crashing drums???

Breathe, breathe... OK, back to normal.

I want to see my trophy - a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the

glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There's no hair on it! Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip. I touch.

I am touching wax.

#######! I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake... remember my foot is still propped up

on the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.

DANG!!!!!!!! I hear the slamming of a cell door.

Hoo-Hoo?? sealed shut!

Butt?? Sealed shut!

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself, "Please don't let me get the urge to poop.

My head may pop off!"

What can I do to melt the wax? Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!!!

I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???

WRONG!!!!!!!

I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit.

Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub... in scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.

So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cement-epoxied myself to the porcelain!!

God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!

I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter -

"So, my butt and who-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!"

There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is located, "Are we talking cheeks or who-ha?"

She's laughing out loud by now... I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!!

I should be the joke of someone else's night.

While we go through various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!

By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving grace.... the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.

What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care. IT WORKS!! It works!!

I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up.

I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair.... THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!

So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

Next week I'm going to try hair color......

Now thats funny . Notttttttttt

[Jeraly 4]

I've just had my first ever bikini wax and was totally surprised by how little pain is involved! I am totally having that done regularly from now on.

Erm... probably seems an odd thing to post but I've been worried for the past two days about how much it would hurt and I'm overcome by relief-induced euphoria!

I have always wanted to wax and never had the guts... thing is I would *have* to have a brazillian or something just because it would annoy me otherwise... and that just... ouchies... sounds soooo nasty...

[Jeraly 4]

Oh Audrey - that is genius!! Just what I needed! Some light-hearted relief from massive anxiety and stress about immigration tomorrow!

Hey - has Phil entered the US since you started this visa process? Has he had any trouble at all?

[weedebz 0]

that is the funniest thing I've read in ages...OMG I was almost off the chair laughing

[a-jeanne 2]

Oh Audrey - that is genius!! Just what I needed! Some light-hearted relief from massive anxiety and stress about immigration tomorrow!

Hey - has Phil entered the US since you started this visa process? Has he had any trouble at all?

I'm glad that you thought it was funny - it's just what we all need, huh?

Yes, Phil has entered the US - many times. In March, May, June, July, September, October, November and our trip to Figi in December. He was questioned on the November trip as to why he was coming here so often. He explained to see his girlfriend and a bit of business. They gave him the hardest time however when he met me in Chicago for our flight out to Figi. They wanted to know why he was not carrying much luggage for a 10 day trip? He just told them that his clothes were already there and they let him be on his merry way.

I hope that you have a great trip - be safe. Definately send pics.

[Ban Hammer 13,105]

g'morning uk.

i see someone discovered brazilian waxing

[*julez* 124]

g'morning uk.

i see someone discovered brazilian waxing

good morning charles!

I hear you like the brazilian for yourself!

[Ban Hammer 13,105]

g'morning uk.

i see someone discovered brazilian waxing

good morning charles!

I hear you like the brazilian for yourself!

just for my back, otherwise i can be mistaken for shag carpeting.

[Krikit 1,163]

just for my back, otherwise i can be mistaken for shag carpeting.

Just don't start sharing those pics with us again.